If you learn only one lesson from this chapter, let it be this: You can’t take back your communications.
“I didn’t say that.”
(Yes, you did.)
“I didn’t mean that.”
(It’s what they heard.)
“Please ignore my previous communication.”
(Right!)
Whether you say it or you write it, once a message has been sent, it becomes a reflection of who you are. Jumbled, incoherent thoughts and rambling communications make you appear disorganized and ignorant. Typos, poor grammar, or embarrassing word choices make you look sloppy, imprecise, and foolish. The recipient’s feelings of annoyance, frustration, or derision suddenly become the focus rather than the message you really intended to communicate.
No matter what form of communication you use—face-to-face conversation, video chat, e-mail, IM, memo, letter, fax, or telephone—if you satisfy the following four criteria, people will focus on your content and not your inadequacies:
- Is it clear? (Have you said what you intended to say?)
- Is it unified? (Have you stuck to your point?)
- Is it coherent? (Will the communication make sense to the recipient?)
- Is it focused? (Could you have said your piece more succinctly or written it more concisely?)
Unfortunately, with the business world in hyperdrive these days, the clarity, conciseness, unity, and coherence of corporate communications seem to be diminishing. Here is a review of the different mediums used to communicate in today’s fast-paced business world and some tips on how to make the most of them.
In some ways, face-to-face communications are the most difficult of all, while at the same time you have the best chance of success. When you’re talking face-to-face, people can hear and see you.
You have the best chance of your message getting through because you use facial expressions, gestures, and nonverbal cues such as tone of voice and body language. These can enhance your communication and underscore meaning. When you only use your voice, such as when talking on the phone, you lose the benefit of facial expressions and gestures; when you write a note, such as an e-mail, you lose the benefit of vocal expression as well.
Case in point: Bob is slated to give a major presentation to his company’s board of directors. This is it—his chance to shine or to crash and burn. He’s run through his PowerPoint presentation a dozen times already to make sure the equipment operates without a hitch. But he should also make a point-by-point check of his own equipment.
- Is his voice confident and clear or does it quaver from nervousness?
- Does he speak concisely or does he tend to repeat himself three times every time he makes a point?
- Does he speak at a regular pace or does he race through his presentation at ninety miles per hour?
- Is he comfortable with the appropriate lingo or does he mispronounce words?
- Does he move around the room as he talks or does he grip the podium like a vise?
- Does he engage members of the audience with his eyes and with hand and arm gestures, or does he stand like a statue, eyes fixed on his notes?
- Is he dressed appropriately for the occasion? (I once forgot my belt and had to keep my jacket buttoned throughout the presentation.)
Here are some pointers on how to make your face-to-face communications more effective:
Speaking Volume
Shouting your words won’t give your argument more strength. Talk in a conversational tone. If you’re going to use a microphone for a presentation, practice with one ahead of time to give yourself a chance to get used to hearing your own voice amplified.
Tone of Voice
There’s nothing more conducive to putting your audience to sleep than speaking in a monotone. Speaking in an animated voice helps the listener discern the important parts of what you are saying. Your tone of voice can either imply, “I don’t give a hoot about what I’m talking about,” or it can say to your audience, “This is really important—listen up.”
Rate of Speech
Ideally, when speaking to a group, you should talk at the same speed you would use when talking with a friend.
Accent
Normally, a slight accent isn’t a problem. But if your accent is so thick and heavy that people have to strain to understand what you are saying, then you need to work on reducing it. In the meantime, slow your rate of speech and take care to enunciate.
Body Language
How you look is just as important as what you have to say. Through your posture you can either engage the person you are talking with or you can reject him or her completely. Of course, one’s posture alone doesn’t necessarily convey an attitude. On its own, crossing your arms and leaning back might not mean anything. But couple it with a curt tone, a scowling face, or tightly pursed lips, and you can almost guarantee that your listener won’t be particularly receptive to your comments.
The eyes are powerful communicators as well. If you avoid looking someone in the eyes, it may indicate that you feel awkward about his presence or uncomfortable about what you are saying. If you stare too long into someone’s eyes, you may be subtly challenging her authority.
Slouching conveys an impression of laziness or not caring.
The hands-in-pockets posture is more casual, while keeping your hands out of your pockets, perhaps even clasped behind you, projects a more engaged or authoritative image.
Finally, jiggling a foot or knee while sitting can communicate a sense of exasperation, impatience, anxiety, or boredom to the person with whom you are talking.
Think about how frustrated you become when someone uses a phone inappropriately. Here are some suggestions on how to avoid the most egregious telephone errors at the office:
FACE-TO-FACE VS. PHONE CALL. If you’re having a conversation with a person face-to-face, that conversation should always take precedence over a phone call. Use the Do Not Disturb feature and route the call to your voice mail. If you don’t have a Do Not Disturb feature or an answering device, you may have to answer the phone. In this case, tell the caller that you’re busy and will call him back later. One caveat: If you are expecting a call you feel you must take, let the person who is with you know the circumstances in advance and offer to meet with him another time if it would be more convenient.
