Chapter Nine

Lucinda

“How many more dresses are you going to try on?” Nadia whined.

“Just this last one,” I said, modeling another dress. “What about this one?”

“I like it,” Nadia said plainly.

“You’ve said you liked all five of them. I need a decision. Mom, please help me here. This date is important to me.” I threw my hands up.

My nerves were a wreck as I prepared for my first date with Aldris. For the past few weeks, he’d been a constant factor in my life as he helped me prepare for my new job opportunity. No lie, Aldris had been absolutely amazing the last few weeks. He’d been more than amazing. He’d been a godsend.

Everything was just as he’d stated when I called Suzette, and I interviewed the next day. After the interview, she hired me on the spot and at $18.50 per hour just as Aldris had said. First things first, after securing the new bag, he went shopping with me to ensure I had all the proper equipment needed to work from home. He helped me pick out the perfect PC in my price range, a Dell Inspiron with a twenty-inch flat-screen monitor, and he even sprang for an ergonomic keyboard for me. Of course, I didn’t want to accept it, but he insisted. Afterward, he came to my apartment and hooked the computer up for me and made sure the medical software was installed correctly. What I loved most was that I never asked him to do any of it. He just did it. This dude was truly a man, and I liked that about him above all else.

The work hours totally worked out, because my classes were from 8:00 to 10:00 a.m., so I was able to drop Nadia off at school in the mornings, go to class, and then come home to cook and do my homework before I had to pick her up at three. Once she was home, I helped her with her homework and fed her, and then she read her books, watched TV, or played with her dolls until I could take a break to bathe her and send her to bed. After that, I worked usually until about one in the morning. Thankfully, Ms. Ana helped me out on Saturday mornings by picking up Nadia so that I could get some rest.

After only two weeks on the job, I already had the game on lock. Once I found my groove and set my routine, I was able to finish my designated paperwork, do a little extra work, and still rest before it was time to clock out. Suzette and the doctors could only sing praises about me. I was doing—as they could say—the damn thang!

What I was most excited about was that pay. I had to wait a paycheck in the hole, but ooh wee! My first paycheck was $1,480 for two weeks, and even after Uncle Sam and benefits, I still cleared $1,140. The doctors even decided to award me with a sign-on bonus of $500 because their claims processing had improved 3 percent just in the two weeks I’d worked for them. It felt good to pay all my bills and still have a whole paycheck left. Not only that, I still had $1,500 left in my account between my stripping money and my unemployment checks. Hell, I wasn’t Donald Trump rich, but a chica was sitting pretty and looking lovely. For the first time, in forever, I could breathe. Ahhh, didn’t that feel good? Yep! And that’s all I ever wanted.

Now back to the next best thing—Aldris. We talked on the phone all the time. We were constantly making each other laugh, and he’d met Nadia, who thought he was “sooo” cute. He was such a gentleman, even postponing our date to give me time to settle into my new job and routine. I was in such awe of his patience that when he asked me if I would be free this Saturday night to go out to dinner and then to see the play A Raisin in the Sun, I easily accepted. Now my only issue was my attire.

“Well, Mami, I said I like all five because I think you’re pretty in all five,” Nadia said to me.

“Aww, sweetie, thank you,” I said, kissing her on the forehead.

“She’s right, you know. You are smoking hot in all of them,” my mom agreed. “But if you must have a decision, I’d go with the classic black dress. The halter style accentuates your soft shoulders and your cleavage. It also accentuates your waistline, and the ankle length makes you look regal. And those silver stilettos are to die for!”

My eyebrows jogged, and I pointed my index finger in agreement. “You’re right. And I don’t know what color he’s wearing, so I don’t want to be mismatched or loud.”

“Do you want me to pin your hair up for you?” my mom asked.

“Yes, would you please?”

“Of course.”

Since my mother was going to assist with my hair, I hurriedly bounded to the shower. Once I was out, I moisturized my body, put on my undergarments, then tossed on a button-down shirt so that she could begin on my hair.

“You really like this Aldris fellow, huh?” my mom asked as she brushed my hair.

Releasing a deep breath, I hoped to mask my inner feelings. “He’s nice.”

