Boston, Massachusetts
10:55 a.m. EDT
Kit wanted to be skin to skin with Castle, to have him inside her.
He took her mouth in a lingering kiss that became more demanding. His embrace was tight and unrelenting. She wondered if he heard the pounding of her heart, beating loud as a drum against her rib cage.
“Kit,” he said huskily, putting one possessive hand on her hip. The other slid to her nape as his lips blazed kisses on her throat and collarbone. The rough scruff on his jaw scratched her skin, the sensation setting every nerve in her body on fire.
His hands worked frantically, stripping the jacket from her shoulders, throwing her shirt over her head, tugging down the front of her bra.
She gasped as the cool air hit her breasts, leaving her exposed.
Immediately, she was self-conscious, but she’d also never been more turned on in her life. “They’re small. Probably smaller than you’re used to.”
“They’re perfect.” Light danced in his eyes. “You’re so fucking beautiful.”
He palmed her breast and took her nipple in his mouth, and she went boneless with anticipation. The arm he had wrapped around her back was the only thing keeping her from melting into a puddle of desire at his feet.
Castle drew his tongue over the tight peak of her breast in a wet, silken caress. He let it slip from his lips only to take the rosy tip greedily again, teasing with his teeth. He licked and sucked. Liquid heat pooled between her legs and she melted against him.
Moaning from the delicious suckle of his mouth, she massaged the hard bulge in his pants, needing to drive him just as wild. She needed to touch his bare skin, strip his clothes off, and have him. Her trembling fingers found his buckle and undid it.
“Maybe we should slow down,” Castle said, his breath ragged.
“Why?”
“It’s been a while since I’ve been with someone and I don’t want to take you in a rush. Not the first time, anyway.”
All the wild and wicked things they could do to each other tumbled through her head. “How much time do we have?”
“Two and a half hours, maybe three before Reaper gets here.”
Plenty of time to savor this. She spun his big body around and nudged him to sit on the bed. Lowering to her knees between his spread legs, she said, “Then let’s slow it down.”
She unlaced his boot and removed it, holding his heated gaze.
He slipped his fingers into her hair and kissed her. It was possessive and hungry, only intensifying her own appetite.
She unlaced and pulled off his second boot and noticed something hidden in the leather upper. “What is this?”
“Universal handcuff key.”
“Oooh. You like it kinky. Where do you keep the cuffs?”
He chuckled. “I’m not into sexual bondage. Unless you want me to be.”
“Hmm.” She slid his thick belt out of the belt loops and a metallic glint caught her eye. A small knife. The blade was sheathed in the leather on the inside of the belt and had a finger loop instead of a handle. Both appeared custom-made and the belt cleverly concealed the knife. No one would have any idea it was there unless they were looking for it.
“That’s new,” he said, eyeing the customized knife. “A little gift from Grace Tanaka. She knows how I like my toys.”
They had vastly different ideas of what constituted a toy. Kit’s were usually battery operated and never failed to give her an orgasm. “Why do you have this stuff hidden in your clothing?”
“I like to be prepared.”
“Of course.” She tossed the boot, dropped the belt, and ran her hands up his muscled thighs to his hips. “I have two questions.”
“Shoot.”
“I get that you’re attracted to me,” she said as he ran his thumb over her nipple and stroked the swell of her breast. “But do you like me?”
She’d slept with her fair share of men, and as it turned out, not many had actually liked her. Was this just a quick physical release? Or, against the odds, had they formed a connection?
Either way, she’d sleep with him. Her feelings ran deeper, and she was hot for him, but she had to know.
“Like is too tame a word. Kit, you overwhelm me,” he said with a raw intensity that rumbled over her skin, as powerful and seductive as the caress of his hands. “I can’t think straight around you. I just want to feel. Enjoy the thrill of you.”
She sighed inside. “You know how to compliment a woman when you want.”
“Before you get to your second question, I have one.”
She nodded. “What?”
“Do you like me? Considering the domestic beer, NRA membership, insane muscles, drinking good bourbon from a red SOLO cup, calluses. And my freight-train personality.”
That was almost verbatim. I must’ve struck a nerve.
“I love that you’re different. The men I’ve been with before ended up being total scum, only interested in using me. You needed something from me too, but I never felt you were only ever after the drives.” He was such a miraculous surprise. “I’m sorry if it came across as an insult. That wasn’t how I meant it. You overwhelm me too.” Good thing that was mutual.
She stood, his gaze following her, and peeled her leggings down, leaving on her barely there panties. Reaching her ankles, she kicked the leggings off.
Those marvelous eyes of his stayed glued to her. No one had ever stared at her with such dark intensity, like he was memorizing every detail.
