Chapter Eight

Kitty felt trapped as William put the ring on her finger and the minister pronounced them husband and wife. She should have done as Rufe said, changed her mind while she still had time. Now it was too late. As she signed the register, Kitty realized it was the beginning of a new life. She was now Mrs. William Barron.

The reception was a quiet affair, a family dinner held in a small anteroom at Adams Hotel, where Alexander Barron insisted on them having the honeymoon suite for their wedding night and the week they would spend in Sydney before leaving for Bulahdelah. It had been a gift from him to the young couple.

“You make a charming bride, my dear.” Alexander smiled at Kitty, handing her a glass of champagne as she stood alone for a moment. “William is a lucky man. I hope he appreciates his good fortune. To your happiness, my dear.” He raised his glass and toasted her.

Kitty smiled back. Alexander had charmed her with his old-world courtesy and unfailing kindness in the time leading up to the wedding. At least she liked one of her in-laws, she thought, as she thanked him for his good wishes.

Lady Barron crossed the room to join them, rather like a battleship in full sail, with William following. “So, Kitty,” she boomed, “have you finished the purchases for your new home? I doubt you will be able to purchase anything in the way of furniture or household goods in this Bulahdelah.”

“I’ve bought what I believe we’ll need without having seen the house. If we need more, then it might mean I’ll need to make a trip to Sydney.”

“I see. It is a pity you didn’t bring furniture with you from England, the quality here must be inferior, I am sure.”

“Not really. From what I’ve seen, the quality here is quite good.”

William took over. “If we can’t find what we want here, then we shall have to wait until we make a visit to England.”

Lady Barron frowned. “William, I thought I made it quite clear that I do not expect to see you both in England. The reason I’ve allowed this marriage to take place is because you will both be living here permanently. The scandal surrounding your father’s death would prevent me from ever receiving you in Buckinghamshire, Kitty. I do not expect to see you in England. I want that firmly understood.”

The words hit Kitty like a slap in the face. For seconds she stood, dumbstruck. Then her anger flared. “My father did nothing to be ashamed of,” she retorted with vehemence. “He was ruined by an unscrupulous scoundrel, and took the only way out that he could conceive of.”

Lady Barron lifted her chin. “I do not wish to discuss the matter. As long as you remain here, it’s not a problem. I repeat, I do not expect to see you in England.”

Kitty felt her face flush. “You can be assured that I will never come to visit you, Lady Barron,” she fumed.

“Good. Then we understand each other.” She nodded dismissively and walked across the room to join her daughter.

Her husband winced. “My wife sometimes presents her point of view in a forthright manner that seems discourteous. I’m sorry she offended you.”

Kitty controlled her anger. “I’m not happy with her remarks, but she need have no worry that I will ever visit her.” She turned to William, narrowing her eyes. “Did you know about her attitude?”

William squirmed. “She had mentioned some reluctance to ask us to visit her, but I’m sure she’ll forget it in time.”

“You can be sure I will not.” Kitty spat the words out. “If I never see her again, I’ll be very happy.”

“Kitty, please…” William put out his hand.

“I don’t wish to discuss it further.” She swept away to talk to Bella, leaving William and his father alone.

****

Kitty lay in the big bed in the honeymoon suite waiting for her husband to join her. She knew she should be looking forward to this, her wedding night, but she was dreading the thought of William touching her. How different it would be if it were a man like Rufe who would be initiating her into the mysteries of love. One whose touch could excite her, whose kiss aroused feelings of passion in her.

William emerged from the bathroom and stood beside the bed. His eyes shone as he looked down at her, then he pulled the bedclothes back. He sucked in his breath. “My God, you’re beautiful. And now you belong to me.”

He stood looking down at her and she looked away, embarrassed, as his nakedness beneath his bathrobe revealed all too clearly his arousal. He climbed into bed alongside her breathing heavily, pulled her nightgown up over her head, and removed it, raking her from top to toe with his gaze.

Kitty dropped her arms, trying to cover her bareness, but he pulled them away.

“No, let me see you,” he muttered as he pressed himself hard against her. Instinctively she moved back, away from him. He pulled her to him and his mouth was on hers, his tongue inside her mouth. She hated the feeling. His hands moved over her body, kneading her breasts.

“God, you’re beautiful,” he said again, “and you’re all mine.” His hands moved down her body and forced her legs apart. He was half on top of her now. His fumbling fingers probed at her most private parts—exploring, touching, stroking. Kitty gave a little gasp as she began to feel a sensation down there, tingling, warm, and not unpleasant.

Then suddenly he was fully on top of her and forcing himself inside her. All pleasure left as she felt sudden pain. She cried out and tried to push him away but he took no notice, forcing harder, pushing, thrusting, it felt as if he was tearing her apart. On and on he went, faster, harder, oblivious to her cries, to the tears of pain that slid down her cheeks.

Then suddenly she felt him spasm, once, twice, a third time and then he shuddered and went slack on top of her. He lay there inert, panting, and then slowly lifted himself up.

“You’ll get used to it, Kitty,” he said, rolling off her. “I know well-bred ladies like you don’t like it, but you’ll get used to it.” With that, he turned on his side and in a few moments she heard him snoring.

Kitty climbed from the bed and made her way painfully to the bathroom. She ran a hot bath and soaked in it until the pain eased, then gently washed herself to remove all traces of William’s onslaught.

Putting her nightdress on, she climbed back into bed, fully expecting to lay awake for hours but, exhausted by the stresses of the day, she quickly fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.

The next morning, as soon as he woke, William turned to her again and started to fondle her breasts.

