Getting Connected
There are many ways in which we might feel the presence of a loved one or a spiritual presence; it might be through sight, sounds, a feeling, a song, a scent, or dreams. Once we can pinpoint our best way of connecting with the energies around us, it opens up an avenue for deeper study of our communication abilities and styles.
The Four Clairs
It is important that we learn the best ways that we are able to communicate with the spirit realm, and our exploration of the four clairs in this chapter will show you how to tap in and find out yours. Gaining an understanding into these areas and how you best relate can very much improve the way that you work with energy. Once you realize how you are able to receive messages most clearly, you can begin to work within that specific skill to hone your spirit game, which will in turn help you as you work with your team more effectively. As you read through the following sections, try not to get attached to a specific clair; none of us get to choose the way we connect. Instead, sit with each and find out how it happens for you. For example, a lot of people out there want to be able to see spirit; after all, seeing is believing. But when some people discover they do not have that gift, they decide that they don’t have any gifts at all. If this is the case for you, don’t despair—your gift might be in clear knowing (clairsentience), not clear seeing (clairvoyance). And even if your gift is clear seeing, maybe you’ve kept it hidden because people might think you are crazy. Go through these gifts and then sit with each of them. Whichever one makes you go back to reread is likely your strongest one. Learn about the ways in which you are able to perceive messages. Clear your mind of preconceived notions. Once you get situated and comfortable with the avenue of your gifts, let it become your starting point for communication.
1. Clairaudience: Clear listening, or the ability to hear sounds others may not be able to hear. You can hear Spirit whispering in your ear. Sometimes we hear things and turn around. We wonder who was speaking to us, only to find no one there. People with this gift need to keep their ears open and know that they are not crazy. I personally am extremely clairaudient; in most cases, messages come to me in the form of music. I hear different songs when I’m with different people, more so if my hands are on them. I will literally hear words to a song that is describing where someone is in their current space. As we work together, the songs change (almost like the dial on a radio being turned) and I hear different sounds or lyrics. I remember an interview with Sting one time where he reported that whenever he met people, he could hear different instruments in his head. It was how he identified people’s energy and received an impression of them.
2. Clairvoyance: Clear vision, or the ability to actually see Spirit. Many people who can see Spirit speak of being able to see it in their mind’s eye rather than the spirit actually standing in front of them (although some highly advanced people can see them in this manner). Children are naturally clairvoyant—have you ever seen a child look around a room and wonder what they see? They see angels and guides everywhere. Unlike us, they don’t know that it’s not “normal,” To them, it is completely natural—as it should be (until we take it away from them)!
3. Claircognizance: The ability of clear knowing, or to “just know” things without asking why. I believe mothers are very good at this, mostly with their children, but anyone could just as easily have this ability with their Spirit Team. If you know something in your gut, trust it. Personally, I always try to trust my gut, but getting there took a really long time and a lot of concentrated effort.
4. Clairsentience: Clear feeling. People who have this ability are generally referred to as empaths, as they can sense energies. Clairsentient people can hold an object and sense the energy, events, or a person’s energy associated with the object, a practice known as psychometry. If you feel something coming, positive or negative, this is you tapping into this ability. When you’re around somebody and can feel their pain, that is you tapping into the ability. Many people who work in the healthcare industry (nurses, therapists, energy workers, and so on) are highly intuitive, empathic people who often practice this gift. Along with claircognizance and clairaudience, clairsentience are my strongest gifts. I can tap into and feel all sorts of things, and I know what I know when I feel it. I’ve learned to always trust it. I don’t want to say I’m always right with my psychic hits and messages, but I do believe that my spirit helpers don’t steer me wrong.
Quieting the Body
A vital practice of spiritual communication is knowing how to “quiet” yourself effectively. Sometimes we refer to this as being still or centering ourselves, or a kind of meditation. Whether you practice centering prayer, meditate, or just enjoy quiet time spent outside, learning how to effectively get still inside yourself is the very best way to get into a space that allows for communication with your soul self.
