Cady

 

I don’t know why I’m doing this. I mean, I know why, but at the same time, I don’t. What purpose me showing up at the bar has to do with anything. I just can’t leave things the way they ended. I need to explain. I want him to at least understand.

He won’t answer my calls and doesn’t respond to my texts. He’s not at his house, and anyone I ask either doesn’t know where he is or won’t tell me. So since I know where he’s supposed to be tonight, I take a shot in the dark and hope that he’s here.

He might be mad at me for not telling him who my dad is, but that’s not a reason to break up. I mean, my God. He talked about a future together, marriage. And now he won’t even speak to me because I omitted one little thing?

No way.

Not having it.

The past few days have been miserable for me, and it pisses me off that he’s being such a stubborn ass about this. I walk into the bar just as the countdown begins and scan the area for him. I don’t even know if he ended up coming or not, but I really freaking hope he did.

Ten

Nine

Eight

Meara is at the bar with Liam, and her face is buried against his chest. His lips brush the top of her hair, and I can see them moving as his hand grips the hair at the back of her head.

Seven

Six

I look away from them, still scanning. Stepping deeper into the crowd of people.

Five

Four

It feels like forever, but I finally see him. My entire body jolts, and I suck in a breath through parted lips at how seeing him gives my body a literal shock.

Three

His head snaps up like he senses me, and dead eyes stare back at me. Blank face. Emotionless.

Two

My heart heavy and soul empty, I pray he doesn’t walk away again.

One

Time stands still as everyone cheers. The glitter and streamers in the air don’t hinder my view of him. Nothing will. He’s not going to make a move, so I do. I take one step, then two, then I stop. Because that stupid bitch with the blond hair and red lips comes out of nowhere and puts both of her skanky hands on his chest and slides them up to his face. She turns his head, and then pulls it down to hers. Just before their lips touch, his eyes find mine again. And I don’t even recognize the man staring back at me.

I can’t remember the way he used to look at me with such promise with his eyes. Can’t hear him telling me how much he cares. Can’t feel his hands on me, worshipping my body. I can’t even remember what he felt like inside me.

All I can do is absorb the pain. To my gut, my heart, my head. The sheer torture of seeing my biggest fucking fear played out in front of me. I never thought he’d do this. I never thought he’d make me regret him, but right now, this pain, the torture of this hurt is going to kill me.

I stumble, my body needing to move, but my feet not allowing the movement. I have to cover my mouth so I don’t puke, and then I turn and get the hell away from here. I push through bodies and don’t even stop my momentum when I reach the door. I yank it open, and even though it’s slippery, I run.

There are so many people outside celebrating the new year, I bump into a few of them on the way. It seems like it takes forever. It’s so cold, and my eyes are so blurry, I have to stick my hands out to make my way to my door. And even if I was able to see, I still wouldn’t have noticed him.

Because my apartment was pitch black. And the second I open my door, I’m pulled through, and my back is slammed against it. “Hi, Cady.” I open my mouth to scream, but Chris puts his hand over it, and I feel something cold and sharp against my neck. “Aren’t you happy to see me?”

I swallow, and the metal digs in a little more. I whimper.

“See, now I thought you were out here all alone, working in the library, reading stories and singing to little kids.” Oh God, he’s had me followed? “But then I see this picture online, and it’s you. And him.” He sneers. “And his mouth is on you, and all those people are watching you misbehave. Kissing boys in public… That is not how a good girl behaves.”

I whimper and choke when I try to gulp in air, but nothing enters my windpipe.

“If I let go, will you be good and stay quiet?”

“Yes,” I mumble behind his hand because I don’t want to nod.

His hand falls away as does the knife, and I suck in lungsful of air. I hear him inhale, and my body quivers in disgust. “Good girl.”

“What do you want?”

“You need to come home. As you can see…” He chuckles because my apartment is mostly black, and I can’t see hardly anything. “I’ve already taken the liberty of packing the things you’ll need. I’ve gotta say, I knew you liked sexy undies, but I had no idea you liked them so, so naughty.”

“Chris, I—”

“You’ll nothing, Cadence. It’s been too long, and I’m through waiting. Time to come home so I can punish you like you deserve.”

“But I—”

A knock on my door makes me jump, Gabriel calling my name makes my eyes wet, and Chris quickly pokes me in the back with the knife. “You say one fucking word, and I’ll gut you. Think lover boy will like knowing he’s the reason you’re dead? Do you really want to put that on him? You know what it feels like to kill somebody you love; do you really want him to live the rest of his life feeling like you do?”

God, he’s evil. So fucking evil.

“Cady, open up.”

