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The MC on stage urged everyone to sit down. Weaving through the chatty networking crowd, it took us quite some time to get to our seats. Everyone stopped Kyle to take selfies with him, throw their business cards at him, grill him, and congratulate him on being the keynote tonight. With polite words Kyle nodded, shook hands and moved us along.
We were seated at a table with an Illinois senator and his wife, the Chicago mayor, the President of Proto-Smash and John Bertrand, who Kyle introduced as one of BirdsEye’s key board members.
An old, short and stocky man with a droopy face, John seemed to be taken by me and kept congratulating Kyle on our relationship. When I asked Kyle about the congratulations, he just smiled and told me to look at the stage.
The event began with a weird and wonderful Cirque de Soliel dance spectacle with techno music, psychedelic lights and holographic displays. Perfect for the theme, Click and Electrify. Synchronized dancers skipped across the stage, stilt walkers ambled around tables, and trapeze artists and dancers swung all over the room. The performers carried vintage Polaroid cameras and took photographs with the guests and handed them the results.
I was awed and delighted but the hardboiled cynics, Kyle and John, talked throughout the performance. Kyle only looked up and briefly smiled when one of the stilt walkers came to our table and handed me a hot pink Asiatic lily. When he tried to take a selfie with the three of us, Kyle did not look up. Then the stilt walker pantomimed at Kyle reproachfully for ignoring the show. Kyle shot him a wry look and went right back to speaking softly with John.
Sometimes, I wanted to smack Kyle’s face, with a fish, for his jaded detachment. I recalled what he had told me in San Francisco the first time I had visited. Seen it all, done it all, can’t remember most of it. I’ve been to so many places I’ve lost count. I don’t get excited anymore. My heart beats for nothing. I guess I am dead inside.
I guessed some part of him was still dead inside.
After a few presentations and speeches by Proto-Smash executives, dinner was served. After dinner was Kyle’s keynote speech. During dinner, he glanced at his phone to go over the speech his publicity director had written. I smiled. Kyle had ignored all of her emails till now. But I knew he was going to be brilliant.
I tapped his arm and whispered, “You’re going to wow them.”
He shrugged. “Not so much. This crowd is used to the tip of the spear. The best of the best.”
“And that’s why they picked you as keynote speaker.”
“Thanks, babe. Have I told you how lovely you are tonight?” he asked, his lips daring and bold on my ear lobe.
“Only a million times. So what’s the schedule like?” I picked up the program placard. “When do we get out of here? I’d like to go up to the room and kiss the keynote.”
“Way more than a kiss or we’re not leaving.” A flash of his teeth dazzled me and he explained after his speech was the award ceremony and then we were free to go. “Though my prize is sitting with me.”
“Kyle, what you said at Alvina’s was perfect. End it on a high note since you suck at pretty speeches.” I’d never forget Kyle had called me the love of his life.
“Idiot.”
“Jerk.”
We smiled affectionately at each other.
My phone rang again and I looked down. It was Cypress. “Hey, I’ve got to take this.”
A shadow crossed his face. “Juniper, I want your hiney on that seat when I am talking. Okay? Be back in a flash. Dinner ends in sixteen minutes and eleven seconds. My speech starts in twenty-two minutes.”
“Of course, darling. I wouldn’t miss your speech for the world.” I dropped a tiny kiss on his cool cheek and as I got up, his attention switched from me to John.
I walked out of the ballroom and felt a trickle of cold down my spine. I looked around and my eyes met frosty violets. Denise.
Oh joy.
She was sitting a few tables from us. Why the hell had I not noticed her before? What was she doing here? Shaking my head, I walked out of the noisy ballroom to the hall and leaned against a pillar and talked to Cypress. He and Sofia had plans to go bowling tonight and I was over the moon at the excitement in his voice. She was driving and they were en route to downtown Detroit. When he hung up, I walked back into the ballroom, my head spinning with happiness for my twin.
Hurry. Kyle’s speech starts in seventeen minutes!
Shaking my head, I smiled. How had I become more time conscious and Kyle less punctual as our relationship had evolved? Just as I got to the ballroom entrance, someone rammed into me and liquid trickled down my bodice. My nose hit a taut bare shoulder and I felt tears rush to my eyes at the pain. Blinking, I made out it was Denise.
“Oops,” she said, her hands going to my dress and swiping my chest. “Oh no. I’m so sorry.”
What a beyotch.
I got the distinct feeling she had done this on purpose. I looked past her shoulder to the dark room and made out that dessert was being cleared. Dinner would soon be over and Kyle would be up next.
