One day at a time. Wasn’t that the right motto?
It was hard, not just because I struggled with my own issues, but to see my kids having a hard time, too. They both seemed content to stay with me—even Ethie, though I made sure she spent every day with Gram and the coven. It would be her responsibility one day and I wanted to be sure she understood that as clearly as I hadn’t at her age.
But, it was different for Gabriel. I could feel his frustration at his constant failure to uncover the pieces of Creator. There were still three stray pieces missing, from what I could tell. The ear, the eyes and the soul were outstanding, and Gabriel couldn’t track any of them. The three we did know about—the arm, heart and foot—were in hands not our own. Belaisle’s sorcery was clearly hiding the known piece he had in his possession, Jean Marc’s as lost in the dark as he and the Brotherhood. Which made me worry Belaisle, or other of my enemies, had the rest in their grimy paws, too.
And Trill? Well, I wasn’t holding my breath my son would find the heart she took until she wanted to return it. If she hadn’t given it to Belaisle already.
No one blamed Gabriel. Which, of course, knowing my son and how much like me he was as much as his father, only made things worse.
I just had to trust what Max said, that Creator would make sure the pieces were found. That Fate would guide me. If only Zoe Helios would show up and reassure me that was the case, I wouldn’t have felt so anxious.
My attempts to contact Piers continued to be rebuffed, but I’d reached the point where I refused to give up on anyone. He’d either come around eventually on his own or I’d become such an annoyance he’d have to deal with me. I caught myself grinning a time or two into the quiet of the cavern as I shot the Steam Union leader a cheery good morning through the veil before leaving him alone to stew.
I wasn’t trying to be mean, really. But he was going to talk to me if it killed him.
Sunny and Uncle Frank still had their hands full with vampires, though the former queen confessed to me the influx had slowed and, in fact, their numbers were slowly shrinking again. Fear was high, but hope remained she could save them. I only wished I could remove the pressure from her shoulders such dependence was causing.
At least she had Uncle Frank to lean on.
Sunny never voiced her fear out loud, but it crossed my mind many times, so it had to be doing so in hers: what happened when all the vampires were gone to the void? And, why them and the spirit magic?
Just once, I would have loved more answers than questions. Just for variety.
I could only hope the same diminishing was happening to Dark Brother’s army. While I had zero illusions about our ability to defeat the Order, at least if their numbers were knocked down to, say, close to the ranks of the remaining drach, we might at least hold them off for a little while.
I’d give myself an ulcer with all those what ifs.
Instead, I focused on what I could change. Or, at least, influence. My plan to sneak the Kennecott healer twins into a delegation of werewolves visiting the World Paranormal Council headquarters won me nothing. Both Lula and Phon reported back regretfully they could find nothing physically wrong with Femke, though neither had been able to get close enough to her to confirm that.
I could have forced the issue, gone and scooped the WPC leader up and dragged her somewhere I could give her a good shaking and going over, but Mom suggested caution. Quaid’s reports Femke seemed even more withdrawn and the disappearance of Everonus from the council gave me bouts of nervousness and relief in equal measure.
I’d hit that problem head on as soon as I decided what impending disaster fit where on my game plan.
As for my daughter, I was proud of her. She seemed to be taking her responsibility as coven heir seriously. Though Gram told me in confidence she was now worried the girl had gone too far the other way, Sassafras was pleased with Ethie’s commitment, so I trusted him to keep an eye on her.
Payten had been keeping her distance in wake of the renewed warmth between Quaid and myself. I actually found I enjoyed having him as a friend without the pressure of the magic that once controlled our feelings for each other. His new wife, however, seemed to sense I wasn’t quite as open about her shacking up with my ex the way she did.
Made me wonder what kind of mom she would be to my kids. And gave me a horrible moment that almost made me puke.
Oh. My. Swearword. I’d have to co-parent with the woman.
Shudder.
All of my attempts to reach Alison and Sebastian again failed. Not that I expected success, but a little give and take on the whole Fate thing doling out dribs and drabs of info would have been nice.
The black ribbon protested every time I tried, doing its best to keep me safe. And while I still had no idea why a drach soul from the other Universe would want to protect Doombringer, it wasn’t leaving my wrist without major surgery or death. And since I only ever sensed support and kindness from it, I had to believe it had my best interest at heart.
Or was some kind of planted spy from Dark Brother merely lulling me into false confidence about our little relationship.
Paranoid? You betcha.
At least my sister was mostly over being mad at me. When I contacted her to fill her in on everything that happened, she ended the conversation with a lisping rendition of my nickname as a farewell. Her giggling did my heart good, even if I was pretty sure that joke was going to get old fast.
Mom stood her ground against the other councils, though I was on standby, knowing things would have to come to a confrontational head at some point. It wasn’t Femke who was the issue, but the other territory leaders. It pissed them off to no end their own witches were now demanding equality.
Progress in the witching world? Go figure.