“You gonna keep quiet?” Chris poses the question, but we both know there’s only one answer.

“Yes,” I whisper.

“Good girl. Now say goodbye.”

He shoves me so I lurch forward, and I slowly open the door since there’s a knife digging into my back. A fresh swell of tears fall down my cheeks seeing him. God. He’s so damn handsome, and I don’t know if I’ll ever see him again. “Now’s not a good time,” I tell him before he can open his mouth. His mouth that has red fucking lipstick still on it. The knife pokes into my back, and I wince. “You need to leave.”

Gabriel peeks into my apartment, and when he sees that it’s dark, his eyebrows draw together. His already tense body coils even tighter. “Looks like you’re about to go to bed, huh?”

“Yup.”

“You gonna be able to find your bed in the dark?”

I swallow, trying to buy time and subliminally tell him that one wrong move could make it so I have a blade through my back. But when Chris shoves it into my spine, I nearly yelp. “Yes, I always sleep with the lights off.” Please. God, please let him understand what’s happening right now. “So, if you could go so I can go to sleep…”

He studies me for a beat. He blinks and shrugs. “Okay, Cady. You do that. Goodbye.” Then he turns on his heel and walks away.

Chris reaches out and shoves the door closed, then flicks the deadbolt. I stare at the blurry door handle, praying for it to twist and Gabriel to open it again. But I know it’s not going to. He’s not going to. And I wonder why I don’t just let Chris kill me now since I’d rather die than go back to him.

“I knew you could do it.” He drops his hand and flicks on the light in the kitchen.

I jump at the sudden brightness and blink harshly. When I can see clearly, I notice he has a couple of my suitcases packed. I can’t help the whimper that escaped my lips, and Chris leans his head to the side. “I’m not going to hurt you, but it’s time you come home.”

“This is my home.”

He shakes his head. “No, it’s not. You belong with m—”

I jump, and he reaches for his knife when glass breaks from one of the bedrooms. “What was that?” He grabs my hand, and I follow him because I don’t have a choice. He flicks the light on in my bedroom and the bottom square of my window is broken, but it’s just a small hole. “What the fuck?” He looks around, and his hand squeezes mine painfully. “Time to go.”

“Chris, please. I don’t want to go.”

“You’re coming with me, Cadence. Home. Where you belong.”

I cry out when he yanks at my arm, pulling so hard I think he ripped it out of the socket. He drags me down the hallway, and as soon as he reaches the threshold of the kitchen, Gabriel appears out of nowhere and tackles him.

Screaming, I fall to the floor from the sheer terror, covering my eyes when Chris brings the knife up in the air. All I can hear is flesh pounding flesh, and when I peek through my fingers, I see Gabriel straddling Chris, beating him to death. The knife is nowhere to be seen, and I gulp in some air that he didn’t get stabbed by Chris, but then I’m worried someone is going to die tonight; it just won’t be me or Gabriel.

He’s like a machine, his muscles coiled tight, vein in his forehead prominent, harsh breath forced through his teeth with every punch he lands… methodical, manic. Deadly.

“Gabriel.” I whisper his name through tears, not wanting him to kill Chris. “Stop,” I cry. “Stop it!”

And then there’s commotion, and I whip my head up to see the cops storming into my apartment.

“Sir!” A police officer shouts at Gabriel, but that doesn’t stop him. He keeps pummeling Chris. “Sir!” The cop grabs Gabe, but he’s not to be matched. His arms move wild, his nostrils flare, and he bares his teeth when he screams and fights to get his hands back on Chris. “Let me go.”

“Gabriel. Stop,” I plead. His head finally snaps up, and he looks at me, but I can tell he doesn’t see me through his rage yet. “Stop,” I beg. “I’m fine. I’m safe.”

He manages to get free and is coming at me when the cop grabs his arm. “Sir.” And then another comes and grabs his bicep. Gabriel struggles against them.

“Stop, Gabriel. Let him go!” I shriek at them and start to walk across the room, but an officer wraps his arm around my waist. “Let me go.”

“Miss, if you’ll please—”

“Get your fuckin’ hands off her!” Gabriel yells and tears out of the hands of the two police officers and is charging at me.

I struggle against the arm around my waist, not because he’s hurting me but because I need to get to Gabriel before he does something stupid. But I’m too late. He reaches me and grabs my arm, pulling me to him, and at the same time, shoving the cop away from me.

And suddenly, Gabriel’s eyes widen, and his entire being vibrates. He collapses to the floor, and the sound of electricity flowing through his body makes my ears bleed. “Stop it!” I scream. “Stop hurting him!”

