23

A Latin jazz band opened the show and enthusiastic partygoers took to the small dance floor doing salsa and mambo, dancing in the aisles when the floor became too crowded as they gyrated to the driving beats and sensual rhythms. Waiters couldn’t keep up with the requests for drinks and refills even as they dodged around. Sequins flashed and heels clicked to the beat.

Xavier and Rita had front-row seats. Xavier saw to her every want. Drinks and food flowed throughout the evening. Xavier was the perfect gentleman and an excellent dancer. Never once did he give her the impression that he was the vicious crime lord she’d heard about.

Xavier’s hand was at the small of her back as they left the lounge.

“I hope that you enjoyed yourself,” Xavier said.

“I had a wonderful time. Thank you.”

“Perhaps a nightcap … in my suite”

She turned to him, keeping her smile in place. She reached out and ran a manicured nail across his jaw. “Another night. Maybe tomorrow Besides, we have this entire cruise to get to know each other,” she said in a husky whisper.

The right corner of his mouth flickered. He raised his hand, and his bodyguard appeared.

“See to it that the lovely Rita gets to her cabin safely.”

“I’m a big girl. I’ll be fine on my own. Independent, remember”

He brought Rita’s hand to his lips. “Until tomorrow, then.” He turned and walked away, his other two bodyguards flanking him on either side.

Rita released a breath and walked in the opposite direction to her cabin.

When she opened the door, Jinx was sitting on the bed, like a father waiting up for his teenaged daughter to come home from a date.

She closed the door and tossed her purse on top of the dresser.

“You didn’t have to wait up,” she said, taking off one shoe and then the other. She put them in the closet.

“I wanted to hear about your evening.”

She faced him. “Do you, really”

“Yeah, I do.”

“How about we start with you showing up at the table like some jealous boyfriend. Do you know you could have blown the whole thing” She turned her back to him. “Unzip me, please,” she asked, her tone softer.

Jinx got up and unzipped her gown in a series of slow pulls, kissing her spine with each inch that was exposed.

Rita groaned. It would be so easy to simply screw his brains out and sidestep what she was sure was coming.

He eased the spaghetti straps off one at a time, caressed her shoulders. He kissed the back of her neck and relished her soft moan.

“Maybe I was jealous,” he said softly, and then unfastened the gold clip holding her hair in place. Her hair fell in soft waves across her shoulders. “Would that surprise you”

“Yesss, it would.” She arched her neck while his hands glided over her hips.

“Why Don’t you know how I feel about you, Rita”

She turned around into his arms, looked into his questioning eyes. “No. I don’t know how you feel about me.”

The statement was so innocent, it took Jinx by surprise. “How could you not know, baby Tell me how you couldn’t know.”

Rita lowered her head. “Because no one ever cared about me, Jinx.” She looked straight into his eyes. “Nobody but Eva. Men wanted me for what they thought they could get between my legs, and I guess I thought that was some kind of love, ya know.” She moved away from him to the other side of the room.

“I’m not other guys, Rita. I thought you knew that by now.”

Pain showed in her eyes when she looked at him. “I don’t know how to be any other way than the way I am—who I am.” She turned away.

“I wouldn’t want you any other way. I know about your past, and I don’t care.”

She vigorously shook her head. “No, you don’t.” Her arms instinctively wrapped around her body. Why couldn’t they just fuck and forget all this introspection

Jinx came up behind her. Cautiously he put a hand on her shoulder. “Then tell me, Rita. I want to know what you think I don’t already. And whatever it is, I guarantee you: it won’t matter. What will matter is that you’ve let it go and trusted me enough to put it in my hands.”

Something inside her broke—the wall, the distance, the lock on her heart. She couldn’t be sure. All she knew was that she couldn’t hold the floodgates closed any longer. She didn’t want to.

She crossed the room and slowly sat down on the side of the bed. She folded her hands in her lap, the top of her dress held up by the rise of her breasts.

“It was never easy…,” she began.

*   *   *

“I was worried,” Jake said, keeping his voice even as his wife paced the room.

“No need. I can take care of myself.” She looked at him. “Most of the time,” she added, her voice cracking. She swallowed. “But I don’t want to. I want us to take care of each other, Jake.”

