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Rafe sat back on his heels, flipped the switch, and swore when nothing happened. Stupid delta-company, geek-squad geniuses. You'd think they could build their toys to last. Or at least be transported. Not everything could remain in the lab forever. He speared a hand through his hair, which was getting too long for his taste. He really thought the loose connection had been the problem. Resetting the sensitivity for the perimeter sensors had been easy compared to this supposedly “ready to go” relay. There were reasons people thought R&D stood for “Reckless and Disappointing.”
With a sigh, he reopened his set of micro tools and took off the relay’s access panel.
"Everything okay?" Nafisi was using a collection rig to vacuum up the dust from around the kennel. Under the polarized lights, he could see as well as hear part of her pack of wolves playing in the yard. It made him think of the pup, JJ, and out of habit he glanced toward the pen. Nafisi had helped him move it outside once the storm had died down. It beat abandoning the wolf in the house while they both worked around the ranch. Besides, the wolf was going to have to get used to all kinds of terrain if he was going to be successful once he'd bonded with a ranger.
"If I had wanted to be an electrical engineer, I'd have gone into that." He looked down at his hands, which dwarfed the tools he needed to fix the relay. Like all rangers, he was trained to be self-sufficient, but every ranger had strengths and weaknesses. That was the point of fireteams, so they could have a spectrum of capabilities. He understood electronics, but there was a limited repertoire of things he could try in an effort to make them work. "I'll get it figured out."
Nafisi smiled at him. "Of course you will."
The praise made him think of her touch in the kitchen, and the way it had made him all too aware of her presence. Yes, he’d noticed her before she’d announced herself, had felt her watching him, but the touch felt like a step toward something. He gave himself a moment to gaze after her as she went back to work. She had an easy way around the wolves that made him jealous. After losing Actaeon, he didn't know if he would ever be 100 percent comfortable around them again. He could command the rangers, but it was different being on the outside. Every wolf felt like something he was missing. Seeing them and not being able to share in their emotions left him longing.
Reminded him of things he wasn’t allowed to have anymore.
Nafisi bent over to clean some of the dust out of the crawlspace behind the kennel, the fabric of her suit stretched across her hips deliciously.
On the topic of things he wasn’t allowed to have. Yeah, there was that as well.
Rafe turned his attention back to the bird’s nest of wiring inside the communications relay. All of the connections seemed solid, which meant there either had to be a break in one of the wires or a fault in one of the processors. Hopefully it wasn't the latter. Wiring he could replace, but new processors? That was out of his jurisdiction. He grabbed a multimeter and started testing each of the wires.
He shouldn't have let Nafisi distract him. She'd made it clear she only tolerated his presence because the wolves were in danger. And even that was barely. Besides, after what she'd been through with her husband, she needed someone who could actually connect with her emotionally. He was burned down. Hollowed out. The Ghost, some of the rangers called him when they thought he wouldn’t find out.
She had enough ghosts already.
And there he was again, acting like a slick-sleeve, all full of fantasies and forevers. She and he were both grown-ass adults. If they felt a little physical attraction, they could deal with it, or not, as they both agreed. It didn't have to mean anything more. Couldn't mean more, even if he wanted it to.
He found the broken wire and removed it, careful to note how it was connected so he could replace it. He'd just soldered in one connection and was about to start on the second when a surprised yelp from the pen launched his heart into his throat.
In a flash, he was standing over JJ. Nafisi ran up beside him half a breath later. She reached past him, careful as she lifted the pup and held him out. "Little help please?"
He took JJ from her, uncomfortably aware of the way his hands had to brush against hers in order to take charge of the wiggling mass of fluff. The brief contact made his skin tingle and heat creep up the back of his neck.
She carefully examined JJ's paws, stopping at the left foreleg. "Here we go. He cut one of his footpads on something. I've got some SkinSeal in the med bay. I'll be right back." She jogged off toward the kennel before he could respond.
Rafe nuzzled down against the back of JJ’s neck. "Looks like we get to bachelor it up for a few seconds. Want to help me finish my work?" He tucked the young wolf into his shirt, front paws hanging over the collar, and walked back to the relay. It was a quick effort to put the remaining connection in place, and he hit the switch. This time, the relay hummed to life. He wouldn’t be sure it was working until he tried hailing the Hunting Cry from Nafisi’s communications setup, but at least everything looked the way he'd been told to expect.
"See? I knew you could do it." Nafisi beamed as she walked up. She used a squeeze tube to apply a thin bead of SkinSeal to the wolf's paw. "That should hold him until it heals."
The praise made him self-conscious, and he focused on the pup instead. "I'll take him inside, just to be safe. How much more do you need to do out here?"
She glanced around, and he could see in the slump of her shoulders that it was plenty. "Need to do? Or want to do? Some stuff, like replacing that guy line that tried to kill you, is going to require more time than I have. Fortunately, I've got two other generators, which should be sufficient until I can bring that one online. Why?"
He smirked. "You said I was responsible for dinner. I figured I would need to know when to have it ready."
Something sparked in her eyes, and they softened a moment later. "Far be it from me to turn down a meal. Tell you what, though. You go on, and I'll finish up the kennel. Maybe fifteen minutes, then I’ll be along to help."
