SEB DOZED eventually. The pain in his head had dulled enough for him to do so, but he stayed on the couch. Gray would be sleeping in here. In his room. With me. And Seb wasn’t sure how he felt about that, at all. He didn’t remember Mrs. P ever staying with him, but he knew she had just after his mom died. He’d never liked any of the nannies his dad tried to employ. They were probably very competent, but for someone who just lost his mom, he hadn’t been very receptive toward a replacement. Over the years he’d become good at sneaking downstairs and watching people talk about him when they didn’t know he was there. All that spying helped him learn to read lips pretty quickly.
At the light touch to his arm, he opened his eyes, and he took a second to allow himself to be surprised and to wonder why that was. It was odd. He hated people in here, and this time Gray had walked in.
And you let him. Seb always locked the door. The thought of him not knowing when someone entered the room freaked him out, but not this time. Maybe he was sicker than he thought? He wasn’t dizzy, though, and his headache had cleared.
Gray stood there holding a small bag, a blanket, and a pillow. Wow, he was serious. For some reason Seb had expected Gray to back down after he met Andrew. He was sure Andrew would have persuaded Gray there wasn’t a threat. He was torn again.
“Did you get some rest? I’m sorry I woke you up. Is it okay if I call you Sebastian?”
Seb’s nose wrinkled at the name. “Seb,” he mouthed rather than spoke. His dad insisted on calling him Sebastian. Gray nodded and looked at the half-eaten power bar Seb had valiantly tried.
“Would you like some toast instead?”
Seb shook his head. He wasn’t hungry, but his slim frame didn’t carry enough extra pounds, and he’d been sick quite a bit this week.
“The only way into your bathroom is through your bedroom.”
Seb followed Gray’s gaze toward the door to his room. It hadn’t been a question, he didn’t think, but sometimes the nuances of speech were lost on him. He was better when he knew a person. His bathroom had been made by taking space from his bedroom. Originally the rooms had both been separate, but once he wanted his piano up here, his dad did some remodeling, and as there was only ever him in here walking through his room to get to the bathroom, it had never been a problem. Was that the point Gray was making? That he would have to come through Seb’s bedroom in the night?
“I saw another bathroom in the corridor. I’m not interested in violating your privacy, but I need to be able to leave the room to use it, and I was worried the door opening may disturb you.” He gestured to the light. “Does it also alert you when you’re in there?”
Seb shook his head. He simply locked his door. His phone was set up to vibrate violently during the night, and he slept with it in an arm holster, so he would feel it.
“It only comes on when someone knocks.” There was a pad that activated the door. He hadn’t wanted a bell. Seb didn’t say any of that, though. He was keeping words to a minimum and watching Gray to check he understood. He was tired and knew his words slurred when that happened. Gray nodded again and tossed the pillow and blanket on the couch.
Seb was suddenly uncomfortable and got up to head for his bedroom. Then he paused, wondering if he should say something—“good night” maybe. He shook the thought off and went into his room, but before he fully closed the door, he felt guilty, churlish even. The man was risking his life to protect Seb’s. But Gray had his back to him, and as Seb came into the room, Gray lifted his shirt and pulled it over his head.
Seb must have made some horrified sound, and Gray whipped around. For a second Seb stood there immobile, his brain processing the most god-awful mangled and scarred skin littering Gray’s back. “I’m sorry,” Seb blurted. “I just wanted to say good night.”
Gray took a breath, holding his shirt in front of him, and Seb flushed. He could feel the heat practically climbing his body. He whirled around before he could say or do anything else to embarrass himself and closed the door.
SOMETHING WOKE him much later, and he lay there for a few minutes, wondering why. It wasn’t a noise obviously, and he didn’t need to pee especially. He hadn’t slept well since last week, and he ran a hand over his eyes and tried to relax. It wasn’t just his speech that was bad when he was tired. He ran a risk of migraines as well—and not only was the pain hell on earth, but they usually messed with his balance and made him nauseous, if not downright sick like yesterday.
The last sight that had burned the back of his eyes came into his head—Gray’s skin. He couldn’t imagine what caused such horrific injuries, or how much it must have hurt. Had he been burned? Maybe trapped in a fire? Seb’s dad had told him Gray Darling was ex-military, but they had no other details. There were horrific reports on TV every so often about explosions and attacks in war-torn countries, but according to his dad, Gray had never been deployed overseas. His dad said the military was probably glad to see Gray leave, but Seb wasn’t sure. There was a stillness about Gray, but it wasn’t an easy one. The man was all about control, and for a second, Seb wondered what it would be like to see it go.
Then he wasn’t sure he ever wanted to find out.
