It’s strange having dinner with a boy when you’re naked and twenty feet tall.

I lay across the floor in front of the pulpit, as long as a pew but too wide to lie on one. Heck, my hips were so big, I couldn’t even fit between the pews to sit in the aisle anymore. Lear was sitting on the floor, eating a sandwich, Pan-Cake curled up in his lap. Beth was still working on my gown, so all I had was Frank, the comforter Creation, draped over my body like a bath towel.

My long limbs shifted around, trying to look as appealing as I could with my new proportions. But I kept banging my shin on the altar and nearly knocking over the pulpit. Growing up, I’d always felt like I was only allowed to take up a certain amount of space. And that my body was always betraying that. It didn’t help that I compared myself to Ma, whose voluptuous form seemed to take up the exact right amount of space at all times.

But this new body of mine . . . well, it was just ridiculous. Comical even. If Lear didn’t like me as I was, what was I going to do? Go on a diet and grow as skeletal as Ook? Lear could even call me by my old nickname “Beefy” and I wouldn’t bat an eyelash.

My limbs shifted again, more carefully this time. I kept waiting for him to sneak a peek at my shape under the comforter, but his eyes remained fixed on his sandwich. We were having our usual engaging conversation of slurps, sighs, and silent pauses when Marsh came in the back door sweating and carrying a shovel. He didn’t see Lear sitting behind my giant hips.

“The community garden has never been healthier,” Marsh said, pulling off his work gloves. “I have been telling people the fertilizer came from the elephants at the carnival.”

Now that I was a giantess, my stomach had much farther to fall. I cleared my throat so loud it rattled the stained glass and got Marsh’s attention. With my eyes I promised to throw him over the church if he breathed another word about the fertilizer.

“You have a guest.” Marsh’s nostrils flared at Lear like he was a skunk that may or may not have had its sacs removed. “You are Lear Finley, correct?”

“Yes, sir.”

“I have not seen you in my congregation.”

“I can’t leave Mother alone too long,” Lear said.

“What is the matter with her?” Marsh asked

Lear flinched and studied the ground. “When I was young, she—my dad, he—”

“She saved Lear from a fire when he was little,” I interrupted, spinning a story from nothing at all. “Lear’s dad didn’t make it out, and her lungs haven’t been right since. If Lear doesn’t keep a close eye on her, she could choke.”

Lear kept his eyes on the ground.

“I see,” Marsh said. He took out his keys and headed toward the front door. “I must purchase some pipe cleaner for the organ.” He paused at the entrance. “I do not imagine you can get up to any, em, fornicating in your current state?”

My face practically caught fire. I could see actual heat waves wafting off my cheeks. I didn’t dare look at Lear.

“I did not think so,” Marsh said.

The church door shut behind him.

If the reverend couldn’t think up any sins between me and Lear, what chance did I have?

I lifted a fruit can to my lips and nearly knocked the pulpit over with my elbow, barely managing to catch it. My limbs were so long now, they were starting to feel like they didn’t belong to me. My body felt like a tractor that could bring down the entire church if I didn’t navigate it right.

“This is the last of the food,” Lear said.

“Oh.”

I looked over the rest of the food, half the amount he’d brought on other nights. My stomach suddenly felt so hollow I feared there was no bottom. I emptied a box of uncooked Kraft Macaroni & Cheese into my mouth, hoping the crunch would hide my panic.

Lear rubbed his eye with the palm of his hand. “My mom’s gonna have a stroke if she finds out it’s all gone. This was supposed to last us a year. She’s terrified the world could end any minute.”

I wished I could promise him it wasn’t. But with me hiding in this church, Daddy’s eyes were probably starting to glaze over again.

“I’m sorry,” I said. “I’m still gonna pay you back. Promise.”

Lear sighed, frustrated. “Why won’t you tell me how you got big?”

“I don’t know. It’s all so confusing and scary. I don’t want to put you in any danger.”

Lear lifted Pan-Cake off his lap and set her aside. “I better go.”

I sat up, pinning Frank to my chest. “Will you still visit me tomorrow night? We could take another trip to the water tower after everyone’s asleep. Bet I could climb that ladder in three steps now.”

“Maybe,” he said.

The locusts hummed at the edge of my vision. It seemed the bigger I grew the more often they visited. That afternoon Beth had brought another gown, and just by bending forward, I had sent a rift straight up the back, mooning stained-glass Jesus. I was so frustrated I wanted to kick a hole right through the side of the church and keep on kicking until all of Pennybrooke was nothing more than rubble.

“It’s fine,” Beth had said, touching my knee, her fingers scabbed over from sewing. “I didn’t like the cut of this one anyway.”

Beth wasn’t here to calm me now. And I didn’t want Lear to leave. The bigger I got, the lonelier I became. It already felt like an eternity of waiting between Marsh in the morning, Beth in the afternoon, and Lear at night.

And time was growing short for my first kiss.

What would keep him around? What would get him to open up? What could I do to make him look not so terrified all the time?

“Wait,”I told Lear. “Don’t leave yet.”

To gain some courage, I grabbed a pudding cup, the size of a thimble in my fingers, peeled off the tin lid, and squeezed the tapioca in a single drip onto my tongue.