Quieting the body is different from quieting the mind. To quiet the body means coming into a place where your physical body can be without any movement. This is a situation in which the mind and body can help one another; when both are in unison in a soft, relaxing space, meditation becomes something of a practice and communication can become more likely. For this section, we will focus on calming the body first. If it’s easier for you to do this while lying down, start there. If you can do this while sitting cross-legged with a straight spine and open palms, even better. The manner in which you are positioned is not vital to the process, but it is part of the setting of intention. Some people can do it best while standing but relaxed. No matter how you do it, the moment you begin to quiet down, you will notice that your body often has a tough time getting comfortable. Sensations begin to amplify. The tag in your shirt, the sensation of your hair, any pains that have been lurking—they all come up in a multitude of ways when you attempt to be still. This is perfectly normal and happens to the best of us. The goal is to sit with those irritations long enough to relax and let go. Acknowledge the annoyance’s existence and then let it pass. Remember that being patient with this process aids in expanding the practice, and getting frustrated with yourself will do the opposite. No matter your body position for quieting yourself, know that you can achieve stillness. You will wait out the scratches, itches, weird sensations, and so on. Eventually you will win the body over either through time spent or using the mind to detach from physical annoyances. Both can get you to where you want to be, but you must practice. Keep coming back to your practice of centering and stilling the body. Do your practice in small increments, daily for best results.
Quieting the Mind
Learning to quiet the mind is different from learning to still the physical body. The mind becomes explosive when you try to come to a central point of focus and awareness. The monkey mind becomes loud and aggressive and will try anything to make you pay attention to it. Maybe you begin to compile a list of all the things you “need” to think about; all the items that need to be on your shopping list are of prime importance for some reason, now that you are trying to be quiet. When learning how to let the mind get to a still point, sometimes you have to take another route to get there. As you know from reading this book, I tend to offer up the backdoor routes to our desired destination when the straightforward ways don’t work. When the mind gets wired and fired, the best thing to do is ask for those thoughts to come in without reservation. Invite it all in instead of fighting against it. Now the trick is to take a step back from it and watch it all dance. You are no longer attached to your thoughts but are present for each one that comes in. You aren’t ignoring the thoughts, nor are you condemning them with a “Shh! Quiet!” mentality either. You are simply opening up to whatever comes through without attachment.
If you own dogs, maybe you’ve been told or have learned that if you yell at them when they are already barking, they think you are joining them and get louder. In other words, you are playing into a hyped-up energy that is already there. But if you refrain from yelling at your dog and take the calm approach to counterbalance the frenzy, they will likely follow your lead. It’s the same here: if you stay long enough with your monkey mind, it will tire itself out and take a nap. At worst, you will also tire out and take a nap as you wait for the mind to calm—a perfectly wonderful way to start with centering, quieting, and meditation as well. There is not a set of hard, fast rules on how to get yourself to quiet down. It only matters that you figure it out in the end. If you fall asleep, you’ve let yourself go enough to relax into a slumber. It’s certainly not a bad thing, though you should try not to let it become a habit. Meditation is a very specific time set out to get quiet and begin a practice of connecting yourself into the rhythm and flow of the Universe.
Practice: Quieting the Body and Mind
Here you will use your body to help your mind calm and your mind to help your body calm. Both can work in unison to get you to where you want to be once you learn how to work within yourself. Begin by calming down the physical body. There are a few ways to do this depending if your goal is to be standing, sitting, or lying down. I will take you through the various ways to place your body to get into a comfortable position that can help make it easier to receive information that might come through. Once we’ve learned the best physical body ways to get calm and quiet, we’ll add the mental piece that can go with any of the physical positions.
