Belle stared down at the note she held in her hand with a great deal of dismay. It had arrived just as she sat down for breakfast and had had the immediate effect of ruining her appetite. The note was very curt and to the point.
—As one of your contractual obligations you will do me the honour of accompanying me to the Theatre Royal tonight. We will return to my house after the performance.
Westmore.
She crumpled it and resisted the urge to tear the page into small pieces and forget she had ever made such a bargain. But that would never do. Then he would distress Chloe with his attentions and poor Maria would probably go into a severe decline. Arthur would do everything in his power to make certain Chloe became a Duchess while Lady Georgina would do everything in her power to make certain Chloe did not. She shuddered just thinking about it.
Oh, dear. She took a sip from her coffee, which was now cold, and then shoved the cup aside. Agitated, she rose and went to stand near the window. Everything was about to become very complicated. She must cry off from attending the theatre with Maria, Chloe and Arthur and then they would see her there with Justin. She could hardly keep it a secret from them.
She really had no choice but to tell Maria the truth. She was going to the theatre with Justin.
Her mother-in-law stared at her, her face incredulous. Two spots of red colour appeared in her cheeks and then she fell back against the sofa with a little shriek. ‘No! It was bad enough you stood up with him last night. But to attend the theatre with him?’ Her voice rose. ‘How can you? Are you so unfeeling that you would consort with the man who…who killed my son? You have always been a daughter to me and now you are betraying me!’
Belle tried to take Maria’s hand but the older woman snatched it away. ‘Please do not touch me! I do not know why you are doing this? Is it possible you are in love with him?’
Belle flinched and a wave of anger hit her with stunning force. She spoke before she could think. ‘No! How can you say such a thing? How can you even think such a thing? The only reason I am doing this is to protect Chloe. He will leave Chloe alone in exchange for my company. Otherwise he will continue to pursue her.’
Maria’s mouth fell open. ‘You are protecting Chloe from his attentions?’ She stared at Belle, her eyes growing wider. ‘Oh, how can he be so wicked as to pursue her when he must know we revile him? But if you go to the theatre with him he will stop? Why?’
Belle suddenly regretted she had spoken. She said tiredly, ‘I do not know. It is what he has agreed to.’
She had no idea what Maria would say but she was hardly prepared for Maria’s next words. ‘Oh, my dear! I quite see how it is. You are sacrificing yourself for Chloe. How could I doubt you! You must be the best of daughters-in-law!’ She enfolded Belle in a swooping embrace that smelled of cloying perfume. She released her then sat back and sniffed. ‘How brave you are! I do not care what anyone will think or say when they see you with him.’
‘I pray you will not say a thing to anyone about this. Particularly not to Chloe.’
‘Of course I will not,’ she said indignantly. A little frown creased her brow. ‘So you are only going to the theatre with him?’
‘No, he wishes me to spend more time in his company.’
Maria stared at her. ‘More time? Does he wish you to…to become his mistress?’
‘I…’ She looked at Maria, feeling helpless. Her cheeks heated. ‘No, of course not.’
Maria’s eyes widened. ‘I am certain he does. I see everything now! He was in love with you and wished to provoke a quarrel with Lucien so he might have you. But you refused him and now he means to have you any way he can!’
‘No, it is not that at all.’
Maria paid no heed. ‘Oh, my love, you must be careful. You will have no reputation and then Chloe’s will be quite ruined! The Duke of Westmore’s mistress! I quite see, he means to ruin all of us!’ She closed her eyes and emitted a wail.
‘No, he will not. I will see to it he does not.’
Maria’s eyes opened. ‘No, I know you will not let anything happen to us. Or to harm Chloe. Which is why I must ask that you do not see Chloe for the rest of the Season.’
Belle stared at her. ‘Not see Chloe?’
‘You do understand why, do you not?’ Maria asked. Her eyes were fixed on Belle. ‘I perfectly understand the sacrifice you are making, but others will not and if it appears we condone your association…my dear, you must see that it will not do Chloe any good at all!’
