5

Psychic Protection

Self-Defense for Your Soul

DAVID’S STORY

Due to his mother’s mental illness and chronic alcoholism, David was placed in foster care at an early age. He was one of the fortunate ones and ended up in a decent home. A place he cherished. Yet, as all children do, he loved and missed his mother and wished for her to get well so his family could live together again. When David was ten years old, his mother recovered long enough to regain custody of him and his sister. For a while, life was relatively normal. David attended school, hung out with friends after school, and came home to his mother and sister. However, it wasn’t long before they were living on the street. David and his sister were not attending school, and they spent their days taking the bus with their mother to the temporary cleaning jobs that she took to pay for her cigarettes, alcohol, and some food. It was a crazy, sleepless life.

But David loved his mother, and still wanted to live with her.

Then one day as he was riding the bus with his mother and sister to yet another place, David suddenly jumped out of his seat and ran out the open back door of the bus onto the street. He continued to run, not knowing why or where he was going. It was not something he had thought about or planned—something inside of him pushed him off the bus and told his feet to run—just run. As he ran he thought, “I can’t do this anymore . . . I can’t stay.”

His mother grabbed his sister and chased down a taxicab and caught up with David. She told the driver to take them to the local hospital, where she tried to convince the doctors to admit her son “because he is crazy!” But the doctors quickly recognized that it was not David who needed to be hospitalized. They placed his mother in an alcohol detox program and sent David and his sister back to the foster home.

David was safe again—missing his mother, but safe.

When he tells this story now he shares that it was “pure intuition” that saved him. His jumping off the bus and running was beyond reason and thought. He simply trusted that voice in him that said “No more,” and ran: “If I had thought about it at all, I would not have done it. As a ten-year-old it was too difficult to think about leaving my mother.”

Later in his teen years the same voice rescued him from another attempt to live a life with his mother. Again he wanted his family together, but again his mother soon began drinking and acting crazy. If he had thought much about it, he would have tried to hide the bottles again, try to make dinners for the three of them, and stay out of the way of his mother’s boyfriends. He considered dropping out of school to take care of his mother and sister. Instead, that same inner push that made him run from the bus got him to call for help. One night, without thinking, he just got up from watching television and called social services to come pick up his sister and him. As they left with the social worker, he remembers telling his mother, “We will be back,” and he really thought they would be. It was as if someone else had made the phone call for him. From then on, he stayed with his foster parents and succeeded in getting his high school diploma.

“. . . perhaps all the dragons of our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us once beautiful and brave.”

—RAINER MARIA RILKE, GERMAN POET

THE STORY OF HALF-BOY

Borneo story, translated by Michael Meade, storyteller and author

In this story it is told that Half-boy is born, a boy with only the right half of his body. Of course, he is unhappy and feels desperately incomplete. He becomes a constant source of irritation, embarrassment, and confusion for his family and the entire village. Nevertheless, he grows. That is to say, the half of him that can be seen grows. Eventually, he reaches the age of adolescence and puberty. His halfness and incompleteness become unbearable to him. His pain grows more evident and more troublesome to everyone around him.

One day he leaves the village, dragging himself along the way a half-person drags himself through life. He drags along until he reaches a place where the road crosses a river. At that crossroad, he meets another youth who exists as only the left half, the other half of a person. Immediately, they move toward each other as if fated to join together. Surprisingly, when they reach each other, they begin to fight and roll in the dust. Eventually, they fall into the river. After a time, from the river there arises an entire youth with both sides joined together. Because he has been in the river and in a great struggle, he feels disoriented and doesn’t know where he stands. Then, the new youth begins to walk toward a village that he sees before him.

As he enters the village, he sees an old man and asks: “Can you tell me where I am? I have been struggling and don’t know where I have arrived at.” The old man says: “You have arrived home. You are back in the village where you were born. Now that you have returned whole, everyone can begin the dance and celebration.” A great dance and feast begins. Everyone in the village joins the dance, especially the Half-boy become whole.

“I’m never scared of anything. But my tummy is.”

