When you are faced with having to negotiate a dispute, it’s a good idea to first thoroughly understand your adversary’s position. Sun Tzu stated in his book from the sixth century b.c., The Art of War, that when you know both yourself and your enemy then victory will not stand in doubt. Invite your adversary to tell you about his point of view. Then articulate your understanding of what he has told you. Ask him for suggestions on how to resolve the dispute. You then will be in the optimal position for offering your own ideas and, hopefully, come to some resolution with the other party.