‘No, it would not,’ she said slowly. She rose, her legs unsteady. ‘I must go. Please give Chloe my love and tell her…tell her…’ but she could not finish. She picked up her reticule and bonnet and nearly ran from the room. She heard Maria’s surprised protest but she had no desire to burst into tears in front of her. She climbed into her carriage and sat down, clutching her reticule and praying she would not weep. But she could not so easily stop the wretchedness in her heart that made her feel as if she had just cut herself off from all that was good.
Justin glanced at his companion who was seated next to him in the box. She had been quiet and obviously distracted ever since he had called for her three-quarters of an hour ago. She had politely answered his questions, but she might as well be on another continent as far as he was concerned.
She suddenly stiffened, her attention caught by something. He looked over and saw Lady Ralston and Lady Chloe being escorted into a box by Lord Ralston. ‘Do not worry, I have given you my promise that I will not pursue your sister-in-law,’ he told her.
She turned and looked at him. Her fine eyes were full of such misery that he was taken aback. Then her expression veiled. ‘I am not worried,’ she said politely.
‘Then what is it?’
‘Nothing at all.’ She folded her hands back in her lap. ‘I have not been in the Theatre Royal before.’
‘Your husband did not bring you here?’
‘No, he did not.’ She made an obvious effort to look at him. ‘I have heard this is an excellent play.’
‘Yes. There is no need to force yourself to make conversation,’ he said drily.
‘I beg your pardon. I fear I cannot think of much to say tonight.’
‘Apparently not. You might, however, look as if you take some pleasure in my company.’
For the first time her eyes flashed anger. ‘Why? Is that part of our contract? That I must enjoy this?’
At least she showed him something besides indifference. He folded his arms. ‘I would like that, yes.’
‘Very well.’ She gave him a tight smile. But then her gaze went in the direction of Ralston’s box. She looked quickly away. Her cheeks heated with colour. The curtain went up, but not before Justin caught a glimpse of Ralston’s outraged face.
Brandt was the first person to join them at the interval. With him was Henry Aubrey. Justin stood, and Belle did as well. He glanced at her. ‘You know my cousin. Have you met Aubrey?’
‘Yes,’ Belle said. Her smile was strained. ‘Good evening, Lord Salcombe, Mr Aubrey.’
Brandt inclined his head. ‘Lady Milborne.’ His expression was cool. ‘You are enjoying the performance?’
‘Very much.’ She was still polite, nothing in her expression revealing how she felt at Brandt’s icy manner.
For some reason Justin wanted to box his cousin’s ears.
Aubrey’s face held curiosity, but his manner was more open. ‘Are you? Will own I could not understand the actress who played Perdita or Prudence or whatever the d…she was called.’
Belle’s face relaxed a little. ‘Her diction was not the best.’
Brandt had turned to Justin. ‘So you purchased Chiswick’s colt today.’
His preoccupation with Belle had almost made him forget about the animal. ‘I signed the papers this morning. I’ll leave for Surrey tomorrow to fetch him.’
‘Chiswick’s bay devil?’ Aubrey said. ‘Good God! His bloodlines are impeccable, but he’s a nasty temper from what I’ve been told. Bit a groom. Bolted with Chiswick and dumped him in a heap of…’ he glanced at Belle ‘…er mud.’
‘Which is precisely what I’d do if someone as heavy-handed as Chiswick was on my back,’ Brandt said.
By this time Lord Henly had joined them. He was stout with a face that resembled a pig’s and a roving eye. He ran his gaze over Belle in a brazen fashion that made Justin want to hit him and then positioned himself far too close to her. When he launched into a discussion of the various attributes of the actresses, Justin decided it was time to leave.
He turned to Belle, who stood quietly listening. ‘Come and take a turn around the lobby with me.’
She hesitated and then followed him from the box. ‘Do you not wish to stay with your friends?’
‘No. Henly will undoubtedly regale us with his comments on certain parts of the female anatomy. They are not fit for your ears.’
‘I can assure you that after marriage to Lucien I am not easily shocked. Besides, Lord Henly visited Lucien more than once.’ She spoke calmly but colour touched her cheek.
‘Of course. I had nearly forgotten you were married to one of the most notorious rakes in England.’ As well as that beneath her quiet façade was an adventuress, and the slight flush staining her cheeks had nothing to do with modesty.
