“We should get another opinion,” Alex said once he’d recovered his breath. It was almost impossible to grasp what the specialist was saying. Hell, he didn’t want to grasp it.
From where he stood at the end of the bed, the doctor looked down at them with sympathetic eyes. “Mr. Valente, I understand, but it won’t make any difference to the outcome. Our tests were very thorough.” He paused. “I’m sorry.”
But Alex wasn’t convinced. He glanced at Olivia. “We should try elsewhere. We could—”
“No, Alex,” she said firmly. “Enough is enough.”
Up until this moment “no” just hadn’t been in his mindset. Now, dear God, he just couldn’t believe he was being told there was no other answer.
Then he looked at this beautiful woman who was sitting up in the hospital bed, dressed in a white hospital gown, and who had just been through a medical procedure, and her head was held high with courage and determination to get on with her life. He swallowed hard. If she could take the news and put it behind her then how fair was it for him to keep pushing her over this?
“You’re right,” he said, and lifted her hand held tight in his own to kiss her knuckles, letting her see the admiration in his eyes.
She held his gaze for a few seconds and soft pink colored her cheeks before she looked up at the specialist. “Thank you for all your help, doctor.”
The doctor nodded. “I wish it could have been better news, Mrs. Valente.”
“I know.”
Alex stood up and shook the doctor’s hand, then the other man left them alone.
Silence.
He looked at Olivia. “Are you okay?”
It took a moment, but a small, reassuring smile appeared. “Yes, Alex. I’m fine.”
He wasn’t. He still felt gutted. And how she managed to smile through all this was a—
He saw her bury her face in her hands and her shoulders began to shake. “Olivia?”
She gave a small sob.
He sat on the edge of the bed and gently pulled her up against his chest, his heart cramping with pain when he saw the hot tears slipping down her cheeks. “Oh, sweetheart, let it out,” he muttered. “Let it all out.”
That only made it worse. He held her like that for long moments while she cried.
Eventually she pulled back, sniffing and trying to unscrunch a tissue she’d been holding in her hand. “I’m sorry.”
He let his hands slide to her shoulders, needing to keep on holding her. “No, I’m the one who’s sorry. I shouldn’t have put you through that.”
She dabbed her eyes with the tissue. “It’s better that I know for sure.”
He swore. “Better for whom? You…or me?” His chest ached with an inner pain. “I was wrong in asking that of you, sweetheart.”
She shuddered. “Alex, don’t punish yourself. I did this for both of us.”
A feeling in his heart began to morph into something he’d never felt before. It terrified him, so he quickly pushed it aside, not wanting to know. “Thank you,” he said in a hoarse whisper.
She drew a shaky breath. “I think I’ll go to sleep now. It’s getting late. Do you mind?”
He cleared his throat. “Not at all.”
The specialist had said he would keep her in the hospital overnight and Alex was more than glad of that now. She needed to rest.
And he suddenly needed to be alone.
“Get them to call me if you want anything and I’ll come straight over.”
She leaned forward and kissed him softly on the lips. “Thanks.”
He hopped off the edge of the bed and helped her to make herself comfortable, then he kissed her and left the room, the door shushing closed behind her.
It wasn’t until he walked into his hotel room that he dropped down onto the sofa, his legs no longer able to hold him up. He’d gotten this far but now the reality of it was sinking in.
Olivia would never have a baby.
His baby.
Dammit, he’d realized he wanted that more than anything in the world. And it wasn’t just because his father wanted him to have a child.
Then something lodged in his throat and he realized he was wrong about this. Totally wrong. The only thing he wanted more than anything in the world was Olivia herself.
He loved her.
A sense of joy swept over him that went clear through to his soul. He had a heartbeat to savor it, contemplate it. Half a second later, pain slammed into him with the force of a wrecking ball.
He couldn’t tell her, especially not right now. She had enough to cope with without him putting unnecessary pressure on her. And telling a woman he loved her and wanted her to stay married to him forever was definitely immense pressure. He couldn’t do that to her right now.
If at all.
Olivia was glad to leave New York later that week and head back to LA, where they were to spend a couple of days with her mother. Felicia was full of talk about whether she could juggle both the television series and the movie next year, assuming she got the part. It was good to see her mother so enthusiastic and full of promise for the future.
If only she felt as hopeful for the future, too.
But she couldn’t be.
She didn’t want to burst her mother’s bubble so she kept quiet about the conclusive tests for her infertility. Her mother would be devastated.
