Kate parked her new ute between two other four-wheel drives in the main street. Sliding from the driver’s seat she noted the splashes of red dust and mud on all three vehicles, and a satisfied glow worked its way up from her toes until it bubbled over into a contented smile. It soon vanished when she glanced up to find Matthew Unterheinner striding towards her. Her first instinct was to run, but she immediately clamped down on that emotion and straightened her shoulders.

‘Morning.’ She greeted him with a bright smile, even though her heart was dropping at the sight of his thunderous scowl.

‘What’s this I hear about you opening some hippie retreat on your place?’ he demanded without preamble.

‘It’s not a hippie retreat, it’s—’

He cut her off with an impatient bark, ‘So it’s true then? You’re bringing city folk out to North Star and turning it into some organic, hoity-toity greenie place. I would have thought young Beaumont would have had more sense in his head than to get involved with some harebrained scheme like this.’

‘It’s just a holiday farm stay.’

‘People around here won’t take too kindly to you threatening their livelihoods.’

Threatening their livelihoods? What was he talking about? ‘How is my starting holiday accommodation going to ruin anyone else’s livelihood? If anything it’ll bring in money to the rest of the town,’ she said in exasperation.

‘This bloody organic meat fiasco you’ve got planned is going to affect every other grazier in the district. You’re not going to be happy until you’ve ruined the lot of us, are you? Do you have any idea how much your good-for-nothing grandfather cost me over the years because he was too damn useless to keep his property under control?’ He was radiating such animosity that Kate almost took a step backwards. ‘And now you’re going to follow in his footsteps. While everyone else around you is spending a fortune on pesticides and doing the right thing by keeping the damn weeds under control, you’re just going to sit back and do bugger-all.’

‘That’s not true. Nathan knows exactly what he’s doing, and if you’re so worried about spending a fortune, then maybe you should go organic too. There are non-toxic products that everyone can use.’ Kate felt proud of herself for knowing all this. Her reading and research had paid off for once.

‘None of that natural crap works—you may as well go and sing Kumbaya to the bloody weeds, it’ll have the same effect.’

Kate opened her mouth to speak but was cut short by a deep voice calmly cutting in. ‘Morning, folks, how are we all today?’

Unterheinner looked up but his face didn’t soften. ‘You’ll be hearing from me,’ he promised Kate before he stalked away.

‘You all right, Kate?’ John asked quietly. She saw the concern in his eyes belying his calm demeanour.

‘I’m fine.’

‘What happened?’

‘It was nothing—he’s heard about my plans for the farm stay.’ She gave a small shrug. ‘Apparently he objects.’

John searched her face briefly. ‘I’ll have a word with him if you like.’

‘No, don’t. I already have enough trouble fitting in here, I don’t need to have him telling everyone I’ve got you fighting my battles for me as well.’

‘I’m the cop around here. It’s my job to fight battles on behalf of my flock.’ He grinned.

‘I think you’re confusing your profession with a minister’s,’ Kate said.

‘Some days it’s not too far off, let me tell you.’

They shared a smile and Kate felt a flutter of excitement, which immediately wiped the smile from her face. ‘I’d better go; I’ve got heaps to do.’

‘Can’t tempt you to have a coffee?’ he asked.

She shook her head. ‘I can’t today, I have a business to get up and running.’ And a heart you’re not going to get your hands on, mister, no matter how gorgeous you are. She turned and headed towards the grocery store, fighting an urge to look back to see whether he was watching.

That afternoon an ecstatic Liam returned home from school with the news that the following night they would be camping at the waterhole. Before Kate could question him further, Jenny rang and explained that the boys had convinced Nathan to take them camping and she had suggested that maybe they could all go along. ‘If it’s all right with you, that is. I mean, it’s your waterhole,’ Jenny laughed.

Kate was not thrilled by the prospect of camping down by the waterhole overnight. Really, why would a sane person put themselves through an uncomfortable night sleeping on the ground when they had access to a perfectly good bed at home?

