My alarm blared at me what seemed like seconds after I'd put my head down on the pillow. In the darkness, I groped for my phone to mute the offending sound. Then, with a grunt, I threw it back down on the nightstand, hoping for a few more hours of sleep. The previous night's exercise hung heavily on my eyelids and behind my temples. But there were things to do, school to attend, volunteering to complete…
The list continued in the back of my mind as I pushed myself out of bed. Sand in my bedsheets scratched against my palms, and with a wave of my hand, I magically returned it to the beach. My sister might've had some questions about why I was tracking sand in when I'd said I was volunteering at the animal shelter last night.
My summer schedule had been jampacked with activities as I tried to fit every last extra-curricular onto my college applications. As long as I continued getting straight As, too, I had to get a scholarship and a spot at Georgetown. That had been my goal for about a year, and I was so close I could taste it.
But first I had to get myself out of bed.
With a loud whine, I stood and headed to the bathroom. My bones ached and protested the movement, and every part of me wished to go back to my soft pillows. Gavon once told me that Warriors don't whine, we just do. So I went, but I still whined.
Because screw him.
After I showered and dressed, I found Nicole in the kitchen, already hard at work cooking breakfast for the two of us. Of all the lives I'd ruined, hers had been the most affected by my stupidity. Just twenty-two, she'd dropped out of college to work full-time to pay the bills. She never told me much, but I knew things were tight financially. The only thing we had was the house, which we were able to sell to pay off Jeanie's debts. If Jeanie had left anything to us in her will, we didn't know about it, thanks to Gram…
At times, I had flashes of my grandmother, and I knew that something had happened to make me unbelievably angry at her. But when I stretched my memory for more, it went blank. I sensed there was magic at play, but all I knew for sure was we were completely on our own.
Nicole grinned when I shuffled into the kitchen. She and I looked a lot alike, with brown hair and pale complexions that burned rather than browned in the Florida sun.
"Good morning, senior!" she chirped loudly as she bounced around the kitchen, assembling my breakfast.
"You didn't have to go all out," I said, sliding onto a chair.
"Of course I did! You're a senior. It's such a fun year. Togas and homecoming and crowns and—"
"And if you think I'm going to do any of that nonsense…" I yawned as I pulled my phone to me, tapping at the screen to display my calendar for the week. "So I've got volunteer work this afternoon then I'm spending a few hours tutoring at the library. I won't be back until late, but I'll have my phone."
"Do you really have to keep volunteering?" Nicole asked, joining me at the table. "You should lighten your load a bit now that you're back in school."
I shook my head. "Georgetown's not going to see it that way."
Nicole pursed her lips. She wasn't exactly dissuading me from pursuing the college of my dreams, but she wasn't enthusiastic about it. "Georgetown is a lot of money, you know," she said, cleaning the pan in the sink. "It's not just tuition. It's books and fees, dorm and food—"
"I know," I said, shoveling the eggs into my mouth. "I've looked at all the fees and charges and I know how much I need every semester. And if they don't give me scholarships, I'll get loans."
"I don't want you saddled with thousands of dollars in debt, Lexie," Nicole said. "Why not try a local school here? You could save all your money and—"
"I'm not staying here." That was final. Too many memories in this town, none of which I wanted to bring with me. And even though I wanted to protect Nicole, I didn't want to be…so close to her. I couldn't even sneeze in my bedroom without her yelling "Bless you." I'd be lying if I didn't admit that part of my busy schedule was to get away from her, although I felt horrible about it.
"You're still a kid, Lexie," she said quietly, taking my now-empty plate from me. "I don't want you to have to grow up too soon."
"I'll take care of my dishes," I said, and, using a quick bit of magic, washed and dried my plate and returned it to the cabinet in the blink of an eye.
Nicole stared at her empty hands, but said nothing. Ever since…well, all that had happened, she'd been less enthused about the idea of magic. For her, it was simple to pretend she was a nonmagical. Potion-makers lacked the ability to transport, conjure, or even summon. Nicole's healing potions could replenish two-thirds of my magic with a single sip, but her cauldron had disappeared with the rest of our belongings when we'd sold the house. Now, the only thing she brewed was coffee.
As for me, I could ignore my magic as easily as I could stop breathing. The hum against my skin was ever-present, the urge to practice always there, even overpowering my guilt.
"I guess I should be going," I said, after a too-long pause.
"Have a good day at school," Nicole said, a little too brightly, the way she always did when we ventured into uncomfortable territory.
I walked out of the kitchen and summoned my bag. Then, making sure Nicole wasn't watching, I transported myself to school.
Transport spells were pretty routine now. The bathrooms in the arts wing were usually unpopulated this early in the morning, so I'd use my magic to find an empty stall and appear there. I'd wait a few breaths to make sure no one was in the bathroom with me then head to my locker.
Before I did, I checked my phone, just in case. Knowing what the outcome would be, I tapped out a short note to add to the long string of unanswered messages.
