15

During the ride back to Tigerton, Amie and Tom fell into one easy conversation after another. Dinner was delicious and, at the concert, the musicians played with heart and soul, making the evening complete.

“I’ll send you Uncle Hal’s journals if you’d like.” Amie watched the filtered light from passing vehicles play across Tom’s features.

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

“Sure, just as soon as I finish reading the last one. But I have to warn you, I’m a slow reader. Might take me a good week or two.”

“No problem. Send them when you’re ready.”

“I’ve enjoyed reading them. I’ve gotten to know what kind of man my uncle was and...I’m proud to be his niece.”

“I’m glad. He was a good man.”

“I agree.” Amie also had a hunch that this business partnership was no accident; Uncle Hal hoped, prayed, and planned for it. Did he also play matchmaker?

At last Tom pulled into the Warrens’ driveway and an awkward hush filled the inside of the truck’s cab.

“I had a nice time tonight...today. All day.” Amie had to break the awkward silence.

“Yeah, me too.” He cleared his throat. “Um...I’ll walk you up to the house.”

“Thanks.” Amie opened the door and jumped down out of the pick-up.

He met her half-way around in the still and frosty night.

Amie took his arm and they walked side-by-side to the small front porch. Little flutters of nervousness welled up in Amie and she decided that endings to a first date always seemed uncomfortable. Except the one three years ago. That finale was a nightmare. But tonight, she shoved aside those horrible memories and focused on her present companion. The thought of Tom’s embrace was not at all unpleasant and the idea of his mouth lingering on hers in a sweet kiss sent shivers of excitement through her. Somehow, he’d captured her heart in a very special way.

Thanks, Uncle Hal.

They stopped by the front door. Indecision flittered across his face. He was debating whether to kiss her good-night. It felt like eons until he decided. Finally, he leaned forward. She lifted her chin and pursed her lips ever so slightly. Her eyelids drifted shut in dreamy anticipation.

“Amie...”

She blinked. “Yes?”

“I...I’m falling in love with you,” he stammered. Beneath the porch light, his face shone with a boyish innocence that seemed so lost on their generation.

“Tom, you’re so sweet.” She smiled. “But aren’t you supposed to kiss me and then tell me you’re falling in love with me?”

“I don’t need to kiss you to know how I feel.”

His expression held adoration. He meant every word. She longed to throw her arms around his neck and smother him with the unshed emotion building within her.

“But, I hope you’ll understand.” He stuck his hands into his jacket pockets. “About eight years ago, I made a decision not to kiss a woman until she was my wife. I probably sound like some dumb country hick.” He shuffled his feet with obviously nervousness. “But that conviction came from God and I can’t break my vow to Him.”

“I wouldn’t want you to violate your conscience.” Besides, given her past, Amie actually saw the wisdom in that resolution. She wished Jasper had been a stronger Christian.

Tom momentarily looked down before returning his gaze to hers. “It’s not that I don’t want to kiss you—”

“It’s all right. Really.”

“See, I’ve watched so many of my peers, Christians included, date and kiss women, only to break up and move on to someone new. Then I got to thinking that what they were doing was the same as...well, kissing somebody else’s wife because a lot those ladies wound up marrying other guys.” He paused and cleared his throat. “I made a decision to keep myself pure until marriage.”

Something deep within Amie began to wither. “I understand.” She forced the words out of her mouth. “I admire your conviction.” She was not the woman for Tom. She didn’t possess those attributes. She blinked back sudden tears, praying Tom wouldn’t notice.

“I guess I just wanted to share my heart with you on this matter.”

“I’m glad you did.” Her remark came out hurried, but in a few moments, she’d dissolve into tears. Inside, that old familiar ache of sheer and utter discouragement quickly choked any hopeful blossoming of love she might have begun to entertain.

And why was she so shocked, anyway?

She forced herself to breathe. “You’re a fine Christian man, Tom.” She opened the door to the Warrens’ house. “You made a godly decision. I pray you will never go back on it.” A flash of confusion crossed his features, but Amie didn’t bother to explain. “Good night, and thanks...”

Entering the house, she closed the door on his murmured “‘Night” and stood in the little foyer. Everything was dark and quiet, obviously, the Warrens were already sleeping. In the silence, she stood pondering the events of the last few minutes while the tears she’d been holding back streamed down her cheeks. How ironic that on the way back from Wausau tonight she’d determined to share her hurtful past, certain that Tom would be the one who’d understand. And he would, no doubt about it. But he wouldn’t want her after learning about her shameful secret. If he considered kissing “impure” what would he think of sexual abuse?

Or sin…maybe she’d sinned when she’d dressed nice for her date. Jasper and his pastor had both felt she’d been immodest in her choice of clothing. According to them, part of the blame lay at her own feet.

Amie put her face in her hands, succumbing to the urge to weep until she could no more. And once her tears had dried, she’d begin her life again. Single. Forever on her own. The curse.

Well, at least one thing was sure: she couldn’t stay here. How could she ever face Tom again? And why lead him on? Nothing could come of it.