—PRESCHOOLER, FROM A MONSTER IS BIGGER THAN 9, EDITED BY CLAIRE ERICKSEN

In both of the preceding stories, a young man was compelled by an inner voice to take action to change the damaging conditions of his life. Each of you has an inner guardian that will pull you toward safety and wholeness in your life. That instinctive voice can rescue you. Sometimes it will tell you to run to safety; sometimes it will tell you to quietly stay put until help arrives. It may move you to speak up in some situations, while in others it will warn you to keep still. Recognizing and reinforcing that inner protector is a powerful tool to help yourself in difficult times, whether the difficulty is due to an alcoholic parent, feeling incomplete, or suffering from stress at school.

Shamanic cultures taught their teenagers how to find wholeness and maintain their physical and psychic safety. This chapter offers you many simple yet powerful ways to protect that “tender vision of your beautiful heart.”

WHOLENESS IS SAFETY

Being half of what you are, of what you are meant to be, is not safe for you. Becoming who you are—becoming whole—makes you strong, makes you safe, even when the world around you is not safe. In this time of transitioning from childhood to adulthood you need to find out what makes you whole, what helps you express your true nature. Listen to the words of Emerson, the great naturalist and author:

“Oh Man! There is no planet, sun or star could hold you, if you but knew who you are.”

Wholeness Meditation

This mediation is particularly helpful for those of you who feel like the Half-boy, incomplete in some way. But it is also appropriate for any teenager, still “putting yourself together,” in search of your adult half. Give yourself about five minutes to do this meditation and another five to journal your experiences. Have someone slowly read this aloud. You can do this meditation alone or in a group.

Find a quiet place and ground yourself.

With your eyes closed, imagine yourself in a place in nature that you enjoy. It could be in a field, on a mountainside, in a city park, or near a body of water—whatever place brings you a sense of safety and peace. Feel your body in this place; imagine the smells and sights that you would experience there. Look above you and see in the blue sky some soft white clouds floating by . . .

Now, imagine looking around you and finding a path . . . Begin walking on this path. Walk down the path, simply noticing what might appear . . . Breathe and relax, and continue walking down the path.

As you continue to walk down the path, you notice an object of some kind on the path ahead. As you continue walking toward this object, you see that it is some kind of container. This is a sacred container that holds knowledge just for you. It may be a box or a bowl of some kind; it could be a bag or chest. It could even be a large hole in the ground. As you approach it, take notice of what material it is made of, its color, texture, and shape, and any decoration it may have.

When you reach this sacred container, sit down next to it.

Choose something to leave behind that is weighing you down or keeping you from feeling whole. Leave anything that is making life difficult for you right now next to your sacred container. What worry, concern, person or object is somehow keeping you from feeling complete? Trust what comes and place that next to the sacred container. Breathe and relax for a few breaths. Notice what you are leaving behind, and what feelings this brings up. Feel the spaciousness you have created in your self and your life as a result of leaving some things behind.

Now ask this question: What is it I need now to make me more whole, more complete? Ask that you be given something that will help you, now, to be more complete. Sit for a moment with this prayer request . . . breathing and praying . . .

When you feel ready, open the container and look inside. Notice what is there for you—this particular object, image, thought, or emotion is the answer to your request. Trust what comes. Trust what first appears. Remain sitting, taking note of the object that is meant to help you, at this time, become more whole, more complete. Breathe . . .

Now place the object in the palm of your hand. If it is too large, use your imagination to shrink it so it will fit into the palm of your hand. Then imagine taking this object in your hand and placing in your heart. Once it is in your heart, get up and begin walking back up the path . . . walking back through the woods, with this object in your heart . . . walking up the path to the place in nature where you began.

When you get back sit, in that place for a moment. Look inside your heart and find the object you brought back with you. Then begin to notice the room you are now in by feeling your feet on the floor and your breath rising and falling in your body.

When you feel ready, open your eyes and look around you. Then take a moment to look inside your heart and find the object there, making sure that you did bring it back with you.

“Clouds come from time to time—and bring a chance to rest from looking at the moon.”

—BASHŌ, JAPANESE HAIKU POET

Take a few moments to journal your experience. What does this object mean to you? How might this thing help you be more complete? How does it feel to have left some worry behind?