“Oh, no, not again,” she said, pushing his hands away.

“It won’t hurt so much this time, the first time is always the worst,” he told her. “This is what marriage is all about, Kitty, and you’ll soon find it won’t hurt at all.”

His hands were insistent. Kitty knew she must submit, this was what women had to endure in marriage.

Within minutes he was on top of her again. The pain was less this time, and she endured it without a sound. Afterwards, he collapsed back on his pillow and lay there watching her, getting his breath back.

A self-satisfied smile appeared on his face. “I can see we’re going to be happy together, Kitty. Yes, our life together will be very satisfactory.”

“I see. I take it that means I please you.” The sarcasm in her voice was lost on him.

“Oh, yes, immensely so. I was sure you would, and I’m pleased to say you’ve exceeded my expectations.”

Her lips set tight. “How nice for you.”

“Yes, it is. And now I find I’m hungry. Let’s dress and go down to breakfast.”

****

Their last day in Sydney was taken up with arrangements for the transport of their purchases and with farewells to William’s family. Kitty heaved a sigh of relief after the last farewells were said. It had been a strain trying to maintain polite relations with William’s mother, and she had found she had nothing in common with Anne and George. The only one of the family she had a liking for was Alexander, William’s father, and she was genuinely sorry to see him go.

The Hunter River steamer taking them north didn’t leave until late at night, so William suggested dinner at the Paris House, a smart restaurant in Phillip Street.

As they entered the restaurant, Kitty was disconcerted to see Rufe walking toward them. She’d not seen him since the day he had called on her in Neutral Bay, and she felt her heartbeat increase as she remembered their last meeting.

Rufe greeted them cordially. “Mr. and Mrs. Barron, I do believe. I must congratulate you on your marriage, I’m sure you’re looking forward to happy years ahead.”

William beamed. “Thank you, Cavanagh. We are indeed. We’re already the happiest of couples.” He turned to Kitty. “Isn’t that so, my dear?”

Kitty forced a smile. “Yes, of course.”

“I am pleased to hear you say so, Mrs. Barron. I’d hate to think it was otherwise. And will you be returning to England soon?”

“No, no, indeed.” William shook his head. “We’re staying here in Australia. I’ve bought a business here.”

Rufe raised his eyebrows, polite interest on his face. “Is that so? Here in Sydney, I presume?”

“No, in Bulahdelah. I’ve gone into the timber business.” William spoke with pride. “I’ve just completed additions to the house on my property, and we leave tonight to take up residence there. How these colonials manage to live in the cramped quarters they do, I’ll never understand, but I’ve added several rooms. Our home will be quite the largest in the area.”

“Of course, I’d expect nothing less. I have some interests myself near Stroud, which is nearby, so I travel up there occasionally. Perhaps I might have the opportunity to visit you one day.”

“My dear fellow”—William gushed—“you will be most welcome. Any time at all.”

“Thank you.” Rufe turned to Kitty. “And your mother, Mrs. Morland, will she be staying in Neutral Bay?”

Kitty met his gaze. “No, she’ll be coming with us. She and Mary are staying here for another week to complete the packing and then they’ll join us.”

“I’m sure she’ll enjoy the country, too.” He turned again to William. “Ah, the solitude of the bush, so quiet, so peaceful. Why, you can go for weeks on end without seeing anyone apart from your own workers. So different from Sydney with its hustle and bustle, its tiring social life. I’m sure you’ll find it a congenial lifestyle.”

William stiffened. “Er…yes. I’m sure we will. We’re both used to country life in England, you know.”

“Of course.” Rufe smiled silkily. “Well, it might be a little different to what you’re used to, but I’m sure that won’t worry you.”

“No, indeed. We’re looking forward to it, are we not, my dear.”

“Of course. Immensely.”

Rufe flashed her a sardonic smile. “I am pleased.” He paused. “Please pass on my best wishes to Mrs. Morland. And now I must let you continue in to your dinner. Good evening to you both.” He bowed slightly and walked away.

****

The steamer left at midnight. Kitty was asleep before they left Sydney and didn’t wake until they stopped to let passengers disembark at Newcastle early the next morning. She turned to look at William, relieved to see him still sleeping. Quietly, she slipped from the bed and dressed, anxious for her first sight of the countryside.

Dawn was breaking as she emerged on deck. The ocean was behind them now, for they had turned inland at Newcastle and were steaming up the Hunter River. Alone on deck, Kitty leaned on the rail, watching the tree-lined banks glide by. An early morning mist rose from the water. The sky gleamed pale gray, seeming to melt into the mist, and the trees on the bank looked dark and somber in the early light.

Kitty drank in the cool air as she turned over the events of the last few days in her mind. Had she made a terrible mistake in marrying William? She remembered how she had felt with Rufe’s arms around her. Could she ever feel that way with William? No. Well, it had been her own choice; now it was up to her to make the best of it.

She knew Bella was happy, for she believed Kitty was safe, now she was Mrs. William Barron. And she’s right, anyone would hesitate to accuse me now, even if they could find me. The Barrons are an important family. Her future seemed secure; Bella had no need to worry now. But at what cost?

The sky slowly tinged with pink as the sun sent its first cautious rays into the air. Suddenly it rose abruptly, anxious to start the new day, revealing the landscape below. As Kitty watched, the mist turned into feeble wisps, then dissipated in the soft breeze. The sun glinted silver on the water. The green leaves of the trees were in full view now, and she could see vines trailing and dipping into the river. A flock of pink and gray parrots flew overhead, their raucous squawks breaking the silence.

It was a new day, the beginning of a new life in a new place. Could she make a success of her marriage?