Chapter 5
Understanding your triggers

As we race through our lives it is easy to miss the warning signs that should alert us to impending dangers such as sickness, injury or burnout. Too often we hear of people who have been aware of a pain in their chest for weeks but have put off going to the doctor because they are just too busy — then the heart attack strikes.

Signs and symptoms

Of course these signs don't always mean we are at death's door, but they do serve to warn us that we need to slow down and take time out. Our body is the best indicator of when things are not right — we are beautifully designed like that. Signs of ‘not feeling right' that can be a precursor to illness include:

  • breathing difficulties
  • attention deficit
  • inability to concentrate
  • impaired memory
  • irritability
  • poor judgement
  • impaired communication skills
  • lack of coordination and slower reaction times
  • reduced visual perception
  • physical pain
  • tiredness
  • impaired decision-making ability
  • desire to be alone
  • lethargy
  • sore eyes
  • difficulty in relaxing
  • fidgeting
  • abnormal bowel movements
  • tightness in chest
  • withdrawal from environment or physical contact
  • clumsiness
  • tendency to move erratically between tasks
  • difficulty with task completion.

This is not an exhaustive list, and the signs and symptoms can manifest and result from many conditions. It is important you take the time to notice and listen to the messages your body is trying to send. If you are concerned about them or have been experiencing them for a while and it has been sitting at the back of your mind, contact a health professional today and get yourself back on track. When we take the time to listen to our bodies the messages can often be heard loud and clear.

Our bodies are designed to move and are capable of more than we yet fully understand. At the same time, we are also designed to rest. A healthy balance between activity and rest allows the body to perform at its best. If we persist in pushing through fatigue, upsetting this balance, we will find our body will simply demand the rest it needs, often through illness.

A healthy balance between activity and rest allows the body to perform at its best.

Beyond the physical signs that our body needs to switch off, our behaviours can also offer us useful insights into what is going on. Sometimes those behaviours can be a little scary; at other times we dismiss them as just part of life. When they become a permanent fixture in our life it is time to take stock of our health.

Behavioural indicators of when it is time to switch off may include any of the following:

  • You start to feel your chest tighten when you look at social media.
  • You ignore your email.
  • When your phone rings you snap at it to be quiet and leave you alone.
  • You don't answer your phone.
  • When you hear a knock at the door you hide in the kitchen and tell everyone to be quiet.
  • When asked what's for dinner as soon as you walk in the door, you yell like a banshee.
  • When you think about all the things you have to do, you feel like a great weight is sitting on your chest.
  • You stare at the computer screen like a deer caught in the headlights, not knowing what to do next.
  • You wake up at 3 am with so many thoughts and ideas in your head that you don't fall asleep again until just before the alarm goes off.
  • You are full of energy in the morning, then feel like curling up into a ball in the afternoon.
  • When asked how you are you talk off topic and incessantly.
  • When asked how you are you answer automatically that you're ‘fine'.
  • You realise your family hasn't had a meal together in weeks.
  • Your children ask you when you are going to play with them again.

It is important to take the time to notice when your body or your behaviours indicate it is time to switch off, and to do something about it while you have the ability to choose.

The 3 O's

People put off going to see a healthcare professional for a number of reasons, including being too busy, not being able to access a doctor quickly enough and cost. They try to research the condition themselves. Some delay a trip to the doctor out of a fear that there might be something wrong, but the delay can come at a cost, and that cost can be your health. We all know the saying that prevention is better than cure, just as early detection and prompt action are better than inaction. If you notice physical or mental changes that concern you, it is important that you consult a suitably qualified and experienced healthcare professional without delay. Doctor Google will not cure your ailments; in fact, it will most likely add to the sense of overwhelm and overstimulation you feel already.

It is important to remember that when experiencing any of the 3 O's of overconnection, overwhelm and overstimulation you are not performing at your best, and when you are not at your best, you cannot give your best to your relationships, your work or yourself.

Doctor Google will not cure your ailments; in fact, it will most likely add to the sense of overwhelm and overstimulation you feel already.

