Pizzeria Il Gobbo was a happy exception to the rule.
In the midst of the neighborhood’s most well-to-do quarter, surrounded by designer boutiques and elegant florists’ shops, there was a steep uphill vicolo so narrow that cars couldn’t enter it; a few yards up the vicolo was the entrance to the pizzeria, marked with a tiny sign, and inside a narrow staircase leading up to the dining room, with fewer than ten tables and a small balcony.
Il Gobbo—the Hunchback—himself had been dead for many years, but he appeared in a yellowed photo, dressed in a pizza chef’s white smock and cap, short and twisted as a question mark, between two mustachioed gentlemen identified as Di Giacomo and Scarfoglio by the scribbled names below. The pizzeria was run these days by his grandson, a big gruff man who, despite his perfectly erect spinal column, had still inherited the nickname; this new Gobbo also possessed a substantial gut that confined him to the front of the restaurant, between the cash register and the oven: the stair leading up to the dining room was too narrow for him. A slender and agile young Polish woman named Yula took care of the waitressing; her appearance was yet another of the place’s attractions.
Twice a week, Giorgio Pisanelli went to have lunch at Il Gobbo with the only friend left to him; the only one he kept no secrets from, and the only one from whom he was willing to accept good-natured ribbing for his elaborate theories.
Yula greeted him as usual, as if she had been waiting for him all her life: “Ciao, Dottore! Monacello wait you at table.”
Pisanelli climbed up the stairs. Brother Leonardo Calisi, known as ’o Munaciello—the little monk—was a Franciscan from the monastery of Maria Annunziata. And what else were people going to call him: he stood four feet eleven inches, he dressed in a cassock and sandals even in the winter, was white-haired and blue-eyed, and his mischievous expression was ever present. If that poltergeist of pranks and jibes and minor acts of charity, that regular protagonist of Neopolitan legends known as ’o Munaciello, were ever to take living form, it could only be as Brother Leonardo Calisi.
Pisanelli found him at the table by the balcony, patiently waiting.
“How long, exactly, were you planning to make me wait? You do realize that I have a parish to run? Ten minutes to walk over here, ten minutes to walk back, and then a full hour before you decide to show up!”
Pisanelli, raised both hands, defending himself against the monk’s tirade. “Come on, we agreed on one o’clock and it’s only 1:10! And everyone in the neighborhood knows that no one’s set foot in that parish church for years now. You could just lock up and go home and no one would even notice.”
Brother Leonardo made a show of feigning offense: “How dare you, you disbeliever! It certainly is true that each judges others according to his own heart’s intentions, just like the proverb says. You never come to church so you think no one else does either. In fact, Maria Annunziata is the only church downtown that’s becoming more popular—both in terms of worshippers and as a location for religious ceremonies. My brothers and I have more work than we can hope to handle, and here you are, staining my conscience with the knowledge that I’m idling over lunch in a restaurant, instead of working with my fellow monks.”
Pisanelli had taken a seat with a small grimace of pain: “A criminal conspiracy, that’s what you are, you and your brother monks. One of these days I’ll ask one of our racketeering experts to look into the lot of you; I’m pretty sure we’ll dig up a nice case of fraud. My bet is that you’re laundering money for the Camorra.”
The monk nodded: “It’s true, but I know you’re a friend and you’d never tell a soul. But listen, let me ask: are you in pain? I saw you grimace just now . . .”
The policeman waved his hand distractedly: “Forget about it, let’s not ruin our meal. Just a little pain, now and then.”
“I don’t understand this nonchalance of yours. If I wore hiking boots instead of sandals, I’d kick your ass black and blue. You’re telling me that you have a disease that’s now perfectly treatable, and instead of going to see a doctor, you try to hide it? Have you lost your mind?”
“Leona’, I don’t know how many times I’ve told you: I don’t want to talk about it. We’re living in strange times—they declare you unfit for active duty at the drop of a hat, and next thing you know you’re sitting at home, alone with your thoughts and your ghosts. These days, now that Lorenzo’s gone, all I have is my work, and you know it. If it weren’t for my job, I’d already be dead, ever since . . . well, let’s just say I’d be dead. So I’m not telling anyone, and I expect you to keep it to yourself as well—if you don’t, you’ll be violating the secrecy of the confessional.”
The monk was trying to catch Yula’s attention so they could order.
“Aside from the fact that you didn’t tell me in confession, so technically I have no obligation to keep your secrets, I wouldn’t even know who to go tell, you big-headed cop. Ah, here you are, my lovely Yula, two margherita pizzas with extra mozzarella and two potato croquettes, the usual. In a hurry, I’ve got someplace to be. So what else is new?”
Again, Pisanelli waved vaguely.
“Well, you know, the last one was six months ago, that man who hanged himself in the bathroom. I managed to speak to his daughter, in Canada; she didn’t even come back for the funeral because she didn’t have enough money for a plane ticket, or so she said.”
“And what did she tell you?”
“What do you think she told me . . . that she didn’t understand why I was calling her, that her father ought to be left to rest in peace, that he’d made his own decision, reprehensible but understandable. That he was eighty years old, that in twenty years, he’d never managed to come to terms with her mother’s death. And that the note he’d left explained it all. Nonsense, in other words. That’s what she told me. And then she hung up on me.”
