While Frank peered through the telescope, Nicholas and I stayed in our chairs, shining our flashlights on each corner of the backyard to keep watch for werewolves.
“Sure is dark out here,” I said. “Even with that full moon. Maybe I should go ask Dad to turn on the patio light.”
“I won’t be able to see as well,” Frank said. “And keep those flashlights still, will you? Every time I see a light bouncing off of the grass, I think it’s coming from a UFO up there.”
“Well, what are we supposed to do, then?” Nicholas asked. “Just sitting around is boring.”
Frank picked up the Super-Secret Spy Notebook off of my lap and turned to the next blank page. “Here,” he said, handing it to Nicholas. “Make a map of the sky for us to use. Like a grid or something. That way we can keep track of any spots that seem suspicious. Right now I’m focusing on that top left corner.” He pointed to an area of the sky that was more toward the back of the yard, although wasn’t the entire sky the top? “When we switch, you’ll take top middle, and then Danny can scan top right. Then we’ll move to the middle section of the sky. Make sense?”
“You’ve put a lot of thought into this,” Nicholas said.
“You can’t catch aliens without a plan,” I pointed out.
Frank nodded.
“Yeah, okay,” Nicholas agreed.
I shined my flashlight on the notebook while Nicholas drew the grid. It kind of reminded me of a tic-tac-toe game. He drew an X in the top left square.
At first, I thought Nicholas was marking off the spot where Frank had his telescope pointed so we’d know he had that part of the sky covered. But then he handed the notebook and pencil to me. Nicholas was right—it was boring just sitting here. So I drew an O in the bottom right square. Nicholas totally fell for it and put his next X directly under his first one. I made my move, putting an O in the bottom left square.
Frank turned around just as Nicholas was about to mark his next X. “What are you two doing?” He seemed pretty annoyed.
“I told you,” Nicholas said. “We’re bored.”
“Fine.” Frank grabbed the notebook out of my hands and stood next to Nicholas’s chair. He drew a second grid and put a giant check mark in one of the boxes. “Top left is all clear. Go ahead and scope out top middle.”
“Finally,” Nicholas said. He jumped up and walked over to the telescope. “Whoa, you can see everything! Stars and planets and the moon and—hey, I see something moving. I really do!”
Frank threw my Super-Secret Spy Notebook into my lap and ran over. I ran over too, but I held the book close to my chest. It wasn’t something you could just throw around.
“Let me see!” Frank shouted and shoved Nicholas over.
“Hey,” Nicholas yelled. “It’s my turn! You’re just supposed to mark it off on the grid, remember?”
Frank ignored him and looked through the telescope. “I don’t see anything,” he said. “And you’re not even pointed at top middle. We had a plan.”
“You mean you had a plan,” Nicholas said. “Anyway, it’s a good thing I wasn’t only on top middle ’cause I would’ve missed it.”
“Missed what?” Frank snapped. “Your made-up spaceship?”
“It wasn’t made up!” Nicholas’s voice grew louder and angrier. “It was there. It was round and had lights all around that spun as it moved.”
“Let me see!” I demanded. I put the notebook carefully on the chair. “I haven’t even had a turn yet.”
Frank moved to the side. “Go ahead. But there’s nothing there.” He scowled at Nicholas and repeated, “Nothing.”
“I know what I saw!” Nicholas yelled. “It was going like a million miles an hour—that’s why it was gone so fast.” He took a step closer to Frank and clenched his fists by his side. “You’re just mad ’cause you didn’t see it first. You have to catch it at exactly the right millisecond.” He stood up straight and puffed out his chest. “And I did.”
Frank tightened his fists too.
“Cut it out!” I pushed my body between the two of them.
Before either of them could make another move, the patio light went on, and the back door opened. Frank and Nicholas backed away from each other.
“Snacks, anyone?” Mom walked out carrying a tray and placed it on the small patio table. “Can’t be on an alien watch without popcorn. And I brought you hot cocoa too. It’s starting to get a little chilly out here.”
“Thanks, Mrs. Wexler.” Frank walked over to where she stood.
“Yeah, thanks.” Nicholas followed, his voice now back to normal.
“See anything good?” Mom asked.
“Maybe,” I answered, hoping Nicholas and Frank wouldn’t start fighting again.
They didn’t say a word.
“Well,” she said, taking her tray back after putting the bowls and cups on the table, “I won’t keep you from your fun.” She walked back inside.
