A lot of things stay unused because they are reserved for guests, or for going out, or because they form part of a set. But don’t you think it’s a waste to have something that you don’t use?
Books, magazines, CDs, tableware, clothes, etc.
Once you start creating special categories, you often end up just “having” things and never using them. The following scenarios will be familiar to everyone.
I’ve loved Yasutaka Tsutsui’s books ever since I was a student. Most of these hardbacks are first editions. I always buy the paperbacks too—for the commentaries. Then there was a complete works edition so I had to get that. He takes up the whole shelf. But it was his earlier works I liked best—some of the recent ones I haven’t read at all. This one—I’ve never even opened it. I’ll probably never read it. But I’ll keep it. It’s part of the set.
Mom, I’ve brought a cake. Let’s have some tea. Oh—you’ve bought a new tea service. Very nice! Let’s use it. What? You don’t want to? Just for guests? So what shall we use, then? What about these? The previous ones you had for guests. You don’t want to use those either? They’re just for your friends. OK. So we’ll have to use the ones we’ve always used. Look, this one’s cracked. Oh, Mom!
These CDs are piling up. Perhaps I could sell some. World Music—that was popular. But I never listen to it now. I could sell all of those. Here’s one by Queen. I used to like it. I don’t think I’ll sell it. All these by The Doors! I bought all their albums, but I only ever listened to these two. I could sell the rest. But then they’re a set, so it’d be a pity. I think I’ll hang on to them all.
You’re going to a friend’s house today, aren’t you? What are you going to wear? Your red sweater with ribbons? No, you can’t! That’s for best. What about your strawberry one? No? You prefer the checked one? No, you can’t wear that either. You’ve only worn it once. Keep it for New Year.
Dividing things up on the basis of use means earmarking some items as special. Once that happens, the “special” items never get touched. Your treasure remains unused. Let’s consider the mentality of keeping “sets” and having things “only for guests.”
Wanting a “set” belongs to the collection mentality. A set gives a sense of perfection or beauty. I’m told that those who collect insects tend to focus on a particular species because not many people collect them or because they feel they can obtain specimens of every type. In the same way, if there’s a set of fifteen books and you have fourteen, it seems a shame not to have the other one. This is only natural.
But once you have them all, there’s not often much advantage beyond being able to say you’ve got them. If you begin to feel this matters, then you’re venturing into the realm of the genuine collector. When you find yourself obsessed with completing a set, then you may be a lost cause.
The “set” mentality can easily take hold for items like the works of a particular author or back-issues of a magazine. You end up with a choice of either keeping them all as a set or getting rid of them all.
The idea that things are more valuable as a “set” is a dangerous one. You may be told by an expert that your plates were originally a five-piece set and, as such, would fetch a higher price. If you take that too seriously, you’ll be under the spell of “sets.”
And the “for-guests” mentality is similar. The fact that people use “sets” for guests reflects the idea that “sets” are special. If teacups from a six-piece “guest” set get broken and you only have four left, then they may well be stripped of their special “guest” rank.
If you have it, use it. If you don’t use it, don’t have it.
Why should things be in sets? If you want to read a particular book, that book is all you need. If you’re not going to read the whole set, why keep it? A complete set of books can look good, of course. But who besides you is ever going to look at your bookshelves?
Why bother to keep a “guest” tea set for your friends? If you have cups you like, then use them all the time. Enjoy them yourself. Instead of having five for guests and five for ordinary use, just get five that appeal to you. It’s cheaper and takes up less space. If you break one, you can always buy another.
Rather than acquiring sets, simply buy things when necessary. They’ll come to feel like a set in due course. It’s a more relaxed approach.
And don’t bother to keep certain clothes for special use either. There’s not much difference these days between everyday clothes and “special” clothes, anyway. It’s a waste to keep something as special and only ever wear it once.