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As we approached the shore, which I was able to recognize when we became close; it was Ayia Napa. In another world, I might have wanted to become a seaman; I would have done well I think. The whole shore was sleepy, and some lights were on, and others were off in the many hotels occupying the entire shore; it was not the season yet, but some people came here anyway preferring to be winter tourists.
I chose a spot at the far end of a hotel as I could see it had direct access to the road so we would not have to go inside the hotel to get back out on the streets. Pam and I agreed to speak only English and to say we were from Spain hoping we wouldn't come across any Spanish tourists who would love to speak Spanish to us. I brought the boat onto the shore, took our bag and made sure we left nothing behind. I turned the boat around towards the open sea, fixed the steering wheel to keep steering forward and jammed the accelerator, so the boat went flying back into the sea. I didn't care what would happen to it. I wanted to see it going away from the shore. I looked around, and I didn't think anybody was watching. We walked the little stretch of the beach, and we were on the road.
We waited at the bus stop for about half an hour for the first bus to arrive; we got on the bus and were on our way to Larnaca, not on purpose, but because the bus happened to be going there.
In Larnaca, I exchanged all our money into euros. We got seventy-three hundred euros, which was a good start, but we both knew it could not last forever in Cyprus.
We could not stay in hotels because we didn't have passports or any safe-to-use IDs, but Pam told me she came to Cyprus once with her friends and they rented a place in the countryside close to Larnaca, which was much cheaper and required no form of identification.
"The place belonged to an old couple. They rented out two separate rooms in their house to tourists, but I don't think it was legal, so they did not insist on any identification. We may try going there and finding this place or another place like it in the country." Pam said.
"We need a place to rest and think about what we want to do next."
We couldn't find the place Pam was talking about, but we asked a man, and he told us about a village in the Larnacan district called Alethriko. He said we could find places like that there. Altheriko was a small village close to the city center of Larnaca, a perfect place for us.
The man was right as we found a family of an old couple with their old daughter living with them in the main house and there was a small cottage at the far end of their land, which they agreed to rent out to us for two hundred euros a week.
The cottage was not big, but so cozy with the little fireplace at one end and the old display shelves at the other end. There was a small bedroom with two single beds, a small kitchenette, and a bathroom. My nose never welcomed the humidity choking in before, but in this hut, it was comforting to know it was not used as much by many people, and judging by what we saw in the village, we were sure it was not in any way a tourist attraction in Cyprus.
We both slept the whole day; I didn't think sailing would be so exhausting, but I guess being nervous sailing was what made it so. We woke up in the afternoon and decided that we deserved a night out to celebrate our staying alive.
We went out back to Larnaca not thinking of what the next day would bring to us or if we had any plans at all. No more plans as our heads ached from the constant scheming we had to come up with for the past three weeks. We were on a date. We were like teenagers tasting life out of the boundaries of their parents' homes for the first time alone. We ate and danced and drank. We walked on the beach watching the few stars daring to show up on that chilly winter night. I could see the smile widening on Pam's eyes and in her eyes, I could see mine widening, too. I laughed and enjoyed every second as if I had no good time in my life before. For a moment, I felt like a true hero and the princess I saved was right there in front of me and we could get to live happily ever after. It felt as if we were two characters in a fairy tale.
We got back to the cottage after midnight. We were dancing and singing. Everything in the room was flying with us, too. We were like two little kids thrilled to find out there was somebody their age out there in the world. In a few moments, these two kids grew to become teenagers who fell for each other and saw the entire world leading to one path towards each other, and now a man and a woman alone in a room with the fireplace warming them up, but the real heat was coming from beneath the skin shining in the firelight. A man and a woman who kissed caressed and loved all night and figured there was no need for the two beds in the little room anymore, so they joined them as one.
The next day, I woke up feeling the tiny sliver of light coming in from the window tingling my skin as if sun rays had never touched my bare skin and penetrated my bones to warm the marrow. The sounds came from outside my door were unbelievable to my ears for I didn't know I could hear the music of the little shoots of grass dancing to the morning breeze; stories told and retold; I never got bored trying to understand what the birds were saying to each other, and for some stories, I'd smile and laugh in my heart for I realized what it meant to want to fly up with your beloved in a sky away from the bullets of the hunters. Nothing could pin down my will to live, to feel every breath coming in like it was the last sip of air in the world not waiting for the next, I couldn't wait for the next one to come but I didn't wait for I knew good things never last, and all I could do was enjoy the oxygen filling my lungs and I held it within as long as I could to keep the moment alive and hope there would be much more, but what if life ended, and no more breathing could take place anymore; I had enough of life, and anything more was a bonus. I rejoiced every ticking of the clock, and for once without pretending to know all the secrets of the universe, I asked what time was, away from the physics of Hawkins and Einstein, time froze. Time could pass as much as it liked, but I captured this moment in memory, engraved in my soul forever.
