Chapter 28
I quickly wolf down my dinner and am back in my room with Lightyear when Rand-El and Spotch arrive. Spotch seems a little put out.
“What’s so important that we had to rush over here? I didn’t even get to finish my dessert.”
“GET to finish your dessert? Wait, you actually like the synthesized food?”
“Sure. It’s just like what we have back home. These synthesizers are awesome.”
“But there’s no flavor.”
“What’s flavor?”
I make a mental note to cross Spotch’s home planet off my list of future vacation destinations. I sense a bit of impatience from the two of them, so I make my reveal of Lightyear, who I had hiding under the desk.
“Whoa. What the heck is that?”
“THAT is Lightyear. He’s our new pet. Well, sort of, anyway.”
“He’s sort of yours?”
“No, he’s all ours. He’s sort of a pet. My dad brought him home from the lab today. But that’s not the best part!”
“He ate your spare glasses and horked them up again? That’s gross, Kelvin.”
“No, he ate a ball and threw them up. And I don’t even have spare glasses.”
“So he ate someone else’s glasses and horked them back up again. You can’t really blame him. I’d have an upset stomach, too, if I swallowed a ball and a pair of glasses.”
“No, he threw up an exact copy of my glasses! Made of the same rubber as the ball!”
“Impossible. He could have gotten ahold of those glasses anywhere. They’re a fairly common style, after all.”
“Oh yeah? Well, how about Rand-El’s glasses? They’re pretty unique, wouldn’t you say?”
“Not on my planet, they aren’t. But out here most of you guys only have two or three eyes, so yeah.”
“Okay, now take them off and hold them in front of Lightyear.”
Rand-El obviously isn’t too keen about this, but he does it anyway. I unscrew the lightbulb from my desk lamp and give it to Lightyear, who immediately inhales it like he hasn’t eaten in days. His stomach begins to churn and make the same strange noises it did when he ate the ball. His entire body starts to lurch and convulse, until he finally opens his mouth wide and…
I explain that Lightyear makes replicas of whatever he happens to see as he’s eating, made of whatever substance he’s eating. And he’ll eat anything. Then I pull out a few of my other replica experiments to show Spotch and Rand-El. A toothbrush made of notebook paper. A Commander Virtue action figure made of picture frame metal and glass. A size 8 left-foot space boot made of synthesized macaroni and cheese.
We try a few more experiments, and then Rand-El abruptly changes the subject. “This is awesome, Kelv, and I almost hate to mention it, but have you come up with any ideas for getting us into your dad’s lab to check out that robot? Remember, tonight is the only time everybody can make it.”
Oh, I’ve thought about it. Pretty hard, in fact. And Mr. Smartest Kid in the Universe still hasn’t come up with squat. “I don’t know what to tell you, guys. Like I said, the only way into that lab is with a key card, and both my parents will be at Bula’s art fair tonight. And they never leave the LIV space without those cards. In fact, they’re heading out in about twenty minutes. I don’t know what else to tell you. It’s not like I have my own copy.”
“I’ll be right back,” I say. “You guys look for something made of plastic.”
Dad usually keeps his card on the entrance table when he’s home, and I’m hoping that’s where it is now. Yes! There it is! I snatch the card and head back toward my room.
“Just a minute there, young man. I think you know better than to try pulling something over on us.”
It’s Mom. Dang. I was so close.
“Your friends need to go home, Kelvin. Your father and I are leaving soon, and you know you can’t have anyone over when we’re not here.”
“Oh… um… right. Sorry. I guess I lost track of the time. They’ll be gone in five minutes, okay, Mom?”
“That’s fine. And I’m sorry I jumped on you like that.” Mom looks disappointed in herself. “I should know you wouldn’t intentionally do something you’re not supposed to.”
Ugh. Moms really know how to hit you where it hurts. I know I shouldn’t be doing this, but I really need to impress these guys somehow, and this is my chance. It’s not like my Mighty Mega Supergeniusness has been knocking anybody out up to this point. I return to my room with the key card in hand. Spotch and Rand-El don’t look too enthused.
“Did you find anything made of plastic?”
“Well… kind of.”
“Wait, is that your…”
“Retainer. Yeah. It’s the only thing we could find. We’re not even sure if it’s plastic. Maybe if we looked around a little more…”
“There’s no time. You have to leave in a couple minutes. Sorry, but if we want to get into that lab tonight, this will have to do.”
I hold the key card in front of Lightyear, and Rand-El gives him the retainer. I can’t watch. Even Bula never put anything this disgusting in her mouth.
“This better work,” Rand-El says. “I don’t want crooked teeth for nothing.”
“We’ll find out soon enough,” I say. “You guys get ahold of the others and tell them to meet us at the elevator in thirty minutes.”