My mother paused, and her lips curled at the corners. “You’re going through all this trouble for someone you think is just nice?” She eyed me, unconvinced, in the mirror.

When I blushed, she poked my cheek. “Stop, Mama!”

She laughed. “That’s the look I want to see! You like him, Lucinda. There’s nothing wrong with that. You made a mistake with Raul, but that doesn’t mean you can’t find someone.”

No offense, but this advice from her was shocking to me. Of all people, my mother should have been the first one to denounce love. “How can you say that when your marriage ended in shambles?”

“I haven’t given up hope that the man for me is still out there. What your father did discouraged me, of course. I thought Emilio and I would be together forever, but look at your abuelo and abuela. My parents have been together for fifty years. That is proof positive that real love, everlasting love, exists.”

She finished pinning my hair, and I turned around. She lifted my chin up so that I was looking in her eyes. “If Mr. Aldris is worth it, then don’t let Raul or your father hold you back. Step out on faith that God will show you if Aldris is the man for you,” she schooled me as I fanned tears out of my eyes. “You look beautiful.”

I hugged her. “Thank you. I love you, Mami.”

“Oh, hija, I love you too.”

My mom left my room so that I could put on my makeup and clothes. I thought about what she’d said and realized that she was right, but so much weighed on me. Our different upbringings, the whole strip club thing, and to top it off, LaMeka’s whole confession about the possibility of being HIV positive had me on edge. I had to make sure that Aldris wasn’t on some bullshit, because my girl was proof that shit was real. However, I promised myself that I wouldn’t ruin this night.

As I finished dressing, I heard my mom open the door for Aldris. He introduced himself to my mom, or rather Nadia introduced him, and all three of them were chatting it up like they were old friends.

“Ay, Lucinda! The man is going to fall asleep out here,” my mom yelled.

Laughing, he said, “It’s okay, Ms. Rosa. I was a little early.”

“She’s just ragging on me,” I said, making my grand entrance.

Aldris’s eyes nearly popped out of his head, and his mouth hung agape. “Oh my God,” he said as he stood up. “You look . . . I mean, you are . . . My God,” he said, looking mesmerized.

“I look that bad?” I giggled.

“No, you look that stunningly amazing,” he said with a kiss on my cheek.

My mom laughed. “Oh, I like him.”

“Me too, Abuela,” Nadia giggled before facing Aldris. “Mr. Aldris, I’m glad you like it, because my mami spent all day trying on dresses, and she got so mad because we couldn’t decide which—” My mom closed Nadia’s mouth with her hand.

“Sweetheart, we don’t tell our menfolk all of our secrets,” my mom whispered as Aldris and I laughed.

“Thank you, Mama.”

Aldris turned to face me again. “It’s nice to know that you put so much effort and care into tonight. More importantly, it shows.”

This man and his words! My face reddened as I bent my head, slightly embarrassed of my schoolgirl response. Fanning myself, I gathered myself and offered him a compliment as well. “Thank you. I’m so rude. You look very handsome.” He was very debonair in his designer suit.

“Thank you.” He winked at me, and I felt my cheeks flush yet again. “I hope I still look twenty-eight in it.”

I laughed, grateful for the comic relief. “Yes, you do!”

“We better be getting out of here,” my mom said, picking up Nadia’s suitcase for her weekend stay.

“Allow me, Ms. Rosa.” Aldris reached for the suitcase, but my mom fanned him away.

“No, no, I have it, but I like that,” she said, looking over her shoulder at me. “I really like him. Yes, I do,” she said with a grin on her face on her way to the door. I couldn’t do anything but snicker and shake my head.

“See you on Sunday, Mami,” Nadia said as we hugged tightly.

“I love you, kiddo.”

“Back at you, Mom,” she said playfully. She was so amusing.

My mom hugged me and Aldris, then Nadia and Aldris exchanged a handshake he’d taught her, before we all left.

Dinner was simply amazing. Not wanting to embarrass him, I made sure to learn even the small things, such as using proper table etiquette so I knew my salad fork from my dinner fork. We looked great together, and our conversation was refreshing and light. Unaccustomed to this lifestyle, I sat there in childlike wonderment. Aldris glanced over at me and just smiled. He had to know he’d introduced this chica to some of the finer things in life.