“I couldn’t see anything but a verydeep black hole. I thought that I just wasn’t able to imagine anything, but Julie recommended that I trust whatever came to me. So I went with the big black void, and put this in my heart. And when I came back and journaled I realized that this black hole was my anger. I was angry with so many people. Bringing it back in my heart and looking at it gave me a chance to really deal with this blackness.
    “The first thing I did was drop out of debate class. I really hated it and every time I went I was just pissed off at everyone. I had stayed in the class because I thought my parents really wanted me to, and I thought they’d be upset when I dropped out. But they were cool about it. My debate teacher was upset with me for the remainder of my senior year, but I could deal with that. I did feel more whole doing what made sense for me.”

—JASMINE, AGE 17

“I found an apple, and I am not sure what it means . . . I guess it means health, and that maybe I need to take care of myself better.“

—SCOTT, AGE 18

“Every time I do this journey my sacred container is a tree. And there is a large opening in the tree where advice and knowledge are kept for me. This tree feels very real to me—a place I can go to when I need help. Which is often.”

—CAITLIN, AGE 18

“I left behind my car! I was so worried about my new car getting scratched and dented, it was really bad. It felt great to leave it there and not to be worried about it anymore.”

—JAMES, AGE 18

CAN LOVE MAKE YOU WHOLE?

It is important to mention here that feeling incomplete is part of the journey through your teen years. To “come of age” means to meet up with your missing half, becoming a whole adult. However, many of us go in search of other things—fame, money, or romance—and in doing so lose sight of ourselves.

For teenagers this often means searching for the perfect relationship—the ultimate love partner. This is a very powerful drive during your teen years, and can remain so throughout your life. Unfortunately, many of us get lost on our way to find wholeness and happiness—we get lost in search of the perfect Other instead of seeking our whole and true self. Searching for someone else, rather than seeking your own wholeness, can create great difficulty for you and sometimes even endanger you.

Vija got quite lost. He felt so strongly about finding the right girl that he often forgot about himself. He would get so involved in his girlfriends’ lives that he would forget his schoolwork, neglect his friends, and even forget to eat if a girlfriend was having problems. And he seemed to hook up with girls who were having a lot of difficulty themselves.

“In all the great spiritual and mystery traditions, the central theme, the guiding passion, is the deep yearning for the Beloved of the soul.”

—JEAN HOUSTON, AUTHOR OF THE SEARCH FOR THE BELOVED

His latest girlfriend, Sophia, was a brilliant, attractive seventeen-year-old who was addicted to alcohol and marijuana. She would also do other drugs when she had the money. Vija tried to keep her clean and would succeed at it for a while but something would always pull Sophia back into her old habits. The last time this happened she actually hurt some of her friends in a drunk driving accident.

She was placed on probation, her driver’s license was suspended, and the court ordered her to get counseling. Vija was hopeful that she would finally get her act together. But she quit counseling as soon as the court order had been satisfied. Then the couple got pregnant and decided to move into Vija’s parents’ house.

What do you think happened to Vija’s plans and dreams? Do you think that he found his other half in this relationship? Even Vija is unsure of what his dreams are at this time.

When you depend on a romantic relationship to make you feel okay or whole, you can get into trouble—sometimes big trouble. Rushing into what turns out to be a bad relationship can have painful consequences, and sometimes change the entire course of your life. Although your teen years are a great time to explore relationships, they are also an important time to explore yourself. To find your missing pieces, to focus on becoming whole. Yet often in our most difficult times, instead of seeking truth and strength within ourselves, we look for a romance to rescue us. Consider Rachel’s story.

Rachel came to me because she was having a difficult time at home. Her father was very controlling and unwilling to compromise. Her mother kept saying that she was going to get a divorce but it never seemed to happen. There was always a crisis going on at home. Neither of her parents had money for Rachel’s college education and they were unable to help her apply for schools. She was not well prepared for life after high school, but she insisted she was going to leave the house the moment she turned eighteen. When she came to me, she was in her senior year of high school and she was doing okay in her classes. However, she was overwhelmed because she committed herself to too many projects. When we talked about it, she said she didn’t want to drop anything because being busy gave her a reason to stay away from home and to not focus on her worries.

Jean Houston in a conversation with Mother Teresa:
    “Mother, how does it happen that you are able to do so much, and why are you in this state of joy?”
    “My dear,” she said, “it is because I am so deeply in love.”
    “But Mother, you’re a nun!”
    “Precisely,” she said “I am married to Jesus.”
   “Yes, I understand, you’re married to Jesus. All nuns are.”
    “No, you don’t understand,” she countered, “I really am. I am so in a state of love that I see the face of my Beloved in the face of the dying man in the streets of Calcutta. I see my Beloved in the day-old child who’s left outside our convent, and in the leper whose flesh is decaying, and I can’t do enough for my Beloved! That is why I try to do something beautiful every day.”

