The Lost Blogs

Subject: A Pretty Astounding Day

My previous entries concerning the burning bush and the locusts that descended upon Egypt can be read here and here. The reason behind mentioning such writings now is only so that you may fully grasp the majesty that is the Lord in the next story I wish to share with all of you.

Please bear with me, children, as I am sending this entry from my holy portable communication device—so punctuation and proper grammar may fail me. May the Lord forgive any of my shortcomings.

The Free the Slaves of Egypt Webring, which continues to function as I communicate with you today, has previously mentioned the plight of the Jewish people. You have read about the ten plagues and yesterday’s mass exodus out of Egypt. Today I moblog to you from the other side of the Red Sea.

Yes, my children—you heard correctly. The other side of the Red Sea.

I stood before God’s waters with hundreds of thousands of our people by my side. The Egyptians, as previously mentioned in yesterday’s entry, were closing in on us. There was no place to go. We were trapped.

Yet my faith in the Lord transformed the situation from hopeless to hope-filled.

Without warning, God caused the waters to part for the people of Israel. I took a few pictures with my holy portable communication device, which includes a holy eye that can collect images which can be viewed here. The quality is not the best, but if you just feel one-half of the wonder that I felt—you will understand the feeling that swept the crowd. There’s a close-up shot of me here waving at the Egyptians as they drowned in the rapidly filling sea. (You may not be able to fully see this in the pictures, that’s why I must mention that once we were all safely across, the waters began to fill back in. It was a glorious moment.)

Now free of our bonds and of the Egyptians, we will make our way to Israel. I may not be posting as often over the next few weeks, as I must conserve my holy communication device’s holy life of battery power for the important moments.

If you’re looking for something to read while I’m gone, please check out Pharaoh’s Blog, which will, I’m quite sure, contain some fairly amusing observations about yesterday’s incident involving me and the chosen people of Israel.