Three days later, Josh was discharged from the hospital. The trial in Greensboro had continued. Shante persuaded Max to return to work. She stayed at the hospital with Josh during the day, and Max took over each evening. Miss Mabel took care of Jonathan and Jacob during the day and they spent their nights at Shante’s house.
“He’s baaack,” Camille said as Joshua rushed into the house past her. He couldn’t wait to show Jonathan and Jacob his cast and the pictures a hospital volunteer had drawn on it.
“Hey, Mom. Max, I see he’s back to normal,” Camille said as they too came into the house.
“He is better than a few days ago,” Shante said, “but he still has a long way to go. He’ll need physical therapy after his cast is taken off.”
“Tay, I’m leaving for Greensboro now. Are you sure it’s okay for me to go? Josh just got out the hospital; maybe I should be here,” Max said.
“Don’t be silly. His arm is broken; he’ll be fine. Look at him—he’s all over the place. I’m sure I can handle it,” Shante replied. “You go ahead. I got this.”
“Well, if you say so. Do you need anything?”
“No, I don’t need anything. You better get going if you are going to make it to the courthouse for the start of afternoon session. Come on, I’ll walk you to the car.”
Max put his arm around Shante’s waist as though it was the most natural thing to do. “I’ll see you this evening,” he said, hugging her. I appreciate your doing this for me. The boys like having you around.”
“And what about you?”
“I like having you around, too.” He smiled and kissed her lips.
Watching Max drive away, Shante knew she had started something she shouldn’t have. She didn’t know how to stop it, or even if she wanted to.
* * *
Shante had finally gotten the boys settled. She helped Joshua put on his pajamas and read him a story before tucking him in.
“Mama Tay, are you staying at our house tonight?” Josh asked her as he lay in his bed.
“Not tonight. Your dad will be here in a few minutes. But I’ll be here until you fall asleep,” she replied.
“Are you going to live with us?”
“No. Where did you get such an idea?
“Cammy said you and Dad were in love, and when people love each other, they live together.”
Note to self: Kill Camille when I get home. “That’s true. I do love you and your brothers, but I can’t move in here. I have my own house. What would Cammy do if I moved out?”
“She can live with us, too. She can have Jonathan’s room—”
“And you need to say your prayers and get to sleep.” “Mama Tay?”
“Yes, Josh?”
“Do you love my daddy, too?”
Looking into his expectant eyes, she was silent. She knew what he wanted to hear. She wasn’t sure she should tell him the truth. “Yes, Josh, I love your daddy, too. It’s time for you to go to sleep now. Say your prayers.”
“God, thank you for letting me come back home to my daddy and brothers and all my toys. Thank you for all the presents, and God, let Mama Tay and Cammy move in with us because we love each other. Amen.”
“Get some rest, Josh.”
She sat on the edge of the bed caressing the healing scars on his face until he fell asleep. She checked on the other boys and started down the stairs. Max was waiting at the bottom. He still had his suit on, but had loosened his tie and the top two buttons of his shirt. He was leaning on the railing looking up at her. She heard soft music playing.
“Max, how long have you been here?” she asked. “I didn’t hear you come in.”
“A few minutes.”
She stopped one stair from the bottom, bringing her eye-to-eye with Max. “You look tired,” she said gently rubbing the back of his head.
He put his head on her shoulder. She hugged him, and he squeezed her around the waist. He began rubbing his face against hers. She could feel his new beard as he slowly made his way to her lips. They kissed with a passion she hadn’t felt in a long time. She felt every part of him touching her body. Their kiss grew deeper, and she didn’t want to stop. His hands explored her back, touching every inch of it before moving to the small of her back.
Shante, wake up. You can’t do this. You’re a Christian. Do something quick. She didn’t want to let go. She felt herself begin exploring him. She could feel his firm body as she pressed into him. Shante, stop. She reached behind her and grabbed his hands and moved them to her sides. She pulled away.
“Come on, Max. You’re tired. Want something to eat?” She started walking toward the kitchen.
“No. Gary and I stopped and got something. How’s Josh?”
“He’s the neighborhood celebrity. That child is so outgoing—seems like nothing gets him down.”
“Jon and Jake, have they been a problem?”
“No. They’re upstairs watching TV.”
They went into the family room and she sat on the sofa. He threw his jacket on the love seat and sat next to her. He leaned back and let out a sigh.
“A difficult day in court?”
“Not really, just long. Looks like this thing is going to last into next week. I was hoping it wouldn’t take this long. Everything looks good for us now. But, you never know how the jury is going to react.”
“Have you thought about staying in Greensboro until the hearing is over? The boys can stay with me.”
“I can’t do that. I still have to do things at the church. We still have a lot to do before the grand opening of the family life center.”
“That’s right. Do you need me to do anything?” “Hold me.”
“Come here.” She knew she shouldn’t go any further with him, but she convinced herself she was helping. Max curled up on the sofa with his head in her lap, and she massaged his temples. She caressed his head and body until she heard him snoring. God, what am I doing? I have not only crossed the line, I have gone down the street. I have got to get out of here. “Max, Max.”
“Uh hum. ”
“I’ve got to go. You’re tired and sleeping.”
“I wasn’t sleeping; I was meditating.”
“It’s late. I need to go.”
“I don’t want you to go,” Max said, sitting up on the sofa and stretching.
“I have to go. Come on, walk me to my car.” She went up and said good night to the boys, and she and Max then walked to her car.
“Call me when you get home.”
“Okay.”
They kissed goodnight and she made her way home.
“How could I have let it go this far? I kissed Max at the hospital because I knew he needed comfort. Now it has gotten out of hand. God, what should I do? I’m getting into dangerous territory,” she said out loud.
She thought about the kiss and how she longed to be held like that again. It had been so long since she had felt such passion and energy. She had thought filling her day with work would keep her from thinking about sex and keep her lust under control. And it had worked for sev eral years. But now, she had crossed the line. She had opened a door that shouldn’t have been opened. She didn’t know how to close it; she didn’t want to close it.
“God, I’m trying to live a Christian life. Help me to resist temptation,” Shante prayed. She thought about how her life had changed since she had become a Christian. She knew if she were the same person she was before she became a Christian, she would have been in Max’s bed without thinking twice. She wanted to be in his bed. “God, help me.”
She had been tempted many times, especially right after she had given her life to Christ. On a couple of occasions, she had given in to temptation. Each time she’d repented, she had turned around and had done it again. Then, one day a strong conviction came upon her. She couldn’t do it anymore. She vowed to be celibate until she got married. She embraced her work and became very successful. She lost some things in the process—like time with Camille for instance. She distanced herself from any man who was interested in her. She knew her weaknesses and considered every invitation for dinner a date with temptation. Distancing herself was the only thing she knew how to do. No one in the church was teaching her how to resist. They only taught her to say no to sex, but temptation was all around her—like tonight. However, this was different; she really cared about Max. Maybe she cared too much. She would have to distance herself. But how? She would have to wait until Josh was all healed. At the moment, Max needed her.