She looked at him. ‘Had you? I fear that is something I have never been allowed to forget.’ She glanced over his shoulder. ‘Good evening, Lady Burlington.’
He started, having nearly forgotten where they were. In the middle of a London theatre where he had intended to parade to the ton that she was his. Certainly he had accomplished his objective if the number of curious stares they received were any indication. Only Belle did not seem to notice. She stood a little aloof and he wanted more and more to shake her out of it. He did not want to return to their box. He wanted to be alone with her. To feel her mouth beneath his and her soft curves pressed against him. He scowled. ‘We are leaving,’ he said abruptly.
Surprise showed in her face. ‘But the next act is about to begin.’
‘The prospect of missing it hardly pains me. I came to be seen with you, not because I wished to watch the play.’
‘Indeed. I do not suppose it might occur to you that I might actually want to watch the play?’
‘No.’ He frowned at her, wanting to tell her that it did not matter what she wished, but her expression gave him pause. ‘Do you?’
She lifted her chin and looked at him. ‘No, for it is really not a very good play, but I might have wanted to.’
His brow shot up. ‘I fail to see the point of this conversation. I wish to leave and you wish to leave.’
‘The point is that I am not your lap dog. I will not allow you to dictate to me.’
He bit back his impatience. ‘I was not attempting to dictate to you. I’ve no idea why you decided to disagree with me when there was no need to. Shall we go since we are both in agreement?’
Belle opened her mouth as if she wished to say something else and then closed it. She turned and started towards the steps. He felt his temper rise but, before he caught up with her, she stopped.
Her mother-in-law was coming towards her with Lady Chloe and he watched as Lady Ralston drifted past Belle without the least acknowledgement that she was there. Lady Chloe sent her a brief stricken glance before continuing on. Belle lifted her head and then continued walking as if nothing had happened.
He reached her side and caught her arm. ‘What the devil was that all about?’
She barely looked at him. ‘I have no idea what you are talking about.’
‘Lady Ralston just gave you the cut direct. As did your sister-in-law.’
‘Did she?’ She looked straight ahead.
He realised several people watched them. His desire to be on display had been abating rapidly and now it died. ‘We will discuss this later. We are leaving now.’ He took her to the entrance hall and then sent for her shawl, and his hat and gloves. He did not speak again until they were in his carriage and it had started to move through the London streets.
‘Do you know why your in-laws just cut you?’ he demanded.
She tore her gaze from the window. ‘I rather expect it was because I was with you. I would rather not discuss it, if you please.’
She sniffed as if she were fighting back tears. If she had actually cried or raged at him or raged at her in-laws, he might have remained unmoved or perhaps been even contemptuous, but that little sound took him aback. The next thing he knew he was sitting next to her. His arms went around her and he pulled her against him. ‘Don’t,’ he said roughly.
‘Don’t what?’
‘Cry.’ Her scent filled his nostrils. A soft blend of rose and femininity. He suddenly thought of his mother, for she too had smelled of roses. But Belle’s warm frame was hardly maternal. His arms tightened.
‘I am not crying.’ She lifted her head and looked at him. She sniffed again.
‘You are.’ Her lips were too invitingly close. With a groan he covered them with his. A little gasp escaped her and her hands clutched at his coat as the carriage hit a bump. His arms tightened, pulling her closer and his mouth moved roughly over hers, demanding her response.
Her lips parted slightly and he deepened the kiss. Her taste and smell intoxicated him and it wasn’t until he felt her stiffen under him and heard her little sound almost of pain that he realised he was half on her in the darkened carriage.
He lifted his head and dropped his arms. ‘I beg your pardon.’ He moved away from her, trying to regain his senses.
‘There is no need to under the circumstances. It was just my reticule was under me. I think I sat on a pin.’
‘Are you hurt?’
‘No. It was the merest of pin-pricks.’
Her voice was calm, too calm, whereas he felt as if he was on fire. He moved back to his seat across from her. What the devil was wrong with him? He’d nearly lost control of himself, attacking her with the loss of restraint of a callow youth with his first love.
That was not part of his plan. He had no intention of relinquishing control. He might desire her, but he intended to keep it firmly in check with no other complicating emotions.
