I ran outside, but Sam had disappeared. There were a few people leaning against cars in the parking lot, but not Sam. My heart raced. Jonathan! Or Melissa! Maybe one of them knew where Sam had gone.

I hurried back inside. Melissa was square dancing, so I knelt down to talk with Jonathan. “Sam went to check on Penny, but she’ll be right back.”

Penny! I should have thought of that. Sam and Penny had a barrel racing competition the next morning.

Lifting my long skirt, I rushed back outside. The lantern lights kept me from tripping, or stepping in horse manure.

When I got close enough to see her, Sam was hugging Penny. She spoke to her in such a low voice that I couldn’t make out the words.

I waited until Sam finished talking. “It’s me.”

Sam gasped and her eyes widened. “What are you doing here?” Her voice cracked.

“I had to tell you I’m sorry.”

“You already said that.”

“And … and I wanted to ask you if we could back up. If we could go back to that day in your barn when I gave you the friendship bracelet and you said you didn’t like anybody else as much as me.”

“A lot has happened since then.”

I thought about how scared I had been the night she ran away. How my heart had broken when Mom didn’t understand, the hopeless feelings when Sam had quit the basketball team. I thought about Coach Murphy and Miss Holt, and how I was still scared about the future. But mostly I remembered my last session with Dr. Nichols. “My counselor said I could pretend my feelings for you don’t exist, but then I’d never be as happy as I could have been. I don’t want to be like that.”

“Me either, but it’s complicated.”

I always hated when adults said that, but it turned out to be true. Liking Sam was messy and complicated.

“Aren’t you worried about hurting your mom?”

“Mom is coming around.” Sam’s parents probably never would, but I didn’t say that out loud.

“Are you sure about this?” Sam asked. “What about Coach and Miss Holt? Being gay is hard.”

“I know.” I took a deep breath. The answer was deep inside, just like Reverend Walker had said it would be. “But not being myself is even harder. Mom and Dad will help me. I know they will.”

Sam smiled in the lantern light. “Then maybe we need to start over.”

“You mean back to the very beginning?”

“Yeah.” She stuck her hand out like a politician. “Just call me Sam,” she said. “I know all the kids at DB, so you must be new.”

I shook her hand. “Allison Drake.” My voice came out all scratchy like I had a frog in my throat.

“Ribbit, ribbit,” Sam said.

“Ribbit, ribbit,” I answered. I was usually shy around people I didn’t know, but something about Sam felt different, right from the start.