I’m once again pulled away, and there’s a flurry of activity, so many cops occupy my apartment and hide my view of what’s happening. I uselessly fight against the hands holding me and stare down at the man I love being dragged away in handcuffs.

 

 

“You didn’t do anything wrong.” Meara hands me a bottle of water, and I take it but don’t open it. All I can do is replay the past two hours in my head. Chris, the knife, Gabriel, the knife, cops, Taser, handcuffs. As soon as the police got my statement and left, I ran back to the bar with tears freezing down my cheeks as they fell. I knew everyone was there, and all that was on my mind was getting Gabriel help. I was barely able to get a word out because I was sobbing so hard, but I knew I had to get it together for him.

The bar was closing, but when I stumbled in, everyone looked over at me. It was like a movie, where time was freeze-framed, and then suddenly, everything moved again at a breakneck speed. As soon as I opened my mouth and told them what happened, they jumped into action. Liam gave Meara and me a ride back to my place, and I heard him saying to her that I shouldn’t be alone, and he’s right. I don’t want her with me. I want Gabriel.

But she’s hanging out with me until Liam gets back since he and the rest of the guys are going down to the jail to see what they can do. I guess they have some connections, so they’re going to try to help him.

All I’ve been able to sit here and think about is his face—how he looked like a totally different person—and I know there’s more to him than he ever told me. He doesn’t just have a temper. He has some major anger issues, and I’m guessing they stem from his childhood, but he never told me about it.

And shame on me for not asking him. He asked all sorts of things about me and wanted to know everything, but I didn’t do the same. I was so intent on keeping the truth about me hidden that who he really was got lost in my lies.

The knock on my door causes me to jolt in my seat, and Meara pats my leg. “Let me see who it is.” I hear the murmur of a male voice, and a second later, I look up and see her with an older man. “Cady, this is James. He’s Jamie’s dad, and he owns a construction company. He’s going to fix your window, okay?”

Gabriel went to Gia’s apartment and crawled over the fire escape and broke my window to cause a diversion. Then he opened my front door, that in all the commotion I realized Chris didn’t lock, to save me. And that he did, but he just destroyed himself in the process.

I nod but find I’m incapable of speaking a word right now. The murmur of their voices are muted from my bedroom, but it wouldn’t matter if they were shouting in front of me right now because I wouldn’t be able to comprehend anything said to me.

I think he’s here for about a half an hour before he leaves, and shortly after that, all the guys come back. I don’t know them, not really, and from the way they’re looking at me, I’m not sure if they know who I am or not. I don’t know if Gabriel told them that I’m Maverick Holiday’s daughter and the person who killed him.

If they do know, they don’t give me any indication that they do. So they’re either really good at pretending, or Gabriel kept it to himself. And knowing him, it’s the latter.

“How are you doin’, Cady?” Mike asks as he squats down in front of me.

“How’s Gabriel?”

“Stuck.” He shakes his head, but it’s Liam who talks. “There’s nothing anybody can do at this point. He assaulted a police officer—”

“No, he didn’t. He—”

Liam shakes his head and squeezes my shoulder. “I know, but that’s the charge. And with his priors…”

He doesn’t have to finish the sentence because I already know where this is going. I’d offer to pay for a lawyer, or several, but the band is already represented by one of the most amazing firms in the country, so my offer would be declined.

There’s nothing anybody can do right now, and frankly, I want these people out of my place so I can be alone. “Thank you for trying to help him.”

“Of course, what else can we do for you?” Jamie tilts his head at me.

“I’m fine.”

Liam holds his hand out for his wife, but Meara reaches over and hugs me. “My number’s on a sticky note on your fridge. Please call me if you need anything.”

“Sure.”

She pulls back, and they all start to make their way to my door, but Mike stops before Liam opens it. “You didn’t do anything wrong, Cady. Gabe’s got no fuse, and if he knew you were blaming yourself for something that he did, he’d be pissed.”

It must be written on my face that I feel that way. I simply shrug because I don’t agree. It is my fault.

“I don’t know what happened between you guys, but we’re all a family, Cady. And you obviously mean something to Gabe, so like it or not, we’re gonna be lookin’ out for you until he can again.”

One big family just like my dad and his band, except I never leaned on any of them after Dad died when they offered or tried because I blamed myself. I think in some way I thought that being treated like I did by Chris was my punishment for causing the accident that killed my father; even though I know my dad would be pissed at me if he were still alive.

I offer Mike a tentative smile this time, and he presses his lips together and gives me a curt nod before he and the rest of them leave. The door barely clicks shut before I rush down to my bed and throw myself in face first, shoving my head into a pillow and screaming into it as sobs overtake my nervous system, and my breath hitches and my body spasms.