‘Come on, Kate, it’ll be fun. Remember when we used to camp out?’

Yes, she remembered. She’d hated it then too. Their tent was a blanket draped over a low branch, and their bed a plastic sheet. The sense of adventure would last until dark set in, after which she would spend a sleepless night waiting for the whole thing to be over.

‘Camping would imply that we actually had tents, sleeping bags and the right gear. It was just lucky it was in summer and all we did was sweat to death and get eaten alive by mos- quitoes. In winter we would have frozen.’

‘It was a bit rugged, wasn’t it,’ chuckled Jenny. ‘We’ll do it in style this time.

Kate relented. ‘Sure, sounds like fun,’ she lied.

So, the vehicles loaded with equipment, they set off the next afternoon to make camp. Even Georgia seemed in high spirits, and Liam was so excited he didn’t stop talking once.

The waterhole was a gorgeous spot. Huge pandanus and melaleuca trees shaded the riverbanks, and the water was deep and clean, swelling out into a wide waterhole before gently tapering to a narrow creek as it crossed over into the Unterheinner property next door. This was what made North Star such a valuable property—it had such an abundance of water.

With tents erected and firewood gathered, the happy sound of children splashing in water filled the quiet solitude of the surrounding bushland. Seated comfortably in fold-out chairs, drinks in hand, the three adults watched on indulgently as the youngsters swam.

The rumble of an approaching engine drew Kate’s attention and she got to her feet in alarm when she saw that it was John, in his police car.

He rolled to a stop as she came towards him, flashing a warm grin. ‘G’day Kate.’

‘Is everything all right?’ she asked, half expecting bad news.

‘As far as I know . . . Why?’ he said, stepping from the vehicle then leaning into the back seat to drag out a swag.

Kate stared at the swag, and then turned to face Jenny, who winked at her, then waved to John.

‘Hey, you made it. Great, you’re just in time for a drink.’

‘I take it they didn’t mention I was invited to the camp-out,’ John said, closing the door with a thunk. ‘Do you mind?’

‘No. Why should I?’ Kate asked, surprised.

‘I get the feeling I make you uncomfortable.’

She was taken aback by such a direct comment. ‘I . . . it’s just that . . . I’m not used to men like you around the place.’

‘Men like me?’

Kate felt her face redden and groaned inwardly. She was a grown woman, with children—why did she always act like some silly schoolgirl around this man? ‘Men in general . . . it’s nothing personal. You’ve been great since the day we arrived, it’s just that I haven’t had a great deal of experience with men, other than my husband . . . Socialising, that is.’ Her face grew hotter. ‘What I mean is, I don’t really have any men . . . friends.’

His warm smile made her close her eyes in humiliation.

‘Let’s go have a drink . . . And, Kate,’ he said, waiting as she reluctantly turned to look at him, ‘for what it’s worth, I don’t plan on always being just your friend.’

She stared at him dumbfounded. Well! she thought with a touch of indignation. We’ll just see about that!

As the sun sank lower, the men lit a campfire, then cooked sausages and steak over a portable barbecue. Liam wolfed down three sausage sandwiches in a row, and watching his glowing face, Kate couldn’t help smiling.

‘You look content,’ John observed, taking a seat next to her, his hands full with a steak sandwich and a can of beer.

‘I am,’ she said, and meant it.

‘How’s the ark plans?’

‘The ark?’

‘I hear you’ve been gathering animals two by two to stock this place.’

Kate grinned. ‘Just call me Noah. It’s going really well. I have eggs! And I can get almost a whole bucket of milk out of Betsy,’ she said with a note of pride in her voice.

He clinked his can against her plastic glass. ‘Not bad for a city chick.’

The tranquil beauty of the evening was broken by a sudden sharp crack and Kate spun about in shock. A little way from the fire Nathan was giving the boys a demonstration of whip cracking. A second crack was followed in quick succession by three more.

John glanced up at Kate and his smile faded. ‘Kate?’

