THE ATTENTION AROUND town was intense and unrelenting. Even when it wasn’t, even when it was just a glance over the top of a magazine, it was suffocating. I had to change my phone number. I barely went outside. I watched entire seasons of television in the span of a day. I was drinking a lot, more than I should, more than anyone should.
Hunter left me. She took a job in Connecticut and moved away. A fresh start for her and an excuse for communication between us to become even more infrequent. She told me she didn’t want to waste this opportunity for a second chance. I wanted to be happy for her, but I was bitter and I was jealous. I never told her the truth about Jenny and Mark. I considered it, knowing it would derail her “second chance” and keep her close, but I didn’t. It would be petty and selfish, even for me. Instead, all I could think when she wouldn’t return my calls was a very sarcastic You’re welcome.
I should have moved away. I knew that’s what I should have done. I always said I would, even before Jenny’s murder. I just had to figure it all out. This town was impossible for me now. I didn’t have to move far, just far enough to not be the story—just far enough for my own fresh start.
I think I was close, close to actually taking action. I’m not sure what I would have done or where I would have gone, but I’m convinced I was on the verge of doing something, finally, without help, just me, doing something to change.
THEN IT ALL RELAXED. There was a new story and I was overshadowed in an instant. A popular senior girl from one of the town’s notable families had committed suicide—Billy Castleton’s little sister. No one knew why. A new mystery. A new dark cloud over the town. A fresh tragedy that had absolutely nothing to do with me. I could go outside again. I could stay a little longer—just until I figured things out.