The play was so inspirational. During intermissions, I splurged on a glass of wine more than anything to relax my nerves. That wine was so sweet and smooth that I wanted to toss that shit back, but remembering to be classy, I sipped it. Granted, they were some big sips, but I sipped to showcase my best behavior.

Being a true gentleman, as he’d been throughout the night, Aldris opened my car door for me, and I climbed into his black pearl BMW 750i to leave the play.

“Did you have a good time?” he asked as we got on the road.

A shy smile graced my face as I turned my head toward him. “I did! The food was awesome, and the play was fantastic. Thank you for taking me. You have been quite the gentleman and a wonderful date.”

A hearty baritone chuckle escaped him as he flashed his award-winning smile toward me. “Good, good. I’m glad. You’ve been an amazing date as well. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed myself with you, Lucinda.”

There was a slight pause after his compliment, which created a slightly awkward silence. Perhaps it was my nerves kicking in, because I could feel the butterflies fluttering in the pit of my stomach again. Deflecting, I looked at my watch and saw it was 11:30. “I guess we’re calling it a night, huh?” I asked nervously. I didn’t want to, but I didn’t know what else he had planned, and I didn’t want to assume anything.

Gripping the steering wheel with his left hand, his right fell to the console gingerly as he flicked his wrist. “We don’t have to unless you want to.” He looked over at me as if silently pleading with me to say no.

Calm down, nerves, I coaxed in my mind as I nodded. “Sure, I can hang out. I’m used to the vampire hours.”

“What would you like to do?” His smile beamed brightly even under the darkness of the night.

I figured that I’d play it safe and go someplace quiet but not romantic, so we went to this park that I used to go to when I was a kid. He didn’t protest at all. He simply asked me to plug in the directions to his car’s GPS system. I was grateful that he hadn’t thought the idea was lame and attempt to change the plans. My aim was to talk and keep the evening nice and light rather than find myself back at his place or him at mine. That dynamic was far too enticing, and I didn’t trust myself with that type of alone time with Aldris.

Once there, we exited his vehicle, and then he pulled off his suit jacket, placed it on the trunk of his car, and sat down. I stood off to the side, eyeing him as he took his seat on his car.

“Come here,” he said to me, motioning with his index finger.

Slowly, I walked over to him, taking him in with each step. His muscles bulged through his dress shirt as he sat there waiting for me to come close to him. Damn, he was so fucking fine.

“What’s up?” I asked, trying to seem nonchalant to mask the nervousness coursing through my body.

Gently, he grabbed my hands and then pulled me close to him. “You are,” he said, giving me those damn eyes. Those eyes had definitely changed from puppy-dog eyes to bedroom eyes. Those eyes were trouble.

“Me?” I pointed to myself and dropped my head, avoiding his sexy gaze.

“You know you are,” he said, holding me close and tight. His cologne infiltrated my nostrils, and I swore I damn near creamed myself as he cocooned me in his arms. Ay Dios mio! This man! Using one hand, he lifted my chin to capture my gaze again. “Lucinda, since we’ve been around each other these past few weeks, I’ve loved being with you. At this point, I hope it’s obvious to you that I’m really feeling you a lot. But if not, I want to let you know that I like you—”

Suddenly, I was fearful of what he was about to tell me, so I spun around with my back to him and pointed to the sky. “Aren’t the stars beautiful?” I interrupted.

Not bothering to respond to my question, he released a small sigh, then turned me back around to face him again. “The only star I’m focused on is you. Why are you running from me?”

“Huh?” I asked, biting my lip. It was a nervous habit.

Cupping my face, Aldris licked his lips sexily, and his gaze was intentional. “You don’t have to run from me. I’m not Raul.”

Truth be told, he’d hit one of my major concerns right on the head. Having to go through the bullshit with Raul scorned me and kept me from feeling comfortable enough to pursue another relationship. But when it came to Aldris, that was a secondary concern. “It’s not just that,” I admitted.

“What else is there? Why else are you afraid of the possibility of us? Let’s get it all out there so there is no question left unanswered.”

