Chapter 20

 

Daniel knocked on Jamie's door.

 

"Jamie, can I come in?" he asked softly. As he waited for the sound of Jamie’s voice, the door swung open.

 

"You don’t need to knock," Jamie said softly, his hands at his neck, trying to fix his tie. Daniel couldn’t find his voice. Jamie in jeans and a T-shirt was hot, Jamie in sweats after a basketball game was hot, Jamie in a rented tux… hotter.

 

It had been a hard few months. Jamie had been left with some problems as he healed, in particular a fine scar that ran down the left side of his face and a fractured knee that had ruined his chances for a basketball scholarship. The scarring on his chest had healed a bit more, and the letters had lost their definition, for which Daniel was forever thankful despite Jamie’s matter-of-fact statement it was a badge of honor. The kids at school had looked at Jamie differently, no longer as a jock, but as a vulnerable teen. Some said he was gay, and that is why he was beaten up. The full story had come out in the last week.

 

Lucy admitted she had told Greg lies, admitted she had encouraged Greg to think Jamie had been leading her on while lying behind her back. She had been held for psychiatric tests and had disappeared from the school on a permanent basis. Evidently her parents had taken a plea bargain, and she was being homeschooled on probation. Greg had been released to his family but hadn’t been seen back at school since his arrest. His future was trashed, his college placement hanging in the balance, and his parents devastated. He had accepted his part in the attack, admitted he had been motivated by some kind of displaced macho revenge. He had even written a letter to Jamie explaining, apologizing… begging for some level of forgiveness.

 

Jamie received the letter the same day he heard from the hospital that his knee would never heal enough for him to play professional basketball. It hardened his heart.

 

School had been hard simply because “normal” had ended so suddenly. Daniel still sat with his friends, but Jamie had taken to sitting with them. In fact, the first day back at school, he stood thoughtfully between two tables, jocks and geeks. It took seconds to decide where he really wanted to be, and he settled in a chair next to Daniel, bumping his shoulder and exchanging nods with Steve. No one said a word when Tyler picked up his tray from his usual seat on the jock's table and came over to slide into the chair opposite Jamie.

 

"S’okay?" he said softly. No one said anything. Jamie looked at his friend, sensing the quiet around them that this defection from the jock table had caused.

 

"S’ok," he replied softly. He had Daniel, he had Daniel’s friends, and he had Tyler. He didn’t need basketball. It didn’t define his life. He had enough here, and he felt calm and settled and protected.

 

Prom plans had continued. Lucy might have disappeared, but her shocked friends had shouldered the mantle of organization, and it was scheduled for the beginning of May. Jamie stayed out of it. He wanted nothing to do with it and kept his head down.

 

He spent one rainy Saturday afternoon with his mom and dad looking at his options. His place at UCLA Arts had been partially funded with the basketball scholarship, but that wasn’t a problem. He had money from his grandmother.

 

Daniel spent the entire discussion pacing outside the kitchen doorway. He had money; he had lots of money. Sure it was tied up with so many provisos on what it should be used for until he was twenty-one it made his head spin. Still, he had been left enough by his own parents’ life insurance policies to keep him comfortable. He wanted to jump in and hand the whole lot over to the Walkers. They wouldn’t let him. He couldn’t understand their reasoning and vowed to himself he would find a way to give the money to them one day. Jamie wrote his acceptance letter to UCLA Arts and figured on a new start to life. Daniel wrote his regrets to Juilliard, wrote his acceptance to UCLA Arts, and they posted their letters on Sunday.

 

And now prom had arrived. Jamie stood in front of him in a suit, fiddling with his tie, and muttering something about torture as he turned back to the mirror. Daniel slumped down on the bed, watching his… boyfriend… get ready. He was gorgeous, sexy and all Daniel's. In his heart, he knew he was doing the right thing by not going he just hoped he didn’t fuck it all up. He had other issues he needed to come to terms with, places to visit, people to see.

 

"I wish you were coming with me," Jamie said softly, meeting Daniel’s eyes in the mirror.

 

"I know, Jamie, I know." Daniel smiled. "It's not my thing."

 

"I’ll miss you tonight."

 

"No you won't, Jamie; you’ll have Tyler." Daniel tried to lighten the situation, but Jamie was having none of it.

 

"I. Will. Miss. You. And I will be home as soon as I can."

 

"You look amazing, Jamie," Daniel said quickly. He crossed to stand next to Jamie, who in turn pulled him into a quick hug, laughing as Daniel immediately buried his face in Jamie’s neck, kissing his skin. Jamie moved into a kiss, soft and searching, both almost instantly hard. Jamie reached to cup Daniel’s face, angling his head to get a taste. Daniel just whimpered at the sensation of being held, his own hands curling in the front of Jamie’s shirt.