—FROM JEAN HOUSTON’S THE SEARCH FOR THE BELOVED

A couple of months after she turned eighteen, in the beginning of her senior year, Rachel followed through on her promise, and during another crisis at home she got up and left. She found a place to live at a friend’s house but she felt she was a burden to her friend. When she came in to see me that week she said she felt “numb.” She had recently ended a relationship with a boy she’d been seeing for three years. She told me she was overwhelmed and not sure what the future held for her. It was almost too much to focus on applying to colleges.

In my office I have I Ching cards one can use to ask questions and tune in to one’s own inner truth. When it was time for Rachel to consult the cards, I was thinking she would want to know what she could do to calm the stress down, or to find a place to live, or what she might focus on to open up her life more to her future. Instead, she inquired about a young man she was having strong feelings for, and what she might do to get his attention. With so much to resolve in her life at that time, the last thing she needed was another relationship to deal with. Yet, it is understandable that at this troubled time she just wanted to feel loved, and to have something else to focus her emotions on. She just wanted to feel connected to something greater than all the difficulty surrounding her, and in our culture we are too often taught that this “thing” is a romantic partner.

Rachel had not been taught that spirit is with her always and that there are ways to tap into this greater power every day. The message she continually got from popular culture was that “happily ever after” always means finding “that guy” (or girl). Happily ever after can include romantic love but it always includes spirit. As Sobonfu Somé reminds us, “This world of spirit applies to absolutely everyone in the world. Because without spirit, we wouldn’t even make it here. It would be really hard to know whether we were going to wake up tomorrow and be alive without spirit. It would be really hard to know we have life.”

How well do you think Rachel would have dealt with all the decisions facing her if she got caught up in all the excitement and uncertainty of exploring a new romantic relationship? What kind of relationship do you think she would have had if she got involved with someone at this point in her life?

“Separation from spirit, as we see here in the West, causes a greater emphasis on romantic love. It creates a vortex of longing for another person, for another way of connecting. Yet, romantic love is only one way of finding that other connection, which is to spirit, that we are actually looking for.”

—SOBONFU SOMÉ, AFRICAN SHAMAN, AUTHOR OF THE SPIRIT OF INTIMACY

It’s not that romantic love isn’t wonderful—it can be. But it is really the desire to feel your place in this world, to have a sense of who you are, to be connected to spirit, that often drives you to connect with others romantically. In many traditions such as Sufism, sacred psychology, Buddhism, and mystical Christianity, the search for romantic love (for the Beloved) is recognized as our search for the sacred.

Consider the story of the Half-boy. If he had gone in search of romantic love rather than himself, where would he be now?

We all want to feel this sacred connection to something beautiful. Romantic love can make you feel like you have everything you could ever want. But soon you find out that even when you have found your “soul mate,” after a while that yearning for the connection with more, with your purpose, with spirit, comes back. So, romantic love is just part of finding wholeness and happiness. Shamans know this to be true, and that is why they teach their youth about energy and spiritual power. Only from a place of spiritual empowerment can you call to you a romantic partner with whom you can truly be happy.

Once you devote yourself to being whole, you can more easily and successfully create healthy, safe relationships with others. Most of your life happens in relationships—with family, friends, teachers, neighbors, employers, acquaintances. Many of these relationships will be a source of great pleasure and even joy. But sometimes they will be difficult, causing stress and threatening your self-esteem. When this happens, you have the tools within yourself to be safe. You have the ability to protect yourself in all your relationships and situations.

WHAT IS PSYCHIC PROTECTION?

Psychic protection is the ability to create a safe place within and around yourself, so you can freely be yourself. It is a shield you create to deflect the negative or unwanted thoughts and energy of others and to prevent you from losing your energy and self to other people or places. It is a psychic form of self-defense and has been used for thousands of years by shamans and everyday folk alike. Psychic protection works by strengthening your energy body to defend against any negative influences. For shamans, psychic protection includes calling on guardian spirits to help them when they do their psychic “journeys.”