After another few minutes, Seb decided going back to sleep was pointless and sat up cautiously. He felt fine, but he still had the song he had been working on yesterday running around in his head, and he wanted to write it down. He got up eagerly, pulled on his robe, and opened the door, then came to an abrupt halt as a shadow moved away from the window. For a second, a wave of panic crashed over him until he recognized Gray.
“Sorry, did I disturb you?”
Seb caught the wince on Gray’s face when he realized what he said. He couldn’t have disturbed Seb because Seb wouldn’t have heard anything. Seb was worried it might be awkward after last night, but they hadn’t even arrived at easy yet, so it should be no different. Seb shook his head and then looked longingly at his piano. He glanced back at Gray.
“If you want to play, it won’t bother me.”
Seb smiled. It would bother the rest of the house, though, and he took out his headphones from the box next to the piano and connected them. He glanced at Gray and nearly laughed when he saw the puzzled look. He was willing to bet Gray had never heard of a silent piano. Seb sat in front of the keys and pulled over his sheets of notes and a pen, then fitted the slim headphones just over his ears. He closed his eyes and ran his fingers over the keys, preparing to immerse himself and get to the place where he’d been struggling with the chorus last time. He opened his eyes instantly at the touch on his arm and looked at Gray, who had moved next to him.
“What are you doing?” Gray seemed curious, and Seb took a little pity on him.
“This is a silent piano,” he said. “Designed so when I wear the headphones, no one else can hear.”
Gray opened his mouth, then closed it, and Seb knew what he was going to ask. “No, obviously I can’t hear it, but this way, no one else can either.” Seb waited to breathe until he had judged Gray’s reaction. Gray smiled. “It keeps them out of the way if I just loop them behind my ears.”
“Very cool.”
It was, except Gray really had no idea. Seb turned back and soon got lost in his head, working out the kinks in the chorus and even playing with the last verse. He stopped after who knew how long and sighed. He felt the touch on his arm again and opened his eyes.
“What’s wrong?”
Seb shrugged. He wasn’t going to tell Gray how he loved his songs and how he was sick of writing them for other people to sing. How he dreamed of hearing them being played in a packed concert hall. How he really dreamed of people hearing him sing them. He’d been careless only once, but even Arron didn’t know about the songs. It wouldn’t happen again. He took his headphones off and glanced at Gray. “You didn’t need to stay awake for me.”
Gray smiled. “I was awake anyway.” Seb’s eyes slid nervously to the window, remembering that something had also woken him up. Gray touched his arm for his attention. “It’s okay. I’m just a bad sleeper.”
“So am I.”
Gray’s eyes narrowed, and Seb realized he’d spoken the thought out loud.
“How about we both try again because I really need you to get up early tomorrow.” Gray glanced at his watch and back to Seb. “Today.”
“For the windows,” Seb replied and stood suddenly, ridiculously pleased he had an excuse to look at Gray’s face.
“No,” Gray chuckled. Seb wished then he could hear him. He knew the sound would be rich and deep. “I want you to do something with me in the morning every day before breakfast.”
Seb yawned but didn’t bother replying. He never ate breakfast and that had zero to do with his safety. Gray couldn’t make him.
NOT ENOUGH hours later, Seb woke instantly at the shake of his shoulder but knew who it was. He opened his eyes to look at Gray’s. He groaned suddenly, warm and willing to sleep the morning away. “I’m not hungry.”
Gray’s eyes crinkled. “Good, because I’m not feeding you.”
That got Seb’s attention. “What are we doing?” Then he noticed the clothes in Gray’s hands. They were his. Gray tossed them next to him onto the bed.
“Get dressed. Meet me in there.” He gestured to the other room and walked out.
Seb knew his mouth was hanging open, but curiosity got the better of him, and he climbed out of bed and started getting dressed. He looked at his new phone and then did a double take. Five fifty? What the hell?
He shivered. It was freezing, and the heating would only have just clicked on if they were lucky. Seb quickly pulled on his socks, sweatpants, T-shirt, and a sweatshirt, then paused. Gray had even brought in his old sneakers that he vaguely remembered tossing into the cupboard in the other room. Both his Converse and his Nikes were downstairs, but even so, why would he need them? And it was too early to see the guy who was making alterations to the windows and stuff… and Seb had told Gray he didn’t eat breakfast. Grumbling quietly, he noted his clothes were a little looser than last time he had worn them. He really was going to have to try to get more power bars or something for up here. He quickly ran into his bathroom to brush his teeth.
Shivering slightly, he walked out of his room and came to an abrupt stop. Gray stood waiting for him. He also had thin sweatpants on and just a T-shirt, socks, and sneakers.