“I think I like you, Lear,” I said. “I’ve never really liked someone before, and it scares me something fierce just saying this out loud, especially because I’m so big now and not that great to look at, but there you have it.”

Lear’s forehead unwrinkled a bit. My heart sped up. Now that I’d finished talking, all that was left was a dusty silence. Lear stared at his feet.

“Anyway,” I said, “I wouldn’t blame you if you ran right out of this church and never looked back. But I also wouldn’t blame you if you decided to kiss me before my lips are much too big for kissing.”

Lear wavered. My heart leapt. And then he was gone. Down the aisle, out the door, and into the night.

The church creaked in his absence. “When I said I wouldn’t blame you for running, I didn’t think you’d take it so seriously,” I said to nobody. Then I sighed. “Guess I’d run too.”

The church door fell shut, and fear overtook my body. I tried to drown it with a bucket of rehydrated milk.

•  •  •

That night, I paced up and down the aisle in the fading light of the stained glass. My footsteps thundered, making Pan-Cake tremble in the corner. It was hard to breathe. My skin was covered in sweat. My insides felt hollow, like my body could collapse in on itself if I didn’t eat in the next five minutes.

I considered venturing out to the grocery store, breaking the doors down, and stuffing myself silly. But people didn’t take kindly to things my size. What if I was caught? What if the people of Pennybrooke tied me down and locked me up? What if they shot me?

My feet traversed the length of the church in three strides and back again as my thoughts alternated between food and Lear. Locusts swarmed around Jesus’s eyes. I wasn’t like one of those silly girls on TV who got all loosey-goosey about love. But maybe now that my heart was five times its size, it was easier for romance to slip inside. I could sure go for a dozen Salisbury steak TV dinners right about then. I’d finally admitted to someone that I liked him, truly liked him, and he couldn’t get away from me fast enough. Then again, what did I expect when I could eat twice his body weight in food? If those stained-glass lambs were real, I’d cut open their throats and eat them raw.

Spinning to head back down the aisle, I banged my ankle against a pew. I collapsed to the floor and sucked through my teeth so hard it made a couple of choral books fly open, pages fluttering.

“ARG!” I said in a voice I barely recognized as my own.

Outside, dogs barked. I clamped my hands over my giant mouth.

Pain throbbed through my leg. I closed my eyes. Instead of screaming loud enough to shatter the stained glass, instead of leaping up and putting my fist through the ceiling, instead of eating Pan-Cake, I calmly plugged in the ham radio and held the speaker, as tiny as a quail’s egg between my trembling thumb and finger.

“Um . . . Palm Tree to . . . Ant Lion.” My voice shook. “This is Palm Tree to Ant Lion.”

There were a few moments of static before Liz’s voice came over the speaker. “Phoebe? Oh, thank goodness. I thought we’d lost you.”

“I need food.”

“Of course you do, darling,” Liz said. “You must be as skinny as a telephone pole by now. Where are you?”

I glanced around the church, my sanctuary, the place that had kept me hidden and protected from the world these last two weeks while I grew. Could I trust that Liz really was just trying to help? My stomach turned over like an avalanche and I clamped my trembling lips shut.

“Phoebe,” Liz said in her delicate voice, “Hal can deliver more food than you could possibly eat. He’ll drive fast and be there in thirty minutes. You just have to complete an assignment for us and tell us where you are.”

The thought of food made the locusts break up a bit.

“What do I need to do?”

“We need you to cause a scene. Something big enough to make it in tomorrow’s paper and raise Daddy’s eyebrows a bit.”

My stomach thundered, and I leaned forward, trying to quiet it.

“Like what?”

“You could . . . destroy something. A public building—the school perhaps. Or the police station. It’s your choice.”

My nails dug into my palms. I had enough rage built up inside me that I was confident I could flatten both. I unclenched my hands. I’d never much cared for suburban towns like Pennybrooke, but I never wanted to be the terror in one either. Not for girls like Katie. Or the boy with his arm in a sling. Not for anybody.

“Have you ever been in a Shiver?” I asked Liz.

“Of course I have. Probably more than anyone other than you.”

“Then you know what they’re like. You know the fear that freezes up your bone marrow, making you believe the whole world’s coming to a close.” I breathed in then out. “How can you ask me to do that to people?”

“Because, Phoebe, it’s all we have right now. We have to keep Daddy entertained until we find a better solution. You know this.”

“Yeah,” I said in a voice so quiet I didn’t know if Liz heard me. “I guess I do.”

Mr. Peak spoke up in the background. “Tell her she needs to act now.”

“Phoebe?” Liz said. “Daddy’s eyes are dulling a bit. He hasn’t picked up the remote again, but we’re growing concerned.”

It had been a relief not seeing Daddy’s eyes these past weeks. I’d even taken my hose baths on the far side of the church so I wouldn’t have to see him.

“Phoebe?”

“St. Maria’s Church.”

“Excellent,” Liz said. “And you’re going to . . .”

“Yes.”

“Hal is standing by with food,” she said.

I clicked off the speaker and regretted not requesting a cigarette the size of a fence post.