“God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the Wisdom to know the difference.”

—SERENITY PRAYER, REINHOLD NIEBUHR, AMERICAN THEOLOGIAN

“I am protected in front of me.
I am protected to the right of me.
I am protected behind me.
I am protected to the left of me.”

—FROM THE TEEN SPELL BOOK, BY JAMIE WOOD

When Do You Need Psychic Protection?

Everyone at some time or another needs psychic protection. In this busy, full, sometimes frantic world we live in, we are frequently exposed to negative energies. The following list of questions will help you identify situations when you need psychic protection from these negative energies.

• Is it difficult for you to relax and be yourself?
• Do you at times feel overwhelmed at school?
• Is it hard for you to focus at school (but you can do so when you are alone)?
• Do you feel “dumped on” by others?
• Do you tend to feel down when a friend is down?
• Does school or any other place make you feel drained, tired, or weak?
• Do you feel overly sensitive to your environment?
• Are there places or people that make you feel useless or worthless?
• Do you ever feel “not yourself”?
• Do you feel as if you give a lot of your energy to others?
• Do you feel drained of energy after being around a certain person?
• Do you suffer from anxiety or panic attacks?
• Do you feel certain people or places “suck” your energy, leaving you tired?
• Are there people in your life who put you down?
• Do you abuse prescription or recreational drugs? (This includes alcohol.)

If you answered yes to two or more of the above, you would benefit from psychic protection, and you may want to take some extra time in this chapter.

“Where there is pain, cures will be found.
Where there is poverty, wealth will be supplied.
Where there are questions, answers will be given.
Spend less time worrying, and more time trusting.”

—RUMI, SUFI MASTER AND POET

You can begin with this simple technique that I use regularly when I am scared or simply worried. It is a call to your spiritual source to go before you and prepare your way, to make things safer for you, and to be ready to come to your aid. Simply make this declaration, out loud or to yourself:

 

Spirit goes before me and prepares my way.

After saying this declaration to yourself, take some time to imagine a powerful guardian or force going before you and making things better and safer for you. Hold this in your mind as you go to meet your difficulty—whatever it may be.

Such prayers of protection are found throughout all spiritual practices. Many Christians pray to Mother Mary or St. Jude for protection. In Egypt, over three thousand years ago, they prayed to the divine Mother, Isis, for protection. The power of such prayer is your ability to call on the energies and spirits of these beings to protect you. You then carry their energy with you into the world and into the environment where you need protection.

“If people call you stupid and that upsets you, then you are immediately under their spell because at some level you believe them.”

—JOSÉ STEVENS AND LENA S. STEVENS, AUTHORS OF SECRETS OF SHAMANISM

Casting a Spell of Protection

In some traditions, a meditation such as the one that follows is considered an “empowerment,” a way to empower yourself; in other traditions it might be thought of as a “spell”—a way to make a wish powerful enough to become a reality in your life. There are many names for the same undertaking—use the one that works for you. If you feel stronger by saying you are casting a spell, go for it; if you would rather feel you are empowering yourself, then so be it.

Color Shield Meditation

Find time when you can be alone in your room, undisturbed, for five minutes. Sit in a meditative posture with your eyes closed.

Imagine bringing a white or golden light down from above to surround you. Let this light surround you and feel it touch your skin, so that this glow of golden or white light seems to come from you.

Now imagine the color of the light changing slowly to each of the colors of the rainbow: orange, red, yellow, purple, blue, and green (not black or brown). Notice how each color feels to you and which one makes you feel most protected. When you find the color that makes you feel the safest and the most protected, keep that colored light glowing around you. Know that this light will go with you to surround and protect you in any difficult situation. As you open your eyes, continue to imagine the shield of light still surrounding you. Any time you need it, you can simply invoke this shield and it will appear around you for your protection in emotionally or socially challenging situations. This protection is primarily energetic, so it will not protect you physically.

The Glass Body

A compelling shamanic technique for protecting yourself in difficult situations is “shape shifting.” Shape shifting is about changing your energy body to take on the particular energy of an animal. There are many reasons for practicing shape shifting—for protection, to experience an animal’s medicine, or to enter another reality. Many of us experience shape shifting in dreams, where we may become a bird or change into several people. In my class I refer to the following technique of shape shifting as the “Glass Body,” or the Gandhi approach to protection. This exercise is very helpful in situations when you are with another person who is in the habit of dumping on you and who usually leaves you feeling awful. (Even when someone has a reason to be mad at you, it doesn’t give him or her the right to dump negativity on you.)

