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“Are you excited to come back to work?”
I glanced at Delaney. “Girl, you are crazy to think that I am excited to come back to work. If I was going up to peds, I would be excited, but I have one more week I need to be in the ER. Besides, I still have three more days ‘til I’m back.”
It was Friday afternoon, and I was sitting on Roc’s front porch with Delaney. The race crew was in Nevada for the weekend so Delaney and Harlyn came over for dinner and to watch qualifying.
“So, when you go back to work, are you going to still stay here?” Delaney asked.
I nodded. “Yep. I told Roc I would hang around until he was back on his feet.”
“And what about when he’s back on his feet?” Harlyn tipped her wine glass toward me. “My dad likes you.”
My gaze moved to the driveway where my car had sat for the past two weeks. “He likes that I’m helping him get around, Harlyn. His strength is finally coming back, and he’s not falling asleep at the drop of a hat. Soon, he’s not going to need me for anything.”
I wasn’t going to mention anything about Roc and me. It had been an amazing few days, but we hadn’t discussed anything about the future.
Roc and I had a good system with how we got him around, but each day Roc was figuring out how to do most things by himself. Monday, we were supposed to go to the doctor and hopefully find out when he would be starting physical therapy. Roc was chomping at the bit to really get back to work.
The past week, we were at the garage every day, and on Wednesday, we had gone to the local track to test out the car. Roc was back to work; the only thing he wasn’t doing was going to the races.
I had never been that close to a drag car before, and it was an experience I would never forget. The ground had rumbled beneath my feet when Brooks had fired it up, and I thanked God for the earmuffs Roc had given me.
Even now, two days after we had been at the track, I could remember exactly how it felt and the smells in the air.
Harlyn laughed and combed her fingers through her hair. “I’ve seen the way he looks at you, Mave. My dad has the hots for you.”
“I think maybe we should cut Harlyn off already,” I mumbled.
Roc wasn’t hiding the fact that we were kissing and getting to know each other very well. I knew the looks she was talking about. They were smoldering ones that gave me goosebumps and made me yearn for his kisses.
Delaney snickered. “She might be right, Mave. I haven’t been around you and Roc a whole lot, but Jay mentioned earlier this week that Roc seemed to be mellowed out a bit.”
“Not sure what that has to do with me.”
I hadn’t known Roc before the accident, but I didn’t think he had really changed much since I had been staying with him. He still said whatever was on his mind, and all he thought about was racing.
Harlyn leaned toward Delaney with a smirk on her lips. “She’s too close to what is going on to see it.”
“Oh, you are so right about that,” Delaney agreed.
I looked back and forth between the two. “I’m not sure I like you two ganging up against me.”
“We’re not against you, Mave. We’re actually for you and Roc getting together.” Harlyn high fived Delaney. “You’re exactly what my dad needs.”
I shook my head. “Your dad and I aren’t together, Harlyn.” Were we?
“Uh, yeah you are,” she insisted.
“I don’t even know why we’re talking about this. I’m just helping Roc get back on his feet. That’s all.” I needed to have this discussion with Roc before I had it with Delaney and Harlyn.
“Okay, okay.” Harlyn glanced over at Delaney with a smirk on her lips. “Maybe we’re seeing something that isn’t there.”
“You’re right.”
Were they? Lord have mercy, this was confusing as hell. There was something going on, but I didn’t know what would happen after I went back to work and Roc got back on his feet. I wanted it to, but I wasn’t sure what Roc wanted.
“Yep,” Delaney laughed. “I guess there isn’t anything going on if Mave can’t see it.”
Harlyn held out her hand in front of her and inspected her nails. “I think there was a woman he was seeing before the accident. I’m sure he’s still talking to her.” Her eyes darted to Delaney with a sly smile on her lips.
She was trying to get a rise out of me, but I knew I needed to keep my cool. Though what she had said bugged me. Say what? Roc was interested in someone else before the accident? Why on earth hadn’t he told me that?
“He hasn’t said anything about it, but good for him.”
“Right,” Harlyn drawled. “Good for him.”
I cleared my throat. “I told you I was talking to a guy, but I’ve put it on hold ‘til I get back home.”
Delaney sat forward. “You mentioned it, but you’ve been keeping this guy and the details to yourself.”
I fidgeted with my hands in my lap and crossed my legs. “We were just talking. I met him on some app. He’s really into his career right now.”
It was nothing because I hadn’t talked to him in weeks. The fact he hadn’t reached out to me either showed there wasn’t anything between the two of us.
“As are you,” Delaney pointed out. “So you told him about being here with Roc?”
That was a big, fat negative. I didn’t even know the guy’s name, and we had basically stopped messaging each other at the same time.
“Yeah, I let him know I was helping a friend. We plan on meeting up once everything goes back to normal.” So many lies that I was going to have trouble keeping straight.
“Interesting,” Harlyn hummed. “You’ll have to keep us posted on what happens.” She sipped her wine and smiled. “Sounds like things are going good.”
I nodded slightly and smiled. “Why don’t I go check on dinner?”
I had slid a pan of lasagna into the oven when Harlyn and Delaney had gotten here, and it was about time for it to be done.
“Is there anything we can do to help?” Delaney asked.
I shook my head. “Nope. I just need to pull it out of the oven and grab the salad out of the fridge. I’ll holler when it’s ready.”
Delaney and Harlyn both smiled at me. “Sounds good,” they said in unison.
I headed into the house, and my eyes connected with Roc’s as soon as I stepped through the front door.
