My family’s very talented,
I’m certain you’ll agree.
We each possess a special
skill that anyone can see.
My brother’s good at burying
his finger up his nose.
My sister’s good at covering
her room with dirty clothes.
My father’s good at eating soup
in big, disgusting slurps.
My mother’s good at cutting loose
with world-record burps.
Our dog is good at piddling in
the back seat of the car.
The baby’s good at putting
Pop-Tarts in the VCR.
Myself I’m good at sleeping late
and making lots of noise,
and cluttering the living room
with comic books and toys.
So though we’re very talented,
I’m sad to say it’s true:
We’re only good at doing things
we’re not supposed to do.