“The ultimate nature of all human interactions is that they are exchanges of energy— positive exchanges, negative exchanges, neutral exchanges, but exchanges in one way or another.”

—VICTOR SANCHEZ, MEXICAN SHAMAN, AUTHOR OF THE TOLTEC PATH OF RECAPITULATION

“Shamans often change their appearance (energetically) or disguise themselves in order to go undetected or avoid unwanted attention.”

—JOSÉ STEVENS AND LENA S. STEVENS, AUTHORS OF SECRETS OF SHAMANISM

 

his words fell
like rocks from his mouth
and clattered all around him.
even after
the avalanche had cleared,
I could feel them jostling
around
in my head
keeping me awake.

—KIRSTEN SAVITRI BERGH, TEEN POET

“The needle that pierces our hearts carries the thread that binds us to Heaven.”

—JAMES HASTINGS, AUTHOR OF THE ENCYCLOPEDIA OF RELIGION AND ETHICS

“Light is always stronger than darkness, and that silver lining can take over an entire gray, billowing cloud—if only you will believe it can.”

—JAMIE WOOD, AUTHOR OF THE TEEN SPELL BOOK

Do this exercise a few minutes before you are about to have a face-to-face with someone who puts you down.

Take a moment to ground. Remember to relax and breathe. Now visualize an image of yourself standing before you. Picture yourself as a clear glass body. Then bring that glass body over to you and surround yourself with it. You are shape shifting, changing energetically into a glass body. Now go to meet the negative person, knowing that all through your interaction you will be present in a glass body. What this means is that any negativity aimed at you will just pass through you. Your energy body will follow Gandhi’s example, not pushing against or resisting the other person’s words, but simply letting them pass through you. You are neutral, unmoved by what is being said. Remember to breathe when you are with this person.

After the person has left, take a moment to check in with yourself. Are you feeling any negativity in your body or emotions? If so, it means that a particular comment made by this other person “stuck” to a belief inside you that the comment is true. When you are in the glass body, all the other person’s negativity just moves through you and can only get stuck on a place in you that agrees to it. Your glass body is like a clean window—all the light shines through it, only getting stuck on any dust or dirt that may remain on the window. So when Joe says, “You are worthless,” if you don’t believe this to be true about yourself, his energy and comment will just past right through your glass body. If you do already believe this about yourself, you will feel his negative comment in your physical and energy body. This is a signal that you need to examine this belief and begin to work through why you believe it and what you can do about making it untrue for you.

Tamara, a seventeen-year-old client, once asked, “How is it that I can have a great day until just one person gives me a bad look or says something nasty to me? Everything good that happened to me the rest of the day gets trashed!”

This can be true for many of us—and there is one reason this typically happens. You get brought down because that nasty look or comment hooks up with a belief or perception you hold of yourself that is dormant—not in your conscious awareness. If it didn’t feel true to you somehow, it wouldn’t be likely to bother you. When you feel brought down as a result of what someone has said to you, or how someone has acted toward you, it is time to check in with yourself. Ask yourself: What belief in me agrees with this person’s negative take on me?

“Even from a dark night songs of beauty may be born.”

—MARYANNE RADMACHERHERSHEY, AMERICAN AUTHOR

“Earth and heaven are in us.”

—MAHATMA GANDHI, INDIAN PACIFIST LEADER

When you do identify a negative belief about yourself, examine it with an open and relaxed mind. Is this belief based on unfair and untrue criticisms that you have heard all your life? Or, underneath the unnecessary harshness and negativity, is there a germ of truth in it? If you determine that the belief is someone else’s voice that you have carried too long, now it is time to banish it from your life. If you sense that there is some truth to this belief, you need to decide how you want to handle it. You may decide that this aspect of yourself is something you are ready to change. If so, you can begin to make a realistic and positive plan for what you will need in order to make that change (see A Model for Changing on page 212). If, instead, you recognize that this is a part of you that you cannot change, or are not yet ready to change, you need to be kind to yourself and acknowledge that you, like everyone else, are human and not perfect. You still have every right to feel safe and good about yourself.