PLACING SOMEONE ON HOLD. If you put a person on hold, do so for a short period of time—no more than a minute or two at the most. If there’s a problem, get back to him and explain the situation briefly. If you are the one being put on hold and the wait lasts more than three minutes, hang up and call back later. (When you do, try your best not to show your annoyance.)
IDENTIFY YOURSELF. There is nothing more frustrating than getting a call and not knowing to whom you’re speaking. Always start your conversation by identifying yourself: “Hi, Tom, this is Jim Smith at Aerospace”—or, if you know Tom somewhat: “Hi, Tom, this is Jim Smith”—or, if Tom is a good friend: “Hi, Tom, Jim here. How about lunch today?” If someone calls you and doesn’t identify himself, take the first opportunity to say, “Thank you for calling, but I want to be sure who I’m speaking to. You are—?” Don’t assume that caller ID is accurate either. A preemptive “Hi, Serena” could be answered, “No, actually it’s Jake. Serena’s not here right now.” “Uh, sorry…”
MAKE YOUR CALLS YOURSELF. I know I’ll catch flack for this, but I bristle whenever I get a call that starts, “Hello, Mr. Post, this is Thomas, Mr. Jones’s assistant at Aerospace. Mr. Jones would like to speak with you. Can you hold a minute while I get him on the line?” There’s something fundamentally wrong with this picture. Mr. Jones is calling me and now he’s putting me on hold to wait for him. Hey, Mr. Jones, my time is valuable, too. Have the courtesy to make the call yourself and start the conversation on the right foot.
ANSWERING CALLS. Start with a greeting like “hi” or “hello.” Identify the place the person is calling. Adding a brief comment that defines what your company is adds to your company’s branding every time you answer a call. Then give the caller your name and ask how you can help him. Here’s a great example: “Hi, this is Acme Widget Company, maker of the best widgets in the world. This is Bruce. May I help you?”
TRY ANSWERING THE PHONE. If a phone is ringing, don’t always wait for someone else to answer it. “Hi, this is Bill Jones at Aerospace. Can I help you?” Mr. Jones just went up ten notches in my estimation. Here he is, the head honcho, and he’s answering the phone. I know one CEO who takes a regular turn answering calls at his company’s call center. Imagine the pleasant surprise when a person calls with a question or complaint and hears the company’s CEO on the other end of the line. And imagine the attitude of the people who work at the call center, seeing their CEO experiencing firsthand the issues they deal with.
TAKE EFFICIENT MESSAGES. When you take a message for a colleague, write down your name, the date and time of the call, the caller’s name, company, phone number, and a brief reason for the call. Finally, indicate whether your colleague should return the call or if the caller will call back later.
SPEAKERPHONES. Anytime you are going to use the speakerphone feature, let the person on the other end of the line know right away that he or she is on a speakerphone, and then immediately introduce anyone else who is in the room with you. Have each person say “hello” in a clear voice as you introduce them, so that the caller can identify the voices of the different participants.
If you have a speakerphone at your desk in a cubicle or open office area, avoid using it like the plague. It’s hard enough having to listen to people speaking on the phone, but having to hear both sides of a conversation is doubly distracting. In addition, don’t just hit the speaker button, dial, and wait for the phone to be answered before picking up your receiver. Everyone in your area has to listen to the beep, beep, beep of your dialing, the ringing of the phone, and the voice answering the call before you pick up the receiver. Personally, I’d ban speakerphones from open office and cubicle areas. They’re too much of a distraction.
CALL WAITING. Maybe you work at home or in a small office with call waiting rather than multiple phone lines. When you hear that call-waiting beep, ask the person you’re talking to if he or she can hold for just a brief moment. Talk to the new caller only long enough to tell him or her that you’ll have to call back, then return to the first person and complete your conversation. When your call is done, then—and only then—call the second caller back.
ETIQUETTE IMPERATIVE
Telephone Basics
While the person on the other end of the line can’t see you, he or she can hear you. If you’re not careful, the things you do or the sounds you make can range from annoying to downright gross. When you’re talking on the phone:
- Don’t multitask.
- Don’t chew gum or eat.
- Turn off radios, stereos, and other sound devices.
- Don’t sneeze or cough or blow your nose into the receiver.
- Set the receiver down gently.
- Don’t engage in subterfuges like having a colleague listen in on the call unannounced.
- Don’t interrupt someone who is on the phone with someone else.
