He needs someone better. I’m not for him. I’m weak, dirty.
Those words seared my mind as I lay in bed. Neither West or Lucas knew I had been standing in the doorway and that I’d heard. My chest ached at those words. I wanted to drag West into my arms and tell him he was all I needed. Despite knowing he wasn’t ready to hear it.
Instead, I would stay and worm my way into West’s life in other ways. I would have him see me as the man who would be there for him, and eventually, he would not be able to deny what we could build on between us.
Rolling, I stared at the wall that separated us. The house was quiet since most of the men had left. I’d even sent Dimitri home to sleep, after I promised I wouldn’t leave the house. I thought sleep would pull me under quickly, but it had not. My worry for the man in the next bedroom was too pronounced.
How could West think I needed someone better when all I saw was him? Eventually, he would understand he was not weak or dirty. He was perfect, even with his new scars.
I had an urge to go to him, but he needed space.
Tomorrow, I would finish this for him. I would end the woman’s life and take pleasure in delivering her pain as she had. I had no doubt she’d been the one who had inflicted the agony on West. He was in and out of sleep on the drive to the house, and his mumbled words had begged his mother to stop.
Sitting up, I rubbed at my chest as the fury lit inside me. Waiting was not a strength I had. I had a need to wrap my hands around her neck and wait as the life bled out of her.
There were only a few lives I had taken, and all meant something. All had been to save another.
With a sigh, I flicked back the blankets and put my feet to the floor. I wished I could sleep. However, my mind refused to shut down enough for me to do so. Instead, I stood and pulled on my pants. I zipped the fly but did not bother with the button. After walking to the door, I opened it and stepped out, closing it behind me. I could not lie in that bed any longer. I had to do something, and I was sure Lucas had said there was a gym in his large house somewhere.
I took a couple of steps, then paused. A sound from inside West’s room had me pressing my ear against the door. He whimpered.
Would he want me to check on him?
Would he want me to ease him from his nightmare?
A shuffle from down the hall had me looking that way. Lucas stood with Wreck at his back.
“I thought he would have nightmares.”
“Da, it sounds as if it has started.”
Lucas nodded, frowning, while Wreck just glared. “Are you going in?”
Wreck gazed down at his partner but said nothing.
A scream ripped through the house.
“Da,” I called and opened the door before me. I walked to the bed and sat on the edge at West’s hip, resting my hand on his shoulder. “Shhh, moya lyubov’. You are not there. You are home. With your friend Lucas. Shh. Nothing will hurt you here.” I hummed a tune my mama used to sing when I was a little boy while I ran my hand over the top of his shoulders, neck, and hair. He settled, his breathing evening out. “Good, moya lyubov’. That is it, breathe easy. You are not there, but here with me.” I continued humming.
After a while, West whispered, “What’s that song?”
I stilled for a second but then resumed tracing my fingers over him. “It is a song my mama used to sing to me when I was little and had nightmares.”
“It sounds pretty.”
“It is, and she has a beautiful voice.”
“I wish I had someone like that for a mother.”
I paused a moment. “Sorry, moya lyubov’. I wish you did also.”
“Tell me more about your childhood.”
“I am not sure it is a good idea.”
“Please. I know mine was shit. They were strict, and as punishment, I had to read from the bible in the basement without supper. It was why, when I got the scholarship, I got out of there. I got away from them. I knew my upbringing was a lot different to others, but I still like to hear about normal families.”
I snorted. “I would not call my family normal.”
“How?” he asked, and the more I was around him, the more I found it hard to say no.
“I said my family is mafia. I was brought up knowing this. When kids my age had sleepovers, I had defense lessons. Older, when kids were going out drinking, I was learning to kill a man with my bare hands. But I never went without. I always knew my parents would do anything for me, and they loved me.”
“Are you an only child?”
“Nyet. I have two older brothers, which was why it was easier for my father to let go. If I had been only child, I would have obligation to run business.” I knew I missed words to speak better English, but I was tired. “They want it more. I never did.”
“I’m glad you got to do what you want, Adrik.”
“Thank you, moya lyubov’.”
“Are you going to tell me what that means?”
“Nyet,” I teased with a small chuckle. “Are you ready to sleep again?”
He tensed.
“West?”
Shifting, I glanced down at his face. He had his eyes screwed shut, but I still caught the tears that escaped. Fear had taken hold. He worried about sleeping and the nightmares that came with it.
“My brothers are dickheads,” I announced. Before I pulled back and resumed my movements with my hand, I caught him relaxing somewhat.
He cleared his throat. “How?”
“Being the youngest, they always picked on me. But eventually, they stopped when I beat both of them in a fight. They still have moments, of course.”
His laugh was light, but it cut off with a wince. “Of course,” he said softly.
“My parents are in town at the moment.”
“Lucas said.”
“I am unsure how long they will stay.”
“It must be good to have them here.” He blinked tiredly.
“Da, it is.”
“Do you need to go and spend time with them?”
“Nyet, they know I will be here.”
“You don’t have to—”
“Hush, moya lyubov’. Maybe when you are feeling better, you could meet them.”
He swallowed thickly. “Maybe.”
He needs someone better. I’m not for him. I’m weak, dirty.
His words rushed through my mind again. He would not want to meet them until he realized he was my someone. Until he saw he was not weak or dirty.
“Um… what about work?”
“I have many men who take care of things.” I am where I need to be, I wanted to add but did not. He was not ready for my honesty. “I started reading those books.”
“Yeah? What do you think?” He yawned, and I knew I would have to leave soon, even when I did not want to.
“You were right. They do get better with each one.”