“Champagne rosé stains. You’d better wipe that, honey. Again, so sorry.”
I looked down at the dark stains slithering down my peacock blue dress. I frowned. No way could I go back in like this. Without a word to her, I swiveled and walked to the ladies room past the hallway. I was not surprised when I heard the clickety clack of heels behind me. I turned around.
“What is it, Denise? First you spill a drink on me and now you’re stalking me. Is there a cure for you?”
“Juniper, I need to talk to you.”
I don’t know why her ordinary words were like an occult chant to my ears. She frightened me. When she came up to me I circled her and resumed walking.
“Absolutely not. Seriously, get a life.”
By some miracle, she stopped following me as I stomped away. I groaned when I saw the long line outside the bathroom. It stretched the entire length of the hall. There was no time to go upstairs to our penthouse. I considered the men’s bathroom where I saw no line. Then I remembered a smaller bathroom by the elevators. Frustrated, I picked up my skirts and ran to this small, but thankfully vacant, ladies room. I threw my phone down on the polished slate vanity and groaned when a text popped up from Kyle:
come back babe...where r u?
Leaning over the marble sink top, I grabbed a bunch of paper napkins and started to sponge away the pink liquid Denise had spilled on me.
Oh God. Hurry. Hurry. Fourteen minutes to Kyle’s speech.
All of a sudden, the door opened and Denise strode in, her posture queenly and eyes resolute. “I need to talk to you.”
“And I don’t want to listen to you. What part of that do you not understand?”
“You are making a mistake.”
“Pee and leave, Denise.” I threw down the paper napkins and wet a fresh bunch. Now to wet clean. Then dry. And run like the wind from the Queen of Psychos.
“Juniper, you have this wonky opinion of me. Maybe from Kyle. I want you to give the real me a chance.”
“Denise. Please stop talking.”
She came behind me and I glanced in the mirror. I stiffened. Despite my anxiety, I was drawn to her. There was something lethal yet magnetic and alluring about her. I reinstated my initial reaction to her...she was indeed a deadly Siren.
Her violet eyes gleamed like amethysts in the low light and a tremulous smile lingered on her ruby lips. She wore a stunning scarlet dress with a sweeping mermaid train and delicate gold tips on the edges of the gown where it scooped to her low décolleté. On anyone else, a blood red dress would have looked gaudy and costumey, but Denise carried it better than Princess Grace of Monaco would have.
How can someone so beautiful be so ugly?
“I hate it when someone gets the wrong opinion of me. Breaks my heart.”
I shut my eyes to block out her image. “I find that hard to believe.”
“It’s true,” she said. “I am sadly misunderstood. I’ve always been misunderstood...mainly by the Paxtons.”
“Wow. Spinning. Such a spinner. You’re so good at that.”
“I’m here to tell you something about Kyle.”
“Good luck with that.” I was almost done cleaning my dress. Now to dry it.
“You have no idea who the real Kyle is.”
“If you think I’ll believe your lies, you’re ten levels of delusional.”
“You don’t have to believe me. But your ignorance doesn’t change the truth. Kyle is a dangerous man. If you doubt me, I have proof.”
I put my palms childishly over my ears. “Lalalala. I don’t hear anything. If you don’t leave, I’m going to—”
“What? Call 9-1-1?”
“No. Run past you. Hope the toilet overflows and sweeps you away.”
She sighed and pressed her tall scarlet form against the door, her small and perky cleavage thrusting forward in the confined bodice. “Juniper. Please. This is not a ploy to destroy Kyle. This is what Royce asked me to do. I know you’re serious about Kyle. But there’s no way a girl could be serious about Kyle if she knew the truth.”
“What do you mean?” Curious for the first time, I stopped rubbing my dress and looked at her.
“I’ll explain.” There was no malice in her eyes. No ill intent. Just plain concern and a marked fatigue, as though she was weary of fighting life. “Please, give me five minutes.”
Eleven minutes to Kyle’s speech.
I glanced at my phone. “Three minutes tops and then I’m leaving. If I find out you’re lying, the consequences will not be good.”
“On Christmas, you said something about female solidarity. That’s why I have to speak out. You think we are enemies. I don’t. I see a girl stuck in a situation beyond her control. Like I was when I first met Kyle.”
“Okay?”
“Juniper, you are my replacement as Kyle’s Summer.”
“What? What the hell are you talking about?” I laughed as I washed my hands. “Okay. I thought you were serious, but you’re still on the train to Cuckoo Town.”