Five Differences

Another simple, in-the-moment strategy for protecting yourself in a negative encounter with someone is to focus on identifying five physical differences between you and the other person. Simply name these five differences to yourself. “Jane has blue eyes and I have green. She is taller than I am. I sing in the choir and she does not.” This helps you to be in your own space and to successfully differentiate yourself from the other person. You are less likely to take on her stuff, her negative energy, when you take control of your thoughts this way. I find it gives me something else to “listen” to instead of the criticism or the blaming that the other person may be engaging in. It also helps keep your energy neutral because you are not automatically reacting to the energy of what the other person is communicating to you.

Clearing Out Negative Energy

Are there times when you feel you just can’t shake a negative feeling? Or, after being with a certain person, do you always feel down? Often this occurs after someone has “attacked” you with negative energy. He or she may not have said anything, but instead attacked you nonverbally—just giving you that look and zapping you energetically. Being more aware of the energy world will help you realize when this has happened. Then, you can do something about it and not carry this harmful energy around.

When energy is hurled at you, there will usually be some harm to your energy body. Therefore, you will need to release that negative energy. Crying, talking about it, and breathing are natural and effective ways to release that energy, as are all the breathing practices in this book. The following exercise can be especially helpful to free yourself of the negative energy you take on from others.

Amethyst Rain Meditation

Give yourself about five to ten minutes for this exercise. Take a moment to ground and sit comfortably but alert in a chair with your feet on the floor. Take five deep breaths through the nose, holding for a moment and then releasing through the mouth. On each exhale imagine releasing the negativity from your body.

On the next inhale, while relaxing in the breath, visualize an amethyst cloud above you. Watch this cloud shower amethyst raindrops on you and right through you. Continue to breathe, taking nice deep breaths through the nose and exhaling through the mouth. Imagine every cell, every molecule and atom being washed by this rain of amethyst . . . the lavender water cleansing you and going down into the earth where it can be recycled and reused. Stay with this image for as long as you need to.

Hoocha Meditation

This meditation comes from the Q’ero tradition of Brazil. The Q’ero people believe that there is a being, called Hoocha, in our bodies that will gobble up any negative and dark energy we have in our selves. At the end of each day people will take the time to let Hoocha clear out any negativity that they are carrying in their physical and energetic bodies. They understand the importance of not holding on to the negative energy of others.

Give yourself five minutes alone in your room sometime before you go to sleep at night. Focus your attention on the bottom of the second chakra (below your belly button). Now imagine Hoocha there. He has a big mouth that is opening and beginning to eat all the dark, negative energy in your body. Imagine the darkness being consumed by this being, his jaws crunching and his throat gulping. Like water in a plastic bottle with a hole in the bottom, the negativity begins to empty out of you, moving down from your head to your second chakra, where the Hoocha consumes it. Any of the “crumbs” that fall to the side go out the bottoms of your feet into the earth.

When the Hoocha has eaten all the negativity in you, he will close his eyes and fall asleep smiling. When he does, sit for a moment, breathing and enjoying the freshness of your energy body.

Opening the Soul’s Window

Here is another quick clearing technique that can be used any time you find you are carrying a negative thought or feeling. Simply ask yourself, Is this my feeling? Is this my thought? Just ask the question. When you ask yourself something like this, you are screening and filtering your feelings, not allowing yourself to just take in and assume negativity. The question opens the door inside your soul; like opening a window in the house, this brings in fresh air. You don’t have to force an answer, or even think about the answer—just ask yourself the question: Is this my stuff? Your soul will help you answer the question. So often we just go around carrying all this negativity that isn’t really ours, without asking, Whose stuff is this anyway? Once the window to the soul is open, once the fresh air is let in, your soul steps in, and behind the scenes (without your knowing it) helps clear out what isn’t yours. Keeping your mind alert by asking such questions is a very powerful tool for psychic protection.

Spirit Helpers and Allies

Shamans and many other spiritual teachers regularly call on the spirit world for help. They identify specific spirit guardians and allies to accompany them on their spiritual journeys for guidance and protection. Shamans also draw strength from the natural world, calling on the power of animals, rocks, and plants.