He smiled. I loved seeing it, loved that I put it there.
“Told you,” he mumbled.
“Da, you did.” I spoke about the characters, the storyline, and where I thought it would go. I talked and talked until I noticed his breathing had evened out. “Sweet dreams now, moya lyubov’,” I whispered, and bent close to press my lips gently to his temple.
Only when I stood, West jerked and gasped, “Adrik.”
I sat back down. “Da?”
“Nothing, sorry.”
“I thought you had fallen asleep?” I questioned.
“I had… but I felt the bed move. Sorry, it’s nothing. Goodnight.”
“West, may I rest on the chair beside your bed?”
“No! Please don’t feel you have to—”
“Hush.” I pressed a finger to his lips.
They moved under my finger when he said, “I don’t want to be a burden. You’ve already done enough.”
“Moya lyubov’. You will never be a burden. Trust me. I would like to stay.”
A blush hit his cheeks. He was always cute. “Then, in that case, take the other side of the bed. I… um, don’t move much.”
My gut twisted in the best way. “Thank you. I would like that.” It could help me sleep also, being close to him. I stood again and moved around the bed. West turned his head my way. With a wave of my hand, I gestured to my pants. “Do you mind?”
The blush was back.
“No,” he blurted quickly. He closed his eyes, and I removed my pants, slipping under the sheet. He opened his eyes as I lay down on my side, facing him.
“Do you need anything? I should have asked already.”
“No.” He smiled. “Lucas has me on the good stuff.”
Reaching out, I pushed his hair from his eyes. “Goodnight, West.”
“Night, Adrik.” He closed his eyes and relaxed into the bed. I did the same, and as I suspected, it did not take me long to find slumber being beside moya lyubov’.
“Hold her,” I ordered Wreck, of all people, and as he did, I gripped her jaw, prying it open. “You will feel everything you inflicted upon your son.” I smiled down at her tear-streaked face as she tried to wiggle free, whimpering. Wreck’s hold on her was steady, though. I rested the tip of the vinegar-filled jug to her lips. “You deserve everything you get.”
She choked and coughed through the amount I forced into her. Once done, I stepped back, and Wreck released his hold. She slapped her hands to the floor, heaving as she vomited it up. I knew her throat would be burning; it brought a small smile to my lips.
She needed to suffer.
“Can you do the rest?” Wreck asked from over the other side of her.
Lifting my hard gaze, I told him, “Of course I can.”
“Even when she’s a woman?”
“Gender does not interfere when it comes to revenge. Not when she tortured her own son for being gay.”
The bitch spat to the side. “It wasn’t only that,” she rasped.
“What?” I demanded.
Wreck kicked her in the back when she didn't answer, causing her to cry out. “Answer him.”
“He whored himself out,” she said.
Wreck chuckled. “You stupid bitch. He got paid to go on dates, and that was all he ever did. He never sold his body.”
I had guessed as much, but it was good to know for certain nothing had happened with West’s other clients. However, I still disliked the thought of West around other men. It would be something I had to work on if he continued working.
“It doesn’t matter. He sinned.”
I ground my teeth together and sneered down at the vile creature. Turning, I picked up the long, sharp knife and faced her. “Tie her hands down.”
Wreck grabbed the chain connected to the wall and dragged it over to her. She backed away from him.
“No, stop, please. Don’t do this.”
I’d known it would not take long for the begging to start.
“Did your son plead for you to stop?” I asked, tapping the blade onto my other hand.
She sobbed and nodded.
Wreck used the chains around her wrist to pull her forward where she lay on her stomach. “Then,” I started, “do you think I will listen when you did not with West?”
“Please, please,” she cried over and over.
“Hold her legs down.”
Wreck nodded and moved around as I planted a foot on each side of her hips. She started praying. I laughed. “May the Lord condemn your soul to hell for what you have done.” Leaning over, I sliced up through her top, and I did not stop there. The blade easily cut through the skin of her back, which welled with blood. She screamed and thrashed until I pressed my hand down onto the back of her neck. She still cried, but her movement stilled except for her hands as she hit them into the concrete floor while I sliced more and more of her skin.
Satisfaction swelled inside me, knowing she suffered the same way West had.
I had left him in the early hours to fulfill the revenge that burned inside me. I would go back to him knowing the last of the people who harmed him was dead.
I would make sure no other put a hand on him.
He would live the rest of his life happy and free from any harm.
And possibly, if I had anything to do with it, by my side.
Standing, I flung the knife to the floor. I stepped over her and made my way to the burning pit the Diamond MC men brought in for this situation. I picked up the searing metal rod and walked back over to the whimpering woman on the floor.
Ignoring her wide eyes, her imploring, I pressed the cross into her back. I winced as her skin sizzled and burned. It was not because of what I did. No, instead, it was the thought of West’s agony when they had done this to him.
I clenched my jaw and held it longer, forcing it deeper into her flesh.
She had done this. She had hurt West. For that, she would get more than what she gave him.
Straightening, I pulled the cross from her back. Her skin stuck to it.
“Are you done?” Wreck asked.
I shifted my gaze to his. “She will feel more?”
He nodded. “She will. They won’t hold back.”
“I am done,” I told him and made my way to the door. It had been a deal I struck with the Diamond MC. I got to deliver everything back to her exactly as she’d done to West, and in return, once I was done, they got to have their own fill of revenge.
Opening the door, Kylo, Saint, Country, and Death stepped through. They greeted me with a lift of their chin, but it was Kylo who patted me on the shoulder as he passed.
I heard a clap as I stepped through the doorway, and then someone said, “Wake her up and let’s get this started.”