“And doesn’t that tell you something?” Brother Leonardo asked sadly. “Why do you have this obsession, that’s what I’d like to know. It’s a terrible thing, a mortal sin, a crime against life, to commit suicide. Still, people do it, they’ve always done it, and, I’m sorry to tell you, they’re always going to.”
Pisanelli furrowed his brow: “There’s suicide and then there’s suicide, Leona’. Some of them are plausible, the circumstances are explanation enough: young men dumped by their sweethearts, drug addicts unable to get a fix, and, in this slowdown, businessmen being throttled by debts and organized crime. But you’re going to have to explain to me why a man would kill himself because his wife died twenty years ago. And just how he managed to hang himself from the overhead light fixture in the bathroom after balancing precariously on the rim of the toilet—even though he’s eighty years old and practically crippled by arthritis. Why he left a note written in all caps: ‘I just can’t go on.’ No signature, no advance warning. He’s just like all the other cases: elderly, lonely, depressed. This has been happening over and over again for the past ten years; all have been in the same neighborhood, all have left very brief notes, written in caps or on a computer, never in their own handwriting. You have to admit it’s odd, don’t you?”
The monk rolled his blue eyes heavenward as if in despair: “Lord God, maybe You can help him. Would you mind telling me just what is it that you’re trying to prove? That the despair that comes with feeling old, alone, and useless isn’t a powerful enough motive to drive someone to end it all? You know, out there, right in the middle of these crowded streets, there’s more loneliness than you can imagine. Take it from me, I spend my time in the confessional listening to people tell me about the specters that overwhelm their hearts. Many of them lack the sheer physical courage, but trust me, there are plenty out there right now who’d be happy to have done with all this. Sometimes it’s hard to convince them it’s worth it to go on living despite that fact.”
The policeman waited until Yula had served them their food and the monk had crossed himself before answering: “I already know everything you’re telling me. And I know that you work hard to bring comfort to the people of this neighborhood, as if you really were ’o Munaciello himself. Still, it doesn’t add up, you know? I just see too many elements in common, too many peculiar details.”
Leonardo was devouring his pizza with unmistakable delight: “Mmm, you tell me how anyone can doubt the existence of God after eating a margherita pizza. Bless Il Gobbo, and bless you, too, since you’re so kind as to treat me to lunch, given my vow of poverty. But to get back to what we were saying, don’t you think that this theory of yours, that a serial killer is murdering depressed old people, smacks a little too much of an American TV show? Here in our country, these things—these particular kind of things at least—just don’t happen. And then I don’t understand what the alleged killer could possibly gain.”
Pisanelli turned defensive: “I never said that there’s definitely a serial killer. I’m just saying that these cases were filed away far too quickly, that’s all. These dead people deserved a little attention, before being disposed of with a rubber stamp at the bottom of a death certificate and an awkward funeral. And I’m also saying that silence in the aftermath of such an act is convenient for everyone, even the family.”
“My poor friend. You’re transferring your grief onto other people, that’s what you’re doing. Ever since we lost poor Carmen, you can’t seem to accept it. It’s very common, you know. If you only knew how often I’ve seen it happen . . .”
The policeman answered coldly: “Carmen has nothing to do with this, Leona’. Carmen was a very sick woman, and she simply couldn’t bring herself to face the terminal phase of her illness. And she took advantage of the fact that Lorenzo and I were both away to swallow a bottle of pills. She really did kill herself. These suicides are different.”
“I was the last one to see Carmen alive, do you remember that? We have her to thank for the fact that you and I even know each other; in her search for some relief from her depression, she turned to faith. And I’ll tell you now what I said to you at the time, that talking to her was like looking into an abyss. She was in despair, psychologically, she’d gone past the point of no return. But I’m convinced that she found her faith, in the end. And that the Lord took her in, even though the thing she did to herself was terrible. She just was too afraid of the pain the cancer was going to subject her to, before the end. Her brain was flooded with fear, and that’s why she did it; not because she had stopped loving you.”
Pisanelli looked out the window to conceal his tears. Just a few yards away, on the balcony across the narrow vicolo, sheets on a clothesline flapped in the wind like white flags.
“I talk to her, you know, Leona’. I still talk to her, as if she were alive. I’ll come home, and I talk to her. Sometimes, all night long. Do you think I’m losing my mind?”
The monk patted his friend’s hand, gently.
“No, my dear brother. You’re not losing your mind. You talk to her because Carmen really is with you, close to you. She watches you, and she follows you, and she hopes that you can free yourself from your obsessions. And that you take care of yourself, so you can live a long life. Because you do want to go on living, don’t you?”
Pisanelli met his friend’s gaze with his own tear-reddened eyes: “Yes, Leonardo. I want to live. I want to live so I can know for certain whether these dead people left this world willingly, or if they were forced to. That’s why I want to go on living. And that’s why I keep my prostate cancer to myself and tell no one else about it. First let me crack this case, and then I’ll be glad to die, too.”