Justin realised the carriage had halted in front of his house. He stepped down first and then helped her out.
He kept his voice and expression as cool as hers as he escorted her up the steps of his townhouse and into the entry hall. But he did not feel nearly as cool inside when he said, ‘We can go to my apartments.’ His voice came out rougher than he’d intended as he held out his hand.
She nodded and that was when he saw the apprehension in her eyes. It was gone quickly, but there was no mistaking it or the tremor of her hand as his closed around it. He realised then that she was not nearly as calm as she appeared to be. In fact, just the opposite. She was frightened. Which, whether he liked it or not, would complicate everything.
Her mouth dry, Belle glanced at Justin as they climbed the winding staircase. His expression was brooding. He had said little since he had kissed her in the carriage and then apologised, which had completely confused her. His manner had been polite almost as if she was a stranger he found himself entertaining, certainly not that of a potential lover.
He pushed open a door and she found herself in a darkened bedchamber. Only the light of the full moon provided any illumination. Her legs had quit trembling and she found she was detached, the way she had been when with Lucien. With a calm indifference she noted the bed was simple and old-fashioned with brocade hangings and there was a small table next to the bed and that the wardrobe was plain. A portrait hung over the mantelpiece. He put the candle down on the small stand and then turned to look at her. ‘Do you want more light?’
‘No. This will be adequate.’ She moved towards him. ‘What would you like me to do? Should I undress?’
‘No.’ His eyes swept over her face and then narrowed. ‘Are you always this aloof when you are with your lovers?’
‘I have never had any lovers.’
‘No? Then what of the man you mentioned before? The man who taught you that physical intimacy and love are not the same?’ His voice had a hardness to it.
She looked at him, surprised, and then remembered what she had said to him in her anger. ‘I was referring to Lucien.’
‘Lucien?’
‘Yes. My husband. I have never been with anyone but him.’
‘Were you in love with him?’ he asked harshly.
She looked away. ‘I do not wish to discuss Lucien.’
‘No.’ He moved away from her. ‘I have changed my mind. You may undress now.’
She looked up and realised he had come to lean against the bed post. His arms were folded, but the shadows prevented her from seeing his face. But she knew one thing, he was going to watch her.
Having no clue how to proceed, she finally sat down on the bed and pulled off her gloves. She placed them on the table near the bed and then bent down to remove her slippers. Her hand trembled as she untied the laces and then slipped them off. She pulled up her skirt as far as she could without baring her entire leg and started to unroll her silk stockings. She kept her eyes on the task, her face heating with unwelcome colour. She managed to get both stockings off and then rose.
Did he expect her to unlace her own dress? She had only attempted to do so a few times in her entire life. She forced herself to look at him. ‘I do not think I can undo the laces of my dress myself.’ Her voice did not sound at all like her own.
‘I’ll do it. Come here.’
She came to stand in front of him and felt his fingers at her back, cool as they brushed her bare skin. She closed her eyes as he undid the fastenings of her dress, trying to quell the disturbing sensations his touch wrought in her. And then her silk gown was falling from her shoulders and his hands were at her hips sliding the material so that it pooled at her feet.
She heard him catch his breath. ‘Turn around, Belle.’ His voice was husky with desire.
She did and resisted the urge to close her eyes as he looked at her. She felt vulnerable and stripped of everything as his darkening gaze rested on the mounds of her breasts pushed high by the stays. His eyes travelled to the curve of her hips and she felt almost faint with apprehension.
‘You are so damnably beautiful.’ He sounded almost reluctant to admit it. ‘Take the pins from your hair. I want to see it around your shoulders.’
She hesitated and then lifted her hands to her hair. Her fingers shook as she removed them and she felt her hair falling to brush her bare shoulders. She put the pins on the table with her gloves and then turned. He still watched her. ‘What do you want me to do now?’ she asked. At least this time her voice was more contained and normal. She would get through this. Nothing he did could be any worse than being with Lucien.
He stared at her and blinked almost as if he had awoken from a trance. ‘Do next? My dear Belle, does nothing shake your composure? You are standing in front of me half-dressed and you still sound as if you are inquiring whether I would like a cup of tea. Does it not fluster you in the least that I want to take you to my bed and ravish you until dawn?’
