It began two weeks ago, but Hanson doesn’t know that yet.
All he knows is that he sees Frodo during the duo finale. Frodo is preparing for her speech, saying her lines to herself, and she catches Hanson’s eye.
“Dude, I’m so sorry,” says Frodo.
“What?” says Hanson.
“They’re looking for you.”
“Who is?”
And at that moment, Hanson’s phone buzzes. It’s the contest organizers. They need to talk to him.
Back up thirty minutes and Sparkles the Unicorn, just after delivering three pages of mind-blowing hobbit erotica to Milo, has made a beeline for the registration desk to speak with the backup contest manager. Because, you see, Sparkles the Unicorn has heard some disturbing news:
It turns out Hanson Bridges has signed with an agent named Jeremy Jones. And it turns out Sparkles the Unicorn has a recording of a conversation about Hanson Bridges auditioning for a Netflix series.
And that’s a problem. “Aren’t we supposed to be amateurs?” complains Sparkles the Unicorn, using her very best and very sweet unicorn-like voice that is nothing like an aged Judy Garland. And the contest managers are about to let it slide because after all Hanson is a returning National Champion, but it just so happens that on the National Forensics League website there are official rules, and Sparkles the Unicorn just happens to have that website up on her phone and she just happens to casually slide that phone to the backup contest manager.
Who then texts the actual contest manager, who then gets in touch with Joey Sparks, who then gets in touch with Hanson Bridges.
Sparkles the Unicorn is very sad that this is happening and she wishes it didn’t have to happen and then she says she has to go get ready to meet someone very special, and she leaves just as Hanson arrives to go into a private room with some Very Concerned Adults.
And Sparkles smiles as she walks away.
Just as Frodo prepares her own speech, moving into the room vacated by Hanson Bridges, going over the details of her speech the last time—it’s a new speech and she’s trying to learn it by heart and she needs a little bit of uninterrupted time before Hanson returns.
Because, as it turns out, Jeremy Jones does not, in fact, exist. There was no Netflix audition, and Hanson is a big fat liar.
A fact that was discovered two weeks ago after some very involved internet searches.
Hanson, however, has been forced to admit this to the Very Concerned Adults for the better part of five minutes and is off his game when he comes back to the room he thought he was warming up in.
“You didn’t happen to tell anyone about my agent, did you?” asks Hanson.
Frodo is very shocked that this would even be brought up. “No, I would never talk about your agent Jeremy Jones who also reps Kevin Hart who you are very tight with.”
“Good.” Hanson thinks about telling the Frodo the truth, but doesn’t. “Um… right… ’cause I can’t really go into details about that right now ’cause I have to stay an amateur until after this meet.”
“Oh, definitely,” says Frodo, getting the text that lets her know that Hanson has been distracted long enough to put Part B of the plan into motion.
Hanson checks his phone. “Oh shit, I gotta get ready for my performance!” And he rushes out the door, already flustered, and totally not thinking about what’s going to happen to him next.
And Frodo smiles to herself and steps out into the hall—
And right into a guy wearing a badge that said, #941—Andrew Chen.
And that’s when everything fell apart.