He was right. As great as this moment felt, I needed to know Aldris’s true intentions with me. Even though I trusted that he was a good guy, a part of me still had my reservations, especially after Club Moet. I pulled away from him and placed my hands on my hips. “Okay. Why me?”

He shrugged as if he were confused as to why I’d asked. “Because I’m attracted to you, and I like you.” He smiled demurely and bit his lip. “You make me laugh. We have great conversations. We are interested in the same things professionally—”

“You saw my ass in your face at Club Moet,” I added as I turned and walked a few steps away.

I could hear that he’d climbed down off the car, and the next thing I knew, he stood in front of me. “I’ve never brought that up to you. Not even once. That’s not fair to me, Lucinda.”

Now my attitude was slightly on go. Club Moet was the biggest elephant in the room. We both knew that. I couldn’t believe that he was really going to stand here and act like seeing my tits and ass on full display had no bearing on his sudden interest in me. I didn’t believe that shit for one minute. “But it’s the truth. Please just admit it, Aldris. Please. The only reason you’re wining and dining me is because you want to see a little Spanish Fly.”

He shook his head, obviously irritated. He swiped his hand down his face before he lifted his wallet out of his back pocket. “You want me to treat you like Spanish Fly?” He pulled a $50 bill from his wallet. “Go ahead. Shake that ass. Rake it up.” He tossed the bill, and it floated between us to the ground.

Did this nigga just toss some fucking money at me? My mouth dropped open. “Hell no. Are you crazy? I can’t believe you said and did that!” I was completely pissed off.

“No, I didn’t. You did,” he said angrily. “I’m over here on my real-man shit. I’m trying to get to know Lucinda, but you seem to be stuck on introducing me to Spanish Fly, so go ahead and let me see her so we can get this shit over with. Maybe then I can finally get back to getting to know Lucinda.”

Stun took over my body at the realization that he was serious about truly wanting to know me. All this time, I believed his interest had been sparked by Spanish Fly when he was honestly interested in me. Me. Lucinda. That thought alone scared me even more than feeling as though he wanted a little of the Spanish Fly. Releasing a deep groan, I shook my head. “I’m sorry. No dude—I mean, man—has ever been like you. Aldris, I don’t know how to handle this. You’re so nice and respectful. I’m not the woman for you. I’m not your type.”

He glanced at me sideways. Anger danced in his eyes. “And how the hell do you know what my type is?”

To prove my point, I counted on my fingers the reasons why I was not a good fit for him. “You come from a good home. You’ve experienced things in life. You’re intelligent and educated. You need to be with someone of your . . . your caliber. I’m not that chick . . . I mean, woman. I come from a broken home with uneducated parents. I’m just trying to get my life together, and I already have a ready-made family. We’re different, Aldris. I’m not who you need in your life!”

With his jaw clenched, he remained quiet as he placed his hands in his pockets and paced back and forth. After a few moments, he turned to face me and shrugged his shoulders. “That’s it? You’re going to pass judgment on me and kick me to the curb without even knowing or trying to understand how I feel about you?”

Frustrated beyond belief, I tried to further explain. “I just don’t want you to waste your time. You—”

He picked up his jacket and put it on. “Get in the car, Lucinda,” he said sternly.

“Huh?” The harshness of his tone stopping further protests.

“Get in the car. I’m taking you home.”

His words were searing now. He was so upset that I could almost feel the heat radiating off of him. To prevent a major blowup between us, I said nothing further and instead walked to the passenger side of his car. I waited for him to open the door, but instead of opening my door as he’d done every time we were together, he walked to his side, got in, and slammed the door. Realizing that I’d truly pissed him off, I hit myself on the forehead before slowly easing inside of the car. I hadn’t meant to anger him. I simply wanted to save him from my drama. I thought I was looking out for him. Once I nestled inside and buckled up, I glanced over at him, but he didn’t even look in my direction, and I didn’t know what to say. Obviously, everything I’d already said had been wrong, so I just shut the hell up. I thought he needed a moment to collect himself, but Aldris wouldn’t even look at or speak to me for the entire ride back to my house.

