- Gaia and Uranus -

Gaia

Does this pic make me look round?

Uranus likes this.

REPLY

Uranus: Loving the curves! #SwipeRight

Uranus

Uranus has updated his profile photo. #Skyselfie #Nofilter

Gaia likes this.

REPLY

Gaia: Wishing on a that someone would HMU.

Gaia

Gaia and Uranus are now married.

REPLY

Gaia

OMG, 12 children. We need EVERYTHING. Including a reality show!

Uranus likes this.

REPLY

Uranus: We will literally have to use ALL the names in the baby book.

Gaia: I’m thinking Theia, Rhea, Themis, Mnemosyne, Phoebe, and Tethys for the girls. And Oceanus, Koios, Krios, Hyperion, Iapetus, and Kronos for the boys.

Uranus: Ok. What will we call the boys as a group? Something MANLY.

Gaia: How about the Titans?

Uranus: I can live with that. And we can call the girls the Titanettes! No, the Titanelles! No, the Titanesses! Yeah.

Gaia: Titanesses. Really?

Uranus: Impossible to make fun of. Like Uranus.

Gaia: Lol, yeah. Hopefully they grow up to be exactly like you.

Uranus: Well, not exactly like me. If they become 2 strong, I’ll have to kill them, LOL.

Gaia

Three more babies! Brontes, Steropes, and Arges. We’ll call them the Cyclopes.

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Uranus: What’s up with these 3? Something looks off. Not sure what, tho….

Gaia: Srsly?

Uranus: Don’t tell me—is it their hair color???

Gaia: They each have only 1 eye in the middle of their forehead.

Uranus: BABE, I TOLD YOU NOT TO TELL ME! But yeah, that’s totally it. What did I name them again?

Gaia: Lightning, Thunder, and Thunderbolt.

Uranus: Lol, yeah, I think I was a little drunk when I came up with the 3rd one. But it’s OK. I hate them. LOL

Uranus

Babe. Why does the receipt say you bought 3 coats, 150 hats, and 300 mittens?

Gaia

I just gave birth again.

Uranus

I thought that was water weight?!

Gaia

Sigh. 70% of my surface is water. I had 3 babies. We’re going to call them the Hekatonkheires. Their names are Briares, Kottos, and Gyes.

Uranus

UGH. That’s going to remind me of Gyes from work. You know I hate that guy.

Gaia

I gave birth to EIGHTEEN babies. You will deal with a name you don’t like.

Uranus

Fine. But why so many hats and mittens?

Gaia

Each has 50 heads.

Uranus

WHAT

Gaia

And 100 arms.

Uranus

THAT’S IT. I’m sending these 3 freaks AND the last 3 weirdos to Tartarus.

Gaia

Absolutely not! You can’t send them to that pit of despair.

Uranus

2 late.

Gaia

FML.

Group text: Gaia, Oceanus, Hyperion, Koios, Krios, Iapetus, Kronos

Gaia

Titans, listen up. Your dad is driving me nuts. Can 1 of u pls kill him? THX. Love you!

Oceanus

Not it.

Hyperion

Not it.

Koios

Not it.

Krios

Not it.

Iapetus

Not it.

Kronos

Ugh. Fine, I’ll do it. But u guys owe me!

Kronos

Guess there’s a new in town. KRONOS FTW. #RIPUranus #Overthrow­Back­Thursday

Gaia likes this.

REPLY

Group text: Cyclopes, Hekatonkheires, Kronos

Cyclopes

Kronos, can u pls free us from Tartarus now?

Hekatonkheires

Yeah, and us too?

Kronos

Not rite now. Busy.