She cupped his cheeks, tipped her head down, and kissed him for all she was worth. Absorbed the heady flavor of him. So sexy, so male.
His palms skated up the backs of her legs, squeezed her bottom, drawing her so close his hot breath brushed across her through the lacy triangle of her panties.
Crazed butterflies fluttered in her stomach. His mouth on her body, his hands stroking her hair, filled her with a deep, arousing warmth that had her purring.
He gripped the band of her thong and ripped it from her body. She gasped—not from fear but from exhilaration. The promise of pleasure had anticipation vibrating across her skin.
As he kissed the bare curve of her stomach, his palm caressed up her inner thigh to her core. She spread her legs wider, eager and aching. He slid his fingers into her, withdrawing and plunging in again, teasing her sweet spot with the pad of his thumb. She nearly came undone.
A shudder rolled down her spine with every stroke. Close, she was so close, so freaking fast. He licked her nipple, sucking on it, and then his mouth moved lower, his tongue replacing his thumb against that sensitive bundle of nerves between her legs. He drew on her with tenderness and mind-boggling talent she’d never experienced. A swirl of wet caresses, a thrusting invasion in tandem with his fingers sent her sailing over the edge.
“That’s right, Kit-Kat. Come for me.”
Her hands flew to his shoulders, her nails digging into his skin as she cried out, falling apart in his arms. She shuddered in surrender, her inner muscles squeezing his fingers.
“I can’t wait to feel you clamp down like that around my cock.” His voice was low and rough as he held her.
Limp in his arms, she clung to him. It was no shocker he was skilled, but she was overwhelmed by how unselfish and sweet he’d been. Not to mention great at dirty talk.
She took his face in her hands and kissed him. Need crashed through her, hot and hungry.
“Castle.” She could barely get the words out, her lungs expanding with excitement and an awful longing. But she had to tell him. “I want you inside me.”
“You sure your heart can handle all this?”
Apprehension twisted her stomach. She wasn’t quite sure, but not from a medical perspective. Castle had gotten to her, broken through her defenses, and grabbed hold of a part of her no one had ever touched. Maybe her subconscious was trying to fill the void left from everything she’d lost, maybe it was the loneliness, but she feared his effect on her ran deeper.
“I can handle whatever you dish out, arrogant bastard,” she said.
A ghost of a smug smile settled on his lips. “You like my arrogance. Admit it.”
She didn’t like it. She loved it, loved everything about his big, confident personality that matched his big, imposing body. “I like your arrogance about as much as you like mine.”
“Once again, like is too tame.”
They tumbled onto the bed, rolling and kissing. Her head spun, her heart inflated with an unbearable lightness, but Castle anchored her.
All her previous sexual encounters had been a clumsy, hot mess of knocked heads, an accident of some kind, chipped tooth once, or premature blastoff on the guy’s part.
But this was smooth and fluid, not a beat missed.
His holstered gun hit the nightstand. She tore off his clothes, desperate to shed every piece. He licked and sucked wherever he pleased. Urgency bounced off the walls, their frenzied hands groping and exploring, their ravenous mouths tasting the buffet of exposed skin, had her ready to combust.
The heavy muscles curving his arms and torso were so chiseled and defined. His scars, even the lick of tattoos, were evidence of the hell he’d fought through and survived. Every inch of him was something from a fantasy. It was a pity more women didn’t get to experience his magnificence, but she wasn’t inclined to share.
She slid her hand past his stomach, lower. Her fingers found his enormous erection, hard and throbbing. Holy Christ. His size would’ve made any woman’s breath hitch. She cupped his thick shaft, filling her palm, and stroked him.
“God,” he hissed.
Running her thumb over the engorged crown, she watched his eyes roll into the back of his head as he groaned.
She relished having the power to excite him but couldn’t wait any longer. “Fuck me.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
He reached for his pants and fished out his wallet. There was the crinkle of foil when he tore open the condom wrapper. He pushed her legs wider with his body, settling on top of her. She almost asked him to wait, to let her taste him, but she needed him somewhere else right now.
Desire beat through her like an animate, breathing thing. The idea of being his, even only for a moment, fired up her blood and made her entire body quiver.
He was chiseled steel between her legs, hot as a brand. With a guttural growl, he eased himself inside her, giving her a chance to adjust. Then he withdrew just as slowly and rubbed the head of his shaft along the seam of her entrance, against her swollen clit, driving her wild.
A rush of slick heat spread between her thighs, a desperate cry dancing on her lips. He filled her with one heavy, hard thrust. She bucked her hips in urgent response, seeking friction. A carnal instinct took over. He pumped into her with a hard, driving rhythm—each intense stroke a question that demanded an answer.
Yes, she trusted him. Completely.
“You okay, Kit-Kat?”
