Mary buzzes me in after I tell her who I am. She’s waiting at the open door to the apartment, grinning at me.

“Kelsey come back here?”

The smile slips. “Yeah. Didn’t you know?”

“She didn’t exactly tell me goodbye.”

Mary just shakes her head and rolls her eyes. “Coffee?”

“Thanks.” I look around. “Where is she?”

“Shower.”

Given how she ran out of the house, I doubt she’d be happy if I went into her room.

A door on the opposite side of the living room opens and some guy wanders out, scrubbing a hand over his face. We just watch him walk to the front door and leave. He didn’t even look at either of us.

“Another one bites the dust,” Mary sings quietly, and I choke on my coffee.

The guy did look tired and drained. At least someone had a good time last night.

“Is he gone?” the roommate calls. I’m not really sure which one. I only met them once.

“Yep,” Mary answers.

“Glad that is over,” the blonde says, coming from her room, wearing a thin, short, green robe.

“What the hell are you doing here?” she asks when she sees me.

“Shelby doesn’t like visitors,” Mary says.

Shit. Should I go?

“Never mind her.” Mary passes me a cup of coffee.

“Excuse me. I do live here,” Shelby argues as she walks into the kitchen and grabs a mug.

“Cut another one loose?” Mary asks with a smirk.

“As if I want a relationship with a guy who majors in history.” She takes a drink of coffee. “I just wanted to know if he was a good fuck.”

I nearly choke on my coffee.

“Shelby only keeps guys around long enough to fuck them. Lets them treat her to movies, dinner, whatever, drawing them in until they’ve earned a spot in her bed.” Mary’s lips quirk. “If she were a spider, she’d drain their blood when she was done, toss their carcasses from her window, and move on to the next.”

“Very funny,” Shelby smirks then glares at me. “This isn’t a waiting room, as if you have an appointment or something. Some of us live here so if you want to visit with Kelsey, do it in her room.”

“Excuse me.” Either Shelby’s the biggest bitch I’ve met in my life, or she is in dire need of coffee. Or, the guy she just wasted time on sucks in bed.

I knock on Kelsey’s door, but there’s no answer. I knock again and wait.

“Go in or leave,” Shelby snaps at me.

Since I have no intention of leaving, I go into Kelsey’s room to wait. I can hear the shower running and just stand there, not sure what to do.

“I’ll print out a list of house rules and leave it on the counter. Read them before you come back.” Shelby slams Kelsey’s door behind me.

The shower shuts off and I look for a place to sit and wait. The bed is probably not a good idea, so I grab the chair.

Kelsey’s only wearing a big towel, and rubbing her wet hair with another when she walks into her bedroom. She stops when she sees me. “What are you doing here?” she asks slowly.

“You never said goodbye.”

“Really? You didn’t strike me as being that sensitive.” She disappears again. I get that she probably doesn’t like the surprise of me just showing up in her room, but I didn’t like her just leaving like she did.

Kelsey comes back a minute later wearing a thick, long robe. “Look, Alex. I just needed to get home. That’s all.”

“You had some place more important to be?”

“I’ve got to study.”

A perfect and available excuse I’m not buying. “What’s really going on, Kelsey?”

“Nothing.” She shrugs and grabs a comb off a dresser.

“Don’t lie to me. Things were great last night, but you practically ran out on me this morning. I want to know why.”

She sinks onto the bed and looks me in the eyes. “This isn’t going to work.”

I’m being dumped. “Why?”

“We’re not going to fuck.”

“I know!”

“You want to.”

“Yeah!”

“So, eventually, you’ll get tired of not getting any and things will end.”

Now, I’m pissed. “What kind of guy do you think I am?”

“A guy with a cock.”

“Well, I certainly don’t think with it, or feel with it. I’m not an animal that’s going to jump on you the first chance I get.”

Her shoulders slump, and she looks down. “I know.”

“And, I can assure you, that if whatever this is ends between us, it will not be because you wouldn’t sleep with me. So what’s the real problem?”

She looks up and her brown eyes meet mine. “Me.”

“Oh, the ‘it’s not you, but me’ speech.”

“What?” Then she shakes her head. “Yes. No. I don’t know.”

“Or, is it a ghost?” I have to ask the question. There’s no point in even trying to talk to her if Brandon is always going to be there.

“Ghost?”

“Brandon.”

“What’s he got to do with this?”

“You said his name in your sleep last night. Then you couldn’t wait to get away from me. I’m not sure if it’s because you can never be close to anyone else, you are still in love with him, or you’re keeping him alive and preventing yourself from living.”

Kelsey just blinks at me, as if I’ve just spoken a foreign language. “This has nothing to do with Brandon.”

“You dreamed about him,” I remind her.

“I sometimes do, but that doesn’t mean anything.”

“Are you still in love with him?” I need to know before I try and figure out the us part.

“No.”

I believe her, only because of the conviction in her voice and the sadness in her eyes.

“A part of me will always love him. He was my first love. Father of my child. I miss him and the friendship we shared.”

Is it more than she’s willing to admit to herself?

“A part of me will always miss him, but I’m not going to stop living too. I was a kid. Besides, even if I was holding onto Brandon’s memories and not moving forward with my life, he’d haunt me and kick my ass.”

I am so relieved to hear her say that, but it still doesn’t explain her sudden change from going to sleep and waking up. “So, it’s not Brandon that’s between us?” I clarify.

“No. Just me.”

“His name is tattooed on your body,” I remind her.

This time she smiles. “I wanted a foot. You put it there. Remember?”

I wonder how long that decision will haunt me.

“He is my past. A very important part of my past. Yeah, I’ll have those memories always. I want them. He still lives in a small part of my heart, and I freely give him access. Brandon and Brandy live there together. But, that doesn’t mean I don’t want to belong to another person again someday.”

The tension I’ve been holding begins to let go. “Okay.”

“Is that what this was about? You thought I was holding onto a ghost? You were jealous of Brandon?”

“I didn’t know what to think, Kelsey. You’re the one who ran out.”

She turns and walks back to the bed and sinks down on it. “It is me and not you.”

Shit. Here it comes.

“You scare me. I scare me.”