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Matilda
I press my lips to his for a kiss before I pull back and look at his handsome face. “I love you.”
“I need to hear you say that at least ten times every day, Matilda.”
I laugh. “Does that mean you’re moving back in?”
His gaze scans the three cardboard boxes I piled up in the foyer. “Are those my things?”
I nod as the corners of my lips dip into a frown. “I couldn’t stand the thought of your belongings being so close to me. I wanted to sleep in your bed every night, but the pain was too much.”
“You’ll sleep in it with me tonight, won’t you?”
“Can we talk about something first?” I sigh. “In so many ways I feel I know you better than I know myself, and in others, I feel like I’m wandering through a fog.”
He takes a deep breath, pausing before he answers. “We can talk about anything you want.”
“You don’t want to be a lawyer, do you?”
“You spoke to Ronald Dixon about me.” His eyes flick over my face. “You asked the Dean of Admissions at NYU Law to personally consider me for the program.”
I manage a smile. “I thought I was helping make your dreams come true, but I know that it’s not your dream anymore.”
“I was touched, Matilda. I was deeply touched that you spoke to him on my behalf. No one has ever gone out of their way to do anything like that for me before.”
“I believed, at the time, that I was helping you.” I bow my head. “I know now that you have a new path ahead of you.”
He saw the letter in my hands in the bedroom. I know that he did.
“Somewhere along the line, the drive to be the best homicide detective I could be was replaced with a need to do more.”
I don’t say a word. I want him to continue.
“About a year ago I was invited, by a friend, to attend the hiring ceremony for new recruits.” He speaks softly. “They were all starting a new chapter in their lives. I remembered what it felt like for me the day I was hired, so I talked with a few after the ceremony and handed them my card.”
“Did you hear from any of them?” I ask out of pure curiosity.
“Almost all of the recruits I offered my card to, called me.” His gaze travels to his cell phone that is sitting on the coffee table. “At first, it was strictly questions. They wanted to know what to expect once they came out of the academy and then it turned into more.”
“In what way?”
My question draws his heavy brows together. “They needed to talk to someone who had been there. They all have resources that are provided to them by the department, but they needed a friend who had been there and I became that to them.”
“You still are, aren’t you?” I reach to grab his hand.
“The woman you asked me about meeting. Her name is Hillary.” He looks down to where our hands are joined. “She was responding to a break and enter when the perpetrator pulled a weapon on her.”
I see the pain in his eyes. I know her experience must have taken him back to the day he was shot. “Is she all right?”
“He backed down.” His shoulders drop. “It was a tough experience for her. The threat of death can break a person down.”
“I can’t imagine, “ I respond quietly.
“Another rookie stepped into the middle of a domestic dispute and was faced with a distraught victim.” His hand grips mine tighter. “He was in a tough situation and handled it well, but it was a lot to deal with.”
“Is he okay?” I ask, hearing the hope in my voice.
“We meet for coffee at a diner near his place every couple of weeks to go over that day.“
“Does that help him?”
He nods. “I think it does. He’s been to see one of the department’s therapists which has been invaluable, but sometimes all he needs is a buddy who gets what he’s going through.”
He makes his role in all of this sound simple and inconsequential. He’s providing his colleagues with a level of support that is invaluable.
“There’s a program the department runs for rookies. It pairs them up with a veteran.” He kisses my knuckles, one-by-one. “You need to be a sergeant even to be considered.”
I smile. “Lucky for you that you passed that sergeant test.”
“I haven’t been assigned anywhere yet, and likely won’t be for months, but I want in on that program if it’s possible. I want to work with rookies during their first days on patrol. I want to help them find their rhythm. I’d like to give them a base to build on that will carry them throughout their careers. I met with the department head last week to let him know that I’m very interested.”
“If I didn’t love you already, I’d fall in love with you at this moment.”
“Fall into bed with me, Matilda.” His lips brush against my cheek. “Let me show you how much I love you.”