 

Daniel locked his hands behind Jamie’s back and hugged hard, hoping that Jamie would forgive him for what he was doing tonight.

 

"Jamie, Tyler is here." Their mom's voice echoed up the stairs.

 

"Coming, Mom."

 

"Tyler is picking you up?" Daniel asked curiously.

 

Jamie shrugged. "Well, Tyler and April are picking me up."

 

"Poor April." Daniel smirked.

 

Jamie thumped him on the arm, snagged his jacket, and left the room, taking the stairs carefully, his knee stiff and sore. Daniel followed him and then stopped at the top of the stairs. With a short wave, Jamie disappeared out the door. Daniel waited a good five minutes before going downstairs. He had to be sure Jamie had gone.

 

Sue was at the door, Don at her side, watching as Daniel came down the same stairs, duffle in one hand, laptop in the other. She looked sad, and Daniel could have sworn she was going to cry.

 

"Mom," he said gently, standing in front of her, his shoulders back, his eyes free of tears. He didn’t want anyone to think he doubted the wisdom of this journey.

 

"Daniel, you promise you will be careful," she said, pulling him into a hug. "Do you have your phone? And some money? Don, give him some money—"

 

"Mom, I have money, I have my phone. I’m only going to be a hundred and fifty miles away. I’ll be back before you know it."

 

"Phone us and let us know when you get there."

 

"I will."

 

"We love you, Daniel."

 

"I love you too."

 

"Promise you’ll phone."

 

"I promise."

 

He gave his dad a quick hug, picked up his bags, and walked out the door toward Mark’s old Toyota. He looked back for a final wave before starting the engine and pulling out of the drive, pointing the car north, and leaving his home in his mirror.

 

Daniel had driven a good part of his journey before he pulled over to refuel and get a drink. He looked at the time and saw it was eleven. He wondered how the prom was going, wondered if Jamie was home early, wondered if he had found the letter on his bed. He checked his cell. There were no missed calls so he assumed Jamie wasn’t home yet.

 

* * * * *

 

Jamie looked at his watch. Eleven-thirty. The time had gone faster than he’d thought, and actually, the prom had been better than he thought it would be, so all in all a good night. He had danced with friends as much as his knee allowed. He’d shot the breeze with Tyler and April, had a few serious chats with friends, survived a confrontation with the whole senior football team, minus Greg, and stood at the back as Tyler and April were crowned prom king and queen, feeling proud of his friend, who was clearly besotted with his girl.

 

He had end-of-year chats with teachers and spent a long time talking to Mrs. Monroe, whom he thanked profusely for recommending him to the drama department at UCLA. She simply pulled him into a crushing hug, whispering in his ear how proud she was of him and how he would do well, simply because she said he would. It made him smile, and his heart filled with pride. It had been a good thing going to prom. He’d needed it. It ended things, and it allowed other things to start.

 

At just before midnight, he called a taxi, sharing it with Billy from the basketball team, who didn’t quite know what to say to his ex-captain, despite being fairly inebriated from smuggled-in vodka. Billy was dropped off first, leaving Jamie to sit back in the cab, his eyes closed and excitement pulling at him. This was just the beginning of the rest of his life.

 

* * * * *

 

At 12:19, Daniel finally reached the outskirts of Reno, the skyline of buildings dominating his vision, the anxiety in the pit of his stomach curling as he stopped at a Holiday Inn and booked himself in. He walked to the room, checking his cell for missed calls, then curled fully dressed on the bed, exhaustion claiming him almost immediately.

 

* * * * *

 

At 12:25, Jamie arrived back home, and he smiled. He had stuff to tell Dan, important life-changing decisions. The front door opened as he approached it, and his mom stood in the spilling light from the foyer. She smiled, but he started to feel apprehensive. Why wasn’t Daniel at the door?

 

"Mom."

 

"Hello. Was it good?"

 

"Yeah, it was, better than I thought." He crossed the threshold, closing the door behind him, frowning. Still no Daniel.

 

"Is Dan in bed?" he asked

 

"Jamie darling, Daniel isn’t here."

 

"Where is he?"

 

"He’s gone to Nevada, to Reno, to his old home; he left a letter for you."

 

"He…" Jamie didn’t know what to say. His heart pounded in his chest, and he felt sick. Had Daniel run, had he left? "He’s gone… to…"

 

"To find his aunt, his mom's sister. He needed to go on his own, needed to get his head wrapped around the whole fostering business. He—"

 

"Did you know he was going?"

 

"We did; he took Mark’s car."

 

"Mark knew he was going?" I’m going to kill him.

 

"Jamie, darling, go and read the letter. We’ll be in the kitchen. When you’re finished, come and talk."