With each crack of the whip, a sound like gunshot reverberated through the air and she flinched as though feeling each lash.

Nathan finished his demonstration and extended the handle of the whip to an awestruck Liam. ‘Here, mate, you have a go.’

Immediately Kate sprang to her feet. ‘Put it down, Liam.’ Her voice was quiet but very determined.

‘Mum, Nathan’s showing me how to crack a whip, did you hear it?’ Liam’s eyes were bright with excitement and anticipation.

‘Where did you get that?’ Kate stared at the whip in her son’s hand, her thoughts not on the fine craftsmanship or the skill Nathan had shown using it, but on darker, more painful memories of this particular family heirloom.

Noting the strange expression in his mother’s eyes, Liam lost some of his enthusiasm. ‘I found it out in the shed the other day.’

‘Put it away, Liam,’ she said, her face tightening.

‘But Mum—’

‘I said, put the damn thing away . . . now!’

Everyone looked at her in surprise, their faces uncertain.

‘Kate, it’s just a whip,’ Nathan said reasonably. ‘He can’t get hurt with it while he’s learning, it’s not that dangerous.’

‘Get rid of it,’ Kate said, her tone leaving no room for argument.

‘All right, Kate. It’s gone,’ Nathan said placatingly. He gently took the whip from Liam’s hand and held it up to show her it was all over.

Liam stared up at her with accusing eyes, before Matt called him over to play spotlight, distracting him from his threatened outburst at this injustice.

Now the incident had been defused, Kate felt drained and shaky. She noticed Jenny pulling Nathan aside and talking softly to him. She turned away, feeling baffled eyes following her, and began to busy herself clearing away dishes.

As she worked, she cursed herself for reacting so strongly. She’d managed to alienate both her son and Nathan in the same fell swoop. She must seem like a nutcase. What a fool, to think she would have become immune to the effect this place had on her.

‘Kate.’

She jumped at the sound of Nathan’s voice and looked up into his set features.

‘I need to clear the air.’ He hitched his thumbs through the belt loops at the front of his jeans. ‘Jen explained a little about the situation with your childhood, how things here weren’t always . . . good, and I know you’re not used to the way we do things out here. You’re used to worrying about your kids, and rightly so, considering where you’ve come from. But this isn’t the city. Out here it’s okay to let kids do stuff. You’re not doing Liam any favours by babying him, you know.’ He paused, as though bracing himself for the tirade to come.

Kate didn’t respond straightaway. When she did, it was in a quiet voice that seemed to float in the air between them. ‘You were wrong when you said it was just a harmless whip . . . I watched Henry use that whip on an animal once. Have you ever seen the damage a whip can do to an animal’s hide?’ She heard his sharp intake of breath. ‘And it doesn’t do a person much good either,’ she said, pulling the collar of her shirt aside so he could see the top of the raised ugly scar that was hidden there. ‘I know all about that whip and how harmless it is.’

He muttered a soft curse and his eyes seemed to be shadowed in dismay. ‘Kate . . .’

She turned and headed towards the portable camp sink to wash up. She lifted her hands to see that they were shaking. How could she have forgotten about that incident all these years? She hadn’t thought of it again until just now, hearing that horrible noise.

When she was seven, she had been outside playing by herself when she’d heard a bloodcurdling yelp. Racing towards the stockyards, she’d been horrified to see Henry whipping one of his dogs. It was scampering back and forth, trapped in the corner as Henry snapped the whip again and again. Screaming for her grandfather to stop, she’d run, unthinking, between Henry and the dog and caught a stinging, burning welt across her shoulder.

She recalled the pain now, remembered lying in the dirt, sobbing. Above the roaring in her ears, she’d heard her gran screaming at Henry in a way Kate had never heard before, then gentle hands had helped her up and led her inside. When she came out the next day, the dog had disappeared, and so had the stock whip.

The rustle of branches nearby startled her from her memories and she glanced up to find John arriving with more plates.

‘See, I’m even domesticated.’ He flashed a grin that made her heart flutter again.

