ARMAND
My eyes were glued to the screen. I was glad Ella’s casts were off so I could hold her hand because I needed her to ground me, to keep me from floating out of that room. I was truly happy, so happy that this all felt unreal. That was my baby on that screen—big head, tiny body, little legs and arms moving.
My baby.
“Here’s the heartbeat,” the tech pointed out, and all I could do was blink back tears. My baby had a heartbeat.
I felt Ella squeeze my hand before she asked, “What do you think?”
“I think…thank you, Ella. Thank you,” I replied.
“Thank you back.”
ELLA
“Today is the day, no? I am happy for you, chérie. I am happy that you are happy. I only wish…”
“Claude, please don’t ruin this day for me by bringing her up. I love her as my mother, but I’ve made a choice not to have her in my life. You told me you would respect that. It was a requirement for me to continue with our friendship. I care for you, but I will cut you off, too, if you can’t adhere to my boundaries.”
“I can. I will. Forgive me, mon ange. I will not bring her up again. Congratulations.”
“Thank you. Oh, I’ve gotta go.”
“Okay, tout mon amour!”
I hung up as Aunt Kim entered my bedroom. “They’re ready?” I asked with wide eyes. My heart was hammering in my chest.
Smiling, she nodded. “Yes, they are! You look beautiful, Ella!”
“Thank you. I’ve gained so much weight. I mean, I don’t care about that, but I do hope this dress looks flattering. I don’t want to look back on this day and think I should’ve chosen something else, something not so…fitted.”
“Oh, no! That dress is gorgeous on you!”
Smiling, I asked, “How’s Boogie?”
“Excited, nervous, happy, in love.”
“Me, too.”
“Ella, you ready—shit. Oh my god. Princess…” That was my dad. This was his first time seeing me in my dress, hence his reaction. He was standing in the open doorway looking so handsome in a white tuxedo, his locs pulled back in a ponytail. His roots were beginning to gray, but my daddy still looked big and young and handsome.
“I’m going to go take my place. See you two in a little bit,” Aunt Kim said, leaving the room and closing the door behind her.
“You look so beautiful,” my dad said, his voice quivering. “I can’t believe my baby is really grown up and having her own baby. Where the fuck did the time go?”
I stood, pulling him into a hug as he wiped tears from his face. “No one can ever take your place. You’re my daddy. You’ll always be my daddy, and when I have this baby, she’ll get to see what a wonderful father I was blessed to have in my life for all my life. Thank you for being my daddy.”
“I’m honored to be your daddy. There are things in my life I wish I could go back and change but being your father will never be one of them. I’m hurt because a part of me wanted you to stay my little girl forever. I’m devastated because I didn’t know On One was hurting you, but I’m confident you’re in good hands now. That little nigga will fight a lion for you, just like I will.”
I laughed into his chest. “Are you ever going to call him by his name?”
“Probably not.”
He squeezed me tightly to him, cocooning me in his comfort and safety for a few minutes before walking me into my living room and presenting me to my handsome groom in his own white tuxedo, that diamond chain resting atop a white bow tie. I smiled. The only thought in my head?
Mine.
ARMAND
She had on this white dress that fit her so that you could see her round stomach. Wasn’t no question that she was carrying my baby. That fact was obvious now. She was so beautiful that I found myself crying the second she stepped into the room. She was wearing makeup for the first time since the accident, and her hair was straight, falling past her shoulders. She was smiling. Her father was crying as hard as I was, but I don’t think his tears were from joy.
It was her idea to get married at home and in private. It was also her idea to only invite a few people, family plus my best man, Scotty, and her guy of honor—some shit she made up—that Carlos nigga who I now believed was gay since he brought his dude with him. My little brothers and sister were excited to be there just like Ella’s siblings were. It was a nice little crowd of folks, including all her uncles, who were mean-mugging me but hadn’t threatened my life per Ella’s request. Hell, even her Aunt Kat was giving me the eye.
Once she reached me, I took her hand and kissed it before we turned to face Mother Erica, who was evidently an ordained minister. She stood holding a sacred text and wearing a beautiful blue dress, a white cloth covering her hair.
“Sisters and brothers, kings and queens, we have assembled today for the joining of two tribes, the convergence of two nations...
As she spoke, more tears fell from my eyes. I was just…full. Full of love, full of happiness, full of disbelief that this was my life and this woman was about to be my wife. She was growing my baby inside her. Life was fucking unbelievable!
“…Armand and Ella have prepared their own vows. Armand,” Mother Erica said, nodding at me.
We turned to face each other, hands joined. Sniffling, I began, “Ella, you’ve changed my life. You’ve helped me become a better man, a better human. You’ve taught me about patience and sacrifice. You’re my paradise, my oasis, my shelter from everything that scares me. You’re my dream come true. You’re proof of what love can do. I love you. I love you, and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life showing you and our baby how much. I’m yours, only yours…forever.”
Ella smiled at me as she lifted our joined hands to wipe tears from her face. “Armand, you’ve given me so much more than I could’ve asked for. You are my heartbeat, my sunshine, my happiness, my safe place, my dream come true. I love you so much, and I will love you in this life and the next. Thank you for being mine and only mine.”
After we exchanged rings and our kiss had ended, I thought I would explode with pride when Mother Erica said, “I present to you all, with the blessings of the ancestors and in the love of Spirit, Mr. and Mrs. Armand DeShawn Daniels! Asé!”
Our witnesses enthusiastically agreed, “Asé!”
Well, everyone except for Ella’s Uncle Lee Chester did. He very loudly yelled, “Ashtray!”