She started. ‘Until dawn? I rather thought we would be finished within an hour. Perhaps two at the most.’
His smile was dangerous. ‘An hour or two? That is not nearly enough time.’
‘But whatever does one do for so long?’
He stepped towards her and she found herself backed up against the bed. ‘That, my sweet Belle, is what I intend to show you.’
She forced herself to remain still, her eyes on his face. He looked rather angry and his eyes had a wild glitter. Her heart was beating so quickly she felt almost dizzy and her legs trembled. Justin’s hand cupped the back of her head and he brought his mouth down on hers in a hard, possessive kiss. She gasped and then stilled as his mouth moved over hers, demanding her surrender. His arms locked her to his hard chest and she fought to force the panic down, forced her mind to go elsewhere as she had done with Lucien. So when his arms fell away, she felt completely disorientated. ‘Damn it, Belle,’ he said harshly. ‘This is not what I want.’
Her eyes opened and she stared at him. ‘What is wrong?’
He took a pace away from her and ran a hand through his hair. ‘This. I feel as if I’m about to commit a rape. I cannot force you to my bed.’
‘But you are not. I am willing.’
He gave a short laugh. ‘Are you? Then why did I have the sense you were terrified when I held you? I thought you were about to swoon in my arms.’
She looked away, mortified and ashamed. ‘I do not like to be held so tightly. I feel as if I cannot breathe.’ Which was not exactly a lie.
‘Is that all?’ he demanded.
‘Yes.’ She forced herself to look at him. ‘So, if you wish to proceed, I am more than willing.’
‘Not with you so terrified. What the hell did Milborne do to you?’
‘Nothing.’ She rubbed her arms where his hands had grasped her. ‘I did not like the marriage bed at all. He left me in no doubt that he found me quite inadequate, although he assured me that his mistresses made up for my lack. I fear, however, you will find me a poor mistress, which is why I think it best if we proceed to the point quickly and then I can go home.’
‘No.’
She glanced up at him. The anger in his face stunned her. She backed up a pace and stared at him.
His face was dark. ‘I’ve no intention of taking you while you lie there forcing yourself to submit. I am not that base. When you come to my bed it will pleasure you as much as it pleasures me.’
‘It is really not necessary.’ Oh, lord. She did not want to find out what he meant by pleasure. She wanted to stay as uninvolved as possible and then, after she paid her debts, return to her quiet life.
‘Oh, but it is.’ The menace in his voice coupled with the look in his eye told her he had no intention of letting this go.
With growing trepidation she watched as he sat down on the edge of the bed and removed his shoes. Then he deliberately removed his stockings. He stood and started to shrug out of his evening coat.
‘Wh…what are you doing?’ Surely he wasn’t planning to strip in front of her? Not even Lucien had done that.
‘Merely levelling the field.’ He removed his coat and then his waistcoat followed. He picked them up and draped them over a chair and then picked up her gown from the floor and dropped it carelessly on top of his clothing. She swallowed as he came towards her and took a step back. Her knees hit the bed and she sat down abruptly. With a smooth movement he joined her.
‘Good. This is where we start.’ His thigh pressed into hers as he squarely met her eyes. ‘I’ll wager that by the end of this lesson you will not be so eager to quit my bed.’
‘What lesson?’
‘The lesson we are about to start. The lesson where I teach you what a man wants in a mistress.’ A peculiar little smile touched his mouth.
She swallowed again. ‘I don’t really want any such lessons. I do not plan to do this again.’
‘That does not matter,’ he said softly. His hand lightly brushed her cheek and then he tilted her chin up. ‘I am going to kiss you. We’ll start there.’
‘No—’ Her protest was silenced by his mouth. She braced herself, expecting the same harsh assault as before, but instead his lips moved over hers in gentle exploration. One hand cupped the back of her neck, tangling in her hair. With some surprise, she realised the sensation of his mouth on hers was not at all unpleasant. Her lips parted under the light pressure and then he pulled her more firmly against him.
His tongue slipped inside. Instead of the revulsion she had felt with Lucien, she found the sensation pleasurable. She tentatively touched his tongue with her own. Justin made a sound almost like a groan in his throat and his kiss deepened. Instead of pulling away, she pressed against him.
