The girls spent the next hour logged in to Paris’s social media accounts as they launched Operation Find Kyra a Boyfriend.
“What about this one?” Paris asked. The girls looked at his photos and read his profile.
“He’s cute,” said Tig. “But all these pictures are of hunting and fishing. Kyra’s an animal lover. She’d hate that.”
“I’d bet money that if she thought he was interested,” said Robbie, “she’d be out in the deer stand with him.”
Tig smiled. “You’re probably right,” she said. “But if this plan is going to work, we’ve got to find Kyra the perfect guy. Then she’ll forget about being mad at us, feel better about her parents, and get happy again. Then we can put this drama behind us once and for all.”
“What about this one?” Paris asked.
Tig looked at the photo. “He looks all right,” she said. “What’s his story?” Tig read his profile. “What is he, a genius or something? Looks like he’s the president of every academic club in your whole school.”
“Pretty much,” said Paris.
“What makes you think he’d be a good match for Kyra?” asked Robbie.
“For starters, I think he’d be interested in her,” Paris said.
“Why’s that?” asked Tig.
“He’s kind of girl crazy,” said Paris. “I think he’s asked out almost every girl in eighth grade, and even a few seventh graders.”
“So he gets around a lot?” Robbie said.
“No, that’s just it,” said Paris. “He asks, but they say no.”
“Has he asked you out?” said Olivia.
“Oh yeah,” said Paris.
“And what did you say?” asked Claire.
“I told him no way,” Paris said. “It was the homecoming dance last year, and I said no for a couple of different reasons. First of all, my daddy’s not about to have me going on dates in middle school. So I couldn’t have gone even if I’d wanted to.”
“And why didn’t you want to?” asked Claire.
“Because,” said Paris, “he’d already asked four other girls ahead of me. I couldn’t have said yes; it was a matter of self-respect. I don’t play second fiddle.”
“Or fifth fiddle, apparently,” said Robbie.
“All right, let’s say your dad would’ve allowed you to go to the dance with him and he’d asked you first. Would you have said yes then?” asked Tig.
“No,” Paris replied.
“Why not? What’s wrong with him?” Robbie said. “He’s not uncute.”
“Milo’s . . . I don’t know . . . different,” said Paris. “I just don’t need a guy who tries that hard. Besides, he’s hard for me to talk to.”
“What does he do, sit there and talk about nuclear physics?” said Robbie.
“Not exactly,” said Paris, “but I’m sure he could if he wanted to. It’s more like he just can’t help but put some geniusy spin on everything. Like one day, somebody was talking about some murder story he’d seen on the news, and Milo started comparing it to some novel the seniors in high school have to read for the advanced placement class—something Russian, a hard-to-pronounce writer’s name.”
“Dostoyevsky? Crime and Punishment?” Robbie asked.
Tig laughed. “Maybe somebody else we know would be a better match for him,” she said. Robbie lightly shoved her.
“Yeah, I think that was the name of it,” said Paris. “And nobody knew what to say, because, of course, none of us knew what he was talking about. So everybody just kind of stopped talking after that and wandered off in different directions. I mean, the guy knows how to clear a room.”
“So does Tig!” Robbie said. “Hey, maybe she’s the better match! Tig, you could play ‘Gotcha’ for him!”
“Burn!” said Olivia.
“Shut up, Chan!” Tig said, even though she couldn’t help but laugh a little.
“Oh, you guys, it’s too soon,” Claire said. “Don’t make Tig feel bad about that again!”
“What are y’all talking about?” asked Paris.
“Just my public humiliation last spring when I tried to throw together a show when Claire was sick and Robbie was out of town. It didn’t go well.”
“I’m sorry,” said Robbie. “I couldn’t resist.”
“You owed me one,” said Tig. “Fair is fair.”
“Anyway, back to this Milo fellow,” said Claire.
“Yeah,” said Paris. “So he’s super-intellectual—there’s that. But also, he’s so honest.”
“Honest is good, isn’t it?” asked Olivia.
“Not always,” said Paris. “See, Milo’s really good at math. I mean really good. He’s gotten a perfect score on the math section of every standardized test we’ve ever taken. One time the governor even came to present him an award because of it. And I think because he’s so good at math, he thinks everything is just a problem to solve. He doesn’t know how to leave well enough alone, so he keeps on running his mouth even when he oughta hush up. Like that time he called me and asked me to homecoming. Do you know what he told me?”
“What?” the girls asked.
“He said, ‘I’ve already asked four other girls who said no, and you were the next girl on my list.’”
The girls started giggling.
“No, he did not!” Olivia said, aghast.
“Oh yes, he did,” said Paris.
“And yet you were able to resist him?” Robbie said. “A charmer like that?”
“See? That’s what I mean,” said Paris. “He doesn’t know how to play it cool or flirt or hang back. His brain is so big, it’s like everything is an equation, and he’s got to solve it the quickest way there is.”
“What makes you think he’d want to solve Kyra’s equation?” asked Tig.
“Well,” said Paris, “Kyra’s cute. I think he’d go for her in a second.”
“But would she go for him?” asked Claire.
“He’s not bad-looking,” said Robbie. “And Kyra’s all about what other people think. Since she’s not at Paris’s school, she wouldn’t know that Milo isn’t considered cool. She’d give him a chance and get to know him. Sounds to me like they could both benefit from a clean slate.”
“Good point,” said Tig. “I just wonder if they’d have anything in common.”
“That’s the best part,” Paris said. “That’s what made me think of him. Kyra’s bummed about failing at music, and Milo, smart as he is, actually failed at something recently.”
“What? Curing cancer?” asked Robbie.
Paris laughed. “No, but something almost as serious down here in the South: football.”
“Really?” asked Olivia.
“Yep. He went out for the team and didn’t make the cut. Probably the only thing in his life he wasn’t the best at. I’m sure it stung. So he and Kyra have that in common—they both got cut from something because they didn’t measure up. I think they’d understand each other.”
“I think it’s worth a try,” said Tig. “Now, how do we go about introducing them?”
“I know just what we’ll do,” said Paris.