79. Actively Appreciate it All.
This is where it ALL starts.
Always be grateful. I just heard this year from my friend Jesse that instead of being grateful, it’s better to actively appreciate .
This means that you’re going out and finding things that fill your heart with gratitude on days. It’s proactive when gratitude seems passive. My friend, Jesse, pointed out that the root of the word, “grateful,” is from the Latin “gratis,” which means free. If you’re receiving something (reactive) free (versus being proactive and APPRECIATING) then you might feel obligated, or that you owe something back to God or the Universe.
When you go out and do the work of appreciating, it’s an effort on your part. Just sitting back and allowing gratitude to come to you is much more reactive. It’s a thought worth considering. I find truth in it.
An appreciative heart opens the door for more blessings. If you look at any situation, problem or difficulty, there is always, always something good in it. So look for it, and thank God and others for what you are and what you have.
Something that I really enjoy is looking for even the minor things to truly appreciate.
Did you have warm water this morning on a cold day? Many people before your time couldn’t have these things. These little things are miraculous to me, and therefore I appreciate them.
Dean Graziosi gave a presentation while I was at Genius Network that talked about this. His advice was: “Lower the bar of gratitude in your life.”
“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”
— attributed to Albert Einstein
Good Lord! Do you realize how freaking blessed we are? Do you understand that no matter what comes our way in life, we can CHOOSE to appreciate? It’s a mindset.
Some people are naturally more appreciative than others. You’ll also find that they tend to be better to hang around than those that love to complain. Mandy, you’ve dealt with those unappreciative people a lot at Starbucks. They live with an entitled mindset. They take things for granted. Honestly, they’re unhappy people. They feel entitled, and when they aren’t given something naturally, they become easily disappointed.  
The good news is this:
The art of APPRECIATION can be learned and cultivated. It’s not just something that you ‘have’ or don’t have. You can train in it. You can develop it like a habit and a muscle. Do you get that? It can happen—and it makes SUCH a big difference in your life!
I mention this ad nauseum because it’s so profound and struck such a chord in my soul: Appreciation and anxiety can’t live in the same head. If you’re worried about things, if you’re feeling entitled or like things should be set up perfectly for you, it’s probably likely that you’re not actively appreciating enough in your life. You need to do this.
I tell you to question everything and come up with your own opinions on what I say and write to you. Do that. But honestly, I can’t think of any reason to NOT be more appreciative in your life. I think this is an absolute good.
Here are some ways to do it:
Realize the importance of appreciation:
Do you do that already? Can you see the difference between the people that live in this enlightened state versus those that don’t? Can you feel the difference it would make in your life? Does it feel better to live in gratitude or entitlement?
You know the answer, but I want YOU to understand and appreciate the importance of being thankful. I want you to appreciate and savor life! 
Know that you can change :
If you don’t live in appreciation, or do it consistently, or are actually a pretty miserable sonuvabitch (you’re not, but if you were . . . ), then you’ve got to know that there IS a better way of living, and that you can tap into that.
It’s within your reach, and it’s possible to achieve and attain it.
Systematically and relentlessly add appreciation into your life:
To get into the habit of appreciation you need to make it . . . well . . . a habit. It must be a part of your daily schedule. I feel so good telling you this because my appreciation game is completely on point. Man, I love life! Here’s some of what I did to get that way:
Start the day off with active appreciation. I write in my five-minute journal each morning within a minute or two of opening my eyes. This is important to get it in that semi-wakeful state where it mystically melds with that subconscious mind. Doing this first thing proactively starts your day with counting your blessings.
It also benefits your soul to have its “Appreciation Antennae,” up at all times. The five-minute journal asks: “What are you grateful for?” (We’ll forgive them not asking what you actively appreciate.) I love this. It starts the day right.
It has three spaces. I write the first thing that comes to mind with the first space, then I write something that seems relatively minor, but really is a big blessing—like the warm water example from above, or the fact that you get to live in the comfort of freedom. The last one is something that I really like to think on and I reach for it. A friend, an experience that has already happened, and even if it feels weird, an experience that will happen are good points to start from. This process trains the brain. It gets it operating the right way from the start of your morning.
Lately, I’ve also start writing down something that’s ‘bad.’ It can be an obstacle, or something bad that’s happened. It actually forces me to think why this can actually be a blessing. It’s a powerful practice. If you get to the point where you can appreciate even the bad things that happen, you’re acing this life lesson.
Then, during the early evening my iPhone alarm goes off with, What a Wonderful World , by Louis Armstrong. This is probably the perfect song for this by the way. The alarm says, “Remember that you are blessed.” I know you’re in my presence a lot when it goes off, and I try to stop what I’m doing. I close my eyes, think of all of the things that I appreciate, and what a truly wonderful life it is. I’ve even had that alarm interrupt me at times when I was feeling bad, and it immediately changed my mood.
Often, I’ll also include a coin in my shoe during the day. I got this from my dear friend Dr. Scott Law, and have been using it for years now. It reminds me to be kind, but to also smile and appreciate things in life. Every time I feel that coin move, which is often, it serves as a reminder, or a trigger. It happens a lot .
Finally, at night—in my nightly ritual before bedtime, my daily planner has a space on it for “Active Appreciation,” for the day. I fill it in, and often have five or more things that I list out. I put in great things that may have happened that day, or just more things that I appreciate. Sometimes these are even things like my muscles being sore after a workout, because I have muscles, mobility, and a BODY that can do work. Doing this at night creates a nice little bookend to my day. It starts and ends with appreciation.
The frequency of the times of appreciation are important. Mind you, I have three scheduled times for it, and the variable coin routine—and I’m doing great on my appreciation of life. So, if you find yourself struggling with appreciation, set more alarms and times and start sticking to them. The difference it will make in your life is absolutely amazing.
And you deserve absolutely amazing. I love you, my precious babies!
The Advice in Practice: