14

Beau

Leaning back in a warm lounge chair, I feel as though my skin has actual real Georgia sunshine living within it.

I glance at Willow, who hasn’t spotted us yet.

“You’ve come to the pool because of her,” Charlotte says. “She didn’t invite you. Heard it myself through the open window.”

“We would have come to the pool anyway, and you know it,” I reply.

It’s a Saturday routine of ours. I glance at Pax and Grant, who are attempting to talk to a group of girls. Well, mostly Grant is making a fool of himself. Nothing new.

Charlotte laughs. “Fine, fine. You’re right. But the point is that you’ve been fixated on her, and that’s unusual.”

My sister’s not wrong.

“She’s not making it easy,” Charlotte says. “Aren’t you bored of it yet?”

“Not at all,” I answer honestly.

Charlotte hasn’t stopped harping on this.

“Do I need to remind you how worthless you are with her around?”

My sister’s comment stings worse than swamp yellow jackets. Still, I don’t let on how much.

“No.” I shift my gaze because someone has blocked my view of Willow.

“Like a sad little puppy, trotting behind. You used to always be grinning. Now I catch you looking like you’re deep in thought, transfixed. Your friends are here, in case you’ve forgotten. Why aren’t you over there talking to those girls with them?”

“Shut up, Charlotte,” I growl.

“Maybe I’ll warn her off, tell her some of the stories of all the girls you’ve made cry,” Charlotte whispers.

I whip around. “You can go to hell.”

“Oh, I’m sure I will,” Charlotte coos. “But not just yet.”

Her threat is empty, it seems, because she doesn’t move a muscle.

“I don’t actually need to tell her,” she continues. “Looks like she might be mad enough without my warning.”

I look up. In my distraction, I didn’t notice that Willow had spotted us. She and that friend of hers approach.

“Are you following me, Beau?” Willow asks, hands on her hips.

I smirk. “Now why would I do that? Far as I remember, it’s a free country. And by God, it’s a hot one. Which, incidentally, the pool helps with.”

It sounds almost as though my sister whispers, “Liar,” but I can’t be sure.

“Funny thing, you never mentioned you were coming when I told you my plans.”

Willow looks edible with her angry scowl and red bikini.

“Did I need to inform you?” I ask, cocking my head to the side.

Her skin is bronzed by the sun and shines with oil. She’s not as thin as some of the girls here, and I like that—the way her body curves and moves. Her hair sticks to her back, and there’s not another girl more beautiful.

“Usually that’s the sort of thing reserved for boyfriends and girlfriends,” I say. It’s mean of me, but as much as I want Willow around, I don’t need her thinking I’m all that into her. Even though I am.

I’ve never actually wanted a girlfriend.

This shouldn’t be an exception.

For a moment, the only sound between us is my hard exhalation of breath, then laughter, the spring of the diving board, and loud splashes join our silent conversation. Not once does Willow or I say what we actually mean.

I think she wants me here but won’t admit it.

I know I need to see her, but I won’t tell her that.

Our day is wrapped in false pretenses and tension, the illusion of control.

She huffs. “Fine, Beau. Enjoy your afternoon at the pool.”

I wish she would’ve invited me herself. I also wish that I didn’t want her to.

I watch her go. Her friend won’t make eye contact with me.

Beside me, Charlotte beams. “You are such a fool.”

“I’m five seconds from drowning you in that pool if you don’t shut it.”

A guy approaches Charlotte.

“Maybe I’ll ruin your chances here,” I hiss.

Charlotte laughs. “Go ahead. Unlike you, I don’t care. There are many more to choose from.”

Frustration laces through my thoughts. Charlotte can so easily dismiss them all. I used to be able to do that, too. Until Willow. I have a weakness, and my sister knows it.

The guy reaches the foot of her chair. He’s nervous but brave when he introduces himself, wondering if she wants to go for a swim. She tells him she’d love to. I’m relieved to see her go.

Now I can eye Willow in peace.

Willow takes a few steps into the Olympic-size pool. A group of guys rest their arms on the edge of a corner near her. One sits atop the ledge.

I can’t make out their words, but a couple of guys have approached. Jorie seems to enjoy the attention, and it doesn’t look like Willow is opposed to it, either.

My blood suddenly feels as though it’s boiling. Damn this sun.

I can’t look away. Willow smiles. Laughs at something one of them says. I worry she might like him, and that pisses me off. I don’t want those guys talking to her. She’s driving me crazy, and I don’t like it one bit.

I know the emotion I’m experiencing, though I’ve never actually felt it before. Well, maybe a bit the day in the hall when Willow agreed to a date with someone else. I’m definitely sensing it now. Disbelief punches my heart. Anger swarms, clouding my vision. I want to be allergic to this feeling, to stay as far as possible from it, to remain cold and neutral, but I can’t push it away. I don’t like it. I’ve seen it on other people’s faces. Never on my own.

Jealousy.

I have to put a stop to it right away.

I glance at the girl near me who won’t take her eyes off my face. And then I give her a full heart-stopping smile. She takes it as an invitation to join me. I don’t object.

She tells me her name. Blah, blah. I don’t care.

I glance at Willow, who is watching me back. I pretend to pay better attention to the girl in front of me. What was her name again? She moves in closer.

Five minutes pass. The girl continues to prattle on.

Ten minutes. Charlotte returns and begins talking to her.

I have to get Willow out of my mind.

The guy Charlotte met is part of the same group of friends as the girl next to me.

Twenty minutes. Charlotte invites them all to the house. There’s four total. I don’t catch their names because I’m too busy thinking of Willow.

I don’t want to let the words burst free. Go out with me, Willow. A real date. I’ll show you that I can be nice.

I’m dangerously close to speaking this out loud.

Damn, Willow. Somehow, she snuck into my mind. Maybe I will actually ask her out. Soon.