I try to take a minute every day to stop and count my blessings, because they are many and I am so very grateful. I watch the children as they tear into their Christmas presents, and then I see Seth sitting on the end of the sofa. He’s wearing red and green pajamas just like the little kids, and my heart squeezes because he works so hard to be a part of the family.
Seth left for college and it was a job getting him to go. I think some part of him felt like he needed to stay in the neighborhood for his sisters, and it took some time for Matt to convince him that he wants to be the girls’ father, and that Seth can be their brother. Their brother who isn’t responsible for their wellbeing all the time.
He finally left for college, and it has been easier with the girls since then, I hate to say. They still had a tendency to go to Seth for permission or for help, particularly when they weren’t getting their way. But since he has been gone, he’s starting to act a little more like a brother rather than a father.
I lean back against the couch beside his legs and he nudges my shoulder with his knee. “Merry Christmas, Aunt Sky,” he says. He doesn’t call me Mommy, not like his sisters do. But they have very few memories of their mother, and Seth remembers a lot. He was almost sixteen when she died, so he had her for a lot longer.
I lean my head on his knee. “Merry Christmas, Seth.” He pats the top of my head, awkwardly, because he’s still a teenager and he’s all elbows and knees. “What was it like when your mom was alive, Seth?” I ask quietly. “Was it noisy like this?” I motion toward all the commotion.
“No.” He smiles softly. “It was quiet. The girls were little, and Mom was sick, so we had a calm Christmas.” He sits quietly for a moment. “I wish she were here. She would love this.”
“You think so?”
He nods. “She always wanted a bigger family. Although I’m not sure anyone asks for a family quite this big.” He chuckles.
I reach into my pocket and pull out a gift I had made especially for him. I lay it in his lap. “This is for you.”
He flips it over in his hand. “Aunt Sky,” he says quietly. “Can I tell you something?”
I prop my chin on his knee and look up at him. “You can tell me anything,” I say.
“Sometimes, I’m afraid my mother will get her feelings hurt if I love you too much, you know?” he says. “So, I just wanted to tell you that even though I didn’t take your last name, and I didn’t get adopted like the girls did, I feel like you’re my mom and Matt’s my dad, and I love that you took that spot in my life. If I could pick anyone to be my mom in the whole wide world, it would be you.”
I tip my face into his pajama leg, because he’s just wrapped a fist around my heart and squeezed. When I can breathe, I lift my face. “I may not have given birth to you, Seth, but you have become my son. And I don’t think your mom would be jealous. I think she would be happy that you have people in your life that you can come to like you would natural-born parents.”
“My real dad is alive, Sky, and I haven’t seen him in two years. So I think it’s safe to assume that Matt’s as close to a dad as I’m ever going to get. He’s so much better than the real one.” He grins down at me. “Do you think you could get him to stop texting me to tell me to use a condom every time I go on a date, though?”
I shake my head. “Probably not.”
He laughs and tears at the paper on his package, almost like he’s afraid to open it. Then he pulls the tiny pendant on a simple gold chain from the box and lets it dangle in front of him. When you first look at it, you only see the words “Strong, brave, proud.” But when the light hits it, you can see an etched image in the gold that shows a picture of him with his mother.
“Wow, Aunt Sky, that’s beautiful.” He lets it shimmer in front of his face, taking in the facets of it. “Sometimes I forget what she looked like. What she sounded like. This is great. Thank you so much.”
He reaches behind his neck to clasp the chain, and then grabs the pendant in his fist. “Truly, Sky. I love it.” He leans down to kiss my cheek, and says really close to my ear, “I don’t think she’d mind you being my mom. You’re pretty awesome.”
Mellie and Joey come running over and climb in my lap. I let them knock me over, and then Hoppy and Matty come too, and they climb into the pile. I scream, “Help me, Seth!” from the pile, but I don’t want to get out of it. I love every minute of my life.
I see Matt’s red and green socks right by my head. He leans down. “Does Mommy need some help?”
“Please!” I cry. I pretend to bat at the kids, but I’m really tickling them. They giggle and fall off the pile, and then climb back on.
Matt starts to pluck them off one by one until I’m a breathless mess on the floor trying to catch my wits so I can sit up. He holds a hand out to me.
Around noon, Friday’s son Jacob shows up with his mom and dad. He brought a few of his favorite toys that Santa brought for him and Friday has a few under her tree for him to open too. Then her friends Garrett and Cody show up with their daughter Tuesday. And we’re all suddenly really glad we renovated the apartments so there’s more room.
There are people everywhere. But that’s what it’s like at the Reeds’.
Emily’s parents come by, and my mom and dad drop by briefly. People are in and out all day long. We stay, because we don’t want to be anywhere else. This is our family. It’s big and loud and we don’t want to change it. I want my kids to be steeped in the same love and compassion that Matt was, and I want it all to carry over. It’s so different from my own childhood.
Matt puts his arm around me. “You doing okay?” he asks. “Would you rather go home?”
I shake my head and step onto my tiptoes so I can kiss his cheek. “Nope. I want to be here.”
“Has anyone seen Josh today?” Pete asks.
“I’ll call him,” Sam says. But the phone rings and rings and rings. “I wonder where he is,” Sam muses.