Then his mouth left her neck and was placing a fiery trail of kisses down it to the soft exposed skin of her breasts.
He lifted his head and she opened her eyes to find him watching her with a dazed expression. ‘I think you are ready for the next lesson,’ he whispered. ‘But first this must come off.’ His hand brushed her stays. ‘Turn around.’
She obeyed, wondering what she was doing. Her lips felt swollen and her body curiously languid. The touch of his fingers as he undid the laces made her feel peculiar. Her stays fell away. One arm came around her and pulled her against him and through the thin linen of her shift she could feel the hard muscles of his chest against her back. He began to kiss her neck again, but when his free hand cupped her breast, she stiffened.
His hand fell away. ‘What is it?’ he asked. His breath was warm on her cheek. ‘Do you not like that?’
‘I do not mind. Please go on.’ Her face was suffused with colour and she was glad he could not see her. She supposed it was something women liked or at least were expected to tolerate but she had always felt violated.
His hand left her breast. ‘Not if you do not like it. But do you like this?’ He caressed her stomach through her shift in gentle, languorous circles. A slow heat began to grow in her and she pressed back against him. When his hand circled closer to the juncture of her thighs, she grabbed it. But then remembered she was supposed to let him do these things to her so her hand fell away.
He did not seem to notice. ‘We can lie down now.’ And then she was on her back and he was over her. She closed her eyes and waited for him to lift her shift but instead he stroked her face. And then he was kissing her again in that slow exploratory way as if he had all the time in the world.
Belle’s arms came around his shoulders and she felt the hard muscles of his back through his shirt. Her hand moved up and entangled in his thick hair. Her head seemed to spin and she was kissing him back. She was vaguely aware that his hand was again caressing her stomach and hips, creating exquisite sensation. His hand moved lower and she forced herself to relax. But she could not quite help her little start of surprise when he began to caress her most private parts. ‘Shh…’ he said against her mouth. His fingers were stroking her and despite the barrier of her shift, she could feel a warm growing heaviness between her thighs. His tongue was teasing hers and his hand kept its steady slow rhythmic caress. She fought the urge to part her legs but the spiral of sensation seemed to be growing smaller and smaller and focused on where his hand was. She pressed against him and then cried out as the heaviness shattered into an exquisite pleasure.
He withdrew his hand and lifted his head. She kept her eyes closed, not wanting to see the triumph he must feel over her surrender. Worse, he had not even had to remove all of her clothes. Or his.
‘Belle.’ She felt his weight shift away from her.
She opened her eyes. Justin sat on the edge of the bed. ‘I believe that is enough of a lesson for tonight. I will help you dress and then take you home.’ His voice was polite.
‘Very well.’ She sat up, trying to tell herself she should be grateful for his manner, that he was not rubbing in his victory, but instead she felt confused.
He helped her dress, his movements so efficient she thought he must do this often, hardly a pleasing notion.
‘Damn,’ he muttered.
‘Is something wrong?’
‘I’ve managed to miss a fastening. I’ll have to start again.’
‘No!’ She turned around, not wanting to have him touch her any more than necessary. ‘It does not matter.’
He scowled. ‘But there’s a gap in the back.’
‘Since I am only going home and not out in public it hardly matters. I will be taking it off again anyway.’ Although her maid would probably wonder what she had done. But it was too late for any of those considerations now.
‘Always so practical.’
She had no idea whether it was a compliment or not. She followed him down the stairs and then he fetched her shawl. He had fallen into another brooding silence and she had no idea what he was thinking. He said nothing until he had helped her from the carriage. ‘I will leave for Surrey tomorrow.’
‘To get your horse?’
‘Yes. I will return the day after. I will call on you then.’
‘As it pleases you. Good night, your Grace.’ She had started to leave when he caught her hand and pulled her around to face him.
‘It does please me. As you did tonight. We’ll finish the rest of the lessons when I return.’ He cupped her chin and brushed her mouth quickly with his. ‘Goodnight, Belle.’
‘Goodnight,’ she whispered and turned and ran up the steps without looking back.