Option 1: Lying down: Lie down comfortably on your back in a place where you can unplug from the outside world. This could be in your bed or the floor. If you want to, place pillows under your knees. Bring the legs about 45 degrees out from the center line of the body and allow the feet to fall out to each side comfortably. Gently tuck the low back under and unroll the spine onto the surface beneath you. Bring the arms 45 degrees from the body and open the palms to face up to the sky. Slightly tuck your chin in but not down. This allows the base of the skull to lie comfortably against the surface beneath. Begin by taking a breath in and holding the breath as you tighten your feet, pointing your toes and lifting your legs one inch off the ground for just a moment. Exhale and drop the legs. Inhale and hold your breath as you lift your bottom and lower back off the floor and then exhale and relax and again lower the body and tuck the pelvis under. Inhale and lift your chest and upper back off the floor. Exhale and lower the back down and allow your spine to unroll itself onto the floor beneath. Inhale and lift your arms one inch off the ground, make a tight fist, then stretch your fingers out as wide as you can before you exhale and drop the arms back down. Inhale and lift your shoulders up to your ears and exhale and lower the shoulders back down. Gently turn your head so that one ear is on the floor. Slowly turn your head so that the other ear is to the floor. Lastly, inhale and hold the breath as you tighten all of the muscles on your face. Keep squeezing the jaws shut and the eyes closed tight. Exhale and open your eyes as wide as you can. Open your mouth as wide as you can. Stick your tongue out and exhale an audible roaring sound (this is the lion pose). Gently close your eyes and relax your jaws and allow your whole physical body to relax into itself. Notice your breath getting longer and deeper but quieter with its sound. Breathe and allow the energetic circulation to move throughout your entire body with each breath in and out.
Option 2: Sitting up in a chair: Put your feet flat with your back to the back of the chair. Keep your spine straight and chin slightly tucked in but not down. Your palms should face up, resting on your lap or in prayer position. It’s a little bit more difficult in this position to work through the body tightening and relaxing the way you would lying down. When sitting, the relaxation is done better with the mind and breath coming together. For this practice, you must rely on auto suggestion to calm the body through the mind. You can think of your body part and ask it to relax.
Repeat:
• Relax my feet—my feet are relaxed.
• Relax my ankles, shins, and knees—my ankles, shins, and knees are relaxed.
• Relax my entire legs—my entire legs are relaxed.
• Relax my buttocks, pelvis, lower back, middle back, ribs, stomach, and intestines—my entire lower body is relaxed.
• Relax my chest and upper back—my chest and back are relaxed.
• Relax my shoulders, arms, and hands—my shoulders, arms, and hands are relaxed.
• Relax my neck and throat—my neck and throat are relaxed.
• Relax my head and scalp—my head and scalp are relaxed.
• Relax my face and ears—my face and ears are relaxed.
• Relax my entire body—my entire body is relaxed.
Option 3: Seated meditation: This is the most widely used meditation position. There are many reasons for this; however, I cannot say exactly why that is. My guess is because if sitting properly with good posture, the spine (as well as the energetic spine, the sushumna) can be fully opened and allows access into the mind and spirit with greater ease. In this position, it is more likely that you can open all of the chakras and experience the opening of the Kundalini Shakti. The physical, energetic, emotional, and spiritual bodies all come together with a very strong conviction through this intention of proper body position and hand position. Place the palms facing up to receive the energy or with prayer hands to connect you into that cosmic energy. We sit legs crossed, either one in front of the other, one on top of the other, or in full lotus (where both legs are crossed and both feet rest up around the hip pockets of the legs). Try to avoid sitting cross-legged as you might naturally do it; one leg should be resting all the way over the other leg like a stacked wall rather than one foot blocking the energy of the other. Remember, energy moves throughout all of our limbs. We want to do all that we can to prevent ourselves from blocking any flow of the moving energy.
Option 4: Standing meditation: In practices of tai chi and qi gong, we use standing rather than seated meditation. We don’t want to fully bend or block any part of the energy body. Stand with the feet flat and barefoot (preferably outside on the natural earth’s surface). The feet should be shoulder width apart. The shoulders are slightly rounded. The crown of the head is directly facing the heavens without lifting the chin up. The chin is slightly tucked in, but not down. The tip of the tongue rests against the roof of the mouth behind the two front teeth and slightly back just at the mountain about an inch behind the two front teeth. The jaws are separated slightly in the mouth, and the top and bottom teeth are not touching. The hands can fall to your sides. The low back is slightly rounded and tucked under. Extend in your mind the tailbone as a real tail that goes all the way into the earth. The feet and tailbone tail make up the three points of balance for your body.
