Chapter 38

And sitting somewhere on its surface is the Zorb! I should be close enough now to pinpoint its exact location.

I probably shouldn’t say this, because I’ve been burned before, but-no! I better not. Best to wait until I actually have the Zorb in my possession this time before I get all braggy and full of myself. Surely I can hold it in another few minutes and then… and then… AHH, THE HECK WITH IT!

I am about to become the most powerful being in the universe, and (don’t do it, you’re just asking for trouble) NOTHING CAN STOP ME! BWAHAHAHA!!!

Why me?! Seriously, is it really asking all that much to become an all-powerful being and rule the entire universe?

How did this happen? All systems were go when I left the space station. It just doesn’t make any sense! Somebody out there must not like me.

And yet, all may not be lost! If I can manage an emergency landing on Zurton without causing too much damage to the robot, I should still be able to make it to the Zorb. Even if this robot has to crawl to get there. And then NOTHING WILL STOP M-good gravy! Will I never learn? Seriously, what is wrong with me?

Uh-oh. The planetoid is coming on fast! It will require every last ounce of my diabolical brilliance to make this work! It will take all the fiendish cunning I can muster to safely stick this landing!

Or I suppose I could push that button over there.

It’s working! The robot is nearly on the ground. Just a hundred feet more. Fifty. Ten. Touchdown!

What madness is this?! Those appear to be children! And if I’m not mistaken, one of them is… no! It can’t be! It’s that Klosmo boy! He must be the one who sabotaged my robot! Well, I know one member of that infuriating family that will never interfere with my plans again!

The robot’s mobility system needs a few minutes to reboot. But then those helmeted hooligans will wish they had never crossed paths with Erik Failenheimer.

Ten minutes later…

That will teach you to interfere with the universe-conquering plans of Erik Failenheimer! BWAHAHAHA!!!

Once I retrieve the Zorb, perhaps, PERHAPS, I’ll come back and free the little doofuses. They can have the privilege of being the first to kneel before my awesome might.

The scanner says the Zorb is up on that distant plateau. I’m so excited I think I’ll run!