He came up to her, ready to grab her and make all the worry in her face go away. But he hesitated. Sex had always been the quick fix, the easy remedy, the turn-on that turned everything else in their life off—at least temporarily. And as much as he wanted her, he didn’t want the real issue between them to get murky, obscured by lust.

“So do I,” he admitted. He slid his hands into the pockets of his pants.

Eva expected him to reach for her, to hold her and tell her how sorry he was. Instead he acted as if he didn’t want to be near her. Her stomach knotted with dread. She drew in a breath then turned her back to him.

“I got inside Suarez’s cabin.” There, they were back on solid, familiar ground.

Jake frowned, unsure he’d heard her correctly. “You did what”

“I got in his cabin.” She pulled the piece of paper with the sketch out of her pocket and tossed it on the end table. “That’s the suitcase that I found stashed in the closet.”

Jake barely glanced at it from his side of the room. He was still working on putting together in his head what she’d told him. All this time he was worried that she was off somewhere brooding about what went down between them, and instead she was breaking and entering into Suarez’s cabin—something he’d been unable to do. He wasn’t sure what pissed him off more.

“You … you got into his cabin and got a sketch of the briefcase”

She spun toward him, her face pinched as if her feet suddenly hurt. “What part of what I said didn’t you understand”

“The whole thing.” He folded his arms across his chest. “How”

“How what” She snapped her neck to the side.

“How did you get in”

“I lifted a master key card from one of the housekeeping staff like I was supposed to do from the jump.” She did a mime routine of her handiwork. Her smirk was triumphant. “It’s what I do.”

He snorted more in amazement than annoyance. “So much for technology, huh”

“Sometimes we have to go back to bare basics.”

They looked at each other.

“I’m sorry, baby,” Jake murmured. He moved toward her.

Eva withdrew from him. “What are you sorry about Sorry about how you feel” Slowly she shook her head. Hold me, she cried silently. Hold me and tell me it’s going to be all right.

“No. That’s not what I mean. I can’t help how I feel, but I can help how my feelings hurt you. I don’t want to hurt you. You know that.”

Her gaze snapped up to meet his. “I don’t know anything. I tell you that I’m pregnant. I didn’t even get an ‘Are you sure it’s mine’” she taunted, sarcasm turning her voice harsh and raspy. She sniffed. “So I’m not really sure what you’re sorry about, Jake. And you know what It doesn’t matter.” Her shoulders slumped. “You need to go over that sketch. Maybe you can figure something out. I’m going to take a shower and go to bed.” She started for the bathroom. “And I’d appreciate it if you slept on the couch.” She opened the bathroom door and shut it firmly behind her, turning the lock on the knob.

She pressed her forehead against the door and set free the tears that she’d been holding all night.

*   *   *

Rita and Jinx talked long into the night, sharing pieces of their past that they’d never told anyone other than Jake and Eva.

Rita felt suddenly lighter, as if her spirit had been set free. Jinx didn’t cringe or turn away when she told him about the men, the hotels, the jobs, the money. He didn’t loosen his hold of her when she told him about the sordid things she’d done and what she’d allowed to be done to her—hoping that this man would be the one to stay. All the time that she talked and cried and talked, he listened, murmuring softly to her, holding her tight, telling her that it was okay.

She in turn listened to him tell of his childhood, the loneliness, the fear, the having to grow up before his time, of never feeling worthwhile because there was never anyone to tell him otherwise.

“Let’s make a pact,” Jinx said.

“What” Rita whispered into the night.

“Let’s start our life today. Fuck what happened yesterday, last week, last year. We put all that behind us and start working on a new day.”

She turned around in his arms to face him. “It’s not going to be easy.”

“Not much is.”

“The only thing I can promise is that I’ll try.”

He brushed her lip with the tip of his finger. “That’s all I ask.” He hesitated. “I’m in love with you. Have been for a while.”

She didn’t respond.

“And maybe one day if you let it happen, you’ll feel the same way about me.”

How could she tell him that she already loved him and that she’d been running from it for years Running and running, afraid that if she slowed down, his love would catch her. And then what would she do She’d have to love him back … or leave him.