The knees are soft but not bent. Nothing is locked out—arms, legs, ankles, wrists; no locking or stiffness. Every joint and meridian line in your body is unobstructed, soft, and heavy. Try to allow all thoughts to come in until you can get to a space where you can empty them. Notice that the thoughts run straight through without any attachment until they filter out into a void of nothingness. You simply are one with heaven and earth. Freedom, healing, flow of energy is all that lives in this moment of peace, clarity, and unity with nature.
Hand Positioning
Hands are very much conductors of energy and can connect us to the quiet place in the body, in union with the mind. When we put the palms together at the chest in prayer position, we recognize that touching in that way produces something much deeper and profound. Putting your hands into prayer position is a universal hand mudra. There are also many other ways in which the hands conduct our connections, such as connecting the mudra of finger and thumb together while resting the hands on our knees. We see this in yoga and meditation practices while people sitting cross-legged or in full lotus position. There are many hand mudras where the various fingers represent different connections and movements, but rather than getting overly technical with hand positions, what we need to know is that any mudra is a conversation and connection between yourself and spirit. It’s an intention that decrees something like: “I am about to engage in a meditation or spiritual practice. I will connect these fingers and close my eyes and sit quietly in order to ask that my practice be accompanied by the great spirits as I connect.”
Clear the Mind
Once you have found your ideal position that will allow your body to get still, you can move into the mind for clearing. Begin by gathering your thoughts. Try to move those thoughts into a box with a tight lid and gently scoot them to the side of your mind and out of sight. We simply want to turn off the chatter. It is in the quieting of ourselves that communication is able to take place. The demands we would place on Spirit to have to yell and scream over our own wild mind is silly. They won’t do it. They shouldn’t have to do it. Create a space in which they can enter. Always first set your intentions with a prayer that only the highest light may enter.
When the thoughts in your head become too chaotic, turn them around and let them slide down. Imagine a huge funnel slide that goes down to the ground. When the thoughts come flooding in or you feel your body reacting to the heightened energy, let the thoughts come into your head freely. Don’t fight any of the feelings or thoughts—invite them in. Bring them all in and put them all on the slide: from the top of your head, watch those thoughts swirling down and around your body, out through your feet so that when it’s done, it’s done. You now leave them behind you. Once all the junky vibrations have emptied out and settled themselves, that’s when you can slow down. Take the rest and fill yourself back up with positive dialogue and self-love.
Centering
If prayer is the act of talking to a higher source and meditation is listening to your higher source, then centering is something in between. When centering, you are not talking, nor may you be in a full space where you are able to listen. You are simply present and calm—centered. For the purpose of calming and quieting the mind, we turn away from prayer because the goal here is to become completely still and silent. We enter into a place where there is nothing but you and your energy. In this practice, you quiet yourself enough to be welcomed to enter cosmic consciousness, which may be thought of as an entirely different world of energy and movement someplace just above you.
By getting clear and quiet, you can enter into the cosmic flow where time and space cease to exist. It’s always there, flowing and available, but you must be able to elevate your own consciousness in order to get yourself to this space. Anytime you choose to connect, you have to go deep within yourself in order to raise your vibration. Any chatter, doubting, or questioning will bring you back down into your body and in this plane. Whenever you rise up and enter this space, remember the practice and how it felt. As you practice more, you will be able to reach this higher vibration with greater confidence and ease.
Envision the Divine Spirit directly around your face and crown. Feel the energy collect around you. With eyes closed, begin to intermingle your breath with that of the Universe. Your exhale becomes the God/Goddess’s inhale. The God/Goddess then exhales onto you as you inhale and take it in. It becomes an exchange, breath from one to the other. Keep your eyes closed, and don’t get overly excited when you really begin to feel the exchange. The God/Goddess breathes out and you breathe it in. You breathe it out and they breathe it in. Continue for as long as you are able to be present and calm. Notice how your own energy expands with this practice.
You are in a place where your own vibration is raised so high that it is no longer in the physical realm of existence. This is not the time to observe your own thoughts; you have finally gotten the mind to quiet so that you can now observe the energy you might not have ever realized is available to you at all times. You are welcomed to enter into a higher place, the “something in between” mentioned in the section on centering. Remember, we are not trying to listen just yet—we are simply joining in on a conversation that our higher consciousness is holding. Allow your inner dialogue to get softer and softer until it is no longer audible at all. Open your third eye (the ajna chakra) in the center of your forehead and begin to listen differently to what is happening around you. Spirit generally does not communicate through words as much as imprints, images, and feelings. When you get those, don’t dismiss them or think you are reaching. You are finally entering into the cosmic consciousness of the universe. Trust what you are feeling. Build from that space and create your practice of Divine communication.