Once he parked beside my car, I turned to face him, but he still kept his face forward. Regardless, I spoke to him. I didn’t want him to think that I was unappreciative of everything he’d done from the job recommendation through our date tonight. I was extremely grateful for him and all he’d done. I just felt that I wasn’t the woman for him. He was a perfect ten, and he needed a ten. Hell, he deserved a woman who was a hundred. And that wasn’t me. Even if I wanted to be, I wasn’t. I couldn’t drag him down with me.

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I spoke softly. “Aldris, I had a great time. I’m sorry it ended on a bad note. I hope that we can still be friends.”

For the first time since the park, he turned and looked at me as if I were crazy. “Friends?” he asked in disbelief.

Ay Dios mio. I’d said the wrong thing again. “I better go,” I said, opening the door and turning to get out.

“For the record, Lucinda, I liked you before I even saw you at the club. I just wasn’t allowed to fraternize with my employees. I’ve been attracted to you since the first day you walked into National Cross, and I always felt like there was something special about you,” he admitted while my back was turned.

What? His words were like daggers to my back. I didn’t realize that he’d liked me all along. This revelation stung me to the core. How could I have misjudged him so badly? Instantly, I felt horrible. I still didn’t feel on his level, but those words provided a change in my heart. Shit. I should’ve shut my mouth and heard him out. The urge to apologize and the need to discuss things immediately tugged at my heart. I turned to face him. “Aldris—”

Before I could say another word, he glared at me. “Good night, Lucinda,” he said with finality.

The finality in his words indicated that he was done. Done with the argument. Done with the conversation. And done with me. There was nothing that I could say, and my face went flush as hot tears threatened to fall. Out of respect for his hurt feelings, I didn’t attempt further conversation. I felt so awful as I exited the car and headed to my apartment. Aldris may have been pissed, but he did wait until I was in the house before he pulled off. Even in his anger, he was still a man. I had messed up bad. I knew it. I promised myself that I wouldn’t do that, but I did.

After I showered, I sat on my sofa, worrying about how things ended with Aldris. Over and over again, my mind replayed what he’d said: “I liked you before I even saw you at the club.” After about thirty minutes, I couldn’t take it. I wasn’t going to be able to lay my head down to rest until I cleared the air between us.

I called Aldris, but he didn’t answer. I even called again for good measure, but he still didn’t answer. Fuck that. Any normal person would chuck it up and count it as a loss. Hell, I would’ve done it. But something about the thought of Aldris being angry with me and, worse yet, never speaking to me again bothered me. I couldn’t allow things to end on that note. Even if he never wanted another thing to do with me, I wanted to talk, to give him the opportunity to talk, and to apologize for my actions. I had to find a way to make things right between us, even if there was never anything else between us. He’d been too good to me to end that way.

Without hesitation, I got up, slid on my flip-flops, and drove to his condo. I was happy that I had paid attention to the directions when we’d stopped there briefly after I got my computer. When I arrived, his car was in the parking space. Good. He was home. Quickly, I approached his apartment and knocked on his door.

“Who is it?” he asked.

“Aldris, it’s me. Lucinda. Please let me in.”

He partially opened the door and stood there in a fitted white tee that defined all of his muscles, some gray cotton sweatpants, and socks. “What do you want?” he snapped.

I looked at him with pleading eyes. “Please, can I come inside? Please.”

He bit his lip and shook his head before he opened the door. I came inside then turned to face him. “I called you. Twice,” I said softly.

“I got it. Twice,” he countered. “What is that you want with me?”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t give you the opportunity to express yourself. I just made a bunch of assumptions because of my insecurities, and for that, I owe you a huge apology. I am sorry.”

He huffed and rubbed his forehead. “How I feel didn’t start because I saw your ass in Club Moet. It didn’t start because I felt ill over you getting fired either. Like I said, I’ve liked you since the moment I laid eyes on you. I prayed to God that if you were the one, He’d make an opportunity for me to able to approach you, which is why I gave you my business card when they terminated you. I was hoping that you’d call, but you didn’t.