The only problem with this kind of progress was the way it was being handled. I knew from talking to Quaid and Charlotte there was a great deal of unrest in the covens of other territories, propaganda making rounds for the status quo while the world teetered on the brink of a witch rebellion. And while I was all for change… really? They had to do this now?
Sigh.
At least Charlotte, as werequeen, and Sunny, who finally came forward and claimed her place as queen of all vampires—I could just hear Moa’s cursing at her temerity—were stable voices on the WPC, some of whom were demanding Femke march on their own people to keep them in line.
From time to time I thought of Tallah and wondered what her plans were. But I just couldn’t bring myself to care what the selfish coven leader was up to. As long as she didn’t interfere with what I was doing, she could have her privacy.
For now.
Zoe Helios, on the other hand, I actively pursued, as much as Trill and Belialse. Wouldn’t you know, the Fate of this Universe was conspicuously absent? The longer she avoided me, the madder I got. Well, fine then. If she wanted to be like that. Not even Fate would get in my way.
Didn’t do much to ease my worries about the whole Doombringer situation. I woke some nights in a cold sweat, without a clear vision of the nightmare I’d just endured, only knowing I’d been on the brink of making a choice and couldn’t, stuck in limbo forever, unable to decide.
I think once I actually reached the point of choice, it would be easy. I was already over the way it haunted me all the time. So impatient.
My vampire was fond of reminding me of that fact.
More riddles, the puzzle of Trill Zornov. Did she betray me or, with Zoe stepping in to stop me, did that mean Trill really was on my side and I’d been getting in the way of Creator’s plan? Seriously, if the mother of the Universe wanted me to take care of her business, she had to give me something I could work with already.
Every time I put finding Liander Belaisle and Eva Southway at the top of my growing to-do list, something else came up. So much so, I second guessed the choice every time I considered it, then growled to my alter egos about my hesitation. This whole wondering if Fate was making things happen around me was really starting to piss me off.
What I really needed, what would actually be helpful, was a way to track Belaisle and Jean Marc. Maybe through the pieces, maybe through their sorcery. Something. Anything.
Creator. Throw me a bone.
Jean Marc’s discovery and elimination would help me kill two birds. By saving the Steam Union, and, if I could figure out how he was switching sorcerous allegiances, by finally eradicating the Brotherhood forever.
That would be the sweetest revenge against Belaisle of all.
I missed seeing Max all the time, the hum of the drach song that I didn’t realize permeated everything they did until it wasn’t there anymore. Of course, I could see them any time I wanted just by going to the Stronghold, and did. But it wasn’t the same.
Jiao had half moved in with me and the kids, seemed to adore them as much as they loved her. I never expected my quiet and serious lóng friend to have any kind of maternal instinct, but apparently her attachment to her sister and brother translated into caring about my kids. Though, I noticed more and more frequently, it wasn’t Ethie or Gabriel she spent her time with--but the human form of Sassafras she bent heads with over books from the archive.
I refused to speculate. But, when Jiao laughed and Sass laughed with her, my heart smiled.
The nights I didn’t have nightmares, I dreamed of flying. And woke at times with tears on my pillow. I’d tried to take drach shape, in private, not wanting Max to know if I failed. Which I did, over and over again. To the point I stopped trying.
I missed my wings.
But, I’d promised my sister, and myself, and, in the silence of the night, Liam and Creator and everyone I loved, I wouldn’t run again. That I would see this through, do my best, as always, stumbling and falling and picking myself up only to carry on. Until it was done and I could be free.
And go for good. Because I knew, as I’d known for a long time, I’d outlive the ones I loved. So, maybe my drach form was a gift, after all, from Creator. A way to escape the loss of my mortal ties when the time came.
I slept every night in the bed I’d shared so briefly with Liam, hugging his pillow to me. Whether a trick of my mind or the cavern’s need to remember him, too, it always smelled of him, of fresh earth and fabric softener, and even when I woke in tears or in terror, a few deep breaths while holding that pillow and I could fall back into a deep and peaceful sleep.
Even gone and lost to me, he continued to take care of me.
Now, if only I could get past sitting at his desk, staring at the two of us on his laptop wallpaper. Fighting the need to cry all over again.
Baby steps.
###
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Next in the Hayle Coven Destinies
Will Syd’s pursuit of the missing pieces of Creator
lead her where she should fear to tread?
Find out in Book Six
The Order
Coming Soon!
***
About the Author
Everything you need to know about me is in this one statement: I’ve wanted to be a writer since I was a little girl, and now I’m doing it. How cool is that, being able to follow your dream and make it reality? I’ve tried everything from university to college, graduating the second with a journalism diploma (I sucked at telling real stories), was in an all-girl improv troupe for five glorious years (if you’ve never tried it, I highly recommend making things up as you go along as often as possible). I’ve even been in a Celtic girl band (some of our stuff is on YouTube!) and was an independent film maker. My life has been one creative thing after another—all leading me here, to writing books for a living.
Now with multiple series in happy publication, I live on beautiful and magical Prince Edward Island (I know you’ve heard of Anne of Green Gables) with my very patient husband and six massive cats.
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