Do you hear sounds? Voices? Music? Nothing at all? Notice everything in this space but hold on to nothing. Do not be attached. If you are seeking answers to specific questions, understand that they generally won’t come through in this moment. They show themselves after with imprints, instincts, different thoughts, and momentum in your life as you begin looking further into alternate directions for guidance. For now, in this moment, simply allow yourself to elevate. You might get a tingling sensation in various areas, but do not be fixated on what you feel with your body, just notice it and go with it. Ride that wave up.
You don’t have to sit for a specific time period every time you attempt to meditate. It can be a couple of minutes or however long you have to give to it. If it doesn’t work today, try again tonight in bed or tomorrow. Meditation is a practice. Once you get into any flow of communication with the spirit realm, you will find that meditation will naturally come to be a part of your life. Therefore, don’t put too much pressure on yourself to get anywhere fast. It takes a lot of time, discipline, and desire to keep attempting something that can be this intimidating. The subtlety of the communication style is where you need to place your focus. As soon as you start to feel things come through, lock that experience in. Always aim to go back to that space and try to start from there with each practice.
Asking Questions
When we begin a dialogue with the spirit realm, it’s common to open with questions in our minds or out loud. Know that any questions you ask will be heard and answered but not necessarily within your desired timeframe. You will have to keep your eyes and ears open and be on the lookout for little hints or messages that may need to be deciphered. When we ask another person a question, we usually get a reply pretty much right away in a voice at the same decibel level as our own. Spirit does not work this way, however. Answers from Spirit arrive in all sorts of ways, and you will begin to develop a personal relationship with your spirit team to learn more intimately the manner in which they communicate with you. For example, it might be in an acquaintance or friend saying something that they had no idea you needed to hear. It could be in a book you randomly pick up, or through impressions or another hint you feel with your instincts. You might just suddenly and very strongly know the answer exactly. Before anything else, try to follow these two rules: (1) Be clear with your questions, and (2) Trust the impressions and information that you receive.
Receiving answers from Spirit is where the four clairs come into play. If clairaudience is your strength, you might receive your response through sounds, a voice, music, and so on. If you are more clairvoyant, then likely you will see mental images show up. If your strengths are more instinct based, then impressions will likely come to you straight through your gut or mind or you will just be able to feel it.
Personally, I receive thoughts and impressions and just know the right thing to do next. Sometimes when I ask the question out loud, from deep inside myself I will suddenly feel a very small thought that guides me to the answer. My answers from my team tend to be audio and gut in unison. I haven’t ever differentiated if what was answering was my own voice or spirits. Getting to this level has taken years of honing communication skills. Please don’t think that receiving answers via the clairs should come easily or quickly.
Instinct and Intuition
Instinct is something that occurs within yourself, that immediate reaction to certain people, smells, feelings, energies commonly felt in your solar plexus. Your body gives you a signal when something feels good or bad. Instinct kicks in immediately; there is no time to have a dialogue with spirit or anyone else. Recently I attended a talk on energy medicine and quantum physics. The speaker said something that resonated with me and made me think further. He said something to the effect that he trusts his intuition enough that he knows that if he sits with anything long enough, that he will be able to figure it out.
I am beginning to think that the term “intuition” is a simplified way of saying “connecting into a communication track between myself and something greater than myself.” It is not something that occurs inside myself by myself. Intuition is something we usually understand within a spiritual context or we wouldn’t offer intuitive development training. It’s often that the words “instinct” and “intuition” are used interchangeably when in truth they are not exactly alike—even though they both work toward a similar intention.