I never pictured myself bearing so much emotion, but to feel the highlight of your life lie in the exhales and inhales of a sleeping person lying next to you and you cannot keep your eyes away from the mundane and the most unappreciated actions we humans take, her mere breathing was taking my breath away. Then she opened her eyes to see me on her side not with looks of disbelief, I hoped she had half the feelings I had inside. They were enough to love a person a thousand lifetimes right there, right at that moment we froze for a week or two or more I could not remember as we lost track of time. I never knew who I was anymore. Maybe, I was a prince taken from an old tale most people doubted it ever happened. Only Pam and I knew of this secret world not built in the walls around or the trees or the sound of birds, but in the walls of the humankind that both melted down and all left to stand was her being a woman and I being a man. It was as real as the truth, but just like a dream, I was so afraid it might end, and I could wake up to find none of it happened even if it took back years and months when my life was just happening.
"I'm not Susan." Pam moved to the side of the bed, she sat there covering herself with a blanket, and she lit a cigarette.
"What?" I realized that I called her Susan, but I pretended I didn't know what she was talking about.
"I'm not Susan, George. I'm not her."
"Listen. I'm sorry. I never felt I was with anybody else. It's just..."
"I know. You don't have to explain. Just let me be."
I didn't know what to say other than I was sorry, but I knew there was nothing I could do right then to make it up. I had to let her be as she said. I put on my clothes and went out to walk. It was midday and not too chilly to enjoy a walk under the trees and the few birds that withstood the power of winter holding on for spring just like Pam and me, but the long winter for us was far from gone. I smoked a cigarette or two and came back inside. Pam was all dressed up as if ready to go somewhere.
"Where are you going?"
"We need to find a job or something. We've been dreaming, George. How long do you think the money we have will last? Did you ask yourself this question or were you just enjoying your time in the past two weeks?"
"I never even thought of taking advantage of you, if that's what you're saying. I would never do that to you. I'm sorry I mentioned Susan by mistake. Yeah, I'm not going to lie to you, I think of her, too. I keep thinking of how she's handling it all while I'm gone."
"Well, at least you're handling it pretty well."
"Pam, stop, please. I'm sorry, OK."
I couldn't assume I understood how she felt, but I was a man, and I didn't think I would like to be called a John or a Carl, so I knew I hurt her, and she was right.
"Listen, you're right. We cannot stay like that forever. The money will run out someday, so I'll go find a job in a place where they wouldn't ask me for any papers or anything. Let me do it, and please stay here. Don't go out until I come back." I hoped she'd look at me and show me a smile or anything to ease the burden of guilt I was carrying, but she didn't even bother to turn her head and look at me while I was taking slow steps towards the door and out of the cottage.
I walked all the way to Larnaca, which was not very far. I walked for almost two hours hoping to see small private-looking construction sites or other small businesses where I could ask if they had any openings. I wouldn't dare go to significant places for they would ask me for some identification. If I only spoke Greek, everything could have been different. I could pretend to be a Cypriot. I wasn't the student-looking type to work at some restaurant, either.
I focused on some souvenir shops downtown. I wasn't sure if they needed a Spanish English-speaking guy like I said I was, and what if they hired me for the Spanish part of my story? Pam thought we could sell our story better if we were Spaniards because we looked like them, according to her.
Everybody spoke English in Cyprus, so it was not a point of strength in my so-called resume, and I couldn't use my real points of strength because that would only be good for big companies I was steering away from.
I had no luck the first day, and when I came back to the cottage, Pam was asleep, or so she wanted me to believe. She even stayed in bed the next morning until I left. I started my search in the early morning, and I hoped I could come back that day with some good news. It would be an excuse to wake her up and talk to her.
I must admit my CV was not exactly hot, and neither was the tourism season. Maybe things would have been easier in the summer, but I couldn't wait until summer. In the afternoon, I was walking searching for some quarters or alleys I might not have covered in my extensive search through the city which was not too big to cover, anyway. I looked at a small street trying to remember if I tried it or not before. I felt it was fresh-looking to my eyes, so I entered. There weren't a lot of shops in it, but there was a souvenir shop near the middle of the street next to a snack bar and a grocery store. The sign was in Greek letters, not like other shops which had both Greek and English, so I didn't think I had much hope in this place, but there was nothing to it. I admit the first couple of shops were difficult as it felt like begging; the whole idea was hard to swallow, but after asking in over twenty shops, it was like a message in an answering machine for me to ask if they needed a Spanish English-speaking person to help them in the shop.
The lady who owned the shop looked a little over sixty I thought, but she was well-dressed and had her makeup done a little too much for a shop in the middle of nowhere during the off-season souvenir business. She was smiling at me; she must have taken me for a stupid customer to miss all the bigger and more colorful shops on the main street and kind of lose his way to find himself in her shop.
I was going to say my cliché and move out of the shop as fast as I came in, but I couldn't believe the word I heard. She said yes. Did she say yes? I turned around and found her still smiling at me, and I asked her to say it again, and she did. It was a yes. I couldn't say a word for a few seconds before I thanked her and asked about the details of the job which were not bad. She wanted me to come from ten to five and said she would give me three hundred euros a week. There I had the rent covered; I thought it was a good start. It was a Saturday, so I told her I could start on Monday. She didn't explain much about what I was supposed to do, but I didn't ask either. All I wanted was to hurry back and break the happy news to Pam.