Chapter Six
Her workdays at school breezed by and she was fully beginning to believe that she had some real talent in her class. The final project for the end of the fall semester was to stage a short one-act play that the students would write and produce. They were really getting into the writing, which inspired her writing as well.
But it was the evenings that she had finally begun to look forward to again. Each evening Noah would call and “check on her,” as he put it. He wanted to know about her day, her students, and how she was progressing with her play. Once, he brought up Jason.
“I know this may be hard to talk about, and you probably want to put it all behind you, but . . . if that dude gives you any trouble, any . . . you let me know. Understood? Don’t hesitate. Don’t second-guess. I mean that. Promise me.”
She’d wavered for a moment. Knights in shining armor were only in fairy tales. Her life was far from that, but here he was anyway. “I promise,” she’d murmured, even though she wasn’t sure that she meant it.
“Cool, now about Friday . . .”
* * *
“Girl, I leave you unattended for a hot five minutes and you got a new man,” Cara teased as they left the YWCA following their Pilates class. “See, it’s a good thing we didn’t go to the movies together.” She grinned. “There is a method to my madness.”
“Yeah, right, like you had something to do with it.”
“Well,” she dragged the word out. “Not directly, but you know what I’m saying.” She buttoned her coat. “So tell me more.” She hooked her arm through Traci’s.
“Hmmm,” she sighed. “He loves everything that I do. He’s a sax player on the side and has dreams of opening a café-type club. He’s sexy as hell and kisses like . . .” She actually moaned and Cara laughed and nudged her in the ribs. “And . . . he stopped Jason in his tracks.”
“Whoa!” Cara stopped walking. “There is no way you’re going to gloss over that. What the hell happened? And why didn’t you call me?”
Traci revisited that Sunday afternoon in clear but halting detail. If she knew nothing else about Cara, it was that she always sensed when Traci was evading or lying, so there was no point in doing either.
Cara murmured something unrepeatable under her breath. “That bastard. What is he doing around here anyway?”
“I don’t know. I thought he was in Florida.”
“So now he knows you’re here. He hasn’t tried anything since, has he?”
“No!”
“You would tell me if he did?”
“Yes. I would.”
“Well, thank goodness Noah was there. Who knows what that asshole would have tried?” She hugged Traci close.
“We were out in public. There wasn’t much he would have done.”
“Regardless. You never know.” She shook off the icky feeling of thinking about Jason Logan. “Anyway, when am I going to meet Mr. Wonderful?”
“He did say he’d like to meet you, too.”
“So, how ‘bout we take a stroll over to his spot so I can give my stamp of approval before your hot date tonight.”
Traci pursed her polished lips to the side. “You twisted my arm.”
* * *
They walked over to the CoffeeMate just as it began to sprinkle. When they stepped inside, they were immediately welcomed with warmth and the delicious aromas.
“Is he here?” Cara asked without moving her lips.
Traci nudged her in the rib. “Can we at least get inside first?” She casually took a quick look around and her stomach did that dance thing when she spotted Noah emerging from the back.
Noah seemed to sense her presence and his gaze landed right on her. His smile lit his eyes.
“You don’t even have to tell me. That’s him.” Cara hummed in appreciation.
“Yeah,” Traci said under her breath. “You want something?” she asked, heading toward the line of customers.
“I’ll have what you’re having,” she teased.
Traci snickered. “Cara, you’re a married woman.”
“But I ain’t blind.” She chuckled and gave Traci a light shove in the back to move her along the line.
Traci was finally in front of Noah and she felt like a giddy teenager.
“Hey,” she said softly.
“Hey, yourself. The usual?”
Traci nodded. “And the same for my friend Cara.”
Noah’s gaze shifted to the woman standing next to Traci. “Hello, welcome to CoffeeMate. Nice to meet you.”
“Thanks, and you as well. Oh, and I’ll take a blueberry muffin to go along with whatever she’s having.” Cara grinned.
“You can pick your purchases up at the end of the line.” When no one was looking, he gave Traci a wink. Her insides curled in response.
“I usually sit at that table in the back,” Traci said once they had gotten what they’d paid for. She led the way.
“Girrrrl,” Cara said under her breath the instant they sat down. “That is one fine brother—that skin and those eyes and those locs. Humph.” She peeked around a few tables to scope Noah out again. “Not to mention that he’s got your back. You hit the jackpot, my sister.”
Traci knew she’d had a thing for Noah months ago when she’d come in and watch him and long for their brief moments of banal conversation. She’d imagined them being together, but the reality was better than anything she could think up on her own. But every time she felt herself getting close, lowering the walls of fear and doubt, she found herself backing off. If where they were now was any indication of where their relationship could go, she should be ready to jump on for the ride. She wasn’t.
“What’s wrong?”
Traci blinked Cara into focus. She shifted a bit, reached for a napkin, and shrugged off the question. “Nothing. Why?”
“Because I’ve known you for a zillion years and I know when something is bothering you, and worse when you’re lying to me.”
Traci wrapped her fingers around her cup of mocha latte.
Cara tipped her head to the side. “Well, talk to me. What is it?”
“Noah is a great guy. He’s smart, and funny, and well traveled, and sexy. He’s easy to be with.”
“But . . .”
“So was Jason in the beginning.”
Cara’s expression softened. “T, I know Jason did a number on you, but every man is not like Jason.”
“My rational self knows that, but my spirit says something else.”
“This guy, Noah, is the first man that you’ve dealt with in the past two years that actually makes you smile, makes you feel good. I hear it in your voice and see it in the light in your eyes. Since Jason you haven’t had any significant relationship with a man.”
Traci lowered her head, then shook it slowly. “I’ve tried,” she said softly. She looked up into Cara’s understanding eyes. “I’m scared.”
Cara reached across the table and covered Traci’s hand with her own. “Say it. Say it to me. What are you scared of, sweetie?”
“That he’ll hurt me. That he will be this wonderful man that I can trust and believe in and then he will hurt me, mentally and physically.” She pushed out a breath, and flashes of her nightmare marriage played in her mind. “There, I’ve said it. I’m afraid. Nothing is as it appears. Nothing and no one.”
“You really believe that, don’t you?”
“Yes, I do. I’m a product of it.” She shook her head. “If I give in, I mean really give in and let Noah into my heart and he hurts me . . . I don’t think I could recover from that, not again.”
“So what are you going to do for the rest of your life? Live in fear and doubt and . . . alone?”
“I have my work, my students.” She offered up a feeble smile. “My best friend.”
“You deserve that and more, but it will never happen if you don’t give yourself a chance to experience it. Just because you’ve been knocked down doesn’t mean that you don’t get back up, T. You’re a survivor. You’ve proven that.”
Traci sighed heavily, then took a long swallow of her latte. “I don’t know.”
“And you never will if you don’t give it a shot.”