Conscious Blending
When meditation was presented in my yoga training, it was taught that when a person rises up to the levels of being in communication with Spirit, the ultimate aim is to move higher above those levels where communication is no longer part of the practice. The idea is to raise our vibration into cosmic consciousness where conversation of any kind does not exist. For the purpose of connection and communication with our spirit guides and helpers, however, we are trying to blend into a cosmic consciousness, which is a little different. The idea of this “conscious blending” came to me via Spirit in my own practice, where it was differentiated from “meditation” as it is usually defined. It was explained that in conscious blending, I am lifting my vibration up to the level where I am able to hear the voices that try to guide me in daily life. They said it is easier when we go up to them, rather than the usual asking them to come down to our human level, which is a lower vibration Spirit finds sludgy and dense. When we lift ourselves up to meet them, we begin to integrate this into our daily lives beyond a singular practice time.
Rising to the level of Spirit is what leads us to mindfulness in our thoughts, behaviors, and choices. I am reminded that with every sentence I write here, whomever I meet on the streets, how I speak to my children and family, the foods I choose to eat, and the choices I make every day all have the potential to elevate me into a higher alignment with my highest self. When I choose to live from the higher vibration, I am able to practice conscious blending. Maybe I don’t engage in conventional meditation as often as I engage in this blending of myself and spirit for the purpose of checking in and asking for further guidance. Conscious blending could still be considered a conventional form of meditation when thought of as a practice for particular times throughout your process of shifting. One is not better than the other—both are sacred practices.
Clearing ourselves enough to forge a pathway from ourselves to the higher consciousness is not an easy task, but it can be done. And it can be done by you. Trust that and start from that place. Asking the questions you need help with is best done at night just before you go to sleep. Ideally, you are free of mental clutter and the answers can permeate into your body with greater ease. Another way to ask is in the journaling method covered in the divination section. Write your questions and try to answer either in meditation or when you wake up first thing.
Dance, Art, and Music as Therapy to Connect with Spirit
Moving your body through dance, playing music, or creating art is a powerful way to get in tune with not only your passion but also the spirit realm. When we engage in intentional and creative practices such as these, we invite the angels of creativity and abundance to work directly with us. Have you ever noticed that we do not feel the passage of time when we are engaged in a creative activity and it seems like we have entered a dimension beyond our normal world? It’s almost like we go somewhere when we get lost in creativity and movements with purpose. This is where our souls come alive and our passions allow us to feel a deeper level of existence. Please make time in your day for some of this to come alive in you, whether it’s playing a musical instrument or listening to music that speaks to your soul. If you can, find satsang or a chanting class in your area; both are incredible ways to feel what occurs in the body when it is engaged in a communal singing/prayer practice. Even going to concerts can alter our body’s cells in such a way that it makes us healthier and more vibrant because we are doing something that makes us happy.
When it comes to dance for healing, there are many options, whether it’s taking a dance class or dancing in your kitchen. Dance is a form of prayer and celebration in many cultures, such as Sufi dancing, the Nia technique (nia is Swahili for “movement with purpose”), and Journey Dance with live drumming. There are dance companies such as 5Rhythms that bring spiritual dance to cities specifically for spiritual purposes. I’m fairly certain that wherever you are, there is something—a class, gathering, or event—near you that you might not have known about until you read this and went to search. When you engage in these dance communities, it is a high so much higher than anything synthetic. It is an elevation of the soul.
As for art therapy, it’s common in many cities to find classes that are like wine parties where friends come together and take an art class while enjoying wine. There are also channeled art classes that can help you to get into a spiritual trance in order to make your art pieces, although these kinds of classes are more than just music and art for fun. Channeled art classes are usually on a different level, though it is worth your time to find one and give it a try.
When you color, draw, paint, or write with intention—on your own or in a group—it can become a practice that can be the most cathartic form of healing throughout every layer of your body. Creative activity is where the divinity of practice merges with the physical self. The experience is spectacular and liberating; I highly encourage you to find your personal outlet that brings you into connection with the Divine.
Remember: Try not to overthink this stuff. It can be difficult, and will require discipline to keep showing up to figure out how you can get into that sacred rhythm and flow.
Remember: You can do it. You do have the gifts to make connections within this beautiful cosmic flow of communication. We all do. Two things to follow are:
1. Be clear with your questions.
2. Trust the impressions and information that you receive.