The thought of working alongside her in the kitchen raised all kinds of red flags, but he ignored every one of them. "Sounds like a deal."
#
NAFISI NEEDED A SHOWER. The survival suit helped some, as did the respirator filters, but the truth of the matter was that the dust got into everything. Beneath her clothes, she felt caked in grime, and she looked forward to the idea of a long, hot soak to get the cold ache out of her bones. She flirted with the idea of asking Penzak to scrub her back—it might just send the old ranger scrambling. But he might also take her up on the offer, and she couldn’t decide which outcome appealed to her more.
Both outcomes disappeared when she saw him.
Penzak stood in front of the ranch’s memorial wall when Nafisi made it back to the house. Gener had been opposed to the idea originally, but she had insisted. Said that it reminded them to do their jobs right so that the wolves would be good at their jobs and could save others.
Now she wasn’t so sure. Every muscle of Penzak’s body looked stretched to breaking; his shoulders pulled down like he’d collapsed under the weight of the Three Systems. It was the great idiosyncrasy of the few rangers she’d met—like the wolves to which they bonded, she found that she had little trouble reading their emotions. Whether they wanted her to or not.
How had Penzak put it? It's just me. So much pain tied up in three simple words. Despite herself, she wanted to lessen the burden. Wished for some way to help him move through what she personally knew to be agonizing. She stepped up behind him and put her hand over his shoulder with a reassuring squeeze. "How long ago?"
"Six years," he whispered. His voice was thick, and his throat sounded as though he’d been gargling sand.
She nodded. "Can you talk about it?" That was the worst part. Even though the Forces recognized PTSD as a risk for both man and wolf, there were few things rangers could share with their counselors. Many of the missions were classified, and security clearances didn't grow on trees. Worse, like most high-octane men, rangers tended to avoid therapy as a sign of weakness. Bullshit and stupidity, of course, but then those often went hand in hand for the TJF.
He surprised her by answering. "There was an assassination threat against several high-profile leaders at the summit on Khonsu. Rangers and wolves were on high alert, looking for bombs, guns, whatever. The guy had hacked his fabber to print an Old-Earth-style slugthrower. He’d only get one shot, but that’s all he figured he needed. We should have been checking for that too but hadn’t.” Penzak took a deep breath, then let it out slowly. “He pulled his weapon. My wolf jumped to protect me. The bullet tore through his heart, killed him instantly."
She could feel him tremble beneath her hand at the remembered emotion. The wolf hadn’t suffered, and she was thankful for that, but snapping the wolfbond without warning... The loss could leave massive trauma in its wake.
She stroked her hand down his back absently, like petting one of her wolves. Despite her earlier thoughts, there was nothing sexual about it. Just one human comforting another because they both knew how it felt to lose half of their soul.
"There aren't words." Nafisi swallowed. "Nothing anyone says makes it better. And some of the stupid shit people say only makes it worse, but you're supposed to smile and act like you're grateful that they could dispense some nugget of bullshit wisdom that they found on the ’Net somewhere. Truth is, everyone grieves alone. May I ask..." She inclined her head toward the wall and hoped he understood.
"Actaeon." He reached up and tapped the picture on the wall "God damn, but he was a beautiful wolf."
He certainly had been. But that was the double-A litter all over: clever, strong bonders, and big, barrel-chested wolves. In polarized light, their conformation was tremendous. And their skill in training... Yeah, she could see him with a double-A. Wolf and man would have been well matched.
She glanced toward the pen where JJ was sleeping and debated whether or not to tell him. Whether or not the truth would be too cruel.
She voted for honesty. “The double-A's were special all right. We keep gametes from every wolf, just in case there are traits we want to highlight in another generation. We’re already doing the fertilization in-vitro, so it saves time for us. Double-J is a direct line litter from double-A."
Penzak turned to stare at her, and she could read the confusion and uncertainty in his eyes. He worked to piece it together aloud. “So JJ is..."
"Genetically? He's something like Actaeon's grandson."
He looked so stunned. So simultaneously filled with joy and despair, she wasn't sure how to react. Against her better judgment, she went up on her tiptoes and pressed a quick kiss to the corner of his mouth.
It was like he’d been released. She held her breath for a second, then he lowered his lips to hers again. Nothing swift or hurried about it—he explored. Teasing and tasting, as though trying to memorize every reaction he could draw from her. Then, like a ranger who had studied the terrain, he claimed.
Familiar but long-ignored hungers fluttered to life in her belly, and she dragged her fingers through the short hair at the back of his neck. She lost herself in the strength of him, surrounded by the careful circle of his arms. She felt desired for the first time in too many years, and the idea scared her as much as it heated her blood.
One broad hand curved over her backside, grinding her against the evidence that he was equally aroused, and the delicious sense of being crushed against him made her gasp.
Ever the ranger, he took advantage of that too. Shifting from her mouth to the exposed skin of her throat and destroying her control with each clever nip of his teeth or brush of his mouth. His hand skimmed from her hip up her side, and alarm bells went off.
Wait, those were actual alarms. He released her and stepped back, and her skin ached for the lost contact. His amber eyes were alert, darting toward the front of the house. “That’s the perimeter alarms.”
“It’s too soon for another storm.”
“It’s no storm,” he said quietly. “It’s Triptych.”