‘So why are we all here?’ The counsellor was an older woman, her hair white, loose on her shoulders. Karl always thought it looked a little thin but even thinner today. Godfrey was optimism display to the max.
‘I think we need to all just check in with each other properly.’
Rebecca looked at him. For real? Now you want to check in? She turned away. Karl sat in the middle, couldn’t move without taking sides.
‘When was the last time you did? I mean, like this, the three of you,’ the counsellor continued. Godfrey wasn’t usually part of the package deal. Not in her office.
Rebecca looked at Godfrey. Karl looked ahead. Counsellor looked at all of them, rotating.
‘A while back. We used to …’ He looked at Rebecca. Pleading.
Rebecca opened the door. Metaphorically speaking. Briefly.
‘I’m angry. Very. It’s not just about how dangerous and irresponsible this all was. Not just that you lied but that both of you thought I wouldn’t understand. And that I’m no longer part of it. Of anything that has to do with you, Karl.’
Karl turned to her. ‘It’s not even like that.’
‘Everyone knew. Except me. I call you and you pretend you are somewhere in the countryside. The English countryside.’
They were all silent. There was nothing to say. But the white-haired woman thought differently.
‘And why is that, you think? Rebecca, do you want to start?’
‘Actually, I don’t. I would like to hear from Godfrey. I would like to know what made this OK.’ She leaned towards him. ‘How did this work in your mind? I did not give up guardianship. I invited you in to support us.’
Godfrey’s body folded, smaller now.
‘I know. It just sort of ran away … sort of all went its own way, you know. It made sense, although it didn’t, if you know what I mean … I don’t even know how to explain it.’
‘Try.’
The counsellor still rotated her friendly face. Karl still looked ahead. This wasn’t about Godfrey. Not really. He was just getting it because he should have known better.
‘I would’ve gone anyway, Mum. I would’ve. I needed to see my father, Nigeria. See something other than this bloody city.’
‘You won’t be able to get rid of me—’
‘How could I want to get rid of you? Never. But you kept that from me. My whole life! I wanted to be myself. Karl. Without the bloody street telling me otherwise.’