Understanding that people generally operate in one of three key states or zones can help you to better understand your triggers and recognise the signs warning that it is time for you to switch off. The three states are:

  • the Danger Zone
  • the Indifferent Zone
  • the Control Zone.

The Danger Zone

In the Danger Zone, as the name suggests, sickness, meltdown and shutdown threaten. When operating in this space your body and brain are in their least optimal state. This is where sensory overload and sickness will most likely occur as a result of prolonged exposure to overconnection, overwhelm and overstimulation.

In this zone you can feel irritable, tired, oversensitive, fuzzy headed. You are more emotional than you would normally be, crying or getting angry easily. Your breathing is shallow and fast, and you breathe from your chest.

Work situations, such as competing time pressures, high expectations or looming deadlines, and personal situations such as frequent arguments with your partner or dealing with prolonged behavioural issues with your children can push you into the Danger Zone.

No matter the cause, when you are in the Danger Zone you are no good to anyone. Your effectiveness is significantly diminished and your ability to make rational decisions is affected. It is crucial when in the Danger Zone that you immediately take the time to rest and recover, but notice the signs early and the negative impact can be minimised.

The Indifferent Zone

The Indifferent Zone sounds serene, but in fact you are sliding into an area that is the precursor to shutdown. Shutting down is very different from switching off. Switching off is a deliberate act: you are in control, choosing when and how to flick the switch based on your needs. When you move into physical and mental shutdown you cease to care about your health, you lack interest in your relationships and the quality of your work is compromised.

You know you are in the Indifferent Zone when:

  • your head rests on the table and you refuse to do any more work
  • you answer all requests with a listless ‘whatever'
  • you sigh deeply, with shoulders slumped (not the same as deep breathing!)
  • you just want to be left alone
  • you deflect responsibility
  • you don't see the point of tasks
  • your work output is poor
  • you don't put the effort you normally would into your work or relationships
  • you let your health habits slide.

When in the Indifferent Zone your care factor is zero and you do the bare minimum to get through the day. Once you hit this zone, you start to question whether what you are doing is worth the effort. People start to notice your withdrawal and lack of effort and to question your motivation and interest.

The Control Zone

The Control Zone is where it's at. This is the space where you are feeling on top of things, you have a spring in your step and life looks good. You are buzzing with energy, focused, and proactive in your work and relationships.

You know you are in this peak zone when:

  • you are feeling calm and focused
  • your jaw is relaxed and you are breathing regularly from your diaphragm (slow, controlled deep breathing)
  • your life feels organised and in flow
  • your projects are moving forward and you feel good about the progress you are making
  • you feel agile and able to respond to the needs of people and tasks
  • you have energy to spare at the end of the day
  • you make good decisions
  • you notice what is happening in your life and are able to adapt when needed
  • you smile a lot!

The Control Zone is the aspirational space where proactive decisions can be made in all areas of your life based on what you want to achieve. In this zone you feel agile, ready to respond to the unexpected, happy and healthy.

We can find ourselves in any of these zones at any stage of our life. At times it can feel as though one minute we feel in control but in the next minute totally out of control. This is a natural part of life, but prolonged experience in the Danger or Indifferent Zone can have detrimental effects on our health and wellbeing. There are ways to move between zones, to flick the switch to prevent you from slipping into the Indifferent or Danger Zone, but first let's see where you are at right now.

Life audit

How do you think you are tracking? If you are reading this in hard copy, grab a pen and complete the table that follows. If you are reading it online or on a tablet or have borrowed the book, copy or print the table or grab a piece of paper to complete the audit.

How we score in each of the 3 O's will fluctuate. A range of factors, such as our current workload, the support we are receiving and even our hormones, will play a part in how we are feeling at any particular time. Taking the time to take stock of where things may be going awry for us in a simple and honest way can unlock important answers concerning where we need to step back and where we are doing well. On an individual level, the specific factors that impact on our ability to switch off need to be explored further so changes can be made to break unproductive cycles of behaviour.

In the following chapters we will explore how you can switch off and then in part 4 how you can create a habitat for health, setting up your life to facilitate good health practices and allowing you to switch off when needed. Before we do, it is important to know when to switch on and off, and how to flick the switch.