Moving away from the front door, she crept down the hall to the little sewing room where she quietly packed her things.

 

~*~

 

Tom couldn’t believe it. The words Katie spoke seemed to misfire inside his brain. Amie? Gone?

“She must have left some time during the night,” Katie told him once worship service had ended. She opened her purse and pulled out a slip of paper. “This is what I found just before I made breakfast.”

He took the proffered note on which a simple Thank you for the memorable Christmas! Had been penned and was signed by Amie at the bottom. Looking back at Katie, Tom was speechless.

“Why don’t you come over for lunch today?”

The compassion he saw in Katie’s eyes only made him feel worse. What happened? Why did Amie take off? Had he offended her by sharing his conviction about kissing? Or was there a family emergency?

Katie set her hand on Tom’s shoulder. “We can talk about things later.”

“Thanks. Sure, I’ll do that. But I think I’ll go down stairs and give Amie a call first.”

“Good idea.” Katie’s expression seemed to mirror the confusion in his heart.

Leaving the sanctuary, Tom’s puzzlement over Amie’s swift departure mounted, although the speculation about a family emergency made some sense.

In his make-shift apartment, he picked up the extension in the kitchen area and dialed her phone number. He had limited data on his cell phone, but the church’s landline had nation-wide unlimited calling.

Disappointment sank like a weight when he got Amie’s voicemail. “Hi, Amie, it’s me,” he began, leaving a message. “Give me a call back when you can. I’m worried. Are your folks OK? Your brother and sister all right? Call me.”

Hanging up the receiver, he decided to try her parents’ home. He knew that number from memory too. But again, only a machine answered, and he chose not to leave a message.

Concern and frustration plagued him as he walked back into his bedroom/living room area. He glanced at his computer and decided to check his email. Much to his relief, Amie had left a message: Don’t worry. I got home all right. I’m sorry for leaving abruptly, Tom. It’s not you. It’s me, but I don’t want to elaborate in an email and I for sure don’t want to discuss it. You said you trust me, so trust that I’m right about this. I’m not the girl for you. From now on it’s strictly business between us.

He sat back in his chair, heartbroken. Nothing about her message made sense. They’d had a fun time last night. He’d sensed she felt the way he did, although perhaps her feelings weren’t as intense as his. After all, he’d admitted to falling in love with her.

Is that what scared her off? If his memory served him right, she’d smiled and said he was sweet.

Clicking on the reply to author button, he responded. Glad you made it back to Chicago OK, but I guess I need more of an explanation of why you suddenly decided we’re strictly business partners and nothing more. Can you at least tell me what exactly caused you to change your mind? When you’re ready to talk, you know where to find me.

Tom stared at the blinking cursor on his computer screen and debated whether to ask more but settled on one question at a time. He only hoped she’d respond. Soon.

Shutting down his computer, Tom made his way over to the Warrens’ where, after lunch and out of the girls’ earshot, he divulged the entire conversation he and Amie had on the porch last night.

“She said I was sweet,” he relayed. “I don’t get it.”

“Perhaps she’s a person who fears commitment,” Jake suggested.

Tom didn’t buy it. “She agreed to our partnership readily enough.”

“Yes, that’s true,” Katie said, looking at her husband as though he possessed the answers.

“But you know,” Tom began, “she does have a curious fear of men. I’ve seen it. She panics—at least she does until she gets to know them. But she’s not afraid of me and I don’t think I did anything last night to change her opinion.”

“Hmm...a fear of men?” Jake inhaled deeply, then stood and strolled to the coffee pot, pouring another cup. “I hate to even speculate as to what that could mean.” He returned to the table and sat down. “We’ll keep her—and you—in our prayers.”

Katie agreed, her soft brown eyes looking sad. “She’s a special young woman, Tom. The girls and I enjoyed her company. I’m so sorry she left.”

He nodded. “Me, too.”

“Maybe I could give her pastor a call tomorrow and try to get some insight from him,” Jake offered.

“Naw, don’t bother. I’d rather hear about whatever’s bothering Amie straight from her.” Tom slid his chair back from the table. He looked at Katie. “Thanks for the lunch. I don’t know what I’d do if you decided not to feed me.”

She waved a hand at him as though it were nothing.

“See you guys later.”

“Bye, Tom,” Jake called as he made his way to the front door.

On the way to his temporary home, Tom prayed, Lord Jesus, You’re gonna have to close the door with a bang and build a cement wall so high I’ll never get over if You want me to forget about Amie. But I don’t think You do. And what would I have done if Hal hadn’t taken a chance on me? Amie’s worth the wait and I’ve got the patience.

Tom walked into the church building and stepped into the sanctuary. He gaze fell on the large empty cross on the wall behind the altar. The words, TO GOD BE THE GLORY hung above the cross in gold letters. Oddly, he suddenly felt emboldened, as if God, Himself, approved his decision not to give up on Amie.

He sighed. Lord, You sure will have to give me the smarts to deal with this thing—whatever it is—because I have no idea where to even begin.