“Kyle asked me to be his Summer. But I wasn’t available anymore, so he found you.”
My blood froze and I tried to process what she meant. I finally whispered, “It can’t be.”
“It is.”
“You were supposed to be with Kyle during the time I am his?”
She nodded. “Yes. You are my replacement.”
“Not...possible.”
“I can email you the contract if you need proof.”
Twisting my fingers behind my back, I blanched. “Um. No.”
“Why are you so shocked by this? Aren’t you his Summer?”
“No. I am his girlfriend.”
“Until July?” She smirked. “He said he wanted me to be his fuck-buddy from January to July of this very year. So I know you are my replacement.”
I avoided her gloating violet eyes. Hands trembling, I turned on the hot water.
“Three years ago, Kyle and I met on a flight from Chicago to Ann Arbor. Our dads used to be friends long ago and we were childhood friends. As adults we felt an instant attraction.”
Feeling dizzy, I clenched my belly. Kyle had some explaining to do.
He hated her.
Seemed to hate...
Was it all an act?
“You are lying.”
“No, I’m not. Kyle was in town for Thanksgiving and I was visiting for a news story. At that time, I worked with Chicago Channel three. He asked me out and we met at the Chrome Fig. He told me he was very attracted to me. And that he wanted me.”
I shivered. This was all too familiar. In fact, it was exactly the way Kyle had asked me to be his. By now, the water in the sink was scalding hot. I closed my eyes and let my hands burn.
Denise was still talking. “I was flattered. I mean who can resist him? He is a god among men. I said I’d love to date him. He told me he doesn’t date and explained his system. Made me sign an NDA. He said I’d have to wait because he was all booked up for years. Three years.”
I gasped. “Three years? He did not say that. Bullcrap.”
“I was as mystified as you. From what he said, he sets them ahead of time. Way ahead. At that time, he was with this actress, Mona Atkins. And he was set up for three years—all the way to Izzy. I thought it’d be fun. So he emailed the contract and I signed it.”
“No.”
This is not happening.
I have hurt my head and am having a bad dream.
Save me, Kyle. I am lying on the cold marble floor.
Wake up, Juniper.
“Yes. I was once as carried away by Kyle as you are now.”
No. No. No. Not Kyle and Denise.
“Can’t be. Can’t be.”
“It is,” she said quietly. “You have always known, haven’t you? It’s the sick feeling you get when something is not quite right and you still go along for the ride. And the truth of it claws at you day after day.”
“Stop telling me what I feel. Please.”
Though I shook my head—deep inside, I agreed with her. It was a sick feeling I had had all along I could not shake. By his own admission, Kyle said he was a psycho. Kyle liked controlling others.
Dread pooled in my belly.
Was he just playing with me?
Am I just a toy?
Did he know exactly how to play with me?
Like a puppet master, Kyle strung us all like props on strings. Maybe, he watched from the sidelines as everyone poured gasoline on themselves, lit matches and burned alive.
Maybe, he was dead inside and enjoyed the smell of burnt flesh.
Stop it, Juniper. She’s getting to you.
“That’s what it’s like with Kyle, isn’t it? On the surface, he is terrific. Glorious hot perfection. But inside he is a polluted sicko.”
“Denise, just the facts, skip the opinion.” The water was now liquid fire and I let it burn my hands.
That was a small pain. Inside was the big one.
“Well. Kyle said in return for my...services...I could have whatever I desired. Money. Jewels. Job. Investment in my ventures. I told him I hated working at Channel Three. Too many politics. I had interviewed Royce for the network and asked Kyle if he needed a campaign manager. Royce barely remembered me from when I was a kid. Kyle introduced me to Royce and I was hired. Over time, Royce’s marriage fell apart. When his wife left, we started dating. Royce filed for divorce because Min-Jun lived with Kyle at his house.”
“Kyle and Min-Jun are just friends.” My voice was a dry rasp.
My body ached as if tiny pins spun in my blood.
I hurt. Bad.
“Don’t be naïve. When he was younger, Kyle used to visit Royce in DC. He’d always joke Min-Jun was the only good woman in the world and too bad Royce found her first.”
I knew I should have run for the hills, ears covered and shouting lalalala. But my dammed trust issues beat up my logic, smacked it to the furthest recess of my brain and took over.
“Why are you telling me this?”
“I love Royce. I want the best for his family. I’ve always had a tender, self-sacrificing personality to the point of martyrdom. I’ll even allow people to hate me just so they can thrive.”
I mentally rolled my eyes. “Good for you.
“Goodness, you’ll burn off your hands.” She stepped forward to shut off the water.