Perhaps you can benefit from seeking a guardian from the spirit world or from nature. Do you already have a sense of a guardian angel, or perhaps a deceased grandparent or pet that is with you, protecting and supporting you? Are you especially fond of certain animals, such as turtles, bears, or hawks? Notice which animals you surround yourself with (look at your stuffed animals, jewelry, or posters). One of them is probably a power animal for you.

By calling on spirit helpers and allies you can empower yourself when you feel the need for protection. Invite them, whoever they are, to walk beside you. Invite a bear or other animal, Jesus, the Buddha, Saint Christopher, Padmasambhava, your guardian angel, your grandfather who loved you, or the Great Goddess to stand by your side as you confront a difficult or challenging situation. Because energy is real and holds power, the presence of your allies will be felt by you and by others as well. You will notice an increase in personal power and courage when you call on your allies.

To call on your allies, you can be standing or sitting. Begin as always by grounding and taking a couple of deep breaths. Then tell your allies why it is you need their help, and invite them to join you. Imagine them (or him or her) standing next to you or surrounding you. Ask them to accompany you into your difficult situation. As you walk toward your destination, imagine them walking by your side or behind you. I often call on Padmasambhava, the Buddha of compassion, and my power animal, the red-tailed hawk, to accompany me.

“In shamanic societies it is the Warrior’s task to become visible, and through example and intention to empower and inspire others.”

—ANGELES ARRIEN, ANTHROPOLOGIST, AUTHOR

I have a friend who brought an ally with him to his first job after college. He was a social worker in a stressed and sometimes perilous neighborhood. He would have to show up to work in the evening hours when the streets were often full of people who were drugged and drunk. In order to feel (and be) stronger and safer, he brought with him his bear ally. He would call on his big black bear to walk right behind him, providing courage and protection for him as he walked from his car to the building where he worked. He did this every night for several months.

Then one day he was called in to work early. Because the sun was still shining and the streets were quieter, he felt safer and forgot to call on his bear ally before he left home.

As my friend approached the building a homeless man lay huddled in a corner keeping warn. The man looked up at my friend and asked him, “Where’s the bear?”

Your ally too will be felt, and perhaps even seen, by others. Try it out some day when you are afraid or simply need that extra support.

“I use my ally when I want to stand up for myself. I think others do sense my ally, or can feel something different about me.”

—JAKE, AGE 19

You may also want to invite your friends or living elders to be present as your allies in times when you are dealing with difficult people or situations. You never have to be alone at such times. Any time you feel unsafe, take an ally with you. Don’t allow yourself to be ganged up on, by peers, teachers, or any adult in authority. Ask your parents or another adult who believes in you to be with you.

“My boss called me in to a ‘meeting’ after I told him I was leaving my job. I knew he was going to dump on me, big time! I told him that I was going to bring my older brother to the meeting. My employer said that there was no need for that, but I told him I was going to anyway. So he canceled the meeting.”

—ANNETTE, AGE 19

“Stand in the Light when you want to speak out.”

—CROW PROVERB

YOU ARE THE LIGHT

Shamans know that our intentions, our motives and reasons for doing things, hold great power. That is why prayers, affirmations, chants, and meditations are so effective; they express our intentions. In fact, every prayer, expectation, hope, and chant is an intention. My spiritual teacher continually reminded us that “energy follows intention”—intentions put out their own energy. Your intentions have the power to attract and to create. In the following prayer you are sending out the intention of protection and truth:

 

I am the Light
The Light is within me
The Light moves throughout me
The Light surrounds me
The Light protects me
I am the Light.

As you repeat this prayer, imagine the light within you, moving through you, surrounding and protecting you. Feel the light lifting and strengthening you. Focus your thoughts on the above intention and the intention becomes real. This prayer reminds you of who you truly are—a being of energy, of light.

 

“I will not die an unlived life.
I will not live in fear
of falling or catching fire.
I choose to inhabit my days,
to allow my living to open me,
to make me less afraid,
more accessible;
to loosen my heart
until it becomes a wing,
a torch, a promise.
I choose to risk my significance,
to live so that which came to me as seed
goes to the next as blossom,
and that which came to me as blossom,
goes on as fruit.”

—DAWN MARKOVA, FROM “I WILL NOT LIVE AN UNLIVED LIFE”