“What are we doing?” Seb asked in confusion.
Gray nodded to the door. “We’re going into your backyard.”
Seb blinked, half convinced his excellent lip-reading ability had suddenly stopped working. “Why?”
“Because I do tai chi. It’s excellent for balance, posture, and relaxation. You’re going to do it with me.”
Seb was sure he spent more time around this guy with his mouth hanging open than anything else. He was going to protest, but Gray was no longer looking at him. He was simply holding his door open. Tai chi? He’d heard of it, obviously, but wasn’t that some sort of martial art stuff? Like tae kwon do, defensive shit. Maybe his new bodyguard thought he ought to be able to protect himself. Seb followed Gray down the stairs. Yeah—he could actually get on board with that. Everyone treated him like he was delicate around here. He wouldn’t mind something a little different.
They walked through and out the kitchen door after Gray disabled the alarm. Gray seemed to know where he was going, so he must have been in here last night. He unbolted the big wooden door and stepped outside. Seb followed him and cringed as the icy temperatures hit him. “You know the dining room’s empty,” he said hopefully. Then he thought again as Gray glanced at him. “I could push back the furniture so we don’t break anything.”
Gray came to a stop. “Why would we break anything?” He looked genuinely puzzled.
Seb shrugged. “I guess when you jump me.”
Gray’s eyes narrowed. “I’m not going to jump you.”
“Well, maybe not, but I guess there’ll be hold positions, right? Maybe choking?” Seb put his arm up and tried to see if he thought he could get it around Gray’s neck like they did on TV. Gray wasn’t that much taller than him. He focused back on Gray’s face in case he missed any instruction to see Gray’s lips tilted in a half smile. Had he missed him saying something?
“You don’t have to worry about hurting me,” Seb assured him. “I’m stronger than I look.”
“Good to know,” Gray said and pointed to the grass. “Stand there.”
Seb obediently moved to about six feet away from Gray and turned to him expectantly. “What do I do?” he asked eagerly. “Do you want me to pretend I don’t see you?”
Gray tilted his head to the side, and Seb flushed nervously. He was excited. He probably mangled that question.
“Do you—” he started enunciating slowly.
“I’m not sure what you think is going to happen, but I want you to look at me. Stand with your feet apart and at about the same width as your shoulders and bend your knees.” Gray demonstrated. Seb copied him, a little worried he was going to ask Seb to do some advanced move he’d never seen. Should he tell Gray he was a beginner? Did Gray think Andrew had taught him to defend himself?
“Take a deep breath at the same time as you raise both arms to give your lungs room to expand.”
Seb copied, feeling a little silly to be honest, and shot a quick glance at the house.
Gray stopped, and Seb focused on him. “Concentrate on me,” he chided, and Seb flushed slightly. “Now when you breathe out, let both your arms come down, palms down as if you were going to touch your thighs.”
Seb did, then waited expectantly, but Gray just closed his eyes and repeated the movement. Seb waited a beat and then copied. Maybe this was some warm-up routine?
Gray opened his eyes but kept moving, and Seb copied. “Don’t forget to breathe.”
Seb took a deep breath in. The cold, crisp air felt kind of nice. His experience with the outside lately was just in between the car and whatever building he was coming out of or going into.
Gray nodded approvingly. “I’m going to turn around. I won’t speak, but I want you to be able to copy me. If I need you to listen I will touch your shoulder. As soon as you have the second move down just close your eyes. Don’t forget to breathe.”
Seb watched part astonished and part fascinated as Gray—who he was sure could kill him with his little finger—breathed and posed, well, like some kind of dancer, if that was even the right word. He repeated a second pose and then a third. It was one of the strangest things Seb had ever seen—completely incongruous on the big man—and Seb felt really silly for the first few minutes until he decided watching Gray and not doing it was just as lame, so he might as well. It was weird but after a few repetitions, Seb’s breathing seemed to get deeper and he relaxed into the monotony. It was probably the nearest he had ever gotten to sleeping while standing up. He was almost surprised when he felt the firm hand on his shoulder and opened his eyes.
Gray was smiling at him.
He took another deep, settling breath and smiled back, happy and oddly content.
“Perfect. We’ll go and get some breakfast now. I’ll expand our routine every morning.”
“That’s it?” Seb asked in surprise.
Gray nodded. “Tai chi is classed as a martial art, but I want you to use it for balance, relaxation, and posture. I think it might help your vertigo.” He shrugged. “It certainly won’t hurt.”
Seb was still struggling with the whole idea. “I thought you were teaching me what to do if someone attacks me.”
Gray shook his head.
“But then what do I use for defense?”
Gray chuckled and held the kitchen door open. “Me.”