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The rain turned into fat, slushy drops as the temperature dipped. Tamryn slept. He held his breath occasionally, waiting to hear that she was still breathing. At one point, he woke her up and helped her put on all the extra clothes in her pack. It was so cold, though, he worried that the extra clothing wouldn’t be enough. All he could think of was how Em had died, her skin pale, bleached of color. She shouldn’t have left him that night. It was all his fault.
Carefully, so he wouldn’t disturb Tamryn or the fawn, Nolan lifted off the sleeping bag and laid the portion he’d been sitting on over Tamryn’s lap. She sighed in her sleep and resettled against his shoulder.
He listened for danger. He listened to the rain and the wind. He listened to Tamryn’s breathing, to her heartbeat.
And he listened to his own fears, replaying like nightmares in his mind. Em’s silence. The crunch of snow beneath his running feet.
Tamryn wasn’t his. He couldn’t claim her, even though his inner polar bear was going crazy with the need.
She belongs to someone else, he told himself.
But she’d felt, for a little while, like his. She’d come against his hand, her tight pussy squeezing his finger, her breathy moans filling his ears, her cinnamon candy scent filling his nostrils.
Irritated with himself, he adjusted his pants where his dick was currently pressing, frustrated and hard.
Now he was turned on and afraid at once. Winning combo. Good job, Nolan, he thought sarcastically.
Eventually, the storm passed. The rain slowed. His cock relaxed, finally understanding it wouldn’t be used anytime soon.
A little before dawn, he wrapped both arms around Tamryn and threw one of his legs over hers, careful not to kick the fawn. It was the only way he knew to ensure Tamryn was warm enough, and she didn’t complain about his weight covering her. Satisfied, for the moment, that she wouldn’t die in her sleep, he dozed.
*
HE WOKE ALONE, THE space beside him cold. Tamryn was gone. Even the fawn was missing. He sat up, surprised. How had she gotten away from him without waking him?
Cocking his head to the side, he listened to the forest. If Tamryn was walking, she made no sound at all. The sun shone, although it was weak through patchy clouds. He stood up and sniffed the air, searching for the scent of Red Hot candies.
She’d gone east, so he headed that way.
He passed the fawn, who was currently absorbed in the task of nibbling an entire shrub clean of its greenery. He hadn’t gone more than twenty extra yards before he stopped in his tracks, struck by the beauty in front of him.
Tamryn sat on a rock, fully nude, in a patch of sunlight. Her eyes were closed, her face blank. Behind her was a pond, water trickling into it from the rocky face of the mountain above them.
She was trying to call her dragon, he could tell.
Something about their conversation last night seemed to have sparked new motivation in her. She was brave to do this, after everything she and her family had been through. He understood, now, her reluctance.
He hurried over to her, then paused. What if she didn’t want company?
“Join me,” she said softly.
“You sure?” he asked.
Without opening her eyes, she patted the stone next to her.
He stripped off his clothes, his gaze on Tamryn the whole time. Something had changed for her during the night. Whereas before she’d seemed a little scared, a little insecure, now she was acting comfortable in her own skin.
It was a gorgeous sight to behold.
He sat down quietly, reverently, next to the edge of the rock that jutted over the water. Behind them was a steep drop going straight into the lake.
“Have you called your dragon forward?” he asked.
“Not yet. But she’s there. I can sense her. After so much time pushing her away, I’m surprised she’s responding to me at all.”
He closed his eyes, being quiet alongside her. He didn’t know what she needed from him, if anything, but it soothed his unquiet soul to be with her in this way. Several minutes passed, where they sat together, breathing in the forest.
After a little while, Tamryn spoke. “How does it work when you shift? What do you do, what do you see?”
He thought about it for a moment. “I don’t see anything, really. I just reach for the bear, and my body does the work. It was harder when I was younger, but now it’s almost subconscious. I don’t have to think about it at all.”
“That’s hardly fair,” she said.
“You’ll get it, don’t worry. Can you picture yourself as a dragon? Maybe flying over the lake?” He peeked over at her.
“No,” she said, shaking her head. The brilliant red of her hair shone in the sun. He wanted to take a lock of it in his fingers, feel its softness. “My father could do it. Everything came easily to him, from fighting, to battle strategies...”
She trailed off, and Nolan got the impression it might be hard for her to think of her father. Then again, sometimes talking about painful things could help.
“He was good to you?” Nolan asked.
“Oh, very. He was the best father I could’ve had. He was so patient, even when I was small and fidgeted during the lessons he gave me.”
“He gave you lessons?”
“Battles, primarily. How dragons fight in the air and on land. I wasn’t always a good student.”
“What would he advise you now?” Nolan asked.
“He’d advise me to work on envisioning my dragon. Probably, as you said, flying over the lake. But I feel as that’s all I’ve been doing for the past hour.”
“Let’s close our eyes and try to picture that,” he said. “Just one more time.”
She gave a huff of impatience and wrinkled her nose at him. Her eyes opened and she said, “I’m ready to be finished with this exercise.”
“Come on,” he said. “One more try? Let’s close our eyes.”
Without waiting for her agreement, he shut his eyes and tried to lead by example. Then he felt her hands on his shoulders. He reached up to touch her, but before he could grasp her wrists, she shoved him, hard. His eyes shot open and he saw the underside of the rock he’d just been sitting on, and Tamryn leaning over the edge, grinning.
Cold water enveloped him as he hit the lake with a loud smack. It stung like a fucker. He kicked through the freezing water to swim to the surface and came up cussing.
Tamryn was still watching him, laughing.
He smiled back. “The water’s great. You should come in, too. There must be some kind of hot spring or something.”
“I applaud your attempt to fool me, Mr. Marks, but I can sense lies just as well as any other shifter. However, I could use a bath.” She crouched on the lip of the rock, then jumped.
Her splash soaked Nolan again, but he didn’t mind. She swam over to him and treaded water, her eyes on his. The water darkened her bright hair, turning it into a rich auburn sheet that plastered itself to her head and neck.
He had to kiss her. He shot out a hand and grabbed her arm, yanking her to him. She gasped, then laughed. He kissed away her giggles and swam closer to the shore where he could touch the bottom of the lake. Tamryn watched his face with wide eyes. All he could think about was holding her, making her feel good.
With the soles of his feet grounded in dirt and rock, he kissed Tamryn, pouring everything he was, everything he hoped to be into the kiss.
She held his shoulders, tugging him closer, rubbing her slippery, wet legs against his. It would be so easy to take her here, now, to slide inside her wet heat and bring them both to the joy they so desperately wanted to give each other. He grabbed her ass with one hand, tugging her closer. His cock pressed against her lower stomach and he groaned.
“I want you,” he said. “So bad.” Then he tasted her lips again.
She moaned and rubbed against his chest, her nipples stiff against his skin. With a gasp, she pulled back. “I want you too much,” she said.
They stared at each other, breathing hard.
“You think we should get going,” he said.
She nodded. “I don’t want to.”
“Illary said you had a duty to fulfill.”
“I do.” She looked down and away from him.
Taking her hand, he led her to the shore of the lake, away from the water and their real-life dream.