He narrowed his gaze on me. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
I walked over to the oven and pulled down the door. “I do?”
“Pale.” He wheeled into the kitchen and stopped on the other side of the oven door. He watched me pull the lasagna and garlic bread out of the oven.
“The lasagna or the bread?”
He chuckled and shook his head. “The lasagna and bread looks amazing. I was talking about you. You sure you’re feeling okay?”
What do you care if I’m okay or not if you’re seeing someone else? Ugh. I shook my head and forced a smile. “I’m feeling great. Not sure why I’m pale.”
He eyed me knowingly but didn’t say anything more about how I looked. “Need help with anything?”
“You wanna grab the salad and dressings?”
He nodded curtly. “Can do, Doc.”
I turned off the oven and grabbed plates and forks. “I’ll tell Harlyn and Delaney it’s ready.”
Roc glanced at me. His eyes scanned me from head to toe. “You sure you’re okay? Thought maybe I could sneak some time with you before they came back in.”
I pushed out a laugh and plastered a smile on my face. “Later, Chief.”
Chipper. I need to act chipper and happy. Not like Delaney and Harlyn had just broken my heart after they told me about Roc seeing someone. I shouldn’t feel that way since there wasn’t anything going on between Roc and me.
It was just a few kisses.
Okay, a ton of kisses, but that’s all they were. I was just here all of the time and it was convenient for Roc. He was a hot-blooded man, after all.
I moved to the front door and peeked my head out. “Dinner, girls.”
Harlyn beamed up at me. “Awesome.”
There was something going on behind her eyes. I didn’t know her well enough to know what it was, but it was there.
I ducked back in the house and headed back in the kitchen to see Roc add the large bowl of salad and three different dressings.
Harlyn and Delaney came into the house, and I filled our wine glasses while they filled their plates.
I sipped my wine while I watched Roc fill his plate and roll over to the table. “You gonna eat, Doc?”
Snap out of it, Mave. I forced a smile and took a sip. “Yeah, I just wanted to make sure there was enough.”
Harlyn looked down at the pan of lasagna. “You made a full pan of lasagna. There is more than enough food left. We don’t have Remy or Jay’s appetite.”
Delaney laughed. “Yeah. I’m pretty sure Jay eats for two. Him and his inner jackass.”
Roc roared with laughter, and Harlyn nodded knowingly.
“Girl, same with Remy. I asked Meg the last time I talked to her if Remy was going through a second growth spurt. Swear to God, he is eating us out of house and home.”
“They’re just growing boys,” Delaney giggled.
“You see Meg lately?” Roc asked.
Harlyn shook her head. “Not since the barbeque.” She sat down at the opposite end of the table from Roc. “I think her and Lo were thinking of coming down the end of September but I’ve come to find out the wind could pick up and Meg could get a wild hair to come down here.”
“Dear God,” Delaney laughed. “I still remember Meg and her friend in Brooks’ pool. They really are a hoot together.”
I filled a plate with food and grabbed my wine. “Meg is Remy’s mom?” I asked.
Delaney sat next to Harlyn which left the only open seat next to Roc. Of course.
“Yeah. His mom and step-dad live about three hours from here. If you’ve never met someone who is genuinely happy, then you need to meet Meg. She can turn a funeral or pap smear into a good time.”
Roc wrinkled his nose. “Not sure either of those should be fun.”
Harlyn waved her hand at him. “You know what I mean. The woman is absolutely crazy, no matter the situation.”
“But the good kind of crazy,” Delaney pointed out.
I dug into my food while Harlyn retold the story of the time Meg and her friend Cyn had broken a huge, expensive bed.
“The woman is married to a saint. How Lo is so chill with her is beyond me,” Roc grunted.
“Come on, Dad. He loves her and knows that’s just who she is.” Harlyn set her fork down on her empty plate and sighed. “We should all be so lucky to find the Lo to our Meg.”
“Or our Harlyn to our Remy.” Delaney smiled wide. “You two are like Lo and Meg 2.0.”
Harlyn threw her head back laughing. “Oh Lord. Wait until I tell Remy that.”
Roc shook his head but kept quiet.
I ate half of my food and pushed my plate away. I sat back, listening to Harlyn and Delaney chatter endlessly.
“Doc,” Roc said softly. “You okay?”
I nodded and smiled stiffly. “Yep.”
I wasn’t. Not at all. I had been running from the idea of Roc and me being something more, but now that Harlyn had said he was seeing someone else, I realized I wasn’t really running from it as much as I thought. Deep down, I knew that I wanted something to happen, but it was over before it started, because if Roc was seeing someone else, I didn’t want to be the person to come between them.
I wasn’t going to start out dating someone knowing they were with someone else.
The other woman was not who I was.
“You need a refill?” I nodded to his half-empty glass of water.
He didn’t answer, and I looked up to see he was studying me. I didn’t want him to see what I was feeling. I didn’t want him to know that somehow, he had broken my heart without him knowing he had it already.
God, I was such a fool.
Feelings sucked because even though your head knew they were a bad idea, your heart just didn’t care.
“I can get it myself.”
I nodded stiffly. “Sounds good.” I grabbed my half-eaten plate of food and pushed my chair back. “I’m gonna get started on the dishes.”
I felt Roc’s eyes on me while I started cleaning up the kitchen.
He knew something was up.
He knew I was acting different.
He just wasn’t going to find out why, though.
I was done being a fool.
Roc Krinston was the type of man I didn’t want.
Now my heart just had to figure that out.
*