“We Can Still Hear You”
Conference calls are great, but beware the mute button. Just when you think the call has been muted and you start commenting critically about someone on the other end, you hear a voice over the speaker: “Tom, you probably don’t realize it, but we can still hear you.” Here are some other conference call courtesies:
- Don’t take a call just before the conference call starts. Be sure you can arrive on time.
- Gather everyone in your location in one room if possible so you can at least see each other.
- Be sure to introduce each person so other people on the call can begin recognizing voices.
- Have an agenda and stick to it.
- Ten minutes before the call is meant to end, announce the ten-minute mark so people can begin wrapping up.
- After the call be sure to send out minutes and information on any to-dos as a gentle reminder to participants.
Smile. You’re Live!
Conference calls are a great way to bring a group together while avoiding travel. But they’ve always lacked the personal touch that being able to see the other person brings. Now with video conference calls so easily available, remember, not only can people hear you, they can see you picking your nose, reading the newspaper, whispering to a colleague, or even sleeping. Be alert, be focused, and be engaged just as you would if the people you were meeting with were in the room with you. They are.
Do the person you are calling—and yourself—a favor: leave coherent messages. “Hi, this is Bill Jones at Aerospace. Tom, I’m sorry I missed you. Could you call me back at 555-1212? I’m calling to discuss…”
Keep the description of why you are calling short—two or three sentences at most. Always start your message by stating your name, company, and the number you can be reached at. At the conclusion of the message, repeat your phone number—slowly and clearly. I hate it when a person leaves me a rambling message, tacking on the number only at the bitter end, and then says the number in such a garbled or rushed way that I have to listen to the whole message a second time to get it right.
Cell phones are one of the most useful and one of the most misused tools in business today. The reason is simple: Too many people have lost control of their cell phones. Their thinking goes something like this: “I’ve got to have it on all the time because now I can be reached anytime, anyplace—and I’m so important that people need to be able to reach me anytime, anyplace.” One wonders how we ever survived without cell phones. The answer is: We survived just fine.
Control Your Cell Phone: Turn It Off
For those times when you really need it on, save your coworkers from having to listen to your ringtones by using the Vibrate or Silent Ring feature.
That’s the long and the short of it. Use your cell phone when you need to use it, of course. But leave it on only when you know that you can answer it without disturbing other people. Be careful of abusing the use of your phone for personal calls while at work. They interfere with your job and your boss will notice.
Move to a Private Area
If you use your cell phone for business in a public place, remember that even though you may not know the other people around you, that doesn’t mean your conversation isn’t disturbing them. And don’t even think about talking about confidential or privileged company matters in a public place. Either move to a more private place, or don’t make or take the call. It’s not another person’s job to move away from your conversation—it’s your job to move your conversation away from them.
Texting
Taking personal calls at the office is something colleagues and bosses alike will notice, but text messages are easy to receive silently. You may think that makes exchanging text messages with your friends while you’re at work all right. It’s not. Make your personal calls and read and write your personal text messages during your breaks or while at lunch. When you’re on the clock, focus on your work.
I wish I had a dollar for every inappropriate e-mail that has ever been sent to me. If I did, I’d be a very rich man.
E-mail is a great communication tool. Here are five rules to keep it so:
RULE #1: If you can’t post it on a bulletin board for anyone to read, then don’t send it. I have heard dozens of stories about chagrined e-mail senders who discovered that what they thought was a private communication had become a very public embarrassment—in some cases resulting in lost jobs. Every e-mail is a public document.
RULE #2: Use the Draft or Send Later feature on your e-mail. Proofread and reread every one of your cyber-communications before you send it—because once it’s gone, it’s out there—forever.
RULE #3: Make it easy to read. I recommend using fonts that have serifs—like Times Roman or Garamond—those little extra marks on the ends of some letters. They help the reader to scan the line. Also, avoid using ALL CAPITALS in your e-mails. They are difficult to read and also indicate yelling or projecting anger.
RULE #4: Avoid textspeak and emoticons. Textspeak is the art of abbreviating: CUL8R for “see you later.” In texts and 140-character tweets it makes sense to use them, but if the person reading an e-mail or letter from you has to work at deciphering your message, you’ve failed to communicate. Emoticons should be avoided in formal business e-mails or when writing a person you don’t know well.
RULE #5: Use a salutation. Start your e-mail with “Dear Jim,” just “Jim,” or “Dear Mr. Jacobs.” When writing to a group, use the group name such as Marketing Team or Sales Group. Use a formal title when writing to someone you’ve never met or don’t know well.
Finally, we come to letters and memos: real, physical communications processed on paper or sometimes even handwritten with a pen.
Here’s a weird truth in the e-mail age: These days, real letters delivered through the postal service or by an overnight carrier or hand-carried by a personal courier have become the means of communicating when you want to say, “This is really important,” or “This is really personal,” or when you want to thank someone in the most respectful way possible. Snail mail stands out.