As she knew Alex was, too. It was the reason he’d been slightly aloof since she’d come out of hospital and hadn’t tried to make love to her. Oh, he’d been wonderful—looking after her and giving her attention, but they were normal everyday things most husbands gave their wives.
Yet she understood where Alex was coming from. He had responsibilities to his father and to his brothers and nothing could change that. He had to step back from her.
Yes, she understood.
But it hurt.
She needed him to tell her everything would be all right.
She needed him to say he wasn’t going to dump her before the twelve months was up.
And right now, as silly as it seemed, she needed him to need her.
“Randall told me he saw you in New York,” Felicia said their first evening at dinner after they’d caught up on other things.
Olivia was glad Alex would be late this evening. It was best they didn’t discuss anything like this in front of him. She didn’t want to give him any reminders about what had happened.
“Yes, and he’s a granddad now, I hear,” she said, pasting on a bright smile to show she could handle it all. She had to put one foot in front of the other and keep moving forward, not stop to think about what she had lost.
Felicia’s mouth curved with affection. “Yes, he told me.” Then her smile faded. “I hope it didn’t upset you, darling?”
Olivia pretended to be surprised. “No, of course not. I love Randall and I’m happy for him.” That was the truth.
“That’s my girl,” Felicia said, leaning over and briefly squeezing Olivia’s hand. “I’m glad you’re over it.” Just as quickly her mother leaned back in the high-backed dining chair. “Darling, I’ve been wanting to tell you for some time that Eric has a child, too, but I wasn’t sure—”
“Shut the hell up, Felicia,” Alex growled from the doorway, taking them by surprise, and both women spun around in their seats.
Felicia started to gulp like a fish. “Well, I never!”
Alex glared at her. “Can’t you see your daughter is upset? Or is that just a bit beyond your comprehension?”
“Alex, don’t…” Olivia warned.
He waved a dismissive hand. “No, Olivia. I won’t be quiet over this. Tell her the truth. Then she might look beyond herself and see your pain like I do.”
Olivia blinked in shock. There was nothing aloof about him now. Her heart skipped a beat.
“What truth, Olivia?” Felicia demanded. “What is Alex talking about?”
Olivia slowly turned. This was going to be painful for her mother. She swallowed, her throat aching. “I can’t have a child, Mum. It’s been confirmed.”
Felicia paled. “Never?”
“No, Mum.”
Her mother’s mouth worked without speaking for a moment. “Oh God, I’ll never be a grandmother?”
“No, Mum,” Olivia said as gently as she could. “I’m afraid this isn’t like the movies. There won’t be a happy ending.”
Seconds ticked by as Felicia stared aghast at her daughter. Then amazingly, something seemed to change inside her mother. Olivia could feel it in the air.
When she looked across at Alex, he had left the room.
“Darling,” Felicia’s apologetic tone began. “Your husband is right. I’ve only been concerned about me, not you. I’m so sorry.”
Shock ran through Olivia. “Mum, it’s okay.”
Her mother shook her head. “No, it’s not. I know my faults. I’m self-centered and irresponsible at times but…” She took a shaky breath and her eyes filled with tears. “Darling, I love you more than life itself. You know that, don’t you?”
The tears welled in Olivia’s eyes, too. “Yes, Mum, I know that. I’ve always known that. And when it comes right down to it, that’s all that matters.”
“Thank you for that, darling,” Felicia said, and grabbed her napkin, dabbing it at her eyes in a theatrical pose that Olivia knew wasn’t a pose at all this time.
Her mother gave a watery smile. “You might need to go see how your husband is,” she prodded. “And please tell him I’m sorry.” She winced. “No, I’ll tell him myself when I see him tomorrow. I need to take responsibility.”
Olivia blinked away the last of her tears and looked again at her mother with new eyes. It had been a long time coming, but Felicia really had changed. Olivia got to her feet and hugged her mother.
Felicia hugged her back, then as Olivia moved away, she asked in concern, “Are you okay with what I said about Eric having a child?”
Olivia nodded. “Absolutely.” And she was. Eric didn’t affect her any longer. At last she was able to leave all that behind her.
Her mother looked pleased. She waved a hand toward the door. “Go see Alex.”
Olivia found Alex in the bedroom, undoing his shirt. Just the sight of him made her heart beat fast.
“That wasn’t a very nice thing to say to my mother,” she said, matter-of-factly.
A pulse beat in his cheek. “She needed to hear it.”
“I know. Thank you,” she said sincerely, seeing him look startled. “It did the trick. I think she’s finally growing up.”