‘So I see. I can finish all this, go sit down.’

He handed her the plates he’d collected but she fumbled and dropped them to the ground. ‘Damn it.’ Dropping to her haunches, she gathered the plastic dinnerware, angry at herself for getting so flustered around this man.

Hunkering down beside her, John began to help. ‘Kate . . .’

His gentle tone caught her off guard. She swallowed. His face was so close she could see the flecks of silver surrounding the hazel of his irises. He smelled of wood smoke and outdoors, and as he leant towards her she felt the merest brush of his warm breath against her lips. The fire popped loudly and she blinked, pulling away as she remembered where she was and, more importantly, who was around.

‘I’d better go finish cleaning up,’ she said, jumping to her feet and turning away.

Behind her, she heard John let out a slow, heavy breath.

‘Where’s Liam?’ Kate asked as she headed across the clearing towards the girls sprawled by the fire.

Georgia gave a half-hearted shrug without lifting her eyes from the iPod she was sharing with Amy.

‘Georgia! Where is your brother?’

Pulling the earphone from her ear, Georgia stared up at her mother in irritation. ‘I don’t know. I haven’t seen the little brat since dinner.’

He’d been sitting by the fire last time she’d checked, before she’d got distracted by John and his damn eyes . . . 

With a nervous feeling inside her stomach, she realised that both Liam and Matt were missing. Jenny looked up as Kate called out Liam’s name.

‘Kate?’ Jenny said questioningly.

‘The boys aren’t here.’

Jenny walked over looking unconcerned, and once again Kate felt like an overprotective parent.

‘They’re probably just playing spotlight,’ Jenny said.

‘They weren’t supposed to go far from the campsite after dark,’ Kate muttered, trying not to panic.

‘No, they weren’t.’ Jenny’s tone held a promise of a stern reprimand when the boys returned. Turning away, she called out to Nathan, who was sitting back from the fire talking with John.

‘Yes dear, you bellowed?’ he joked, wandering over with a coffee in his hand.

‘The boys aren’t answering. I think they might have wandered off too far for this time of the night.’

Nathan flicked a glance towards Kate and saw the anxiety shadowing her eyes. ‘I’ll go have a look for the precious chicks and have them back with their mother hens in a jiffy,’ he promised. Stopping to collect a spotlight, he headed into the tree line, calling out his son’s name.

John came over and searched Kate’s worried eyes. ‘He hasn’t been gone long?’

She shook her head. ‘I don’t think so. He was here earlier . . . surely no more than fifteen minutes ago.’

He gave a confident nod and smiled. ‘They won’t be far away.’

After a while, Nathan came back, his face having lost its relaxed expression. John walked towards him and the two started talking quietly.

Kate began to panic, she couldn’t stop herself. ‘What?’ she asked.

‘No sign of them,’ Nathan said briskly. He began looking for more torches and called the older kids over. He threw John a torch and Jenny picked up the lantern they’d been using to light the table as they ate.

They spread out in a rough line and made their way in the most likely direction the boys would have taken through the bush. After calling for over an hour, they returned to the camp and John radioed for assistance.

Kate sat down beside Jenny, too afraid to open her mouth to ask questions, certain she’d turn into a blithering mess. She forced herself to be calm. Straightening her shoulders, she focused on remaining positive. Liam was with Matt, and Matt was a country kid, born and raised around these parts. He’d know what not to touch and where not to go; all they had to do was locate them.

Then, from out of the bushes, came a stumbling, sobbing child.

Nathan dropped the map he was holding and ran towards his son, gathering him in his strong arms and hugging him close.

Liam wasn’t with him.

After satisfying himself the child wasn’t hurt, Nathan pushed Matt away and looked into his eyes. ‘Mate, what happened?’

