‘I can’t bear to think you have to go back tomorrow, Jack.’ Rita found it hard to believe that the all-too- brief hours of his leave were almost over. They had had such a wonderful day on the farm and the children had been all over him, begging him not to go when they’d finally set off in the cart to return home to Empire Street. Rita had kept smiling, even though she felt exactly the same way. Michael had clearly thought that if he hugged Jack hard enough he wouldn’t need to leave. Rita only wished that were true. Now they were standing in the little back yard of the shop. Jack had managed to do the much-needed repairs to the damaged wall in the last of the fading daylight.
‘You know I’d rather be here, even if I can’t be with you,’ he said, laying down his trowel and wiping his hands on the old rag she’d found for him. ‘But those ships won’t defend themselves without the Fleet Air Arm, you know that. We’ve all got to do our duty.’
‘I’m proud of you, Jack.’ Rita looked at him longingly. ‘There won’t be a day I won’t think about you.’
‘It’s knowing that that keeps me going,’ he said, staring at her intently. ‘And you know it.’
Rita looked away reluctantly, not wanting to break eye contact, but unable to bear the longing she saw there, which so mirrored her own. ‘I do know, Jack. Stay safe for me, won’t you? That’s all I ask.’
He reached out a warm hand and tenderly caressed her arm. ‘Hadn’t I better go now? Or your lovely mother-in-law will be on the warpath.’
Rita shook her head. ‘No, for once she’s got Mrs Delaney round and they’re sitting in a room which faces the other way. As long as you leave via the back alley, nobody will be any the wiser. You’d better not go out of the shop door or everyone will know about it – it’s just the time that people head for the Sailor’s Rest.’
‘How’s the shop doing, Reet?’ he asked suddenly. ‘Only I couldn’t help noticing when I was there that the shelves aren’t as full as they used to be. Is that because folk can’t afford to buy as much these days – or are you in trouble?’
‘Oh, Jack.’ Rita had wanted to forget about her money problems for an evening. Now even Jack seemed to have cottoned on to the parlous state of the business. ‘Don’t let that worry you. I’ll deal with it. Yes, things are going through a rough patch, but I’ll think of something.’
He gave her a straight look. ‘Reet, you can’t go on carrying this place all on your own. I’m not daft, I can see what’s going on. You’ll wear yourself out, I know what you’re like.’
‘Really, it’s all right,’ Rita insisted. She had her pride. She wouldn’t beg for help, not from this wonderful man who’d already made it clear he wanted to give her so much.
‘Reet, come on.’ He shook his head in mock exasperation. ‘Look, if you’re short of money I can lend you a bit. There aren’t that many places to spend my earnings out on the ocean wave. They pay me all right too. I might even get a promotion soon.’
‘Jack, that would be wonderful and you deserve it.’ Her hand flew to her mouth. ‘But you can’t give me your money. I won’t take it. It’s not right. I know you mean well but I couldn’t do it. Don’t ask me again, it’ll only cause hurt between us, and I can’t bear that on top of seeing you go.’ Her eyes were bright with tears. He stepped towards her and enveloped her in an embrace.
‘Well, don’t be afraid to ask me if you need to – that or anything else,’ he said softly into her wonderful thick hair. ‘There’s not much I wouldn’t do for you, Reet. Anything you want, you only have to ask.’
‘I know.’ She looked up at him, his dear, familiar face, now leaner than before, and showing signs of the difficulties she knew he must be facing day in, day out. ‘It means a lot to me to hear you say it. Even though I can’t accept.’ A sudden noise from the direction of the back alley made her start. ‘What was that?’
Jack shrugged. ‘Probably nothing, a stone or something blowing in the wind.’
Rita frowned. It wasn’t even breezy, so that couldn’t be it. Then she remembered again the cat from the Sailor’s Rest, and told Jack about that incident. ‘Silly creature’s probably looking for somewhere more peaceful than the pub on a Saturday night,’ she said. ‘I’m just glad it was nobody looking at us. I’m not ashamed to be with you, but it wouldn’t do any good if people round here started talking. You know what it can be like.’
‘I do, Reet. I wouldn’t do anything to tarnish your good name,’ he assured her. ‘And nobody can see over that wall now I’ve mended it good and proper, so don’t you worry yourself about that. It’ll withstand anything that Jerry throws at it from now on.’
‘I hope it doesn’t get put to the test,’ breathed Rita, meaning it with all her heart. ‘I’ve had enough of those damn raids to last a lifetime. And my name is mud already, thanks to Charlie taking off like that, and now everyone knows he’s done a runner and is a coward on top of that. So I don’t need anything else to set off even more gossip. I’m sorry we have to be so cloak and dagger.’
‘I understand,’ said Jack. ‘It won’t always be like this, Reet. We’ll find a way. I respect you for not wanting to divorce him, even though it means we’ll have to wait longer to be together. But that’s all it is. We’ll manage it, one day. I promise you.’
‘Will we, Jack?’ Her face was full of longing. ‘That day can’t come fast enough. Sometimes I can hardly get up in the morning, wondering what dreadful things are about to happen, here or at the hospital. But it’s defeatist to talk like that, isn’t it? If I’ve got a lifetime with you to look forward to, I’ll get through all this somehow. No matter what they say about me, as long as I know you love me, I’ll be all right.’
‘And I do love you, Reet, more than I can say.’ Jack gazed at her and pulled her close to him once more in a heartfelt embrace.
Rita couldn’t resist. It was what she wanted more than anything and she melted into his arms, marvelling at the way he was so gentle and yet so strong. At last, someone to take care of her – even if he would be gone tomorrow. Tomorrow would just have to take care of itself.
Later, as she slowly undressed in her bedroom, she went over and over the events of the day, particularly those final moments. Jack was the man for her and always had been – what a pity she hadn’t realised it sooner or been in a position to do something about it. How different sharing a bed with him would be. She hardly dared let herself imagine. He’d care for her, treating her well, loving her properly, nothing like the harsh brutality of Charlie. She shuddered involuntarily at the memory. Her husband had taken no notice of what she wanted or when, satisfying his own urges no matter what, and sometimes worse than that too. Then of course he’d taken himself off elsewhere, and at first she hadn’t known whether to be disappointed and humiliated or relieved. It was a dire state of affairs whichever way you looked at it. But with Jack … she sighed. That would be another thing entirely. Dare she dream that it would happen, one day? She slid beneath the cool sheets and wished with all her heart that somehow, one day, they would be together.
Over the back wall, in the alley just beginning to be lit by moonlight, a quiet figure slunk away from where it had been standing, listening to the whole conversation and then watching the silhouette of Rita through the thin fabric of the bedroom curtains. How he hated her. How he’d make her pay for chatting up her fancy man. He could show her a few things she wouldn’t forget in a hurry. She might think her war hero was going to rescue her, but he’d remind her of what a real man could do first. Then she’d be very, very sorry.