He stopped undressing and his eyes searched hers. “It’s about time she did.”
Olivia wrinkled her nose. “It’s been hard for her to change.”
“It’s hard for anyone to change.”
“Yes, but perhaps it was more difficult for her. She grew up being a spoiled little girl because of her looks, then she became a beautiful spoiled woman, and then a spoiled movie star. Everyone treats her like royalty.”
He stared for a moment before shaking his head with slight amazement. “You don’t realize it, do you?”
She blinked. “What?”
“Your mother may be royalty in the movie world but out here in the real world, you’re the one who is true royalty. You not only have elegance and class, but you have a sense of compassion and understanding and generosity that shines through.”
Her breath hitched, his opinion of her making her feel like jelly inside. No man had ever said such a nice thing to her. “You can’t know that,” she murmured.
He came toward her and put his hand under her chin, looking deeply into her eyes. “I know the person you are, Olivia Valente.”
Then he lowered his head and kissed her, her pulse racing even more when his hands slid down to pull her up against him. He was fully aroused.
She kissed him back. He needed her and that was enough.
For now.
They returned to their apartment in Sydney overlooking the harbor and Olivia was immediately swept up in business dealings with her boutiques. It was a relief to keep busy.
Of their future together Alex didn’t say a word, nor did he mention anything about telling his father and she was coward enough to accept that. Suddenly every moment spent with him was important.
Why, she didn’t want to know.
And then she came home one evening and heard the muffled sound of voices coming from the study. She tapped lightly on the door and opened it and found Alex and his two brothers sitting on the couch, glasses of whiskey in their hands.
Their expressions were welcoming but she suspected they’d been discussing something important and didn’t really appreciate the interruption.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were all here,” she said, ready to step back and leave them to it.
But Alex was already coming toward her. “Sweetheart, you don’t have to apologize,” he said, the loving husband. “We’re just discussing business.” He swooped in for a kiss in a possessive manner she knew was only for show.
She kissed him back, welcoming the feel of his lips on hers after a day spent away from him.
“Um…I’d better go get some dinner,” she said, once he eased back and let her go.
“There’s a casserole in the oven.”
Up close, Olivia could see his eyes already turning back toward business. “Great.” She forced a smile. “Have you eaten?”
“Yes.” She looked at the other two men to ask them if they’d like something, but Alex spoke before her. “They’ve eaten, too.”
“Oh.”
“Yes,” Nick said with a polite smile. “We’ve eaten.”
“But thanks anyway,” Matt, the youngest, said.
She could see they were wanting to get back to their discussion. “I’ll leave you to it.”
She stepped back and closed the door, then went to take a shower before eating, but she grew more worried with each passing moment. Had Alex told them about his father’s ultimatum after all? And not just about needing to marry but about having a child as well? He had nothing to hide from them any longer. He had already married her. And now there would be no baby.
Her heart ached. Then something occurred to her. Perhaps Alex had asked them here to discuss a new plan?
Or a new wife?
She gulped. No, she couldn’t believe he would say anything about her infertility to his brothers. Not without her consent.
Still, later when he slid into bed in the dark she had to ask. “Is everything okay?”
“Yes.”
“You all looked quite preoccupied.”
“There’s a small problem. We can deal with it.”
She swallowed hard, hoping she wasn’t the problem they would deal with. Then she pushed it out of her mind and tried to get some sleep.
But the next morning as she came out of the bathroom after finishing her shower, she heard Alex talking on the phone and she stopped dead.
“Dad, I need to see you about something,” he was saying quietly, his back to her. “I’ll be there in half an hour.”
There was a pause.
“Cancel your appointment, Dad. This is important. It can’t wait.”
Another pause.
“Right. See you soon.” He hung up, pushed himself to his feet and reached for his trousers. Then he saw her and he seemed to freeze. Or was that just her imagination?
He scowled. “You look pale. Are you okay?”
She forced herself to move. “Yes, I’m fine. The shower was a bit too hot, that’s all.” She half expected he would tease her about them making steam in the shower, only he didn’t. He had that distant look back on his face.
“You take it easy, Olivia. You’ve been rushing around too much lately.”
“Thank you for your concern,” she said, unable to stop a hint of coolness to her voice.
He held her eyes for a beat, looking slightly puzzled, then turned away to glance at the bedside clock. “I have to go.” He headed for the door, stopping briefly to kiss her on the mouth. “See you tonight.”
He left the room.
But he left behind a very worrying silence.