“I’m fine.” I nudged her away. The water was so hot now, I felt boneless with pain.
Shrugging, she watched me with a soft smile.
“So then?”
“Royce was furious that Kyle had ruined his marriage. Two brothers became enemies. And I got stuck in the blender of their hatred. When Kyle found out about Royce and me, he called me. Yelled like a psycho. Then he flew over just to mentally and verbally abuse me in person.”
I gasped. “I know Kyle. I highly doubt that.”
“That’s because you don’t know the real Kyle. The one who has no control. You should see him when he’s drunk.”
My phone kept buzzing. I looked at the screen. Kyle was calling me. Nonstop.
With a twinge of agony, I released my hands from Hell’s sink. My fingers looked like spicy shrimp and felt worse as I turned the tap off.
“Excuse me, but I know Kyle more than anyone else in the world. I’m listening because I have no choice. This is not going to change anything.”
She paled. I guess she thought I had crossed over to the Dark Side. “Kyle went to juvie for threatening his mother with a knife. Did you know that?”
She sounded desperate now. Desperate to convince me.
“He might have told me.”
I recalled Kyle had said he once tried to burn the house down. Had he really pulled a knife on his mother? I gulped and looked down at the Celtic bracelet engraved with my name. I choked back the ash I felt on my tongue, the embers of fears crawling from my throat to my mouth.
The man I have come to know cannot be the man she knows.
Kyle is not violent.
He would not cheat on his own brother with Min-Jun.
Stay strong, Juniper. Remember Kyle has enemies.
She smiled at her reflection in the mirror and reapplied her lipstick. That moment in time was my mistake. I should have run away and gone back to Kyle. Instead, I watched her, fascinated. Her lips got bloodier, like the rage in my eyes.
“Look, he threatened me. Said if I didn’t leave Royce he’d destroy me. Destroy my reputation. He would never let me be happy with Royce. It didn’t matter if I was with his brother.”
How can a man do that to his own brother?
“Kyle said my contract was binding. I could not get out.”
“When was this?” I asked.
“End of summer.”
So August. Two months before he met me.
“One day, I was miserable and told Royce everything. He went nuts. Royce hired excellent lawyers who helped overturn the stupid contract. It was hell.”
“That is your version of the story.”
“It’s the truth. What are you going to do with it?”
“I am going to talk to Kyle.”
Her eyes grew wild as she stroked the black waves of her hair spilling down one shoulder. At the back of my mind, I noticed she wore long and lush extensions.
“Sweetheart. He’s a brilliant liar. He’ll twist my words and make me the liar. Kyle is dangerous. You have no idea what he’s capable of.”
“I am—I don’t—.” I halted.
I had nothing.
I just knew I was going to lose Kyle. So twisted were my fears of losing him, her “truth” was instant mental poison, polluting the memory of all we had. The past two months, I had been living with the delusion Kyle and I were a couple and nothing could tear us apart.
“Yes, he may seem exciting and fun and loaded and sexy as hell. But there is no future with Kyle. He may say he loves you. But remember: he lies to get what he wants from people. It helps him control them. Don’t think you are his one and only. Or his last.” Pearl white teeth nipped her tongue wickedly between them, as if she was gloating. “After all, he is all set up with Winters and Summers for the next few years.”
My attention perked up. “Wait. What? When you met him, right? Past, right? Not now. Not...the...future.”
“Yes. The next two or three years—from now. Maybe even the next five years.”
I reeled back. Like she’d punched my nose and broke it. Tears filled my eyes and I looked at the elegant tin ceiling. Wheezing for air, I hoped I wouldn’t have an asthma attack.
“There are girls...who are set up to follow me?”
“When Royce hired lawyers to break the contract, we found out about the other girls. The future ones. The ones who were to come after me.”
After me!
“Are...you sure?”
“Yes. After he’s done with you, Kyle has a Winter who is a Brazilian model. Next year, his Summer is a British lord’s daughter in London. Then he’s got a gal from Switzerland. Gosh, the Swiss girl is ridiculously hot. You know what he likes. Gorgeous, brainless bimbos. Just bodies to bang.” She gave me an assessing look. “Well, usually.”
I felt nauseous. Sick. As if I had guzzled down a tank of gasoline.
“That’s not how it works. Doesn’t he find them at the end? Like me?”
“Well, I was no longer available, and he found someone quick. Kyle is on some kind of inner clock. He is a sociopath. He finds girls. Waits around for years. Enjoys his present with another girl. The wait is more exciting than the hunt.”
