I’M WITH YOU
“Oh, wow. Wow, wow, wow,” Faith breathed, her eyes wider than I’d ever seen them.
We were about halfway up the embankment, slowly ascending toward the castle with all of Budapest laid out before us like a rug. The Chain Bridge and river promenade, now far below, were children’s toys left lying on the vast carpet, growing ever smaller as we rose up the hill. The setting sun painted all the world gold, like a sepia camera lens had been slipped over my eyes.
“This is amazing.” Her tone was hushed, full of wonderment as she took in the view. I’m sure it was spectacular, but I didn’t see any of it. I was distracted by a far more beautiful sight.
My eyes were locked on her face.
Tracing the curve of her lips. Memorizing their supple softness. Imagining how they’d feel against my own.
As I watched her, I felt it rise within me like a tidal wave — unfamiliar, irrepressible, undeniable.
Fear.
I hadn’t been frightened when I was bleeding out in a med-evac helicopter in a Bosnian war zone. I hadn’t felt fear coursing through my veins when I’d been stranded in the deserts of Afghanistan without a satellite phone or water source for miles. I hadn’t experienced terror when I’d been captured by enemy insurgents during an entirely off-the-books surveillance mission.
But I was scared as hell at just the thought of kissing Faith Morrissey.
“Look, Wes! You can see the steeples of St. Stephen’s Basilica from here!” She let out an appreciative sigh. “God, isn’t it beautiful? Have you ever seen anything so gorgeous in your entire life?”
My eyes moved over her face as hers swept the city. “No.” I cleared my throat roughly. “I haven’t.”
She was totally enthralled by the panorama of old-world elegance that seemed to stretch on for miles in every direction — my detachment didn’t even register on her radar. My knee bounced up and down, keyed-up with adrenaline. She was supposed to be the one reeling out of control. And yet, somehow, the world had been flipped on its head because I was the only mess of nerves inside this goddamned floating glass box.
I pinched the bridge of my nose and pressed my eyes closed. For the first time in more than a decade, I found myself falling back on old habits. I started to count.
One.
She leaned slightly forward in her seat to stare through the glass, her fear of heights completely forgotten. “This is amazing. You can see all the way to City Park from here!”
Two.
Her hand tightened on mine, squeezing in excitement and anticipation. We were almost to the top. “Seriously, Wes. I’m sorry I gave you a hard time. I love this.”
Three.
I opened my eyes when I heard her gasp. The setting sun had just peeked out from behind a cloud, illuminating the river’s surface with shafts of buttery light. It gleamed like a gold-plated mirror.
Faith’s voice was awed. “Thank you for sharing this with me.”
Four.
She glanced in my direction. “Wes?” she asked, staring into my eyes with a question swimming in her own. “You still with me?”
Five.
I took a deep breath, leaned into her space, and lifted one hand to lace through the hair at her temple. She stilled, her eyes melted like superheated caramel, and her jaw quivered slightly as realization crept into her gaze. She was a little bit terrified of us, of this, too.
Somehow, that made it easier to banish my own indecision.
“I’m with you, Red,” I muttered, an instant before I brought my lips down on hers in a crushing kiss that made my mind empty of everything except the way her mouth felt as it moved slowly beneath mine.
The instant our lips met, my fear vanished like it had never existed. I had no idea why I’d been afraid in the first place. This, right here, with my mouth pressed against hers, was the safest I’d felt in years.
The safest I’d ever felt.
My tongue in her mouth, my hands on her face — I wasn’t chaste or slow. I could barely control myself now that I finally had her in my arms. And as I lost myself in her, I found the man I’d buried deep, so long ago I could barely remember him.
I was drowning in her — this time I didn’t fight it.
I let her waves drag me under, and found myself praying I’d never be forced to resurface.