It's the first day of senior year. I wish you were here.
I waited.
Read 7:34am
Marie and Nicole had lasted two weeks in our apartment before their first blow-up fight. I'd come home to them screaming at each other with red faces, and had to play referee to calm them both down. Marie had stormed out—nothing new for my second oldest sister, who had the temper of a five-year-old.
It was new when she didn't come home.
At first, I'd been terrified Gavon or Cyrus had taken her. After being kidnapped myself (and being plagued by dreams of it for weeks afterward), I was almost certain she was being tortured—or worse. Nicole had seemed less concerned, but to calm me down, she'd sent Marie a text, which came back with a read receipt. That was enough for her; after all, it was doubtful Cyrus knew how to work a phone. And there was probably no cell reception in New Salem.
After three weeks and fifty more read-but-unanswered texts, I stopped trying. Whatever had set Marie off had been so bad that she didn't even want to communicate. And when an entire month passed without change, I realized this would be our new normal. Marie had always threatened to move out, but she hadn't even graduated high school. Though, knowing her, she'd probably used her magic to forge a diploma.
But because I'm a glutton for punishment, I still sent her texts on birthdays and holidays, along with the occasional photo, and got read receipts back. Eighteen months seemed like a long time to hold a grudge, but that was Marie. Even though we'd never gotten along, I missed her. We'd formed this strange unspoken bond when she'd healed me after sparring lessons, although I'd found out it was only because Gavon had agreed to give her money in exchange.
I glanced at my phone again. As far as I knew, Gavon had never made good on that promise, but Marie had to be getting money from somewhere. She was pretty, but she didn't like to work very hard. I tried not to think about all the other ways she could be supporting herself.
But there was nothing to be done about it, so I silenced my phone and magicked it back into my backpack, shifting mentally from Marie to the day ahead.
The first day of school always felt fresh and new, although today was bittersweet. Excited energy permeated the halls as I meandered toward the senior lockers. Doe-eyed freshmen greeted their friends and cast wary glances at seniors. Ragged juniors trudged like zombies, and I felt for them. My junior year had been jampacked with SATs, and college preparations, and every advanced and dual enrollment course I could fit into my schedule. This year seemed like a breeze comparatively, but I needed to keep my grades up all the way through to graduation. I had big plans, and I wasn't going to let anything derail them.
I stopped in the middle of the hallway, my gaze landing on a new face. That, in and of itself, was cause for surprise. My school was pretty small, and rarely did we get new kids enrolling. But add on to that the dark hair and thick, gorgeous lashes lining light eyes that could've been blue or green. Sharp cheekbones and full lips that complimented his soft, pale skin. My magic definitely saw something it liked as it squirmed and throbbed in my stomach. I couldn't tear my eyes away, caught by the sexy way the corners of his mouth turned up in amusement when he caught me staring.
At once, a thousand book-and-movie plots ran through my head and I hated myself for feeling so…smitten by a stranger. For all I knew, he could've been a serial killer—or worse, a distraction.
College, Lexie. Remember you need to get into college. You need lots of money to get into college. You are broke. You have no parents.
Well, I had a…
No. No parents.
I turned my flushed cheeks away, hoping it was just the shock of a new person that had caused such a reaction, and not that I was becoming, well, twitterpated. I'd had my share of crushes over the years, but my dating life was about as empty as my magic after I sparred. It was difficult to date in such a small school—most people were already paired off and would probably marry their significant other right out of school. Besides that, I'd always felt like an outsider, even before magic made the division clearer. I couldn't even count a best friend amongst my peers, let alone a boyfriend.
But this guy, wow. Handsome and new. He'd get snapped up quick.
By someone other than me. I had bigger things to focus on.
Still, when he followed me into my first period class, my heart skipped a beat. His gaze lingered on me as he passed by to sit behind me, and my fluttering heart began to race. This couldn't be a coincidence. Was there actually a super cute guy who thought I was cute?
I struggled to keep it together, feeling his gaze on the back of my head and worrying if I'd brushed my hair this morning. Or if my shirt was crooked, or my underwear was showing over the tops of my jeans, or—
Get it together, Lexie.
This was why I didn't date. Not even ten minutes after meeting this guy, and I was already a mess. I retrieved my English notebook from my bag and wrote down my to-do list for the evening, if only to tear my brain away from Super Hot Guy.
Finally, the morning announcements were complete and the teacher, Ms. Grace, introduced herself and the expectations for the year. Then, she called attendance.
"Alexis Carrigan?"
I raised my hand. "I prefer Lexie."
The boy snorted behind me, reminding me of his presence. Well, at the very least, I'd find out his name. Then I could spend the rest of the year trying to forget it. Maybe Ms. Grace would put us in alphabetical order, and he'd be on the other side of the classroom.
"James Riley?"
"Right here."
The pen fell out of my hand.