Emotions tightened her throat. “Never better. Don’t stop.” The fullness, the closeness, was everything.
He pushed into her. Any discomfort distilled into a delicious, pulsing sensation in her core. The sweet, rolling friction was hot and smooth, letting the tension inside her build. Her muscles trembled. Her mind blanked. There was only Castle, this heat.
The man’s stamina was incredible, a testament to the effort he put into his honed physique. The only thing more remarkable was his self-control.
His features pinched like this was killing him. “You feel so good,” he said.
She hummed her agreement.
He crushed his mouth to hers, swallowing the sound from her. Their tongues tangled in a dirty, wet caress that had her wrapping herself around him, pulling him closer.
They were locked together. Sweat misted their skin. His eyes opened and captured hers, his pace increasing with each labored breath.
She usually hated eye contact during sex, preferring to forget whoever she was fucking and focus entirely on having an orgasm. But the intimacy of that look with Castle while he rocked into her as deeply as possible filled a hollowness inside her.
His hands dove underneath her. Castle lifted her leg, setting her ankle on his shoulder. His arm hugged her thigh and his other hand clutched her hip, holding her against his thrusts. He drove deeper, turning her mythical G-spot into reality, his pelvis grinding against her clit in a way that she would’ve paid for. She was losing herself, splintering around him.
The air thickened. Pleasure boiled over in violent, almost painful waves that she thought might kill her. Every muscle, every sensitized nerve coiled tight as a fist and she came, muttering gibberish.
His control snapped, all finesse evaporated, as if he’d been waiting for her. He pumped harder, faster.
Next time, she’d tell him not to hold back. She gripped his marvelous ass, urging him on.
He slammed deep, his powerful body stretched taut over her, and shoved his face in the side of her neck. She memorized the moment he surrendered and unraveled.
“Kit.” Her name was a strained whisper against her throat.
He settled on top of her, pinning her to the bed with his full weight.
Throbbing with sweet aftershocks, she could barely breathe with his body limp on her, but she didn’t want him to move.
First-time sex with someone was usually awkward and fast.
That was off-the-charts perfect. Best sex of my entire life.
“Wow.” He rolled off her carefully and tugged her body into the cradle of his arms.
“You took the word from my lips.” She nestled her head on his shoulder, her arm draped over his rock-solid abdomen. Even his sweat was sexy.
She always wanted to remember this, the satisfaction of being in his arms, like his affection was enough. So that when this thing between them ended and the loneliness gnawed at her in the cold darkness, she’d at least have the memory of his warmth to comfort her.
Or torture her.
God, she prayed for the former.
Either way, she got the sense this was going to change things. But she didn’t want to think about that. No man had ever made her come so hard, much less repeatedly. Once wasn’t enough. Then again, how much would be? One week of this? One month? A year?
She nuzzled his cheek, taking in the delicious scent of him, her knee propped on his thigh, her sex pressed to his hip.
Unbelievable. Simply being snuggled close to him had her practically on the verge again.
Smiling, she pushed herself up on an elbow. Her fingers traced the lines of sleek muscle on his abdomen, over his solid chest, up his neck to his incredible jaw.
“Did you get it out of your system?” she asked, staring down at him.
The look of contentment on his face shifted, his gaze shuttering as he considered her question for a protracted moment. She’d only been teasing him, but now she regretted letting her mouth somehow spoil things.
His brows furrowed like he was deep in thought, wading through a river of worry. “No. I’m afraid I didn’t.” He threw the covers aside and put his feet to the floor. With his back to her, he sat there for a few uneasy beats before he went to the bathroom.
Dread congealed in her throat. She sat up, bringing her knees and the sheet to her chest.
The toilet flushed. The water ran. Her mind spun.
Castle left the bathroom. He came to her side of the bed and sat on the edge, a someone-just-died look on his face.
A sickening sensation clenched inside her gut. “What’s wrong?”
“I care about you. And I still want you. More than I did before.”
That should’ve been a good thing, but she saw the conflict stretched across his face and hardening his eyes.
Every time he took a chance on her, chose to trust and protect her despite her mistakes, he’d made her believe in honor and chivalry. In the possibility of love. Each kiss and caress had healed a little of the damage inflicted by the men before, the Jaspers and Lennys.
All of them an overture to Castle.
She wasn’t foolish enough to think they’d have more than a few days together. Then he’d be done with this assignment, with her, and be off on another mission. But she wanted those days. The heat of his body tangled with hers, soothing something inside them both.
She wasn’t ready to lose him. Not yet. Maybe not ever.
Kit slid an arm around his neck and pressed her lips to his. He didn’t kiss her back. Both with their eyes open, staring at the other.
For a few agonizing seconds, she was frozen.
But the look that surfaced in his eyes shredded her.