The 12 Sleighs of Christmas

and last but not least: sleigh repairs!

A team goes in to check the sleigh,

stored here since last Christmas Day:

a simple tune-up, wash and wax,

check the runners, then relax.

Tim, Crew Chief and Head Mechanic,

swings the doors wide—and then: PANIC!!!

The sleigh is totaled, smashed, and battered!

The elves are rocked! They’re shocked!

The worried elves all gather ’round.

Some shake their heads. Some gasp. Some frown.

They could only guess.

They size up the tremendous mess . . .

And soon, every elf mechanic

is so excited . . . shouting! . . . frantic!

(Each is sure that their design will be divine—the most fantastic.)

Then they all begin to bicker:

Which design is cooler? Quicker?

And so a dozen teams are set,

they crowd around and make a bet:

which team can build the coolest sleigh

for Santa’s use that special day,

that awesome day’s most awesome ride?

A build-off!—And SANTA will decide!

With Christmas Eve just days away,

work is quickly underway.

Behind closed doors, designs are sketched

and then supplies are quickly fetched—

all sorts of odd and wondrous things—

gizmos, motors, wings, and springs.

Around the clock, they race full tilt,

they go warp speed, to get them built.

Welders spark in the dark;

hammers bang, tools clang . . .

all night long,

going strong.

Grinding, buzzing, clanking,

whirling, twirling, cranking . . .

a squeal, a honk.

A BONK!

A splat? A quack?

Build Team One reveals

a DRAGSTER sleigh that really squeals

(with gliders, though, instead of wheels).

And in a blink, it’s gone, so high,

racing comets through the sky.

And just as fast . . . it’s back. Chute POPS!

Slowing, slowing . . . till it stops!

Flip the engine switch—and HISSSSSS!!!

Team Two decides

that the sleigh that Santa rides

should be a BIG RIG: MOUNTAIN SIZED!

A tricked-out semitruck that flies.

A tractor trailer, customed out,

just right for hauling toys about . . .

a gleaming grill and giant stacks

(and a sleeper cab, if Santa naps).

And under the gigantic hood,

whoa! Now this is really good:

a huge twin turbo, diesel-fueled

inline six-thousand, blizzard-cooled.

The giant engine makes it fast,

air horns sound a giant blast,

headlights shine through any storm,

and heated seats keep Santa warm.

And it continues:

Team Three’s been working feverishly . . .

Finally, that elf team unveils

a floating ship with fifty sails.

And the clever crew, so wise,

has very thoughtfully devised

a telescoping arm and hand,

so Santa never needs to land.

Team Four’s creation,

a fantastic combination—

part blimp and part hot air balloon,

part rocket-made-to-touch-the-moon,

part hot rod car, for extra zip:

something inspired

by the big trucks that they’ve all admired:

a snowplow front for clearing sleet,

a tractor cab for Santa’s seat

(complete with heat, to stop the chill,

and cup holder, so his drink won’t spill),

bulldozer tracks, a dump truck back,

and turbo blast, to make it fast.

the Team Six invention:

And so on and on it goes.

aquatic, atomic, gigantic inventions—

flying saucers, trucks with wings,

all sorts of clever, crazy things.

Pulleys, levers, secret rooms,

gizmos, gadgets, levers, booms,

engines, runners, gliders, tracks,

high-tech, souped up . . . to the max!

Santa just cannot believe

what the elf teams have achieved!

He looks at each craft carefully,

amused and proud as he could be.

And with a jolly laugh, he says:

But . . . nothing seems exactly right,

not quite perfect (just . . . not quite)

for this very special night.

But the smallest member of Tim’s crew

had known just what he had to do.

He’s been working privately,

as hard at work as one can be,

on a secret back-up plan.