“When I saw you at the club, I was hurt because that wasn’t you and because my boys had seen you intimately. I started to give up on you, but when I saw you leave the club, it felt as if God Himself were telling me to follow you. I was happy I did, because it showed me that I was right and that girl in the club wasn’t you. It also led to blessings for you and made a way for us to become friends, and I knew then that this was what I’d prayed for. But I guess I was wrong. You are so hung up on the situation at the club, how I was raised, and the things I’ve done in my life to give us any type of chance.

“Then you further insult me by asking if we could remain friends. I’ve got news for you, Lucinda. I don’t date friends, and I damn sure don’t feel for them how I feel for you. I’m not trying to be your friend. I’m trying to be your man, and I wanted you to be my woman.”

Talk about floored. Aldris pulled the trigger and unloaded the clip on me. It left me leaking with a huge hole in my heart. Here, this amazingly amazing man poured out his innermost secrets to me about his feelings, and I questioned him. He’d done all of this because he sincerely wanted to be with me. I was wrong all along. I felt like an idiot. Scratch that. I was an idiot.

Easing up to him, I grabbed his hands. “I had no idea, and it wasn’t for me to know at the time. I should have trusted you, but please understand that it’s hard for me to do that. No man in my life, not even my father, has been trustworthy. I can’t judge you by that, but it makes it hard for me to trust because of that. I’m a rough chica, but I’m crazy about you. I was afraid of those feelings. I understand if you don’t want to deal with me anymore. I messed up, and I have to live with that. I just wanted to give you the opportunity that I didn’t before. Again, I’m sorry.” I let his hands go, and I turned to leave.

“You’re just going to walk out on me again?” he asked.

“But I thought—” I turned back toward him.

“You overthink sometimes.”

He pulled me close to him and kissed me. When he pulled back, I brought his ass right back for some more of that kiss. That shit was good, and I wanted more.

“Girl, you better stop,” he laughed, causing me to blush.

“I’m sorry,” I said, getting serious for a moment.

“Me too,” he said and pecked me on the lips. “You still leaving?”

“Not unless you kick me out.”

He laughed. “Good. You can stay. But we have to get something clear. I am a man, Lucinda, so you’re going to have to work on treating me as such. ’Cause I am damn sure going to treat you like a woman, not some chick or damn Spanish Fly.”

Damn. I’d never had a real man put me in my place before, and surprisingly, it turned me on! We’d only just begun, and he knew how to handle my ass. I threw my hands up in surrender. “You got it. But I have a question,” I said as we held each other and gazed into each other’s eyes.

“What’s that, baby?”

“I’m your baby now?”

“Yes, damn it, woman. You’re my baby. Didn’t we just straighten all that out? If not, allow me to make it clear for you. You are now in a relationship with Aldris Sharper. You are officially my baby, and I’m yours,” he laughed.

“Good.” I smiled. “But I do still have a question.”

“What is it?” he asked me.

I stood on my tiptoes and whispered in his ear. “Are you ready to get caught in the Spanish Fly trap?”

He burst out laughing and sat on the sofa. “As long as Spanish Fly only surfaces for me.”

I laughed. “Only for you, baby. But I thought you weren’t attracted to Spanish Fly,” I teased as I slowly began swaying my hips from side to side as I stood in front of him.

“Shit, bullshit,” he said, gazing at me with lust in his eyes as he rubbed his hands up and down my thighs. “I just didn’t want my boys to see it. I am a man. So please go ahead and introduce me again to the fly trap, because I have someone to introduce you to as well.”

“Who is that?” I giggled.

“Mandingo,” he chuckled. “The blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice, and you know what they say. Once you go black—”

“You don’t go back,” I hollered, straddling his lap and kissing him. “Thank you for bearing with me.”

He held the sides of my face in the palms of his hands. “Thank you for giving us a chance. I know it took a lot for you to come over here tonight, and I promise you, you will never regret it.” And with that, we shared another intimate kiss.

I didn’t know what I did to deserve a man like Aldris, but I wasn’t going to question it anymore. Thank God I had him. With every touch and kiss, I knew this is where I wanted to be. I also knew I wasn’t going to make it back to my place. As of tonight I was forgetting all of my fears and giving my all to Aldris . . . in more ways than one!