‘We were playing spotlight and Liam went to hide. I couldn’t find him, and when I called out he didn’t answer me. I told him the game was over, but he still didn’t come out.’ His chin wobbled slightly but he shot a quick look at his father’s face and seemed to straighten his shoulders and steel himself. ‘I told him I was going back to camp and he better hurry up and come out, but when he didn’t answer I got worried he was really lost and I didn’t know what to do.’ He turned worried eyes upon Kate and she saw his lip tremble. ‘I didn’t want to leave him out there alone, but I couldn’t find him.’

Kate summoned a smile to pacify the anxious child, even though inside she was quaking at the thought of her own child all alone out there in the dark. ‘You did the right thing coming back. We wouldn’t want two of you out there lost,’ she assured him.

Jenny took Matt back to the fire to warm him and Kate had to bite the inside of her cheek to stop the sudden wail that threatened to rise up in her throat.

The men began trying to deduce from Matt’s information the area they’d need to start searching and Kate stood back, wrapping her arms around herself to fend off the chill that had begun to creep its way through her body. Lost in her troubled thoughts, it took a moment to register that someone had slipped their hand into the crook of her arm.

Kate’s eyes brimmed with tears at the sight of her daughter staring up at her with large frightened eyes. She gathered Georgia to her, and they held each tightly and took comfort from each other in a way they hadn’t done in years.

John finished speaking with Nathan and Matt, then headed back to Kate. He took her hand in his and made her look at him. ‘Kate, it’s going to be okay. I’ve got men coming in to help search, they’ll be here as soon as they can. We’ll find him.’

Kate nodded, and tried to smile her thanks, but the tears fell and she dropped her head in her hands. Kate felt Georgia’s arm around her shoulders and was grateful to have her daughter by her side.

Lights bounced over the paddocks in the distance and soon there was a steady influx of vehicles and men, ready to search for a little boy lost in the bush.

Kate watched as John stood in the centre of the group and handed out maps and instructions, organising the search party with a calm yet urgent manner that went a small way to reassuring Kate that everything was going to be okay.

Two hours later, Kate made her way towards John, standing at the back of his police vehicle which served as the makeshift control centre for the search.

‘I need a torch. I can’t sit here any longer. It’s killing me. I need to do something,’ she told him huskily.

‘Kate, the men know this place better than anyone. I know it’s hard, but you’d be more of a hindrance than a help out there in the dark. They’ll find him.’

‘It’s been two hours! How far could he have gotten in such a short time? Why can’t they find him?’

‘The scrub out there is thick and it’s dark. It makes the going slower.’

Jenny brought over two steaming cups of coffee and handed them one each. The radio continued to burst into life every few minutes as groups checked in, and John kept track of everyone’s progress. Kate stayed by his side.

As the night wore on, a chill crept into the air. Kate shivered involuntarily and John reached over the back seat, grabbing a blanket to wrap around her shoulders.

With a shake of her head, she tried to push it away, tears falling again as she thought of her baby out in the dark, freezing in his board shorts and T-shirt.

‘You won’t be any use to him if you make yourself sick,’ John told her quietly, tucking the blanket back about her and draping his arm across her shoulders for good measure as they sat on the tailgate of the vehicle’s tray.

After another hour had ticked past, she threw off the blanket and stood up. ‘I can’t stay here any longer. I’m going out there to search.’ One look at Kate’s defiant glare and John knew she wasn’t going to be talked out of her decision this time.

‘Okay, but give me a minute, I’m coming with you.’ He pointed to the map. ‘I have the men covering everywhere from here to here,’ he said, dragging his finger in an arc. ‘I’m thinking we should go in this direction, since they haven’t had any luck over there.’

Kate nodded distractedly. She was finding it difficult to take in information. She just wanted to get going.

There was no thick bushland to negotiate, but there were plenty of trees, the moonlight bouncing off their smooth white trunks in waves of liquid silver.

‘You grew up here, didn’t you?’ John asked.

‘On and off,’ Kate replied, knowing he was trying to distract her from her terrified thoughts.

‘Must have been great with all this as your backyard as a kid.’

‘I missed it when I wasn’t here,’ she said.

‘And you haven’t been back here before now?’