No! It can’t be.
With dread, I knew Kyle and I were over. I didn’t want us to be over. Dread kept pooling in my belly, and it was a slow burn—an existential kind of dread. The one linked with finality.
What will I do without him?
A fresh wave of pain hit me. I heard the gushing water. I saw the light in one of the stalls flickering. I felt the sheen of the cold slate as I steadied myself on the vanity. I made out the gleam of the black chrome fixtures. But I was not here. I was in a dark space. Confined and trapped. All I could hear were flies. Flies buzzing all around me.
Denise was still talking but I saw the black hole of her mouth lined with blood red. I heard no words. A few long moments later, her voice became audible. “Oh honey. Don’t be sad.” She was peering at me with concern in her eerie violet eyes. “There are so many better men out there.”
For me, there is only Kyle
I could not take it anymore.
“Alright,” I choked out. “I...appreciate you telling me.”
“I am so in love with Royce. I want others to be as happy as I am. I lucked out. I got the only Paxton who isn’t a commitment-phobe. Kyle and his brothers just use and abuse women. Like father, like sons. They’re notorious for that. You should know that, sugar,” she said with a gentle smile.
Three minutes to Kyle’s speech.
“I’m gonna go now.” I clenched my phone and walked to the door.
She squeezed between me and the door so fast, I was stunned. That woman had sneaky ninja reflexes.
“My intention was not to cause you pain. I have nothing but the upmost respect for you. You are a kind, lovely little thing. Before you talk to Kyle, think about why I told you this. If you think it’s because of anger or resentment, no no no,” Denise said, talking fast like a voice synthesizer. “Kyle made it his life’s mission to destroy me. That’s what he does. Not me. He recently fired Sylvia from his company—the very person who founded it with him. Without a reason. He uses people. When he needed money for his company Royce gave it to him. Now Royce needs political contributions, and Kyle has turned against him.”
“Enough.” Tears jabbed my eyes and I focused on the floor. “I’ve heard enough. Let me go, Denise.”
“One more thing...” She stood blocking the exit door and crossed her bare ivory arms behind her back, fingers clawing the handle. “All the girls with Kyle are survivors. Like cockroaches. Not you. You’re a moth. With fragile wings.”
“Excuse me.” My hands still hurt as I reached for the door.
“I have serious doubts about you. I don’t want you to end up like Chloe.”
“What? You think I’m going to commit suicide?” I began to laugh. “You’re crazy. I’m not emotional. I will walk away with zero fucks.”
I locked eyes with her, defiant in my white lies.
“I think you bluff. I know girls like you. You’re sweet and smart. You’re also soft. You have a career but secretly long for a man to come along. To destroy your nightmares and live your daydreams.”
“Shut it, Denise. You know nothing about me. Move away from the door.”
“You know why I mention Chloe?”
I tried to shove her off, but she was mega strong. “Move away.”
“Kyle told you she committed suicide?”
“Yes, he did.”
“I’m sure he never told you how. And why.”
“Stop wasting my time. Let me go!”
I pulled the door with my burnt hands and it opened for a second before jerking her back. She laughed and her body vibrated as she slammed it.
“God, you’re insane,” I barked, glaring at her.
“Kyle destroyed Chloe. Her family, her friends all blame Kyle for her death. In fact, when he came to the funeral they threw him out. Her death was all over the news.”
Adrenaline kicked in and I grabbed the black chrome handle and pulled the door with all my might. It opened partly and she slammed her entire weight on it and it shut with a thud.
“Are you crazy? Get away from the door.”
“Did you know Chloe committed suicide by jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge?” she asked.
Her final words were like a knife in my ear.
Time stopped.
I had the misfortune of visualizing most things.
And I saw the beautiful girl I had seen in the old photographs with Kyle in her lace and leather with her short blonde hair and her spunky green eyes falling falling falling from the red Golden Gate Bridge to the rocky water below. Her body smashed to bloody bits, twitching and shaking in mortal pain before breathing her last. I shivered.
Did it hurt when your soul was torn from your body?
“No,” I whispered, involuntarily.
“Look, I don’t want you to end up like Chloe. Maybe you won’t if you’re with him for a few months. But God knows what years with Kyle will do.”
I choked back a sob. My eyes were vacant, and I felt empty. With one final yank, the door opened and out I ran. I think I heard her voice in the gust of the door closing with a woosh.
I could never be sure if she said, “Fly, little bird. Fly.”
I had never felt so lost in my life.
I stumbled out with a singular thought uniting my body and mind.
Run!