“Let’s say that was a spaceship,” Frank began. He shoveled popcorn in his mouth and took a big gulp of hot chocolate without even testing it first to make sure it wasn’t too hot.
“It was a spaceship,” Nicholas insisted.
“That’s what I said.” Frank tossed another handful of popcorn in his mouth and kept talking. “What if it was staking out the area but saw the light from the flashlights, knew someone was watching for it, and set its engine to supersonic turbo so it could vanish faster than a blink of an eye? That could explain why only Nicholas saw it.”
“Exactly.” Nicholas threw a huge handful of popcorn in his mouth too. “A million miles an hour, just like I said.”
“But why was it over my backyard?” I scanned the area nervously. “Is it ’cause Mr. Schneider told them about me, and they’re planning on taking me next?” I knew I should have been nicer to him. “M-maybe we should go inside.”
“Nah,” Frank said. “Mr. Schneider’s already had plenty of chances to grab you. No offense, but I don’t think he’s interested.”
In a strange way, I was kind of offended. I also wasn’t 100 percent certain that I believed Frank.
“Actually, I think the UFO was out searching for Mr. Schneider,” Nicholas said. “You know, so it could zap him back up.”
“Yeah, you’re probably right,” Frank agreed. “I’ll bet he’s still out here somewhere ’cause he was trying to find food for that Irish kid. Except now the spaceship is gone, so Mr. Schneider is stuck here, hanging around.”
I brought my Super-Secret Spy Notebook over to the table.
8. Mr. Schneider needs to get back on UFO.
“And there’s a full moon,” Nicholas said, his eyes rising toward the sky. “I wonder . . .”
“What do you wonder?” I already knew, but I was hoping he was going to say something other than that Mr. Schneider had turned into a full werewolf.
“I wonder if . . .” He stopped talking because the bushes along the side of the house began to rustle. We all looked over. I held my breath.
“Probably a squirrel,” Frank whispered.
The bushes shook again. That was either a huge family of squirrels or a single giant one. I reached for one of the flashlights but realized they were all still next to the chairs out by the telescope. I squinted, trying to see across the dark yard. The rustling stopped. And I let out my breath.
“Anyway,” Frank continued, “if the spaceship was searching for Mr. Schneider, maybe it’ll come back. Let’s finish our stakeout.” He headed back to the middle of the yard where our chairs and telescope were set up. Nicholas and I stayed close behind him.
“ROARRRRR!” From out of the bushes hurtled a body—humanlike with legs and arms, wearing a dark coat, but with the head of a wolf—furry with red eyes and pointy teeth. Behind it, another body, also in a dark coat—this one with a green head, four huge bloody eyeballs, and long silver antennae. They waved their arms as they ran around the yard screaming.
Nicholas, Frank, and I screamed too, nearly knocking each other over as we raced to get to the back door. I didn’t even have time to grab my Super-Secret Spy Notebook, which broke the most important rule of being a Super-Secret spy.
All the backyard lights came on. Dad swung the door open. “What is going on out here?” he yelled.
“It’s Mr. Schneider!” I cried. “He’s here with one of the other aliens! Quick, let us in!”
I tried to push through the doorway, but Dad just stood there blocking my path. He shook his head and seemed totally annoyed. Behind me, the sound of familiar laughter erupted. I spun around. Alice stood doubled over with her friend Terri, the two of them cackling. In Alice’s hand was a rubber wolf mask, and in Terri’s, a green rubber Martian mask.
“That wasn’t funny!” I screamed.
“Oh, it really is,” Alice said, barely able to catch her breath.
“No, it isn’t.” Mom now stood in the doorway too, arms crossed. She seemed annoyed like Dad, but she also looked like she might cry. “I nearly called 9-1-1.” She turned to Alice’s friend. “Terri, does your mom know you’re here?”
“No, Mrs. Wexler.” She kept her head low. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s not me you should be apologizing to.”
Normally, I’d kill for an apology from Alice and Terri, but my heart was beating so loudly that I couldn’t even hear their words.
Mom made Terri leave and sent Alice to her room. Then she turned to us. “Maybe it’s time to wrap up the stargazing for tonight, boys. Why don’t you bring everything inside? You can watch television until it’s time for bed.”
She didn’t have to ask me twice. And I was glad she left all the lights on out back until we were done. I’d had enough white-van-werewolf-Bermuda-Triangle-UFO-alien hunting for one night.