‘No.’

John glanced at her. ‘Your ex didn’t ever want to see where you grew up?’

‘You ask a lot of questions,’ she said, frowning.

‘Occupational hazard.’

There was a moment’s silence, with only the sounds of the night and their footsteps between them. ‘My ex isn’t a sentimental kinda guy,’ she eventually said.

‘How did you meet him?’

‘He came through my checkout one night.’

‘How old were you?’

‘Sixteen.’

‘Wow, so he was your teenage sweetheart?’

‘Something like that.’

‘You don’t like to talk much, do you?’ he said.

‘I thought that was every man’s ideal woman,’ she said dryly, looking around at the dark shadows, lit by their torches and the bright moonlight overhead. ‘Do you really think he could have come this far?’

John gave a slight shrug. ‘It’s not impossible, he’s been gone a few hours. It depends whether he’s walking in circles or not.’

‘It’s such a big area to cover.’

‘If he’s mobile, then the longer he walks the harder it will be to locate him in the dark. We’ll have to wait until daylight to use helicopters. If we’re lucky he’s found a spot to sit it out and wait for help.’

John paused as he emerged from the trees into a clearing and Kate too busy watching where she was placing her feet, crashed into his back. The warmth of his body was a momentary comfort in the darkness.

Up ahead was the dark shadow of the old overseer’s hut and Kate was filled with foreboding. ‘He can’t have gone this way,’ she said. ‘Let’s go back.’

‘We have to check here first. Come on, it’s just an old cabin,’ John coaxed gently. Taking hold of her cold hand in his own, he led the way with his torch.

The old structure, its timber bleached a shiny grey by the sun, had a slight lean to it. Kate knew there were many of these old buildings on properties around the district. They’d once been used as either the original homesteads, or as shelter for drovers.

At the base of the single step leading to the front door, Kate stopped. ‘I’m not going in there.’

‘Scared of the dark, Kate?’ John placed his hand on the door and pushed it open, the doorknob having long ago rusted out.

‘Liam?’ John’s deep voice carried through the small cabin, echoing in the dark. Dropping Kate’s hand, he hurried forward.

In the corner huddled a small form, blinking against the shaft of torchlight.

‘Liam!’ Kate weaved around John, racing to gather the child into her arms.

‘Are you hurt, mate?’ John asked, dropping to one knee beside Kate.

‘I couldn’t find my way back to camp, then I found this place and thought it would be a good place to wait, but it was dark and I tripped and hurt my ankle.’ Liam’s voice trembled, but he fought back his tears bravely. ‘Am I in trouble, Mum?’

‘We’ll talk about it later—right now I’m just happy we’ve found you.’

John unclipped his radio and informed the others that they’d found Liam, before shrugging off the small backpack that contained first-aid equipment.

As John wrapped a bandage around Liam’s ankle, Kate felt his gaze on her. ‘You okay?’ he asked.

‘Fine. Are you almost finished? I’d like to get him out of here.’ I’d like to get the hell out of here, more to the point, she thought. There was an awful churning in her stomach, as though she was going to be sick at any moment.

‘Okay, champ, let’s go.’ John repacked the first-aid kit, handing the torch to Kate, then lifted the boy into his arms. ‘You go first, but watch where you’re walking,’ he warned her.

Kate couldn’t escape the musty-smelling cabin soon enough and took a gulping breath as soon as she stepped out into the clean, fresh air.

The trip back was faster and, as they approached, Jenny and Nathan came rushing towards them, relief flooding the campsite at Liam’s safe return. Kate glanced past the welcoming committee to see Georgia hovering uncertainly on the fringe of the crowd. For a moment mother and daughter’s gazes collided and held. Kate took a step towards the teenager but, at the movement, Georgia turned away, tapping Amy on the arm and together they wandered back to their tent on the far side of the camp. Kate watched their retreat with a twinge of disappointment. But there was hope. Tonight, for just a little while, the old Georgia had made an appearance, and the knowledge warmed her.