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If you’ve ever been invited to a birthday party for a girl you know from elementary school, but now you go to different middle schools and you don’t really know any of her new friends, you were probably really anxious. You may have tried to get out of it by telling your mom, “But I don’t know anybody.” And your mom probably said, “You know Meaghan and it’s her birthday and she invited you, so you’re going. Besides, it’s a chance to meet some new girls, and it’s only two hours, and anybody can do anything for two hours.”
That really didn’t make you feel any better, and you were still a nervous wreck when you got there. But when Meaghan introduced you to her new friends and told them what a great soccer player you are and that her friend Carrie also played soccer, that gave you and Carrie something to talk about, and eventually you found out that Carrie also runs track in the spring and so does Laura. Before you knew it two hours had flown by, you had a great time, and you and Carrie had exchanged phone numbers.
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Introductions are a way to help people feel included and as if they matter to you, so it is important to know how to properly make them.
If you are with one friend and run into another friend and you are all on your way somewhere else, it’s enough to say, “Liza, this is Carrie. Carrie, this is Liza. We’re going to a movie. Talk to you soon!” If you are all at the same party or event, you can add a bit more. “Liza, this is Meaghan. She and I went to Grassland Elementary together, but now she goes to Highlands Middle. Meaghan, Liza is on the soccer team with me at school.”
If you are with your parents, you say, “Mom and Dad, this is Carrie. We met at Meaghan’s party and she runs track for Highlands Middle.” You do not need to add, “Carrie, these are my parents.” That is pretty obvious.
If you are with your mother, and you run into your soccer coach at the post office, you say, “Mom, this is Coach Howe. She is my soccer coach.” Your mom will probably already know that if she has been going to your games, but it never hurts to refresh someone’s memory, especially when it comes to names.
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YOU DO
Include something personal about a friend you are introducing to your parents, like “Mom, this is Olga. She moved here from Germany last year.”
YOU DON’T
Just say, “Mom, this is Olga.”
Why
Because knowing a little something about your friend gives your parents an opening to get to know your friend a little better, which is reassuring for parents.
YOU DO
Introduce a newcomer to a group of people she doesn’t know, even if you don’t know everyone’s name in the group. You can simply say, “Everyone, this is Carrie. We went to elementary school together.”
YOU DON’T
Say hello to the newcomer, then resume your conversation with your other friends.
Why
Not being introduced makes a person feel invisible and unimportant, and no one wants to make anyone feel that way.
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A lady always introduces the younger person to the older person. “Grandma, this is Elizabeth.” Not, “Elizabeth, this is my grandmother.”
A lady can introduce herself to someone by saying her own name first. “Hello, I’m Jana Jones.” Ideally, the other person will reply, “Hello, I’m Hannah Rogers.”